The story's title is from the song "Light Outside" by Wakey!Wakey!. All of the chapter titles come from various songs by the same band.

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Disclaimer: I own nothing except for the plot and any original characters that may be added in later. All rights over characters of the TV show Arrow belong to CW Television and DC Comics.


Sometimes I Wonder How You Stay So Sad (When You're So Beautiful)

October 2000

It was a cold, rainy afternoon at Starling City Preparatory School and, like most kids his age, Oliver Queen hated school. He had never been the smartest kid in his class - school had never come easy to him - but what he did love was sports. Recess was always his favorite part of the day, loving being able to get out of the classroom into the fresh air and play with his best friend since childhood, Tommy Merlyn. However, today was not looking good for recess. Even though it never got too cold in Starling City, it often rained a lot this time of year. And Tommy just so happened to be sick with a nasty cold, so he was not even there for Oliver to play inside with. Whenever the weather was bad outside, all the classes in this specific hallway gathered in the largest room, Miss Holloway's first grade classroom, so that all the kids could be watched at once - which just gave the teachers an excuse to do work without really paying attention to the kids.

Oliver was bored out of his mind as he watched kids around him playing with dolls and putting puzzles together. Deciding that he didn't want to just sit around, he walked towards the center table that was littered with different activities and grabbed a coloring book, then headed back towards the desk he was sitting at. Looking around for anyone with crayons to borrow, he spotted a young girl sitting by herself, coloring away without a care in the world. She appeared to be a little bit younger than him, with dark brown hair and adorable little glasses. Oliver stood up and walked towards her, reading the name tag that was on her desk, "Felicity Smoak? Hi, I'm Oliver Queen." The girl, Felicity, looked up suddenly, removing the red crayon from between her lips.

"Hello," Felicity replied shyly before returning to her drawing.

Oliver continued with a grin, "Can I borrow some crayons? I left mine in my classroom."

"Sure," she responded with a timid smile before gathering up a handful of different colored crayons, Oliver accepting them and muttering a thanks before retreating to his desk. After reaching his destination, Oliver gazed over his shoulder at Felicity, red crayon securely back between her lips, and smiled to himself before making what would be the best decision of his entire life. Lifting his coloring book, he sauntered back to Felicity's desk and pulled up a chair on his way.

"Mind if I sit here? Then we can both share all the colors. Is that okay?" Oliver asked with his signature grin on his face. Felicity looked up and nodded, a slight smile tugging up the corners of her mouth, blue eyes shining behind the small frames sitting atop her nose. Oliver had never in his life seen a pair of eyes so clear, so beautiful, so pure. And from then on out, he knew he never would.


July 2009

Oliver Queen loves parties. He loves the feeling he gets when he's dancing to the beat of the music, loves the freedom he experiences as the alcohol burns down his throat. And most importantly, he loves the constant flow of half-drunk girls trying to hook up with him. Oliver's never been one to have trouble getting girls; his family has more money than they know what to do with, he is extremely athletic and well built, and he knows how incredibly good-looking he is.

Right now, he is currently on another one of the many, many "breaks" with his girlfriend Laurel Lance. The two of them have been together on and off for most of high school, even though they are complete opposites. Sometimes he doesn't even know why they're together, other than the obvious fact that he's captain and center forward of the varsity soccer team and she's the captain of the dance team - which is much more talented than the regular cheerleaders according to Laurel. She is extremely smart and driven, while he barely even passed last year's classes. She wants a commitment, a future with marriage and kids and a white picket fence, while he just wants to live in the moment and enjoy his youth while he can. She is on the path towards Stanford Law, while he isn't even sure if he wants to go to college.

Oliver knows what's supposed to happen after graduation; he is supposed to attend an ivy league school, get his MBA and eventually ascend to his rightful place as CEO of his family's company, Queen Consolidated. Everyone - his mother, his father, Laurel - is always telling him, you're Robert Queen's son and you have a duty to one day take over his legacy. But the thing is, Oliver doesn't want to take over the company; he never has. Most of the time, he doesn't even want to be Robert Queen's son. For one day of his life, he wants to be Oliver. Just Oliver. But he's smart enough to know that that is an impossible dream.

