Author's Notes:
Before you read on I recommend reading the first Happy Valentine's Day Trilogy. It's in three parts as this one will be. Only the first trilogy is entirely from Janet's POV. The second trilogy will be from Jacob's POV. Other than that, I hope you enjoy it.
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A month had passed since the near fiasco on Labor Day. During that month Jacob's life changed dramatically. First his 'top-secret' affair with Janet was out in the open, much to his relief. He and Selmak had hated sneaking around and lying to their family and friends. And they had hated having to hide their love for such a wonderful woman, especially when they were in the same room with her and couldn't be near her for fear others would see their affection for her.
Second, and much to his surprise, Jacob found out he was going to be a father…again! He'd be the first to admit that he wasn't prepared for such a thing to happen. Not that he'd have to admit anything. His pure shock upon hearing the news was obvious as he started choking on his food in front of his family and friends.
Never mind that he never thought he'd be a father again at his age. He just never expected Cassie to blurt out that Janet was pregnant the way she did. Jacob always believed that a man deserved to hear such particularly delicate and intimate news from the woman who was actually carrying the child.
None the less, it presented Jacob with an opportunity he couldn't refuse. He and Selmak were just so thrilled that Janet liked the engagement ring and said yes to his proposal of marriage. He didn't think things could get any better until he and Janet saw the test result from the lab confirming they were indeed pregnant. Then the totality of the situation sank in and he was beyond ecstatic.
The woman he loved more than life itself was pregnant with his child. He had forgotten how wonderful a feeling that was to carry within him. It was something Selmak never experienced and he was feeling things any first time father would be. Some nights Jacob couldn't sleep because Selmak was so excited and couldn't wait for the baby to be born. Other nights, Jacob couldn't sleep because Selmak worried so much about Janet and the baby. But most of the time, because Jacob and Selmak's feelings were so intertwined Jacob often felt overloaded with pure happiness.
During one such giddy moment, Jacob had decided that he and Janet should get married on Valentine's Day. The idea had just popped in his head that morning while making breakfast. Selmak agreed that it was a wonderful idea. Jacob had been so excited that he ran upstairs to tell Janet, forgetting about the bacon, which burned to a crisp and nearly started a grease fire in the kitchen.
Of course, she was a little worried about the chosen date since she'd be about five months pregnant on her wedding day. It took Jacob and Selmak an hour to convince her that they didn't care one bit how far her pregnancy would be because they loved her so much. What convinced her was how proud Jacob would be of her during that moment. Ok, so what he really said was that he wanted to proudly show her and the baby bump on her belly off to all his family and friends and that it would be huge boost for his ego.
Then on that same day, Jacob and Selmak hit a real emotional low period. Jacob got a call from the Joint Chiefs to report immediately for his debriefing in Washington D.C. It wasn't the actual call nor was it the stress and length of the interrogations that troubled him. It was the stress the entire situation put on Janet.
She was worried about him and Selmak. She was concerned about the future of Jacob's career in the Air Force because he had essentially abandoned his post as liaison to the Tok'ra. Plus, she was fearful that Selmak might be subjected to some kind of medical experiments. But most of all, she was apprehensive that if Jacob was court-martialed he'd end up in jail and she would be alone with the baby.
The idea of being separated from each other did scare Jacob as well. That was why he didn't argue with Janet when she was adamant about going to Washington with him. It could have been their last time with each other. He just hated seeing the worried look on her face each night he and Selmak returned to their hotel room. The last thing they wanted was for anything to happen to her or the baby.
All the worrying was for naught. Once he had been fully debriefed and explained about the assassination attempt on Selmak's life that nearly killed them both and was the reason why they fled to Earth, Jacob found himself back at the SGC and still an Air Force officer. Thanks to some friends in high places, he and Selmak worked as highly paid consultants heading out with SG teams once or twice a week giving him more than enough time to be there for his family whenever needed.
His life had reached an unbelievable high and as far as Jacob knew the worst was behind him.
He was engaged to a wonderful woman with a baby on the way. Through the marriage he would gain a bright and charming young daughter in Cassie, who was very much looking forward to becoming Sam's sister. He was working with good friends and even his daughter on a regular basis. Plus, the job itself was perfect for both him and Selmak since both of them liked getting into the action. Jacob was never a desk jockey and Selmak was a resistance fighter who rarely had a dull day during his two thousand years. Since being blended with Selmak, retirement wasn't even in Jacob's vocabulary anymore.
