A Jedi Gift Exchange.
A Star Wars: The Clone Wars fan fiction.
By Count Mallet.
Anakin and Ahsoka had a rare block of downtime at the Jedi Temple. Anakin gave his Padawan an assignment of researching human cultures in different worlds and galaxies as relating to different species and their customs was important as a Jedi Knight.
"Hey, master, come look at this." Ahsoka said enthusiastically. She showed Anakin the latest information she had found on the HoloNet. "It says here that in this galaxy called the Milky Way, some humans exchange presents near the end of the year."
"Good job, Snips." Anakin said, praising his Padawan. "See, I told you research could be fun – and it's not nearly as dangerous as fighting battle droids." Ahsoka could only roll her eyes as she actually wished she was fighting battle droids as opposed to looking up information on the HoloNet. However, she did appreciate what her master was trying to teach her.
"Master?" Ahsoka asked. "Seeing how it's near the end of our Standard Year, could we do a gift exchange here at the temple?"
Anakin pondered for a minute, and finally responded, "You know, that would be a great way to show what you've learned. I'll see who is all available and you can make the arrangements."
Later that same day, the group who decided to join in the festivities all assembled in a dining hall. Anakin and Ahsoka were there, along with Luminara Unduli, Barriss Offee, Shaak Ti, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Plo Koon, Mace Windu, and Grand Master Yoda. As each person arrived, they received a card with a number of open circles on it from Ahsoka. Per Ahsoka's request, each had brought a wrapped present and placed it on a table off to the side. There was a variety of items all wrapped; some were small and thin, others were wide and tall, and one item was noticeably bigger than all the others.
"Here, why are we, Padawan Tano?" Yoda inquired.
"Today, I learned that some humans exchange gifts at the end of the year. So, we are going to do something similar." Ahsoka said, with a hint of pride in her voice. We are going to take turns spinning this dial and whatever color is pointed to, you fill in the proper circle on your card. When you fill in six in a row, left to right, say 'Jedi' to indicate you have six in a row. After that, you can either take a gift from the table if you don't have one yet, or you may trade your gift with one remaining on the table or trade gifts with someone else."
"But what if we don't want to exchange with the other person, Little 'Soka?" Plo asked.
"The rules say if someone wants to trade, you have to." Ahsoka replied. "And after the first person completes five rows across, the game ends and everyone opens their gift to see what they end up with."
"Very interesting," Mace mused. "But what if we don't like what we end up with?"
Ahsoka responded, "That's part of the fun, what you end up with is your gift." She grinned a bit as she added "And no givsies-backsies."
Ahsoka begun the game portion of the gift exchange as she spun the dial and it landed on orange. She filled in the first circle for orange on her card and passed the dial to Anakin. His spin ended on green. The process continued for a few minutes when Shaak Ti said "Jedi" somewhat hesitantly, as if she wasn't sure if she was doing the right thing.
"Congratulations, Master Ti." Ahsoka said. "Now you can go and select a gift."
Shaak looked at the assortment of wrapped packages carefully. She chose what looked like a medium-sized cube in red and green wrapping paper.
As the game continued everyone but Anakin had a gift. After Yoda's most-recent spin, he stated, "Jedi, I have." He then walked over to Obi-Wan, who currently had the largest gift – which had candy and a small note taped to the outside. "Trade, I wish to do, Master Kenobi." Obi-Wan appeared to pout a little as Yoda flipped his small thin gift on the table by Obi-Wan and snatched his former gift away with the Force, taking it back to his chair.
As the game continued and our participants traded gifts back and forth, Padmé Amidala walked in.
"Greetings, Master Jedi," Padmé said. "What are you doing?"
"Join us you should," Master Yoda replied, "Exchanging gifts, we are."
Anakin took it upon himself to explain this new game and gift exchange. For some odd reason, there was an extra gift on the table, so Padmé accepted the invitation and eventually ended up with a mystery gift of her own.
After several more gift exchanges (many of which involved the largest one changing hands time and time again), Barriss exclaimed "Jedi! And this is my fifth one."
"Okay, Barriss," Ahsoka said. "Feel free to exchange gifts if you want, but this is it. We all get to open our gifts up and see what we have." Barriss mused for a bit and went over to Anakin,who currently had the largest one. She traded her thin rectangular gift for his. "So much for not giving into one's desires." Luminara mumbled, a bit disappointed at her Padawan's impulsive decision.
