I was frustrated, on the verge of crying, I wanted to rip my hair out, I felt like screaming. I knew I couldn't though, I was only dreaming.
I woke up in a cold sweat, breathing heavily. I rushed outside of my tent. The whole camp was dead, everyone was asleep. I took a few deep breaths. Lately, my dreams have been nightmares, I hated them. I hated people seeing me so emotionally 'out-of-it'. I calmed down, went back inside, crawled back into my hammock, I shut my eyes and said a small prayer to the Vampire Gods, and drifted away into another hell I called a dream.
I'm Darren Shan, half Vampire. I'm an assistant to a Vampire named Larten Crepsley, a tall, pale, lean man with a crop of orange hair. Secretly I thought he was a very handsome man. A large scare ran down the left side of his face, made it worse. We currently work and preform at a traveling circus called the Cirque Du Freak, A loving family of freaks.
My best friend, Evra Von, he's a snake boy, Mostly human, partly snake. He and I have been though a lot together. I've been working at the Cirque for about two years now, love every day of it. The 'Ring leader' of the circus was Mr. Tall. Ironically, he was extremely tall. Me, being 5'10, I still had to look up to look him in the eyes.
Anyways, I used to share a tent with Evra, about four months I started having my mood swings. I would sometimes cry in my sleep, Evra would wake me up and tell me what was going on. I didn't feel like bothering him anymore. One day, a little incident happened. I took full advantage of it. I accidently walked in on Evra.. Playing with himself. I think I was more embarrassed than him, but I hinted at Mr. Tall about what happened. He said he understood and moved me into a tent next to Evra. Me and Evra are still very close friends.
A few months ago, Me, Evra, and Mr. Crepsley, all had to go out of town, to Mr. Crepsleys hometown to be exact. We had some personal business to take care of. -We had to kill a crazed Vampaneze- A vampaneze is the vampires cousins. About 400 years ago they were all vampires living under the same rules, until a disagreement spread across them, a small group broke away from the pack and made their own rules and laws plus, we vampires don't kill when we drink from humans, vampaneze do.-
anyway, while we were there I stumbled upon a girl named Debbie Hemlock. We dated for a few days while we were there but it didn't work out much. I let Evra meet Debbie, He liked her. Ugh. After I got back from the city I started getting strange feelings when I was around Evra and Mr. Crepsley. Even though all Evra talked about was Debbie. Debbie this, Debbie that.
One day, we had moved on, farther up north. We had an excellent show Friday night, until one of my mood swings hit right after the show. I was back stage, my face was paler than normal, I was in the dressing room with Mr. Crepsley, when it happened. My hands turned into fists and my chest tightened. I told Mr. Crepsley. "Hey, I don't feel good. So can I go?" "What is wrong?" He asked. "Eh, I just feel sick." I paused. "I gotta go!" I almost yelled at him. I ran out of there, I sprinted to my tent. As soon as I got there I started crying. I sat in the floor, sobbing, my hands covering my face. "Darren! What is wrong!?" The voice from my tent door made shivers run up my back.
I had been caught.
It was Mr. Crepsley. I didn't answer. I couldn't, I was crying to hard. He let himself in and sat next to me. He put an arm around me. I felt comfort surround me. This was the first time I've felt this good in months, all I could do is cry more. His grip tightened around me, I rested my head against his shoulder. I began to calm down again. It's like his touch triggered something. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked me, I couldn't talk so I just shook my head.
A few minutes later I started talking. "Well," I paused "It all started about three months ago.. Ever since we got back really..." I sighed "Go on." Mr. Crepsley spoke. "Well, ever since Debbie and Evra started dating-" I was interrupted by the shocked voice of Mr. Crepsley. "They are dating!?" He growled "That is!" He paused to find the appropriate word to use. "It is going to be a very frustrating time." He sighed "Yeah, sexually frustrating.." I muttered "Excuse me?" Mr. Crepsley asked. "Nothing!" I smiled weakly. "Darren, I expect you to get a lot of healthy sleep tonight…" He said as he stood and helped me up. "Yes sir." I nodded. He smiled a rare smiled that made my insides melt. He nodded and headed for the door. "Good night, Darren." He said looking over his shoulder. "Good night sir." I said, and he vanished. I slumped against the wall. "I love you Mr. Crepsley." I said with a whisper.