My History Report: The Holocaust for Cartoons
A true, not so brief story bringing you the details of the mass murder of good cartoons which seemed to change Cartoon Network instantly without warning over the summer of 2006.
Chapter 1: The Secret Rise of Stuart Snyder
In fall 2007, a man by the name of Stuart Snyder came to power as President of Cartoon Network. Before his official rise to the position of president, he began his evil underground campaign of mass murder in summer of 2006, disguised as "refurbishing" his campaign began to put on action blocks, crowding the network. This was the first step to a new, dark era known as CN Real.
No one thought much of the change in programming. Some thought of the new fill-ins as a step to a new, bright era in programming, just like the CN City era at the time. It was mostly ignored by the 00-06 fans, including me. Even the people who despised these new shows had no idea that these new shows were setting in motion the largest systematic mass murder of an entire network in TV history. What these new programs did was crowd up the network with new parasite shows, over populating the network, to the annoyance of the classics. This new over-crowded population began to slowly push the classics off the air, one by one, never to be seen again. This was the beginning, good classics were pulled off the air, one by one for months without warning. It was here one week and gone the next without a word, as if it was lost, but this is far from the truth, the shows were not lost, they were murdered. After a show was murdered, it was nothing but a file locked in the back of the desk drawers of Stuart Snyder's office.
The youngest of the CN City era were first to go, such as Krypto, Hi Hi Puffy Ami Yumi, Megas XLR and all the other shows the premiered in late 2004 to mid 2005. This is why these shows were short lived. These shows hadn't been on the air for very long, so Stuart decided no one would notice if they disappeared. For now, the senior shows were immune, for Stuart knew that he couldn't cancel shows like Ed Edd'n Eddy or Codename: Kid's Next Door, because if people saw what he was doing back then, before the worst of this holocaust, he could have never had gotten away with it. He couldn't get rid of those shows without setting the entire world against him, at least, not now. He saw that he had to wait for these shows to end on there own, but he had to oppress these shows, so he stopped airing them until the show finale. His ultimate mission was to brainwash the next generation of CN fans, but if he was going to do that, he couldn't let them have a taste of REAL cartoons. So he silenced the surviving classics and aired them only when the new generation of fans were asleep, just to stop the senior fans from the 00-06 generation to stop watching the network. He still needed the old fans until their younger siblings started to watch the network, replacing the old fans and pissing them off with worthless shit like Jonny Test.
When 2007 began, the holocaust had grown and spread all over the network. With the start of the new year, the CN City was bombed, including all who lived there. Although the bumper's had stopped airing, the city was still the home of many classic cartoons, and now the grave of them. The city lies in ruins of what it once was. The bombing was the first single mass murder event of the CN Holocaust, but it was the beginning of a new phase in the holocaust. CN traditions were taken off the air without regard for the older fans. The cancelation of Cartoon Network Fridays and Toonami were the two biggest events that pissed off older fans before the cancellation of KND and EEnE.
2007 was the worst of the holocaust. In this year CN changed dramatically, and was the worst year for the Network. Robot Tom of Toonami and Tommy and Tara of Fridays faced a grisly death at the hands of dictator Stuart Snyder. As for long Haul, he was the unpaid, unfed, tortured pet of Stuart Snyder until his death. After all of Toonami and Friday's was destroyed, a wave of mass cancellation of shows occurred before a new stage in the holocaust. Some of these shows were Camp Lazlo, The Life and Times of Juniper Lee, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy/Evil Con Carne, and Atomic Betty. All of these shows were killed off without a proper ending.
With Cartoon Network Friday's gone, a new block went on the air. The premiere of Fried Dynamite marked the brainwash era of this holocaust. With the older generation fans completely pissed, the new generation began watching the network. Stuart Snyder took advantage of this new generation, force feeding them live action shows mixed in with animation not even a 5th as good as the older shows. After the new generation was brainwashed and the old cartoon network forgotten, Fried Dynamite was no longer needed and eventually canceled. After the brainwash era, a new era of mindless evil was broadcasted, you may know this as CN Real. CN Real is what became of the network after the brainwash era of mid 2007 to early 2008. 2008 was when CN Real was first announced, but all that was really on was chowder and Jonny Test during early 2008, but by fall, the network was growing increasingly real-action oriented with abominations such as Destroy Build Destroy, Dude What Would Happen, including all the real action bumpers.
A resistance movement was put up with fosters, which died along with its Thanksgiving marathon tradition, Ed Edd'n Eddy, KND, Jonny Bravo, and Robot Boy, but Robot Boy and Jonny Bravo died off, and with the finale of KND, Ed Edd'n Eddy was the last straw. Courage the Cowardly Dog had come back shortly, but gave up long before the EEnE finale. The EEnE finale was the final straw for most older fans. The Resistance movement was gone.
This story is not fan fiction, it is the reality of what has become of good 'ole CN.
If you like my story, read on, but be warned, you may remember how mad you are at the network and get a deep sense of nostalgia.
TO BE CONTINUED…