Yes, Jacob couldn't be happier during this moment. So much so that he sometimes couldn't stop from smiling.
"You know Jacob, you keep smiling like that and you'll ruin your reputation as a hard ass in the Air Force," Jack remarked as they walked through a meadow.
"I guess I'll just have to live with it then," Jacob smiled right back at him. "Besides, nothing can bring me down right now. Forgive me for saying this Sammy but I'm looking forward to being a father and a husband again so that I can do things better this time around."
"No apologies, Dad. I don't have anything to complain about," she smiled sincerely. "It's nice to see you so happy."
"Yeah, about that…Janet needs to be pregnant as often as possible!" Jack commented. "You and Selmak haven't been so grouchy since we all found out about the baby."
Jacob let out a hearty laugh. They all did. It seemed to be happening quite a bit lately; the group being in such high spirits. Sam was already family but of now Jack, Daniel and Teal'c had become extended family. They nearly got together every weekend for barbeques, dinner, or movie nights with pizza. They were often together in the commissary at breakfast, lunch or dinner during their down time. Jack and Sam were even planning a baby shower for Janet.
"So, you and Janet come up with names yet?" Sam asked.
"Nothing definite yet. I'm sure when it's closer to the baby being born we'll have an idea."
"Jack would be a good name," Jack smirked, making Jacob roll his eyes.
"Or Daniel," Daniel added, trying to hide that smartass grin on his face. "Even Teal'c."
"Uh…no," Jacob firmly said. "Janet and I have the baby naming under control. And besides, one Jack is more than enough to deal with!"
That earned a laugh from everyone. Even Selmak was chuckling within.
"SG-1…this is Hammond, come in please!" George's brusque voice sounded from their radios interrupting their laughter.
Instantly, their laughter stopped as they knew when it was time to be jovial and a time to be serious. From the tone in George's voice, Jacob knew this was serious.
"Bit early for our radio check-in, isn't it?" Jacob quietly asked Sam.
She glanced at her watch and nodded.
"This is O'Neill," Jack replied into his radio, bringing the team to a stop.
"I need you and your team to return to Earth immediately."
"Can I ask why? We haven't even reached the ruins, Sir."
"I'll explain when you get back. Hammond out."
And like that their radios were silent.
"Ok kids. You heard the man. Let's head back," Jack ordered, leading them back the way they came.
Jacob was quiet while he listened to the others discussing the possible option that they might be needed to save the universe yet again. To be honest, he didn't care why they were being recalled. To him it meant he might get a chance to call Janet and chat with her for a few minutes if only to hear her voice.
Heaven help him. He hadn't heard her voice or felt her touch for six hours and he felt like a love starved teenager. He couldn't help it. Janet was pregnant and glowing. Her joy about the baby was infectious to those around her. From experience he knew everyday wasn't always full of sunshine and giggles. He and Selmak just planned to ride this wave of happiness for as long as possible.
"So…Jacob, what's Selmak think about becoming a father?" Daniel asked as they reached the DHD.
'May I?' Selmak requested.
'Go ahead,' Jacob replied, relinquishing control to his symbiote.
"I have never felt such excitement from a host during my two thousand years. I am looking forward to this baby as much as Jacob is," Selmak smiled then quickly relinquished control back to Jacob.
"Really, Jacob…excited? Two words I never thought could be in the same sentence," Jack teased.
"I keep my excitement all on the inside," Jacob countered.
"Pffft, not all of it Dad," Sam smirked. "That grin has been plastered on your face since you found out Janet was pregnant."
Jacob shrugged his shoulders, his smile widened. He couldn't help it. There were moments when his thoughts lingered on Janet and the baby and his joy simply couldn't be contained. And his mind had been consumed lately with thoughts of Janet, of the baby, of how he wanted to do everything better this time around.
In fact, Jacob knew things would be better this time because Selmak was there to keep him in line. No chance of ever forgetting a Birthday, an Anniversary, and no way what so ever of forgetting to or being late to pick up a loved one.
'That reminds me…Jacob, you need to buy some ice-cream on the way home.'
'Selmak, you didn't eat it all!'
'Sorry, when I worry I eat. Ice-cream always makes me feel better.'
