Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

A Pumpkin in Easter

A Fred and George Story (with an appearance from Charlie Weasley)

Fred and George weren't kidding when they said that they thought they should have received all E's on their OWLs. It wasn't because they thought they were utterly deserving of the marks when you looked at the work they presented on the day. But that was because it was only one of them presenting. If the examiners had seen what they could do as "FredandGeorge" instead of Mr. Frederic Elmer Weasley* and Mr. George Ellard Weasley** they would have given them O's! All the same the grades they did get weren't that bad considering they only knew half the syllabus for each of their classes with the other twin knowing the other half. But it's not like they could tell Mum that without getting even worse than a Howler in live action from her.

You see what the twins had discovered, long ago, was that not even their own mother could tell the difference between them unless she was at the absolute top of her game and had nothing else on her plate. Which in a house of nine people (plus ghoul) didn't happen very often. So they had both used this to their advantage time and time again in attempts to get out of trouble. But there were only so many times that George could say "It was George! I'm Fred!" and Fred could reply with "No! I'm Fred! Punish him!" before their entire family just got sick of it and Charlie began the trend of punishing them both together no matter who had actually done the crime (they had gotten him back for that rather spectacularly – but then he locked them out in the pig pen and they had to come up with something even more devious).

They had thought that they could get away with more when they started at school and for a while they did… but then they were too well known too soon and eventually before the end of their first year Charlie brought McGonagall in on the idea of punishment as a thing twins 'shared'. Charlie tried to get out of the blame for this gross betrayal of brotherhood by claiming "It's always the pair of you who do whatever it is anyway (true but not a valid point) and I can't imagine that you either of you have much fun waiting around for the other to get out of detention (true – but he couldn't use concern for their welfare when separated as an excuse for getting them both punished!). Besides you never know what going to happen on a detention, I've had some of my best fun at Hogwarts when in detention!" It was with that final declaration that the twins both agreed that Charlie was as mad as Bill had always said he was despite being a brilliant Quidditch player and a much preferred brother over Perfect Percy and Ickle Baby Ronniekins (and sometimes even Bill – especially after he got so unreasonably angry over their considerate actions in giving him a haircut when he came home from sixth year so that he wouldn't have to argue with Mum about it, ungrateful preening prat).

So while Charlie had given them up to McGonagall and Filch to suffer conjoined punishment for the rest of their school careers he still had to be thanked for being the inspiration for what they both had to agree was their most brilliant, incredible, devious idea ever. One idea that had served them well through all their school years. They also hoped that by blaming part of it on Charlie they might be able to deflect some of the punishment away from them if they were ever caught.

This piece of brotherly stimulated genius happened over the Easter holidays of their second year when Charlie was stopping in at home for the traditional Weasley Sunday Lunch. The twins had raced off after devouring their chocolates and some of Ginny and Ron's as well truth be told but not any of Percy's because he had given them a warning that when they got back to school it would be just them and him and he knew far more curses than them and that he wouldn't get caught. Charlie had stopped Molly from calling them back by saying he'd watched them and that it would be better if they burned off some of their energy before coming back. If the first hadn't convinced Molly the later definitely told her that the twins would be easier to handle in the evening if they were less hyper and now Ron and Ginny were crying over something, and anyway Charlie knew first aid and could manage any of the minor scrapes the twins could get into. She hoped.

When they were all out of sight of the Burrow Charlie lit up a More and the twins pulled what looked a lot like the components for homemade fireworks out of their pockets. Most of the stuff looked like it had been nicked from Mums potion cabinet and Dads shed. Charlie didn't need to ask how they'd gotten into either because it had been Charlie himself who'd taught them how to pick locks, both magical and muggle. ***

"You two aren't actually going to blow yourselves up, are you?" asked Charlie eyeing them cautiously as he took a drag. "Only if I don't bring you precious angels back home to Mum in pristine condition, she's going to be pissed."

"You sure you're not going to get cancer from smoking those things?" asked Fred, not looking up from the things he was meticulously lining up on a pinched napkin.

"Only cuz, if you do Mum'll go on a rampage to find out who knew you smoked and why we all didn't stop you from poisoning your precious athlete's lungs," finished George, biting his lip as he carefully measured out the charcoal.

Charlie smiled down at his brothers. He really was so proud at their ability to talk back, how boring would it be if they didn't have a bit of cheek? Anyway, he knew the twins wouldn't tell Mum about his smoking because once in the past when the issue had come up between him and the twins, Charlie had mentioned that in Mums search to find all the cigarettes in the house she might just look under the twins beds and possibly find some of their Fillibuster stash. And while she was on a mission to purge the house of all things dangerous to her children's health those fireworks could cause quite a stir. They had come to an agreement of mutual survival over it after that, one of 'don't tell and especially don't tell mum'.

