AN: The Third and final installment of the story of Roy and Erin. If you're new, please check out Redemption and Life Goes On first! If you've stuck with me since the beginning, then thank you for your loyalty and patience! Enjoy!
It's been almost five years since I died.
The afterlife was pretty much what all the stories said it would be: clouds, angels, and everything is bright white. Raziel, who brought me to this place, was my personal angel. Not a guardian angel; it was too late for that. No, Raziel was supposed to guide me and watch over me for the first year of my new… existence. But he worried about me. Even after he was supposed to take a new charge, he refused because I needed watching still. I didn't take too kindly to this place.
He stayed constantly by my side in the beginning because of the traumatic way I had died. Raziel had given me the grand tour saving, in my opinion, the silver lining of the afterlife. He showed me the mirror pools.
He showed me how I see any part of the living world just by thinking of a person or a place and then dipping my index finger into the water-like substance. The process reminded me of Simba from Lion King. Raziel most certainly be my Rafiki.
Since I didn't need to sleep or eat, I spent almost every second at the mirror pools. Others came and went, visiting only occasionally or on specific days, like birthdays or holidays. I was the only one who constantly came to the pools.
"Here again, I see."
I turned away from the scene currently in front of me (Abby going through her morning routine of making coffee) and looked at Raziel.
"You sound so surprised," I said drily.
"Just making a statement." That was Raziel for you. Short sentences and to the point. Raziel walked up to me and put his hand on my shoulder. "The others are worried about you, Erin. They fear that you've seen too much."
I looked away from him and back at the pool. It's true. I had seen a lot these five years.
I had watched Dickie grow up and shed the Robin façade for his new Nightwing persona. I was looking down when Abby graduated from high school (walking alone down the aisle in honor of my memory) and when she and Kaldur had decided to go their separate ways. I felt proud when Wally and Artemis stuck together, retiring from the hero business and going on to college.
The only thing that ever stung when I was looking down in the pool was Roy. He had moved on to Jade, just like I knew he would. Finding out about Lian was hard. I couldn't help but think "that should have been my baby." It was wrong, I know, but Jade had received everything I had ever wanted. My only comfort was the fact that Lian was the motivation Roy needed to get out of his slump and finally find the original Roy.
"You wish to see him, don't you?" Raziel guessed. He seemed to always know when Roy was on my mind.
"I see him every day," I answered coldly.
Raziel sighed. "You died too young. It left you full of longing. I had tried to get the council to allow you to live."
"Well, that obviously didn't work, did it?" I shook my head, "Besides, I thought there was no choice?"
"There is always a choice."
"A choice? I haven't had a choice since the day I met Red Arrow." Raziel didn't get it. He never would. He didn't have the human emotions that plagued me even in death. I sighed. "Raziel, I'm not in the mood for a philosophy debate."
A sad smile flickered on his face for only a second. "Good," he said simply, "because that's not why I'm here. I am here to tell you that you can go back."
I stood up. "Go back?" I asked. "Go back where?"
"To the living world." Raziel put up a hand to stop me when I opened my mouth. "The council has approved your visit. They grant a visit every five years after the person has been deceased. Yours has arrived." Raziel stopped looking at me and stared off into the distance. "The council was hesitant to approve your visit as it would change many things. Things they don't think should be messed with. In the end, they decided it was out of their hands."
My mouth was hanging open and my eyes were threatening tears, if the dead could cry.
"I can go back?"
Raziel nodded. "Yes. Though I don't want you to."
I blinked. "What?"
"I may not have emotion like you, Erin, but I do care for you."
I smiled and did what I had never done before. I hugged Raziel. He gave me a quick squeeze and then pushed me away.
"You can only visit one person," Raziel explained. "You must pick–"
"I already know who." Come on, let me go now! I was getting impatient.
"All right." Raziel took a step towards me, "Keep the one you wish to visit on your mind and in your thoughts," he is always on my mind. "He will not be able to see you until you wish for him to see you, but he will always be able to hear your voice."
"So, is this how ghosts exist?" I asked before the chance was lost.
Raziel nodded. "Goodbye, Erin Sullivan." He placed his index finger on my forehead and my eyes closed.