Ahsoka decided to open her gift first since the idea was hers to begin with. As she removed the wrapping, her expression changed as she exclaimed "What am I supposed to do with this shampoo? I don't even have hair!"
"Couldn't you use it on your lekku, Ahsoka?" Barriss asked.
"I guess," Ahsoka said, somewhat dejected. Or maybe you could take … ow!" Ahsoka was interruped by Yoda, who had whacked her ankle with his gimer stick.
"Givsies-backsies, there are none, Padawan Tano." Yoda reminded her.
"Okay. Never mind, Barriss." Ahsoka said as she thought "I'm gonna need to go to the Halls of Healing for my ankle, assuming I can still walk!"
Anakin opened his gift next. He, too, had a confused look on his face. "What to Expect When You're Expecting?! What am I supposed to do with this?"
"Gee, Anakin," Obi-Wan said, "Are you trying to tell us something?" Padmé looked on, trying to keep from giggling.
"Master, it's not even possible for me to have children. And isn't that like against the Jedi Code or something?"
Obi-Wan opened his next. He looked at his waffle iron curiously, trying to figure out what it was for.
"Look at this cool pattern. I wonder if you can put the shape of the Jedi insignia in it and use it to emboss stuff?"
"Obi-Wan," Mace interrupted, "That is for making waffles for breakfast, not making fancy designs."
"Oh," Obi-Wan replied, somewhat dejectedly.
The remaining Jedi opened their gifts in order. Luminara Unduli ended up with a shaving kit. Shaak Ti opened her gift to reveal a hairdryer. Plo Koon opened his gift, revealing a spill-proof travel mug. Mace Windu was a bit unhappy when his present turned out to be hair gel and clippers.
The last three people were ready to open their gifts. Padmé exclaimed "Eww!" when her gift turned out to be Nerf cologne for men. "I don't want to smell like one of those icky creatures!"
"Would you like it better if I wore it, Senator," Anakin asked Padmé playfully, before realizing everyone was looking at him suspiciously. "What?" he replied, "I'm only asking!"
Yoda opened his present next. It was a Jedi robe with stars all over it, but many sizes too large for his diminutive body.
"Master Plo, this might fit … oof!" Yoda was interrupted as he was pushed back several feet by an unexpected Force push.
"No givsies-backsies, Master Yoda," Anakin said, trying to hide the fact he had Force pushed Yoda so to avenge Yoda's whacking his Padawan's ankle earlier.
The only person to yet open her present was Barriss. All eyes were upon her as she first removed the card from the large box, saying she'd read it in a moment. She carefully removed the candy from the wrapping paper and opened the gift and the box inside to reveal a smaller box. She looked at it suspiciously as she opened this second box to find old paper and what smelled like garbage.
"Eww!" Barriss exclaimed. "Who would give garbage as a gift?"
"Lessons for you, there are, Padawan Offee." Yoda replied, having returned to his chair and dusted himself off. "Size matters not, and nothing but trouble, greediness causes."
"I guess your right, Master Yoda," Barriss replied. She then apologized to Luminara for letting her emotion get the best of her.
All of a sudden, the weirdness of this whole gift exchange was interrupted by Ahsoka.
"Umm, Master Ti, why are you trying to hide from me?" Ahsoka asked.
Shaak Ti's black lekku stripes seemed to darken a bit, suggesting embarrassment. "Well, Padawan, it's just that the last time you and I were together, you played a rather immature prank on me, and I really don't want Master Plo kicking me again."
"I don't remember doing that," Ahsoka replied, slightly emphatically, revealing why her master regularly referred to her as "Snips."
"Well, you were five years old at the time, so maybe you've forgotten. But my rear lekku was sore for two days afterward, so it's hard for me not to forget."
"Sorry," Ahsoka said, as her lekku stripes darkened now, as she was a bit embarrassed about what she supposedly did many years ago.
At that, everyone left and returned to their quarters, commenting about all the crazy gifts everyone received. Ahsoka stopped at the Halls of Healing to have her ankle looked at. It was not broken, but just sore until a healer treated it and told Ahsoka to keep it wrapped for the next 24 hours.
Back in her shared quarters with Anakin, Ahsoka sat on her bed, looking disappointed.
"What's wrong, Snips?" Anakin asked.
