Hello, everyone! Pilot here. If you're wondering why I'm not posting another chapter to Recovery, it's due to the fact that I simply don't have the motivation to continue that story at the moment. I've realized that I enjoy writing shorter and more focused one-shots than trying to write a multi-chapter story. I apologize if that wasn't what you wanted to hear.
However, I've decided to return with another story about Fang and Lightning. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy XIII.
She watched.
Her eyes reflected the sun that was slowly rising over the distant mountains with her pupils constricting from the sudden onset of light. Their piercing shade of jade had not faded over time.
The morning sun illuminated the woman's face highlighting her wrinkled, bronze skin. Her hair, which was once a deep shade of black, had grayed over the years.
To anyone else, it appeared that this woman was fixated on the beautiful sunrise, but, in reality, her mind was lost in old memories.
"You're a step slow today, Fang."
Fang stood with her knees slightly bent and her hands up to defend her head. She and Lightning had been sparring in Lightning's garage for the majority of the afternoon and things were getting… intense, to say the least. Fang wiped the sweat from her brow.
"We've been going for 4 hours. What do you expect?"
That was Fang's weak attempt at an excuse.
"I thought you Oerbans were supposed to be in good shape. Or was I mistaken?" Lightning held a straight face, but Fang would see the smirk in her eyes.
To be honest, Fang was a step slow, but it had nothing to do with her stamina. Rather, she was distracted by other things… Mostly, Lightning's body. She couldn't take her eyes off of Lightning's athletic frame. Her eyes scanned porcelain skin that covered the powerful muscle underneath.
Fang had always held an attraction towards Lightning, even from the moment they had first met. She also had no reservations in letting Lightning know about it. She flaunted it with the gratuitous confidence that only Fang could exude, but something was different today. But what?
Lightning, taking Fang's extended silence as a cue to continue, quickly closed the distance between the two. With a combination of strength and precision that had been honed through years of training and service with the Guardian Corps, Lightning swept Fang's left leg and took her to the ground. Fang gave a grunt as her back collided with the floor. In one fluid motion, Lightning rolled on top of Fang and positioned herself into a full mount.
"What's up with you today, Fang? I've gotten the better of you before, but it was never this easy." Lightning delivered a light blow to Fang's ribcage that was more teasing in nature than anything.
Fang attempted to produce a witty remark, but verbal communication was currently lost on her. All she could concentration on was Lightning's weight on her hips… and a bead of sweat that was slowly making its way from Lightning's jaw toward her chest. Lightning followed Fang's eyes and quickly realized their primary focus. The faintest of blushes dusted Lightning's cheeks.
A profound silence overcame the two of them. The only sound that could be heard was their slow, heavy breathing.
Fang had made a habit of flirting with Lightning with jabs of sarcasm and innocent touches, but she had never actually made a move due to the ambiguity of Lightning's feelings on the matter. Out of respect, Fang had always resisted the living temptation that was Lightning Farron, but she could feel her restraint slipping with each passing second.
"Fang, I —" started Lightning, but the sentence died in her throat as the Oerban beneath her began to reach up with her right hand. As softly as she could, Fang placed her hand against Lightning's left cheek. Lightning, unsure as to how to act, just continued to look down at Fang.
Then, very slowly, Fang began to trail her index finger along the very same path that was taken by the aforementioned bead of sweat.
Lightning's breath hitched in her throat as Fang's finger traced along her jugular. Fang could feel her heart hammering in her chest and it felt like her head was spinning. Fang could smell the faint scent of vanilla that Lightning was so fond of wearing.
Fang finally met Lightning's gaze. Lightning's pupils were dilating and Fang watched as a hazy look fell over her face. Fang felt the last of her self-restraint fade away.
"You're beautiful."
That was the only thing Fang said before she grabbed Lightning's head and pull her down into their very first kiss.
"Fang?"
Fang jumped slightly as she quickly came back to reality. She turned toward the voice to see a young woman with short, brown hair wearing a white lab coat standing in the doorway of the room. Her name-tag read:
DR. LISA O'DONNELL
PALUMPOLUM REGIONAL HOSPITAL
"Oh, hey, Doc. I'm sorry. I didn't notice you there," Fang said with a small smile.
"It's fine. Are you alright? It looks like you've been crying," inquired Lisa.
