Music to My Ears

Chapter 1: flash backs flash back

"Bella, we're leaving." Edward said. We're leaving? Where are we going? Why are we leaving, is Victoria here? Will the whole family be coming with us?

"Where are we going? Why are we leaving, Edward?" I saw the sad, grief look in his eyes, why does he look that way? Why is he sad? But as soon as those dark emotions came they were gone, almost so fast that I was almost not sure if I saw them.

"We are not going anywhere, I am –with my family- leaving, we can't stay here, Carlisle can hardly pass as 30 and he is posing as 36."

" cant I go with you?" I was starting to just get the idea of what he was saying. He was leaving and I was not. Does he not love me, I knew it was to good to be true, I knew it didn't make sense for him to love me, I knew the sad truth from the very beginning sadly, I was to selfish to see it and not let go I wanted him for myself, to selfish, holding him back.

" No."

" You… you don't…don't want me?"

" No, I… I don't." I couldn't bear to look at his face, his beautiful scorching ocher eyes. I was going into MAJOR breakdown; I don't know why I let him be this big a part of my life. I knew it would hurt when he worded the sad truth, but I didn't know that it would hurt this badly, I could feel the ghost of a whole push its way into my chest.

" Bella? Before I go, can you promise me something?" oh, what did he want me to promise, to forget about him, no way, that would be impossible, mission impossible.

"Uh…well…I, I guess," I mumbled, already knowing what he would want me to promise: move on, please don't follow me, I'm leaving. I knew he was to much of a gentleman to say that to me, but that must be what he wants, what else could he want, he doesn't love me.

"Bella, please don't do anything reckless or stupid while I'm gone." He sounded almost like he was pleading with me, like he wanted me to live after he left. But I don't see why he would, I'm just a worthless human that has walked into his life and messed up his family-thinking about my birthday, when Jasper tried to take a snap at me when I got a paper cut.

" Alright, I…I promise." I knew my face gave away my emotions, he could see them, I know it, the look in his eyes showed me he sees it…

" Good-bye Bella." He caressed my check with the back of his ice cold, rock hard hand. Then he was gone, just like that, I knew that if I tried to follow him I would get lost, but the only thing that was on my mind was "he doesn't want me…"

I wandered aimlessly for hours I could feel the air around me start to get moist and chilly, I could see the dimming of the green light from the sunset through the trees, faintly, I could hear someone calling my name… "Bella! Bella?! Where are you? BELLA!" to soon I could not see the ground, my legs were so tired that I didn't even feel them cave until I felt my head hit the ground, hard. But that doesn't matter, you know why? Because he doesn't love me anymore, he doesn't love me. He's gone; gone forever he doesn't love me.

I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing that I was conscious of was a low bass voice calling my name, asking me something, " Are you alright, are you Isabella Swan?"

" Huh, I…I mean yah, I'm Isabella swan, why? Who are you, where am I?" I was really confused, where am I, I don't remem- its all coming back to me now, Edward…Edward, he left, he left me, he said he doesn't love me, he left…

I started to weep, I couldn't believe myself, I thought he really loved me!! I thought he said he loved me with all his heart, but no, he decided to break mine. I bet he never loved me! I started to bawl now, wow could I have been so stupid? Why was I so stupid, I knew it didn't make sense for him to love me, but I still gave him my heart, why did I do that, I could feel the whole in my chest now, not just a ghost, now just a big, empty, menacing whole in my chest, it will probably never go away, I loved him so much, more then I thought I did, this whole was REALLY big, it scared me. I think if I let it, it could take up all of me, swallow me whole consume me in my own misery. At that moment though, I wanted it to, to consume me, eat me up, never to see the light again. I felt dead, I was so close to it though, I wish it would come closer, its just out of my reach now, teasing me, I'm about to go under, almost there…"Bella, please, oh, lord, please let her come around, please let her wake up! Oh my god! What will Renée think…" Renée? My mom? Oh god, oh god, please don't let her know! "NO!!"I didn't even realize that I had screamed that until I opened my eyes and saw everybody looking at me.

Wow, there were a lot of people in here, more then I thought could fit in this little house.

" Bella!" I heard my dad cry. I must have given him a real scare, disappearing like that, even with those huge bears out on the loose. I shivered. I felt someone put a blanket on me mistaking my shiver of fear as a chill.

" what happened, I thought you were going on a walk with Edward…" my dad was almost hysteric. So I told them, all of them what happened, well all I could tell them anyway. At the end of my explanation I started to get worried for my dad's health, he was reaching a strange shade of purplish-blue, I hope he doesn't have a heart attack…

End of Flash Back

That was 30 years ago, this is now:

Ever sense then I have been alone, I turned sort of emo, well not really, I never cut myself -for fear that Edward was near, watching over me, then smell my blood and jump me- but I did wear all black and wore black make-up, I even died my hair black. I wrote songs and formed a band called "life sux xxx".

