This I just sat down and wrote. Tell me what you think.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Naruto or otherwise.
The scream happened to echo throughout the whole building making the floors. Walls. Doors. Everything tremble, afraid? Of what though. What out there is there to be afraid of?
If that question is going through your mind right now then you really have not seen the world I have seen nor have you experienced pain of great amounts. You have not had to live a life of pain or torture. You have not had to be hated, hated with amounts that can, and will taint your mind. Make you want to die from the overwhelming hatred and bloodlust in the air whenever you're around.
I am screaming for help. Over and over and over, but who would want to help the monster, the demon. The one who practically massacred the village of Konoha. What reason would there be for it?
Their logic: Kill it, not him it doesn't deserve that much of a title, make it bleed. Torture it for all the pain of Konoha's people. A blow for a person. A laceration for a family. A stab wound for loved ones. An assassination technique for the village. But yet it wasn't just like that. There were many people, families, loved ones lost in the bijuu's battle. Under Kyuubi's paws.
It seemed as though only a select few actually cared for me. For many just wanted pain and suffering, there were some who wanted to care and understand, help the 'demon' even.
But why was this cursed upon my shoulders. A boulder weighing down my back. Why was I the one who happened upon this fate.
Why me?
"Naruto!" a voice yelled snapping me out of my thoughts.
I looked in the direction of the voice ending up face to face with my teammates and Kakashi staring at me like I had grown another head.
"Yes?" I asked curiously. What was with that look?
"Are you okay? Your face… Well you looked kinda depressed." Sakura stated.
Crap. That was the only word in my mind now. In all my thinking my mask had fallen and I let myself be open. They had taken a glance into my soul and beyond all the cheerful crap I place before them. All the cheeriness of which I use to mask what I really feel. Stupidity for brilliance.
What would the villagers say to the 'Kyuubi brat' having more power than the chunnin and most of the lower level jounin? Well they'd make even more of an attempt to get Lady Death herself to take Naruto with her to never-ending bliss of death.
Memories, they are not always something to be glad to have. Sometimes they are all that keep you sane. Sometimes they are what makes you swing the other way, sometimes they lead to your insanity.
"Naruto!"
"Hehe sorry guys. My mind keeps wandering away" I gave them my best 'embarrassed smile' and put my hand behind my head.
Sakura looked concerned for a moment the looked back to her precious Sasuke-kun. How she disgusts me. But as a boy who is pretending everything he must also pretend to have a crush. Somebody who he likes. In all actuality its one of the people who is most hated in my mind. With no reason to be a ninja.
"Okay if Naruto is feeling up to it we have a mission today. So lets head to the tower." Kakashi said as if waiting for me to protest. I nodded, Sasuke "hn'd" and Sakura screamed about how cool he was and how sexy his voice was. How strong he was and nothing could beat him. I almost laughed. She knew nothing. But for the sake of my life and many others who would die if my patience proved to be not enough I put on a face and drawled out a "Sakura-chhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn" not wanting to be outdone.
We headed over to the tower and I put my mind on auto making it scream out stupid things with dattebayo at the end of it all. (if there are spelling errors, until I get a beta. Please let me know and I will correct them) My mind shut down and I went to Kyuu's cage and sat down curling up inside her tails.
I snapped back out of it when the Hokage stated we had 3 options.
"We have 3 available missions. You can weed Fukuoka-sans garden. You can walk the Inuzuka dogs. Or The Devil Cat needs to be caught again." He sighed after the last one. The Daimyo's wife's cat always ran away. Had been since the Hokage was a Gennin.
"NO!" My mind protested. Apparently I said it out loud as well. Oh well. It might get us a better mission. "Not more D rank missions. We have been on plenty we deserve at least a C rank. There is only so much we can do for our teamwork before even getting near a real mission. You can't keep us from everything oji-san." I stated. The last bit had a double meaning, and by the look in his eyes he caught it.
"YEA!" Sakura yelled.
"Hn" Sasuke said. But giving a death glare all the same, as if that would stop the Hokage.
"Well… we do have a C rank mission your team would be able to accomplish if you think there up to it Kakashi." Sarutobi-san stated. That's right I do show respect for the Hokage whether people think it or not. Sarutobi-san is the only one who knows about my mask. And unless I decide to show it that secret will die with him. He and I are pretty much on equal terms, fighting wise that is. But only because he has weakened down in speed, strength and stamina +with old age. Other than that with his knowledge and experience he beats me.
"Yes. Lets hear it if you think its good then I'm sure it'll be fine Hokage-sama." Kakashi replied. A giggle following and a blush adorning his cheeks. No doubt due to his book.
