AN: So yeah. Chris Colfer's Halloween costume. Hot. As. Fuck. And the inspiration for this fic. Also including the classic silent movie villain costume Chord wore to the event I can't remember, which included a twirly moustache. I just wanted him to tie me to some train tracks.
Crossover with Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, though not actually featuring any of the characters, Bad Horse is referenced.
Title from the 'Bad Horse Chorus', performed by Jed Whedon for Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog
Disclaimer: If you recognise it, it ain't mine.
Warnings: Major Character Death.
The Thoroughbred Of Sin
Tears poured down Blaine's cheeks as the cackling figure tied him methodically to the train tracks; the other man took a moment to twirl his thin black moustache theatrically, hazel eyes alight with amusement as the sun shone on his blonde hair. He stood up once Blaine was securely tied and straightened his neat pin-striped suit, tipping his hat to Blaine as he squinted momentarily into the distance, where a dark shape was speeding down the train tracks towards his victim.
Blaine's head jerked around when a voice rang out, eyes wide with hope that the interloper would save him.
"Honestly Despicable. You know Bad Horse takes a dim view of such cliché theatrics. There's a perfectly good cliff right there, just toss the little twerp off it and we can blow this popsicle stand. Then maybe I'll blow your popsicle."
Blaine blinked, a loan groan in his throat as the figure entered his line of vision. A jet black body suit merged seamlessly into skin-tight black jeans, hugging toned legs and highlighting the finest ass Blaine had ever seen. His muscular arms were bare, and gleamed in the sunlight.
His hands were encased in gloves, with sharpened metal 'hooves' attached which would no doubt be extremely dangerous if he struck someone with them. His boots had faux fur and pointed cloven 'hooves', again made of metal and ideal for kicking, something he proved by drawing a leg back and kicking Blaine hard in the side, causing him to cough up blood and groan.
The figure stared down at him, eyes bright and maliciously amused behind a classic 'raccoon' style mask. Two flashlights were attached either side of his head, and a tall headdress was perched in chestnut locks. An unusual looking gun was strapped to one thigh, and slender knives lined the outsides of his boots.
He leaned down and slit the ropes binding Blaine with one 'hoof', hauling him upright without any sign of effort, Blaine babbling thanks that were cut off when he was carried unceremoniously towards the cliff edge, and he began to struggle in the implacable grip of his assailant.
"Who are you? Why are you doing this?"
A cold smirk curved full lips.
"I'm the Llamanator. And honestly your hair alone would be a good enough reason for me to be rid of you. But in this case, you pissed off the wrong person, and the Evil League of Evil takes care of its own."
Without another word he heaved, and Blaine screamed as he went over the cliff edge, looking up into the interested eyes of the Llamanator as the ground rushed up towards him. He hit with a thud that echoed round the landscape, and his world went dark.
…...
Kurt smiled to himself as he disposed of the trash. If Dr. Despicable pulled off one more cliché murder the League would expel him for sure, Bad Horse had a very firm stance on that issue. And if Despicable was expelled his whining would be appalling. It was bad enough he had to put up with that shit from victims, he wasn't going to accept it from his lover too.
He strolled over to Sam, the 'hooves' on his hands sliding back so that he could sink deceptively delicate fingers into sun-kissed blonde hair, hauling him down for a scorching kiss, tongue delving deep for a long moment.
When they pulled apart he cuffed his lover round the back of the head, before dragging him towards the Lllamamobile.
"To the Lllama-Farm Despicable! I wanna be rode hard and put away wet!"
Sam grinned eagerly as he climbed into the passenger seat of the converted Navigator. Kurt always got horny as fuck after killing someone, and he was gonna take advantage as much as he could.
AN: …... So yeah. That happened...