Oliver walks towards the keg that's set up in the middle of Max Fuller's backyard, itching for another drink. Max is on the soccer team with Oliver, which is the only reason that he was invited to this party considering he slept with Max's girlfriend sophomore year. In his defense, he thought they'd broken up. Filling up his red cup with a hefty amount of beer, Oliver glances around the party looking for anyone interesting to talk to when he feels someone tap at his shoulder. He turns around and smirks as his eyes land on the one and only Sara Lance, Laurel's younger sister.

"Hey Ollie," Sara greets flirtatiously. She has always had a huge crush on him and just about everyone knows it, including Laurel. And Oliver being Oliver has never exactly put a stop to her constant flirting or lingering touches. What's he supposed to do? She's hot and he's only human.

Taking in her appearance, he grins, "Sara. What are you doing here? Isn't it 'family night' at the Lance household?"

She rolls her eyes, "It is, but my dad grounded me because I didn't do my chores. Little does he know, I have a window with a very loose screen in front of a giant tree." Smirking, she reaches over and slowly rubs along Oliver's forearm. "Laurel told me you guys broke up again. I'm sorry," she states, her voice tinged with insincere sympathy.

"Nah, we just had a fight. I'm sure we'll be fine in a day or two," Oliver chuckles.

"Are you sure? Because she sounded pretty convinced this time. What did you even argue about this time?"

"Honestly? I wasn't really paying attention to her. Something about 'having to focus on my schoolwork because it's senior year'. You know, the usual."

"Well if you guys do decide to finally call it quits, for good this time, you know I'm only a phone call away," Sara offers, batting her eyelashes in a way Oliver assumes she thinks is sexy but just makes her look like she has some sort of eye twitch.

He lets a broad smile spread across his lips. "I'll keep that in mind," he promises knowing that he's just leading her on. He loves Laurel and no matter what he does, she always forgives him. And then she forgives him.

After flashing one last smirk, Sara saunters away from him, adding a little extra sway to her hips and Oliver laughs, shaking his head at her antics. He wonders what Laurel would do if she knew what her baby sister was up to.


Quickly finishing up his beer, he tosses it in a nearby trash can and walks off in search of his best friend, knowing that she can always make him smile no matter what. Walking out to the pool deck and further into the backyard, Oliver observes the scattered partygoers: girls in bikinis running around, numerous couples making out on lounge chairs. Across the pool, his eyes find Felicity talking animatedly to her friend Caitlin and he immediately feels a large smile stretch across his face. She is so beautiful, with her golden hair that is glowing from the moonlight and her big, blue eyes shining as she smiles, having chosen to favor her contacts tonight instead of her usual square frames.

While in the middle of telling what appears to be a very funny story, Felicity notices Oliver just a few yards away, making eye contact with him as her smile softens, and she waves her fingers at him. She says goodbye to Caitlin, moving around her and nodding towards the beach that lay behind the Fuller's house. Oliver takes her cue and follows down the few steps until he reaches ground. He toes off his flip flops, enjoying the feel of the soft sand squishing in between his toes. Felicity stills and sits down a few feet from where the tide brushes the shore, patting the ground next to her telling Oliver to sit. After plopping down beside her, the sand bumpy beneath him, she finally speaks.

"It's crazy how small and irrelevant our world is compared to what's out there. Did you know that the universe is so big that it can take years for the light from the stars to travel to us? So technically, we could be looking into the past, at stars that don't even exist anymore," she explains, mesmerized by the dark sky littered with white.

Oliver stares at her, bewildered by how her mind works, how she can look at the simplest things and see everything. "They're just stars, Felicity. Just balls of fire that sit there, waiting to explode," he replies.