"And how much trouble do those tongues get you into back at school?" he queried around the cigarette between his teeth settling down against the stone wall that marked the edge of Weasley property. He pulled a muggle paperback out of his pocket, his mate Jerrell had recommended it and so far Elric hadn't disappointed.

"Too much," replied Fred emphatically, squinting down at the measurement cup that he was pouring some silver aluminium dust into.

"Yeah, we're never allowed to get away with anything!" replied George and he tried to push a kitchen knife into the under ripe pumpkin he gotten from the yard.

"Even things other kids get nothing more than a Look for from McGonagall!" complained Fred.

"That's because McGonagalls canny enough to know if she gave either of you an inch you'd trample over it in seven league boots in a mad rush," he took a drag, looking up from turning a page and rolled his eyes. He got up and went over to where his brothers squatted, plucking the kitchen knife from Georges hand before settling himself back down. "Gimme that before you slice your hand open," with a tap of his wand the kitchen knife became a far more dangerous-looking-than-necessary carving knife, then Charlie picked up the pumpkin and began carving off its top, while George began to sort through various powder dyes. "The problem with you two is that you've got absolutely no brakes. Or at least you don't seem too to teachers. If McGonagall let you get away with something harmless then in no time at all you'd be right little terrorists – probably blowing staircases or something," said Charlie, gesturing with his knife out to the chemicals laid out before him. He wondered maybe if he could be held accountable for whatever mayhem the twins reaped with the muggle children's chemistry set he got them for Christmas. Mum probably would, he figured, but she held you accountable if you didn't think twelve steps ahead of very action you took. It made her a killer chess player and a near clairvoyant mother.

"But it's still not fair," whined Fred. He passed a spoon to Charlie to take the pulp out of the pumpkin. "Leave some of that in, we want it to really go splat!" Charlie rolled his eyes.

"Y'know one day I going to read in the Prophet that you two are the wizarding worlds most wanted and there'll be a quote from Mum in it saying: 'It's all their brother Charlies fault he encouraged them to be so destructive!'" he finished imitating his Mums voice to near perfection. The twins giggled, glancing at one another, it wasn't often at home you heard a joke about Mum.

"Yeah, that's if we're ever not doing detention in Hogwarts, I mean, I think McGonagalls starting to punish us pre-emptively!" exclaimed George indignantly. Charlie had finished with the pumpkin to Fred and George's satisfaction and they were now carefully placing a well wrapped paper ball held together with a few finely cut strips of Spellotape in the pumpkins semi-hollowed out centre.

"Well, I suppose she thinks if you get detention enough then you'll realise that it's a bad thing," said Charlie watching as Fred put the pumpkin top back on and George Spellotaped it down tight. "Or maybe it's just that she thinks if she gives you detention enough there'll be no opportunities for you two to get into anymore trouble."

The twins snorted in unison as they gingerly picked up the pumpkin bomb from the ground and began crab walking out into the middle of the field. Charlie picked up the odds and ends left behind on the ground, transfiguring the knife back into table ware and vanishing all the left over pumpkin pulp. He dropped his cigarette to the ground, crushing it under his foot as he walked after the twins.

"So what gave you the idea to build a bomb out of a pumpkin anyway?" he asked, taking out his lighter and another cigarette. He lit up putting the packet of Mores back in his pocket, fiddling with the lighter in his right hand.

"We got the idea at Halloween at school," said George trailing a fuse line out of the top of the pumpkin.

"Yeah, Dumbledore had the great ones hovering in the Great Hall that popped into streamers and lights," enthused Fred, as he held his hand out to Charlie expectantly. "Gimme the lighter Char?"

"Excuse me?" asked Charlie his eyebrows raised.

"I said, 'Please O mighty Charlie, greatest of all brothers ever and anywhere, would you please bequeath to me your lowly second youngest" "Third!" "brother your magnificent light of power, so that I and my humble twin may bring this pumpkin to its explosive and sticky end?" asked Fred, down on one knee his hands held out before him, head bowed.

"Well," said Charlie handing it over with a roll of his eyes. "Since you asked so nicely and all."

Fred lit the fuse and all three of them ran back to the wall, Charlie flicking his wand as he went sending the pumpkin straight up into the air. They reached the wall and turned back in time to see the pumpkin burst with a magnificent bang and lots of red smoke. They exchanged grins as burst pumpkin rained from the sky.

"So," asked Charlie, crushing the butt of his cigarette under his heel as they turned to go back to the Burrow. "Have you guys decided what you're going to sign up for next year?"