"Very well. It's a escort mission. Your to take Tazuna-san back to the Land of Waves. Then guard him as he finishes the bridge." Sarutobi said while nodding over to the door where an ANBU stood guard of all the waiting clients."Send in Tazuna-san."
The man who entered wasn't anything who I thought it would be. I was thinking some young guy with quite a build. What we got was a drunk old man whose heart beat went erratic as soon as he saw us. His face flush and his straw hat sideways.
"These er the kidzz who're gunna be guarding me? The blonde one's ah shrimp… doesn't look like he could do nuthin." He muttered. But as trained ninja's well except maybe Sakura, we all heard him.
"Care to repeat that?" I asked letting the mask go from my eyes. I gave my best glare while putting in some emotionless… Overall, I made my eyes look dead. My sky blue eyes went cold, hard, blank.
Tazuna-san dropped his bottle of sake, and by the smell of it wet his pants. Then flushed bright red.
"Naruto, Enough!" Sarutobi-san said, quick to notice the mans fear.
"Okay Oji-san" I cheered. Knowingly freaking the man out more.
"Anyway team. You have an hour before we meet at the Northern gates. We'll see you there Tazuna-san." Kakashi said.
"Don't be late" Sasuke grumbled.
"Naruto I need to talk to you" Sarutobi-san said.
"HAI!" I yelled.
After Tazuna, Sakura, Kakashi and Sasuke left I dropped my mask. My face blank, emotionless, cold.
"What can I do for you Sarutobi-san?" I asked.
"*Sigh* Naruto I told you, you don't need to act like this anymore. You're a ninja now you're allowed to be cold. God knows you have every right reason to. Why don't you let the mask down so people can know the real you?" he questioned. Like this conversation came up almost never… ha right. He bugs me about it whenever he has the chance.
"Oji-san, I told you already. If I let it down the villiagers will do there worse, worse than it is now. I'll have to live in a cave, that nobody can ever find to stay away. They have taken everything from me Oji-san. I wont give them the pleasure of taking anything more." I said memories swirling.
Flashback
Mika-sama! Don't Leave Me!
Why Mika-sama Why.
"Why do you have to leave me. Why when I trusted you!" I asked.
"Because you took away everything from me. So its only fair to do the same in return. You took my husband, my parents, my children. They were only 4. Twins. Do your remember them. Kyuubi! DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT YOU TOOK FROM ME!!" she yelled hysterically.
"Mika-sama. What are you talking about? Why are you calling me Kyuubi? My name is Naruto. You know that."
"HAHAHAHA! You can't fool me Kyuubi!. I've seen the real you. You come home late at night, bloody and bruised. Having probably killed more people and hidden there bodies, not wanting them to be found. And who knows how long you've gotten away with this. We needed for you to see how painful it is for you to be betrayed and to lose those close to you. I was willing to take the job, I had nothing to lose! Face It Kyuubi! Your Pathetic!" She screamed. She was like my mother. And she too betrayed me. Is there anyone other than the Hokage that I can trust?
That night I was faced with betrayal and rage… I didn't mean to kill her! I promise I didn't. But she came at me with a kunai and I dodged. When she came at me again I grabbed her hand and she said she wouldn't let me take over her mind anymore and pulled her hand towards her heart. It was like I stabbed her. I didn't mean to.
I was almost six. When I made my first kill that is. They say you get over it but when there a person you were close to even if they betrayed you, even if it wasn't really your fault. The guilt is still there bubbling inside you waiting to take over. Waiting to become so strong you'll lose control on reality. Securing you in a small room inside your mind making you watch it over and over. The scene of there death. The nightmares of the consequences. Everything.
Flashback end
It hurts.
It changes you.
But not always for the better.
It made me realize how sick this world was. And so I went. And I found Kyuubi, was called to her actually. And talked. She's not like everyone says. She's kind. Really she is.
I noticed I was in Sarutobi's office still. He knew that my flashbacks took me in deep. I had twenty minutes still to be at the gate.
"Thanks" I called as I shushined to my home. Leaving no smoke in my wake but blackness swirls. Almost like black flames… but going sideways, in circles. Okay so not really but still.
At home I packed everything in storage scrolls putting them in my backpack to make it seem as though I wasn't as smart.
I rushed to the gate to meet my team.
And unknowingly meet my fate.
A/N okay guys. I need the feedback! How is it. (was it)
I need to know whether or not to write more. I kinda just sat down and wrote so if its changing moods that'll be why.
Criticism welcomed!!
Thanks for reading.