Chapter 1: Part I
Chapter Text
Bruce Wayne
I used to believe the worst thing that ever happened to me was losing my parents. That it was the worst pain I'd ever feel for the rest of my life. So driven by their untimely and merciless departure that cut me so deep in a way I thought I would never recover. I imagined I was so broken back then I could never again be whole. So swallowed up by the cruelness of the world. I had no idea what real evil there was. I was foolish then.
Foolish, because I used to think I knew pain... until The Doctor told me Selina tried to kill herself, and it was in that second I realized hearing thoes words was real pain. That was the worst pain I'd ever feel without having to experiencing it. Yet, the blow to my stomach was too deep for me to take that I couldn't break. I couldn't even fathom the idea of imagination in my mind. Knowing then how losing both my Mother and Father was nothing compared to what I had yet to lose. What I had gained in their absence. My best friend.
... who scremed as I ran desperatly to her. Thinking all she was... was pain. Racked from head to toe, no sedatives or soothing. Just cutting pain from sharp objecta ans harsh words. Nothing but pain. Yet, not the kind of pain I could see. Not the pain I could hear in her voice through the incomplete sentences: "I have no reason..." and "I can't..." Pain I did not understand the full meaning of being drowned out by drugs and vunerability. Pain I felt crushing over me from someone who could no longer hold themselves up as they had done for years. The Pain was buckling my knees beneath the pair of us while the staff tried to ease her. I was so ignorant to the shaking reality of her pain. To think, deep down in my own trembling chest... that if no one had been there during her time of need, in the second she was alone... if no one had been there in time to stop her just a single second before... her pain would be greasing the tiles and smearing the floor. Blood everywhere. A river washing along my feet. I'd be stepping in it before I'd even realize. On my knees, I'd be soaking it up. Touching my skin through my clothes, I'd be trying to clean it up. Save her. But it's streaking against my hands, now up to my elbows. Selina is covered, dead weight in my arms... I can see all of it and it makes me sick.
All my fault. Another to add to my collection of nightmares. Thoes same beautiful eyes I've loved for years look up at me, just for only a second longer.
"She tried to kill herself."
I can't even find words to say, but I touch her as thought it might be out last and if there is even a chance she can feel me I want the thing she feels to be love. I touch her and know, vowthat I will do absolutley anything and everything to ease her of pain. To do for her what I wish could have been done for me. I think about Selina and how I have gone many years without my parents, yet I could never imagine one without her.