09/10/2011 20:11:00

Set a few days after the Emmy's in Lea's apartment.

How did every day come to start with a struggle?

Lea's mind seemed to whisper groggily as it took a grand effort just to open her eyes. Her otherwise quiet thoughts required a second to rearrange into something coherent, and she took the blissful absence of thought to carefully wipe away sleep from her eyes.

Then, all at once, everything hit her as softly and slowly as a ton of bricks. For one ridiculous second she could have sworn she heard her skull break with effort before realizing it was simply her wrist cracking as she tried to wring awake her limbs. She was spent.

And not in a good way.

Well… not completely, at least.

Allowing the tiniest of groans to resonate from her throat, Lea proceeded to put together the first string of complaints she would come to face today. Had it seriously been just a week ago she was in a happy relationship? Had been guilt-free, despite feeling just the tiniest bit incomplete?

She felt a miniscule twitch from somewhere around her stomach, as if the skin was being lightly tickled and she could sense it jump.

How was she expected to face today, when she wasn't even prepared to face last night? Of course, it was her fault. She brought the shame and regret upon herself, but she'd never before felt the guilt.

There was going to be fighting today, as if she hadn't had enough of that.

She felt the same odd touch grace her stomach and her eyes snapped fully open, abandoning all leftover laziness.

A touch?

That was definitely a touch that she felt.

Suddenly – more bricks – she felt the body next to her shift, shuffling closer and tightening the heavy set of arms around her. Her mind naturally breathed "Theo," a habit. But these arms were different.

Yes, these arms were warmer, and softer, but scratchier at the same time – she could feel the hair on the forearm tickling her stomach and explaining the strange touch she felt.

These arms felt very, very, wrong.

Her whole body gave a swift jump as she heard a voice, rough with sleep, whispering.
"Good Morning, Lee."
Oh god, she could feel it. Feel the breath on her neck, feel the vibrations of the deep voice echoing through her. It made her feel nauseous with guilt.

It had only been a week since her break-up with Theo, and here she was, feeling Darren's pride-filled voice humming through her.

"L-l-l…" she stuttered. Had he just called her Lee?

He mistook her shock and confusion for tiredness, and smiled against her neck. She swore she could hear it.

"L-leave," she commanded in a hoarse voice. She hadn't cheated, obviously, but the guilt surging through her let her know something was wrong. Serious relationships were the only relationships she ever got into. And even after being broken up with Theo for a week, she felt like she had broken some unspoken rule of being in a relationship even after it's ended.

"Hmm…?" Darren murmured, his hot breath once again tickling her neck and hairline, and she shivered.

"You have to go," Lea tried her best to speak firmly, but her voice ended up rising at the end, as if a question.

"Not until later," he smiled against her skin and she could feel his lips stretching. Clearly he had taken it as question, too.

"Leave, Darren."

"What…?" he caught on, "I thought we were-"

Friends? Lovers? Lea failed to see them as anything except for two people who just had sex. But still, she denied it all.

"We aren't. Go."

She felt his arms slide off of her with a sigh as he got off the bed, and she clenched her jaw as she was hit with the unexpected chill of his absence.

Darren slid his pants on over his boxers and hastily threw on his shirt, too dazed to care that it was horribly wrinkled, not to mention inside-out. He swallowed and was sure she must've heard it.

"C-can I call you?"

"It's Monday," she stated, somehow using it as an answer.

"Right, right.." he humoured her sensibly, and pretended to understand, silently allowing his hopes to climb just a little as she hadn't given him a 'no.'

Lea stayed curled into the same position, lying on her side with one arm tucked under the pillow, and the other gently resting atop the tangled mass of sheets, all the blankets had been kicked down to her feet. Despite the circumstances, Darren took a second to admire her. As if she could feel his eyes glowing into her, she stiffened and pulled the sheets over herself as he snapped back into reality.

This had been a one-night thing. For Lea, it was an opportunity to help get over Theo and relieve some pent-up sexual frustration, and for Darren it was just the luckiest night of his life.

"Darren," he jumped as she said his name, "p-please."

Her voice was quiet and unsure, and as much as he could hear it and hear her hurt – as much as he wanted to stay and comfort and help her, he abided with a sigh.

"… Thank you for having me," he responded awkwardly before sweeping out.

Lea stayed like that for a long time, trying to figure out if she hated herself for what she did with Darren, or hated herself for getting something far beyond simple satisfaction for it.