"This didn't turn out the way I wanted, Master." Ahsoka replied. "I was hoping everyone would exchange nice gifts, but it seems like all they did was use this opportunity to prank each other with silly gifts."
"I was saving this for our upcoming holiday celebration, Ahsoka," Anakin replied as he handed her a rectangular package, "But it looks like you should have it now to help cheer you up."
Ahsoka opened the package to find the sparkly blue dress she had been wanting ever since her last shopping trip. While she wasn't sure how Anakin knew her exact size, she was definitely pleased.
"Thank you, Master!" she exclaimed, giving him a friendly embrace.
"You're welcome." Anakin replied.
"Umm, Master," Ahsoka, said. "I have someone else I need to give a gift to. May I be excused to do that?"
"Of course, Snips. Just be back before lights out." Anakin responded.
A few minutes later, Shaak Ti heard someone requesting entry to her chambers. "Enter," she stated. She was surprised to Ahsoka standing there with a package.
"What can I do for you, Padawan Tano?" Shaak asked.
"Umm, Master Ti. First, I want to apologize. I really don't remember doing that thing when I was five, but I'm sorry you got hurt."
"Think nothing of it, Ahsoka," Shaak said gently as she blinked her black eyes. "If anything I should apologize for not letting go of the incident as I should have. Let's think nothing more of it and move forward like any Jedi should." Ahsoka nodded.
"Master, I have a gift for you, to make up for tonight's silliness." Ahsoka added.
Shaak Ti opened the package and noticed it was polish for her headdress to keep the teeth and gemstones as shiny as they were the day she first crafted her headdress.
"Thank you, Ahsoka," Shaak said as she bowed slightly, "You really put some thought into this. I appreciate that."
Ahsoka bowed in return, simply saying "Thank you."
Shaak then asked « Do you still know our tongue? » in Togruti, surprising Ahsoka.
« Yes, Master, but I really don't get to speak it since I've never been to Shili since coming to the Temple. » was Ahsoka's response.
Shaak smiled, pleased that the teen Togruta still knew her native language well. "I'm glad to see you still embrace your culture, even if you haven't had the chance to better embrace it." she added.
Ahsoka noticed the time on her commlink and then said "I have to go now. It's almost time for lights out and you know how my master freaks out if I'm not on time." All Shaak Ti could do was nod as Anakin's personality was well-known by all the senior Jedi.
Ahsoka returned to her quarters. Anakin asked her, "Well, what did you think of today?"
Ahsoka looked at him, saying "Well, if I ever do a gift exchange again, I'm going to tell everyone 'No gag gifts allowed.'"
Anakin smiled and said "Well, I'm still proud of your research and your initiative, even if your little gift exchange didn't go as planned." With that, he stepped in the refresher to change for the night.
As Ahsoka quickly changed for the night while he was out of sight, she had a thought. "Umm, Master," she called out, "What will you do with that book?"
Anakin opened the refresher door and came out. "I guess I'll think about what it would be like if life was different and I had a family of my own, I suppose." was his reply. "Goodnight, Snips." he added as he climbed into bed and rolled over.
"Good night, Skyguy." Ahsoka said with a big grin, as the thought of Anakin with kids struck her funny. ▄
Disclaimer: Lucasfilm Limited owns all Star Wars references and concepts.
Commentary: Part of this was indirectly inspired by BlueSaber3's "A Not So Normal ..." series, so props are in order there for the inspiration. The actual gift exchange, however, was based on something my 6th grade class did right before Christmas break that year (I went to a Parochial Grade School in case you're wondering why we did something for Christmas). We were actually asked to bring gag gifts into class and did an exchange somewhat similar to that in this story. Sadly, I forgot what game we used to determine who got to select/trade gifts. As an example of the gag gifts that people brought, I had brought in the top off of a can of potato chips and an old watch band (without the watch it came with since it that part had broke and was discarded by then). Yes, there was a big gift in the pile of our gifts and something told me it wasn't as nice inside as the wrapping paper and items suggested. I still recall how many of my class wanted that big box, presumably thinking something good was inside. I don't remember for sure what was actually inside, but I swear it smelled bad after it was opened, and my other classmates all laughed at the poor person who made all the effort to have that particular gift and come up relatively empty handed.
So, here is my holiday-themed story. Merry Christmas to all and season's greetings to those who celebrate other holidays.