TITLE: I having a baby!

AUTHOR/S: Michael

PAIRING: B'Elanna & Seven of Nine

RATING: Fan Fiction T Suitable for teens, 13 years and older, with some violence, minor coarse language, and minor suggestive adult themes. (PG13)

BETA READING:

FEEDBACK: or on sight!

DISCLAIMER: Star Trek and all the main characters are owned by Paramount Pictures/CBS Network Television, A Viacom/CBS Corporation. Star Trek: Voyager. Created by, Rick Berman, Michael Piller & Jeri Taylor, and is based on Star Trek, created by Gene Roddenberry.

WARNING: This is a piece of fiction, concerning an implied F/F relationship. If anyone objects to same sex relationships, you should not be reading this fan fiction, and should read the Star Trek Range of Novels, or find another sight.

SUMMERY: B'Elanna tells something important

NOTES: My 24th & last VJB fic of the year – is this a record?

"I'm pregnant!" B'Elanna Torres explained to a shocked Senior Staff meeting.

"Congratulations B'Elanna; Tom." Janeway replied happily, assuming the baby was the Helm Wanker in Chief's, and not Seven of Nine's, as in her heart-of-hearts she knew, but was in denial.

"It's not mine." Helmrat answered sadly, knowing full well that any chance of getting back with his former wife. However he perked up, as an irrational idea spluttered into life in his pea brain. "But of course, if B'Elanna doesn't know who the father is I'll more than happy to step in."

A soft mesh covered hand stopped B'Elanna from launching across the conference table at her ex.

"I don't think that will be necessary Mr Paris, you can barely tie your own shoe-laces let alone look after a child."

Hey I resent that, I am more than capable of doing my shoe-laces up, it only happened once, besides as the ships helm officer...'

"In which you push a few buttons, whilst the computer does all the work, besides I do not want you anywhere near my daughter when she is born."

"A daughter? A baby daughter?" Chuckles murmured woodenly.

"Of course she's having a daughter; even you should know something about genetics, Cmdr!" The EMH chastised the wooden Commander, and started to scan Chakotay, just in case squirrels were nesting in his skull again.

Thankfully they were not, however the Doctor did notice a wisp of smoke coming from Chuckles right ear, and he summarised, quite correctly, that the friction caused, by saying such a long sentence (for chuckles anyway), had caused his head to catch alight.

The Doctor immediately replicated a large syringe full of water, and injected it into the Wooden Commanders ear, there was a hissing sound another puff of smoke, as the water put the fire out, luckily stopping the smouldering cranium from igniting his creosote!

The EMH looked around the Conference Room with a smug look on his face. He of course knew what was going on; he had helped Seven design the procedure to combine their DNA. In fact he would make a killing on both the who would get pregnant first pool and the who would Seven of Nine start a relationship with first pool, though he did promise to split the winnings fifty-fifty with his two best friends. What did astound him though is why no one else in the Senior Crew had a suspicion on what was going on. The two had been living together for the last six months, for Zimmerman's sake!

Tuvok's eyebrows, had travelled so far up, that they were now in synchronous around Voyager, giving B'Elanna the idea whether they could swap them for extra resources, as a set Space Elevator anchors.

Meanwhile Tom seemed to be crying like a baby and calling for his momma; Harry was looking at the two ladies in question, and speculating if they would be interested in a threesome, (he had heard the Klingon females get very horny whilst pregnant), whilst Chakotay, well it was difficult to figure out any emotional response from the First Officer, but a quick scan with his tricorder, had confirmed to the Doctor, that he had taken root.

As for Captain Yo-Yo knickers, her expression was a mass of contradictions, from anger and hurt – to sadness, but not a shred of happiness at the news.

"Have you got something to say Captain?"

"How could you?"

"How could you what? Find happiness?"

"Yes I wanted you both find happiness, but with me damn it!"

"I rescued you from the Borg," She shouted hysterically pointing to Seven. "And you," now pointing at B'Elanna, "I broke that rebellious angry young woman and turned her into a respectable Starfleet Officer! And this is the thanks I get! All I wanted is you both to sleep with me once, so I could break Kirk's record, but no; you had to fall in love with one another!"

"I... ahh!" she sighed as the hypo hissed into her neck, and a happy vacant look adorned her once scowling features.

"I apologies ladies," said the Doctor acting contrite as he guided the Captain back into her chair. I forgot to give the Captain her caffeine shot this morning. She'll be fine now."

After a few seconds the vacant stare left Ole Janners face, and she seemed to be her normal self.

"So congratulations are in order!" She walked over to the Replicator, and ordered a bottle of non-alcoholic Champaign and glasses.

Pouring it out, she passed it around the Senior Crew.

"But, she was just vilifying us?" A confused and angry Seven of Nine whispered to her wife.

B'Elanna realised that Seven had never seen Janeway 'go off meds,' as it were, so she didn't know what to expect.

"Forget about it Soch, she gets like that when her body is out of caffeine, she doesn't mean anything she says when she is like that, and as soon as the shot has been administered she forgets everything she has said!"

"What about the rest of them?"

"I do think they were against the announcement per-say, I think they were surprised and disappointed."

"Disappointed?"

"Yeah - that I got my hands on you before they could! The only one stupid enough to try something is Helm Wanker, but I'll soon remind him it's not worth it."

Seven looked around the Conference room, at the laughing and joking Senior Staff, wondered for the umpteenth time if she was the sanest person onboard this vessel. Realising it didn't matter, she shrugged her shoulders took a sip of her drink, and went to talk to Commander Tuvok

The End