I do not own Harry Potter or his clan of enemies, friends, lovers, teachers. Or any place he may of visited one ago in Joanne Rowlings mind. Amen.

Pairing: Referance to DracoXPansy and HarryXDraco

Summary: Someone pissed on this flower, and now this flower's pissed.

As if our lives couldn't get worse, I saw you looking across the hall. After all these years of being mine, of pretending to be training Death Eaters to please our parents and families, after our betrothal, I saw you looking.

It's lunch, on a very sunny and warm April day, unusual weather, but as I woke up to the spring, and looked out of my enchanted windows, I knew today was to be a special day. The sun beamed down, enlightening all the dark that had been swept over the castle the previous year. The sun seemed to wash out the grief and sadness. Everyone could feel it too, it was obvious how much life seemed to return to the grounds of Hogwarts, we had begged for it, cried for it and even bled for it, for months and there it was simplicity.

My nanny used to play me a muggle song when I couldn't sleep, 'Here comes the sun', and even though I pretend not to like the sun's rays, I appreciated it more than anything, for flowers bloom in the sunshine.

But something seemed to piss on this plant as I caught you looking. Potter, once again, raiding your thoughts.

As if it wasn't good enough for you, that you had to join the side of the light and go against everything we had worked so hard for. Naturally I followed, but only to be with you. And then, whilst with the Order, I saw you looking. Staring as Harry would sit around, awaiting the end of his misfortunate life. If I had not taken that wizard's oath to protect the Order and all that was contained within it I think I would have killed Potter for stealing your thoughts away from me.

And how about that time that I saw you staring, whilst he sat just a mere ten feet from you, as the Order had shaken us out of the 'Place' when the Dark Lord was defeated? Remember? We didn't want to leave; we all just sat around, staring at odd pieces of carpet in the middle room of the 'Place'. No one wanted to admit that the biggest parts of our lives so far had done him over, got killed. And now that space that was reserved only for him was empty, we had to let go, but it left us so hollow.

I thought that you would replace that space with me Draco, I believed that I would be the one to replace that little sparkle that was once left for hate and misery, I thought I could replace it with all the love and happiness you seemed to fill me with.

But you kept on staring, when you knew he wasn't looking. Staring at Potter, who you had sworn you would never like, the very day he turned you down as you offered your hand of malicious friendship, even though you knew no better than to be like that. And you knew better than to be mean to him. But you still did it, and you're still staring as I am sitting here, staring at you, and biting back tears that beg me to let them fall.

Your hair is shining in that same way it always has, bright, bold, beautiful. Oh Draco, I miss your touches. I should have thought something was up as we started to have sex less often, and when we did you just fucked me and got it over with instead of taking your time and making love to me, like the first time we happened.

And no real sunshine, or real snow, or lovers tears could ever push me too feel like that again, because only you could. And now I'm stuck here, without you, because you just got up and left the hall.

And I have noticed him get up too, and he is staring at the back of you, and I realize, that's the way it has been for a while now. You're both staring at each other secretly; no one knows it except you two, and now me.

And without warning, I have thrown off the ring that your Father gave to me as a young girl, and straight into the bowl of chocolate sauce it goes. I'm giving you up Draco, and when you realize that he won't be there as much as I would have been, you won't be able to come back. No, it's over now.

I think the whole school is staring at me now, funny turn huh? However the embarrassment it too much, I over did my outburst.

So I am the next to stand up and walk out of the hall, not caring where I go. My feet are leading me slowly down the passages and corridors that have become so familiar to me over the years, however I'm taking an unusual turn about now and I know it's leading me somewhere unfamiliar.

Oh nice one, I'm hearing someone talk, someone kissing, good gossip for me!

'I think I'm falling,' your voice.

'If you see half the things in my mind, you would have the chance to know how much I'm falling too, I now hold my head up high,' His words.

And I no longer can hold back the tears.