'For our sake, I hope Janet doesn't have a craving for ice-cream until after we get home!'
The gate suddenly kawooshed, drawing Jacob from his internal dialog with Selmak. He watched as Sam sent their iris deactivation code then followed the others after they stepped through the event horizon. Their joyous mood was instantly gone the moment they saw George's somber face. Jacob had seen that look on his friend's face a number of times through the years.
It was never a good sign.
And like the others, Jacob assumed from that look something had happened amongst the system lords which in turn would directly affect Earth. Only when George didn't answer Jack's question right away and his eyes locked onto Jacob's, Jacob's stomach dropped to his ankles.
'Oh…God…not my son,' he thought, instantly receiving emotional support from Selmak.
"Jacob, will you come with me please?" George requested, his eyes not meandering onto the others.
Jacob nodded and did as he was asked. His chest was getting tighter and breathing became more difficult with each step as he followed George into the hallway where they could be alone.
"Jacob…I'm so sorry," George spoke softly, his hand resting on Jacob's shoulder. Jacob held his breath preparing for the bad news. "I recalled you the moment I got word. Jacob…Janet had a miscarriage…she lost the baby."
"No," Jacob gasped, falling back a step putting his hand up against the wall to steady himself. His grief felt as equally as Selmak's. Tears filled his eyes as he couldn't contain both his and Selmak's sorrow. Only one thing was on their minds. Jacob cleared his throat. "Where's Janet? I…we…Selmak and I need to be with her."
"I have a car ready on the surface. It will take you to the hospital. She's on the fourth floor, room 405. Give me your gear."
Jacob numbly removed his weapons and field vest. He noticed the worried faces of Sam and the others a short distance behind George.
"Can you…can you tell the others for me?" Jacob asked as he handed his gear to George. "I…I just can't right now."
"Go, I'll take care of everything," George said, signaling an Airman over. "You and Janet…take as much time as you need."
"Thank you George," Jacob replied then followed his escort.
Selmak helped moved Jacob along, enough to get them to the car. The Airman escort was quiet and respectful opening the car door for Jacob and closing once he was inside. At the hospital, the Airman quickly stepped around and opened the passenger door for Jacob. Again, Selmak helped Jacob to get moving.
"I'm to wait here for you, Sir," the young Airman said after Jacob got to his feet.
"That won't be necessary, son. If Hammond gives you any grief just tell him Jake said you were dismissed."
"Yes, Sir."
At the elevator, Jacob's hand shook uncontrollably as he pushed the button. He couldn't stop it nor could he even stop his tears. He had experienced the loss of a spouse but nothing like this. He wasn't expecting anything like this. He didn't even know what to do.
What he did know was that Janet was most assuredly devastated. She was so looking forward to this baby. She talked about it constantly. She even talked to the baby on a regular basis. Jacob enjoyed seeing her smile because of the life she had carried within her.
Now…now that joy was gone.
'Sel…what do we do?' he asked.
'Be there for her any way we can. Give her our love. It's all we can do.'
Jacob nodded, wiping his tears away. He pushed the call button again. The elevator wasn't moving fast enough so Jacob hurried up the stairs. His need to be with Janet became more and more desperate. He and Selmak didn't want her to be alone a moment longer than necessary. When he came flying out of the stairwell on the fourth floor he was almost frantic in his search for room 405.
"General Carter!"
Jacob turned around and hurried to Dr. Warner who was near room 405.
"How is she?" Jacob quickly asked.
"She's stable and in no danger."
"How…how did this happen? Did I do something wrong? Should she have rested more? Shoul…"
"General Carter…Jacob, these things happen," Warner replied calmly and reassuringly. "You can't second guess yourself. You and Janet were doing everything you could to bring a healthy baby into this world. This time it just wasn't meant to be. But on the bright side, Janet is a very healthy woman. I can see no reason why she can't become pregnant again."
Jacob closed his eyes for a moment. The mere thought of what was going through Janet's mind was gut wrenching.
"Can I see her?" Jacob asked, feeling his throat tighten.
"Sure, take as long as you want. I'll arrange to have a cot brought in for you to sleep on since I want her to stay overnight for observations."
"Thanks, Doc," Jacob sighed, his eyes burning.
Warner put a reassuring hand on Jacob's shoulder and warmly smiled, "She's going to be fine."