She turns to him, both curiously and mildly concerned, and asks, "Rough night?"

He shrugs, "Laurel kinda broke up with me. Again."

"What is that, like the third time this summer? Oliver, come on. You deserve better than that. You both do."

"It's not a big deal. We fight, she overreacts, I apologize, and we're fine."

"Well, what was it this time? Her issues with your partying and drinking? Did you hook up with another girl?" She jokes, "Oliver!" She smacks him on the chest with barely any real force.

He turns his head toward her, looking affronted and lightly rubs his chest where she hit him just seconds ago. "Hey! Ow!"

"Oh don't be a baby. Well? Did you?"

"No, Felicity, I did not hook up with another girl. And it hurts me that you think that I would do that, disrespect the sanctity of a relationship."

"Okay, one - you have done that, Max Fuller ring any bells? - and two - I'm kidding. I know you wouldn't do that to Laurel. I know who you are underneath that whole arrogant, spoiled, bad-boy façade you got goin' on Oliver Jonas Queen, and don't you forget it!"

Laughing, Oliver slings his left arm around her shoulder and pulls her down so her head rests lightly on the top of his arm.

"So what was the fight about?" she sighs in content.

"About senior year. Laurel thinks that I should try harder in school this year to ready myself for college. She says I need to grow up, be ready to take over the company."

"But you don't want that."

"No, I don't."

Felicity pulls away and twists herself to face him. "Oliver, I know you better than anyone. And I know that if you wanted to take over QC, you could. I have no doubt in my mind that you would make an amazing CEO. You're smart and kind and loyal, and you have an amazing heart. But I also know that wearing a suit and tie every day and working in an office on the top floor of a skyscraper would drive you insane. So," she continues, placing her hand on his left knee, "I think that you should stop thinking about what everyone wants from you and just think about what you want. I know that whatever you decide to do, you'll be amazing at, because I believe in you."

Oliver looks at her, stunned at how anyone can have so much faith in him. He's been a screw up his entire life: never earning the best grades, always getting into trouble, even getting arrested a few months ago for peeing on a cop while drunk - which was totally funny, if you ask him. The point is, he messes things up. No one thinks he can do anything right, especially his father. But Felicity... She has always believed in him and encouraged him, always seen the best in him no matter what mistakes he made. He cannot even fathom how he got so lucky as to have her in his life.

"Thank you, Felicity. I really needed to hear that," he smiles softly at her while brushing a loose piece of hair away from her face and behind her ear. "You're remarkable, you know that?"

Felicity feels her cheeks heat up at the compliment. It amazes him that after all these years, she still blushes when he compliments her. She smiles up at him, blue eyes shining, "Thank you for remarking on it."

Looking into her eyes as Felicity gazes up at him, hand still brushing against her cheek, Oliver finds his eyes drifting towards her mouth before flicking back up to her eyes. The moment is broken by his name being called in the distance. He recognizes the voice instantly as his other best friend and Oliver quickly removes the hand cradling Felicity's face.

"Ollie!" Tommy calls as he stumbles towards the pair, a little tipsy from the alcohol. "Where you been, man? And have you seen Lis anywhere?"

Felicity shifts away from Oliver, standing up and smiling at Tommy. "I'm here. We were just talking, we wanted to get away from the craziness."

Tommy walks to Felicity, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close, kissing her hard but quick. "Well I miss my girlfriend, so if Ollie is done monopolizing your time, let's go dance," he grins, throwing a wink at Oliver.

Oliver smiles back at his oldest friend, hoping it appears genuine. "She's all yours. I gotta head out anyway before my parents get home from that dinner thing. I'll see you guys later?" he says, directing the question more towards Felicity.

Her lips curl up softly and she nods her head while Tommy laces their fingers, leading her back towards the house. Oliver watches his two best friends and for some reason he doesn't quite understand, he can't shake the strange feeling he has in the pit of his stomach as he watches Felicity walk away.