"No, not yet," answered Fred turning away from the still smouldering bits of pumpkin.

"There's too much to choose from," complained George, stamping out a small fire set from a burning piece of pumpkin.

"We want to do something fun," continued Fred.

"But a lot of stuff looks fun," went on George.

"Considering how much trouble you two get into, what you to should be aiming for are teachers who aren't big on punishment," Charlie smiled.

"Don't think there's a teacher like that in Hogwarts," George grinned back.

"What the problem is," said Fred insistently. "Is that there's too much to choose from and we don't know what we want to do after school."

"I never really got why they expect you to know what you want to study after just two years of school," said Charlie. "But the good thing is if you don't like whatever it is you do end up choosing you can always leave the class."

"Pity there isn't a class about making bombs," said George slyly.

"Yeah!" grinned Fred. "We'd get all O's in that!"

"Oh, so the problem is just that Hogwarts just doesn't have a class for your area of expertise," said Charlie rolling his eyes. The twins laughed.

"Y'know," said Charlie looking down at his brothers. "It's a pity that everyone knows you guys are twins."

"What?" they asked, squinting up at Charlie.

"Well," he continued, eyeing them slyly. "You two really are identical."

"So?"

"Well, if you'd both been enrolled in under the one name only one of you would have had to go to class at a time," said Charlie very clearly, stopping and turning to face them the sun setting behind him. "I mean take choosing your classes for next year if the two of you were only seen as the one, you could sign up for twice as many classes and each of you could attend one on the same period and yet it would all go under the same name."

The twins stared up at Charlie their mouths slightly agape. He couldn't mean what they thought he meant…?

"But you are under different names," said Charlie turning back and heading on to the Burrow, putting his hands behind his head and stretching his arms up. "So I suppose it doesn't really matter much, does it?" he smiled at them over his shoulder and the twins grinned back, running to catch up to him.

"Nope, guess it doesn't" said Fred, a plan already forming in his head.

"Not at all," finished George, his mind racing along with Fred's.

That was it, they were sold. The idea turned into a reality when they signed up for a couple of different classes upon their return to school. Some of the teachers gossiped about it, wondering what was happening for twins as close as Fred and George to want to split up for the sake of their education. Some thought it was a sign that they were maturing and taking what they were leaning at Hogwarts more seriously. Others just kept a watchful eye out for the punch line, but this was one joke that they were never going to reveal.

The way it worked was that on Mondays after lunch Fred was signed up for Magical Physiology, while George was signed up for The Beginnings of Magical Healing. They would each go through one week in their class then brief each other over the weekend on what had happened then for the next week they would switch classes. George would study as Fred and Fred would study as George.

The system wasn't perfect of course, and there were some near misses in getting caught. But as George said "They can't really get mad at us because we're really getting twice the education of anyone else here!".

So when it came time to take their OWLs they did actually sit as themselves. But they had an understandably lack of answers for some questions because occasionally the time they usually allotted to go over what they'd done in the last week of classes was spent (very industriously) preparing some of their more interesting fun making ideas. But they couldn't tell Mum that they didn't get enough OWLs because they'd been switching classes with each other, because she'd probably make them go back to third year and repeat it all properly. That would be death by shame.

They only ever told Lee Jordan about their 'arrangement'. It was when they figured he was their best friend even as close as they were to each other. They always thought that Charlie knew what they were doing but he never mentioned it again. They still thought he was crazy beyond belief sometimes but they always remembered that he was crazy like a fox.

Not so much as them of course.

*/**Elmer and Ellard are the middle names of the twins in this short because they're what I think Molly would have called the twins but then her younger twin brothers died and she honoured them by carrying on the F and G legacy but kept Elmer and Ellard as middle names. Elmer means 'noble and famous' so I though it suited Fred more and Ellard means 'noble and brave' so they fit with each other. I know lots of people like the idea of Fabien and Gideon as middle names but that means their initials would be FFW and GGW or FGW and GFW and that's just kind of silly to me.

*** I imagine Charlie teaching the twins to pick locks because that's the sort of thing an older brother who helps you turn vegetables in to bombs would do. I suppose that Charlie would have learned to lock pick from Bill because a future curse breaker would have had to have practised on something.

For anyone curious as to how you make a bomb like this: I will NOT be giving out that information. But yes, though I have cut out details what Fred and George were doing would have worked. The only liberty I took with science was the clouds of red smoke because they had to improve it with something magical. Please remember that making homemade explosives is very dangerous and though Fred and George and Charlie get away with it, not everyone will. Also you'd probably get arrested.

Thank You for reading this one-shot. I might write more like it but don't expect any soon. Still if you liked this one – leave a review with you thoughts!