"What?" Fang instinctively reached up to her face with her hands where she felt wet tears on her cheeks. "Oh… it's nothing. The sun was bright and made my eyes water a bit." She quickly wiped away the remaining tears with the back of her hand.
"Of course," responded Lisa with an understanding smile. That was something that Fang had always liked about Lisa. She cared, but was never one to pry when it wasn't necessary. "Today is it, isn't it?"
"Yeah. It is. Now or never," said Fang. Now or never. Those words had never been truer in her entire life. "Well, Lightning is waiting for you. Shall I take you to her?" asked Lisa.
"Yeah. Thanks," replied Fang. Lisa made her way over to her, grasped the handles on Fang's wheelchair, and began pushing Fang out the door and down the hallway towards Lightning's room. Fang had boasted a powerful physique in her younger days, but 85 years can wear down the best of us. As much as she hated to admit it, Fang couldn't get around like she used to.
The white hospital walls seemed to stretch endlessly in all directions. They had become hauntingly familiar and they passed by Fang without much consequence. With nothing to occupy her mind, Fang faded back, once more, into her memories.
"Fang, sit down. You're making ME nervous," sighed Vanille as she watched Fang frantically pace back and forth. Vanille could practically see the path that Fang had worn in the carpet. "Sorry," mumbled Fang as she took a seat in a nearby chair. She released an exasperated sigh and ran a shaky hand through her hair.
Vanille couldn't help but smile at Fang's behavior. "Well, you don't get married every day, so I suppose it's understandable."
Fang didn't respond. Instead, she stood back up and began pacing again. No matter how hard she tried, Fang couldn't get herself to sit still. Suddenly, she stopped in her tracks and turned to face Vanille with a slight look of panic. "Do I look okay? I don't look weird, do I?"
"Of course not," replied Vanille as she stood up and made her way over to Fang. "You look very handsome. Now, calm down. Everything is going to be fine." She straightened out Fang's tie and brushed a small piece of lint off of Fang's shoulder.
Fang wore a tailored tuxedo that was all black, save the tie and pocket square which was the same shade of pink as Lightning's hair. Her raven locks were left down at Lightning's request.
"I just can't stand all this waiting around," Fang complained. "It's, quite literally, killing me." She mindlessly pulled at her shirt cuffs. She had never been one to get dressed up.
"I feel like I'm dealing with a little kid," chuckled Vanille as she looked down at her wristwatch. "Luckily for you, it doesn't look like you have to wait much longer. It's almost time." She grabbed Fang's hand and began pulling her outside. "Let's go."
A brisk breeze was blowing as Fang stepped outside. It swept Fang's hair across her face on its endless journey across the world. The late afternoon sun was beginning to dip its toes into the vast ocean that stretched out before them, its reflection dancing across the water's surface. The incoming waves continued their perpetual assault on the shore.
Fang and Lightning had decided to hold their wedding at the end of summer on the beach of New Bodhum with the altar set upon the lonesome pier. The altar had been constructed out of driftwood and painted white and it was currently a beacon beckoning Fang toward her next destination.
Fang walked down the steps of the NORA house and onto the sand. She followed a small path that had been outlined by seashells and smooth stones. Each step kicked up little pieces of sand that were carried off by the wind to settle farther down the shore.
Seats had been placed on both sides of the path and most were already filled with familiar faces. The wedding was a small affair with only family and close friends attending. Vanille took her seat in the front row next to Serah.
Hope Estheim, who had grown much taller over the years, was waiting for her at the altar. When he had heard about Fang and Lightning's engagement, he went and got himself ordained just so he could have the honor of officiating their wedding. It hadn't taken much to convince Fang and Lightning to agree.
"Well, don't you look nice, Fang. Got a hot date or something?" Hope teased when she arrived.
Fang smiled and gave him a playful punch on the shoulder. "Yeah. You could say that." She turned and stared out towards the horizon. The sun was now painting the sky brilliant shades of crimson and pink that always reminded Fang of Lightning.
Behind her, Fang heard a violin begin to play. It was the signal to everyone that Lightning was on her way. "Tell me when she's close," Fang whispered. Hope simply nodded in response. Fang began to pull at her shirt cuffs again. She could hear the small squeaks of excitement from their gathered friends as a few caught sight of Lightning. Fang refused to turn around. She wanted to wait for the perfect moment.
"Fang, she's here."
Fang took a deep breath and slowly turned away from the setting sun and looked toward the end of the path that she had just walked down. Standing there, in a dazzling white gown, was Lightning. Fang's jaw dropped.