We got a record deal and now are touring the world, sometimes I wish that Edward or one of the Cullens hear my music, because its all directed at them. My band consists of Emily, Eden, Ethan, Mack, and me, the singer. The only thing is, we are all vampires. I have turned down many great looking guys but I will never love another man/vampire than Edward Cullen.

But that is just the beginning of my story…

Flash Back

My band and I were sitting in my penthouse living room-this was only 1 ½ years after Edward left me- when we heard a smash and saw the glass shatter from the back wall of the room, there stood a feline looking, fiery redhead that seeked for my death as revenge, Victoria.

All of my band knows about my past, every last detail. I told them everything, I knew that they could be trusted, so I poured my heart out, they and only they don't question the reason behind the lyrics to my songs. They know everything, so when they saw her standing there they knew exactly who she was, what she was. And most importantly what would happen if she were to come for me. These were my true friends Emily, Eden, Ethan, Mack, and Angela. Angela was still herself, not goth, or emo, just my same old friend I met in high school. She knew too. I had many more, but the others were not as loyal as these, they fled when I told them. They thought I was crazy, or they were not just willing to risk their life for my friendship.

" Miss me, Isabella Marie Swan?" Victoria said in her sickly sweet voice, not velvet as the other vampires'.

" No, I was not missing you, Victoria." I spat her name with disgust.

"Oh, what a shame, I missed you. I thought I lost you, until you made the news, radio stations, and newspapers with your band." She smirked, then she lunged. At that moment all I could feel was her razor sharp teeth cut the skin on my throat. I let out an ear splitting scream. Good thing that this penthouse is sound proof, nobody will hear my screams or struggles with the pain I am about to endure.

But then she did the one thing that I thought she wouldn't do, she bit everybody else to. I don't know why I thought she wouldn't, knowing her nature but I couldn't help but feel disappointed because now we would all have to vampires, not just me. I never intended for them to become one of the eternal dammed-as Edward would have called it.

I could feel it now, the venom rushing through my body, setting it all on fire. God this burned! Now I know why Edward never wanted this for me, all of this pain that I would have to endure, I knew that I would have to feel it sooner or later. Then I would have wanted it to be sooner, but know, I am actually wishing for death. I have only been this close, this close to the dark cold grasp of death's clutches once, when Edward left me….

We all had to contain our screams to a minimal, for the glass was broken so we had to hold it in, when we could. That was not very often though. We stayed on the ground for three days writhing in pain, I felt so sorry for my friends, the people who meant everything to me. I never, ever intended on them to get bitten, to turn into vampires and live for eternity. Oh, how I loath myself right now I bet if jasper were here right now he would have killed himself from all the emotions in the room right now.

After about three days the pain started to decrease and our heartbeats started to get slower, less frequent, I think that was the MOST painful thing I have ever felt! I know this might sound strange, but I don't feel the burning in my throat the cullens said would happen when they get to thirsty. I was planning on following Carlisle's diet, so I was hoping that all my friends are planning on doing that to. Though right now all of my friends are still writhing in pain, it is almost to hard to watch, though I can see the pain starting to fade as their screams are becoming even less frequent and I can hear the skowing of the heartbeats, only four of the five hearts are still beating. I let out a dry sob, I will miss the steady beat of my heart, the warmth of my blushes, the coolness of things that I used to think as cold, but now, everything but the snow will fell warm to me, us.

As everybody stops their screams we just stand there, thinking over how this will affect things. We will not be able to go outside in the sun. we will need an excuse for our exterior looks.

" I got it!!" Ethan yelled. " Bot-ox." everybody just looked at him, thoughtful for a moment.

Out of no were I just all of a sudden burst out, "guys, I am SOOO sorry!! I never meant for this to happen, I never meant for you guys to get bitten, I'm so so sooo sorry!" I was dry sobbing, everybody rushed over- stunned by the speed they could go now- to comfort me, even though I didn't deserve it, this was all my fault, everybody just lost their souls because of me, and I am the one who they are comforting.

" Bella! This is NOT your fault! You didn't know she would come back, especially when we were all here, and you even said yourself, 'I don't know if she gave up or not, you guys are all targets just by being with me' when you told us about your past. We were caught off guard, but we were all expecting it." Emily said. She was like a sister to me, I love her so much, as I do with everybody here.

"now, your throats must be on fire, lets go hunting. There's only one rule though…"I trailed off, they all know what I was about to say.

" no humans." They all said at once. as of that, we were off.

End of Flash Back