Jacob nodded and watched as Warner walked away. Then with his hand on the door, Jacob wiped away his tears and quickly composed himself. Upon entering the room he saw Janet's curled figure shuddering and weeping on the bed. His heart ached to see her that way. He and Selmak hurried across the room, taking Janet into their arms, holding her tight, showering her teary face with gentle kisses.
"We're here, honey. We're here."
"I'm so sorry…" she choked and sobbed uncontrollably, all the while clinging onto his jacket.
"Shhh, my love. You have nothing to be sorry for," he tenderly whispered into her ear. "We love you…that's all that matters."
"But I lost our baby…"
"No, no you didn't honey. You did nothing wrong," he firmly said, looking into her tear soaked brown eyes. "You exercised like you were supposed to. Ate all the right foods. And if you were eating something you weren't, Cassie was there to take it from you." He paused, seeing her smile. It was a small smile but it was a smile. "Janet, you're a Doctor. You of all people know that these things just happen and sometimes there's no explanation for it. I know that's of no consolation to you. It's not to Selmak or me either. But we don't blame you for what happened to the baby. We love you so much."
"I love you both too," she wept.
"Shh, don't cry honey. Janet, look at me…look at me," he paused, waiting for her to look back to him. "I promise you this…we will get pregnant again. Doc says you are more than capable of bearing children. All you have to do is tell Selmak and I when."
"You…you still want to have a baby with me?"
"Of course," he smiled, pushing his hand through her hair and gently setting her back down on the bed. He took hold of her hand and held it against his chest as he sat on the bed. "We love you with all of our heart. You are our mate by Tok'ra law. We have every intention of being your husband by the laws here. And when you're ready, we'll try to make a baby."
"Promise?" she expectantly asked.
"We promise," he said leaning down and then gently pressed his lips against hers.
"Stay with me?" she pleaded, grabbing onto his jacket.
"Honey, we're not going anywhere," he affectionately smiled.
Janet pulled him down which was fine with Jacob and Selmak. They needed to be as close to her as possible. They held her tight as she cried herself to sleep. It was several hours before Dr. Warner returned and woke Jacob up.
"Can I stay?" he asked, after getting off the bed, being careful to not wake Janet.
"I don't mind," Warner smiled. "But you have some very worried friends out in the hallway."
"Right…I should tell them something," Jacob sighed, staring blankly as Warner was checking Janet's pulse.
"Jacob, the best thing for Janet is to focus on the positives. Don't dwell on the what ifs."
'He's right, Jacob,' Selmak added softly. 'The best thing we can do for Janet is give her our love, make her as happy as possible. Just because we did not have a baby this time doesn't mean we won't.'
"Thanks, Doc. Tell her I'm just outside the door?"
Warner nodded and smiled.
Out in the hall, Jacob had barely made it out the door when Sam wrapped her arms around him with Jack right there behind her.
"I'm so sorry, Dad."
"Anything you need, just ask us," Jack added.
"Cassie…"
"Daniel and Teal'c are picking her up from school," Sam quickly answered. "I figured you would want to tell her."
"I don't know if I can," Jacob admitted.
"You probably won't have to," Jack said. "Cassie called Sam, worried because Janet hadn't returned her calls. I think she knows something happened."
"Jacob!" Cassie shouted from down the hallway. The look on her face as she hurried towards him confirmed that she did know something. "Is Mom ok?"
"She's ok," he replied quickly.
"What about the baby?"
Jacob swallowed hard, his eyes glancing at the others. Cassie eyes instantly welled up.
"Oh…Mom," she whispered, wrapping her arms around him. "Jacob…"
"She'll be ok," he said, hugging her back. "Doc says she can still have children. This time it…it just wasn't meant to be."
The door opened behind Jacob and Dr. Warner came out.
"She's awake," he told them.
"Cassie, go on in," Jacob smiled to her, giving her a gentle nudge.
"You sure?"
"Positive. Go on, kid."
It wasn't until much later while lying in the darkness with Janet in his arms that Jacob came to realized how lucky he was. They may have lost their unborn child but they still had each other. No loss of life was acceptable in Jacob's mind. Losing his first wife was the worst death he had to deal with in his life. Losing the baby was as equally painful. But at least Janet was ok. And even though he was as devastated as she was, he was elated that he still at least had her and that they had many days ahead of them.