The summer sun seemed to reflect off of her in all directions and it felt as though you had to shield your eyes to simply catch a glimpse of her. Her hair was in her usual style, loose and over her left shoulder and she carried a small bouquet of flowers in her hands.
Standing next to her was Sazh who had graciously taken the role of the father figure to do the proverbial hand-off of the bride. Lightning gave the wedding crowd a quick once over as she scanned the small group of smiling faces. Then she directed her attention towards the altar.
Their eyes met.
And in that moment, among their group of friends, it was as if they were the only two people in the entire world. Not a word was said, but so many things were exchanged between the two in just a few brief seconds. Happiness. Anxiousness. Excitement. But most importantly, love.
Lightning smiled.
"We're here."
Lisa's voice brought Fang back to the present. They were currently situated outside room 133. Lightning's room.
"Do you want me to help you inside or are you good by yourself?" asked Lisa.
"I can handle it from here. Thanks for the ride, Doc," replied Fang with a wink.
Lisa gave Fang a small smile and a nod. She turned and began walking towards her own office.
Fang watched her until she was out of sight and then turned back towards the door. With a deep breath, she tried to clear her head. Even after all these years, seeing Lightning still gave her butterflies.
She leaned forward and knocked firmly on the door.
"Come in," answered a soft voice on the other side. With that, Fang turned the knob and pushed the door open.
Lightning was lying in her hospital bed nestled under thick, white blankets. Her hands were clasped together over her stomach and her head was turned slightly to the right to watch Fang as she rolled through the doorway.
Her bed was directly across from the entrance up against the far wall. A small window allowed bits of sunlight to splash across the tile floor.
Like Fang, Lightning's skin had wrinkled with age, but her eyes still shone with the vitality of her youth. Even now, those blue eyes could still pierce into Fang's soul and set her heart aflame. Lightning's hair had grown lighter as she had gotten older, but it was still unmistakably pink. As always, it hung loose over her left shoulder.
Fang closed the door behind her and for a moment, both were quiet. The monotonous beeping of the surrounding medical equipment did little to fill up the silence.
Fang was the first to speak. "Hey there, Sunshine."
"Don't call me that," snapped Lightning, but she was smiling, so the intended effect was lost. "What are you doing all the way over there? Come here," Lightning continued as she gave the space on the bed beside her a light pat.
Fang wheeled herself to Lightning's bedside and immediately took Lightning's hand between her own. Fang began rubbing soft circles on the back of Lightning's hand with her thumb.
"How did you sleep last night?" asked Lightning. She gave Fang's hand a light squeeze.
"Not a wink. Too nervous," Fang confessed as she looked down at their intertwined hands. "And I'm not even the one going under. How about you? Did you get any rest?"
"Not really. All these medications are making me nauseous. Hard to sleep with your stomach constantly turning," Lightning gave a humorless laugh. "I'm just ready to get this over with."
"Yeah."
A year ago, Lightning had begun feeling under the weather. It started with a slight fever and a small cough. Both she and Fang had dismissed it as a common cold, but days eventually turned into weeks and Lightning's health continued to decline at a rapid pace.
Dozens of appointments and a myriad of tests revealed no definitive answer and the line of baffled doctors grew longer and longer with each passing day. Lightning began spending more time in the hospital than she did at home.
Optimism became a scarce resource.
After months of trial and error, it became clear that there were only two options left: make Lightning as comfortable as possible until the… end, or try and extend her life with a high-risk surgery.
Lightning had agreed to the surgery almost immediately.
Fang had initially been against the surgery route. The odds of curing the seemingly unknown ailment were clearly not in Lightning's favor and with her immune system as weak as it was, the doctors said there was a chance that she wouldn't make it through the procedure.
Why do something that could end your life prematurely? Fang couldn't comprehend her rationale. She had never disagreed more with Lightning during their entire relationship. It frustrated Fang that Lightning could make that choice so easily. She felt like Lightning was throwing her life away. That was until Lightning said one simple sentence:
"I've never been a fan of just waiting around."
And with that, Fang understood. Lightning had never been one to go down without a fight.
Whether it be a flan, a behemoth, or even a god, Lightning had always charged in headfirst. To sit back and leave it all to fate just wasn't part of Lightning's nature. She had always been wired differently than others.
