I thought up this odd story in school. Yeah... it's self-explanatory.

The first time Seto met the talking rooster, he thought, as always, that he was hallucinating, that this was some sort of trick somehow played by Yugi and his silly friends. It didn't help that the rooster followed him home, only to be discovered by Mokuba.

"Niisama, you brought home a rooster! And he talks!"

Seto abhorred that notion. "Cocks can't talk," he said simply. "Don't be ridiculous."

"You know," said the cock in a posh British accent, "I am offended by your disbelief in my existence."

"I can hear him quite clearly," said Mokuba. "He can talk."

"If you so desire," said the rooster, "I could speak in the vicinity of someone else."

To which Seto replied, "You don't exist. Please leave."

Unfortunately for Seto, the rooster did exist. And it could talk. It could talk very well, in fact. The cock's range of vocabulary was astounding, and it was apparently well-educated, too, for it spoke its opinion often.

It was a beautiful cock, too, with golden brown feathers and a high tail. It strutted around confidently, the red meat on its head a symbol of its power. The rooster paraded and swaggered all about the Kaiba household, for all attempts to keep it in one spot mysteriously failed. It chatted with maids, who walked away feeling bewildered that they just talked to a farm animal.

It was particularly annoying in the morning, for not only did Seto's windows in his bedroom face east, but the cock liked sleeping in his room. And so, when the first edges of the sun were visible, the cock perched on his bedpost and shouted at the top of its lungs, "cocorico!"

Seto struggled awake, not prepared to arise for another hour and a half. In his sleep-numbed haze, he asked the cock, "Aren't you supposed to say 'cock-a-doodle-doo'?"

"I'm in Japan," replied the rooster. "I say cocorico in Japan."

"O…K…." Not sure of what to think, Seto lay back down in an attempt to fall back asleep. Just as he was drifting off, the cock once again cried "cocorico!" This time, the teenaged CEO shot straight up from his bed in white fury and glared at the bird. "What do you want?" he cried in exasperation.

"I don't have a name," said the cock simply.

"Really," said Seto flatly. "Of all your life of talking, you've never been given a name."

"Correct you are, good sir," said the cock. It paused. "Well, actually, I've had multiple. But I don't recall them."

Seto sighed and flopped back down on his bed, planning on ignoring this most annoying creature. But the cock spoke once more. "I won't let you go back to sleep until I have a name."

"Why is a name so important to you?"

"In all honesty, it makes me feel special."

Seto sighed again. "Alright fine, I'll give you a name." Seto thought long and hard about this name. Nothing he immediately thought of seemed to fit the rooster. Thinking about fellow CEOs whom he respected - and that number was few - he decided upon the name "Richard."

The rooster seemed pleased about this, but it wanted more. "Give me a nickname," it requested. "I beseech you."

The CEO of whom Seto had thought of went by the name of "Dick." And so that is what he called the cock. "Your name is Richard, and you will be called Dick."

The rooster made a happy chirp and jumped down from its perch on the bedpost, its wings flapping wildly to slow its fall. "Thank you, good sir. I very much like the name Dick. I shall be sure to remember it."

It's in a sort of... Englanese, or Japlish, world, combining both the sub and dud. Feel free to review. And remember, there is no vulgarity in this story. Whatsoever.