So, reluctantly, Fang agreed.
That had been two weeks ago. Since then, they had spent every waking moment in each other's company knowing, full well, that this could be their last few days together. After months of anxiety and uncertainty, the two used this time to indulge in some peace and quiet.
Some days were spent reading books to one another, or reminiscing on stories from their youth, or playing their favorite board games. Other days were spent out in the hospital's flower garden, or watching old movies, or simply holding hands as they watched the sunset.
But those fleeting moments had passed in a flurry. Today was it. There was no going back and both of them knew it. In a few short hours, everything would be different.
"Fang, I promise that we'll see each other again." Fang nodded in response, but continued to look down at their hands. "Fang, look at me. Let me see your face." Fang slowly raised her head and looked at the woman that she loved.
"I promise," Lightning whispered as she stared deep into Fang's eyes. "I promise," she repeated.
As they sat there, holding each other's hands, Fang wished that the moment would last forever. Just the two of them, frozen in time, looking into each other's eyes because, truthfully, Fang couldn't bear to think of what could be after this.
But the moment ended as Dr. O'Donnell opened the door and stepped into the room.
"It's time."
"I guess it is," Lightning said solemnly as she glanced over to the doctor. After giving Lisa a small nod of acknowledgment, Lightning looked back at Fang. She leaned forward until their foreheads touched.
"I love you, Fang."
"I love you, too, Light."
Lightning gave Fang's hand one last squeeze before leaning back and folding her hands across her chest.
Fang backed her wheelchair out of the way as Lisa and a group of nurses came in to prep Lightning for her transfer to the operating room.
"Comfortable, Lightning?" Lisa inquired. Lightning signaled a thumbs up. With that, the group of nurses began to wheel Lightning's bed out of the room. As they approached the door, Lightning turned and gave Fang a fleeting smile.
And then, she was gone.
Fang and Lisa were the only two that remained in the room. Lisa spoke first. "You can wait in here, or I can take you back to your room. Whichever you prefer."
"No matter where I am, I'll just be waiting… but I guess the view is better in my room," Fang responded with a small smile.
"Of course."
When they arrived at Fang's room, she thanked the doctor for the assistance and then made her way over to the window that she had been gazing out of earlier that morning. The world looked much different now than it did at dawn.
The sun had almost reached its apex and not a single cloud was floating in the sky. Fang positioned herself so that the light shone directly upon her. She could feel the sun's warmth on her skin. She wished that Lightning was there to feel it too. Fang sighed.
But even amidst the whirlwind of emotions and the millions of thoughts that raced through Fang's mind, fatigue began to weigh heavy on Fang. She hadn't been exaggerating when she told Lightning that she hadn't slept at all, but now it was all catching up to her.
"Damn it."
Fang fought stubbornly against the grips of sleep for as long as she could, but she was fighting a battle against nature that she was sure to lose. Eventually, she leaned her head against the back of her wheelchair and began to doze.
She had nearly succumbed to unconsciousness when she heard the door open behind her. She lazily lifted her head and turned her chair to see her mysterious guest.
Standing in the doorway was Lightning.
But this wasn't the Lightning that Fang had seen just a few moments ago. No, the Lightning that stood before her now was the Lightning that Fang had fallen in love with so many years ago. Young, confident and, gods, she was beautiful.
"L-light… Wha —" Fang tried to speak, but she simply couldn't piece together a coherent sentence in her brain. Her mind was reeling. She knew this had to be a dream, but why did it feel so real?
Lightning didn't speak as she slowly walked towards Fang. When she was inches away, she stooped down to look directly into Fang's eyes.
Seeing Lightning looking so young and standing so close made Fang feel overwhelmed. Unsure of what to do, she remained as still as possible, barely breathing afraid that she might break the spell if she moved too quickly.
For what felt like a millennia, they simply stared at one another. Fang didn't dare blink, fearful that Lightning would be gone when she opened her eyes again.
Tempted to speak, Fang drew in a breath, but stopped short when Lightning began to reach toward her with her right hand. Fang felt Lightning place her hand on her left cheek. Fang leaned into it. Lightning gently caressed her cheek bone with her thumb.
Lightning's eyes seemed to scan Fang's entire face as if desperate to memorize every little detail. Fang thought she smelled the subtle scent of vanilla…
"You're beautiful."
That was the only thing Lightning said before she pulled Fang forward for the very last kiss.
Fang closed her eyes. The kiss was gentle, but Fang could feel a multitude of emotions simmering beneath the surface. Sadness. Relief. Pain. Hope. Fang was being bombarded by so many different feelings that her brain couldn't keep up.
And then it was over. Fang felt the pressure vanish from her lips. She opened her eyes to see Lightning looking back at her. Their eyes met for a brief moment before Lightning stood up and turned to walk back towards the doorway.
Lightning grabbed the doorknob and began to leave when she stopped and looked back over her shoulder. She gave Fang one final smile. Then she closed the door with a click.
Fang awoke with a start. She quickly glanced around her and found that she was completely alone. Her room was no longer full of light as the sun had descended toward the western horizon. It appeared that a few hours had passed.
Oddly, Fang wasn't surprised that she was alone. She was strangely at peace with the whole situation in spite of the experience that she just had. The moment that Lightning appeared, Fang had understood what it meant, even if only subconsciously.
She was saying goodbye.
"Damn you, Light," whispered Fang as she put her head in her hands. "At least you kept your promise to see me again." There was no use in getting upset. They both knew the risk. They both knew what could happen.
There was a soft knock at the door.
"Come in."
Lisa stepped into the room and closed the door softly behind her. It was clear that she was uncomfortable and she was wearing the face of someone with the burden of bad news.
"Fang, I'm so —," started Lisa, but Fang interrupted her.
"She's gone, isn't she?"
"Y—yes. We lost her during the procedure. I—I'm so sorry, Fang," stammered Lisa. She hung her head.
"We knew this could happen. Thanks for doing everything that you could. I mean that," Fang said reassuringly. "Can you take me to her? I want to see her."
"O—of course." Lisa walked around to begin pushing Fang out of the room. Fang reached out and took hold of her hand.
"Doc, seriously. Thank you for all that you've done. We knew the risk from the start and I know that you did everything in your power to help Lightning," Fang said as she gave Lisa's hand a squeeze.
Lisa gave Fang a small smile before pushing Fang out of the room. Their route took them down the hallway they had traversed earlier this morning, but this time Lisa took a left at a four-way intersection toward the post-operating recovery rooms.
Lisa stopped at the first room and held the door open as Fang wheeled herself in.
"Take as long as you need," Lisa said before she quietly closed the door.
Lightning was lying in her bed, her position identical to how she was when Fang saw her in the morning except this time her eyes were closed. She looked to be sleeping peacefully. Fang slowly wheeled herself to Lightning's bedside and took her hand.
It was still warm.
Fang gave each fingertip a gentle kiss. After watching Lightning suffer through months of agony and stress, the peaceful expression that was on Lightning's face gave her relief. Lightning could finally rest.
"Lightning, I don't think I could ever say this enough, but I love you." It was as a seal had broken and words began to pour out of Fang's mouth. "I'll never forget the first time I saw you. The way you talked. The way you laughed. The way you fought."
Emotions were welling up from deep within and Fang didn't attempt to hold them back.
"The fact that you fell in love with me, me of all people, makes me the luckiest woman in the world. Lady Luck must have been looking over my shoulder." Fang chuckled softly to herself.
"You're the strongest person I've ever known. I love you."
Fang leaned forward and lay her head on top of their intertwined hands. She took a deep breath and indulged in Lightning's sweet vanilla fragrance for the final time.
"But I know how much you hate waiting around…"
Fang closed her eyes.
A few hours later, Fang was found, still at Lightning's bedside with their hands beneath her head. Sometime within those few hours, she had passed on in her sleep unwilling to remain in a world without Lightning. A world without her.
She had a smile on her face, as if eager to see her lover on the other side.
AN: Thanks so much for reading Always. It has been a while since I've attempted at writing a story and, honestly, I felt a little rusty. I'm not completely satisfied with what I've produced here, but rather than putting myself through the hell known as "OVER-ANALYZING EVERYTHING," I decided to put it up and let y'all see it.
I was inspired to write this after realizing that there isn't a great deal of fanfic that talks about what love looks like for our favorite characters at the very end. What emotions that situation can invoke and how one might rationalize with said emotions. I tried my best to convey how I perceive Lightning and Fang's relationship and how I believe that their love would be strong enough to see them through the finality of death and, possibly, even beyond.
PS - If you're wondering, I was inspired by some plot points from the anime Your Lie in April and the movie The Notebook.
- Pilot