Being a vampire sucked.
…
No pun intended.
From the weird allergies, to the lack of reflection, the constant need to apply five hundred proof sunblock so I don't fry, or the fact that I'm now nocturnal, which means I only get the shitty TV shows.
That's not even counting how I got my current vampireness. I believe the correct term for the way I was turned would be a "forced turning." Not very creative I know, but what monsters lack in terminology they make up for it in puns.
Painful, painful puns.
To make a long story short, this vampire named Lord Stocker caused my current vampiric state, he got in trouble with the new vampire Queen over it, she gave me his estate and title, and now I live in New Salem as some kind of nobility with my human family.
The Queen, a vampiress named Elissabat, gave me books on what it being vampire entailed and on monsterkind in general, then had a tutor show me how not to eat anyone with a pulse.
So… ya.
What every teenager has to deal with.
The plus side though, Lord Stoker was a rich SOB, so now I'm essentially a rich SOB with an unnecessary big Victorian style house. Provided by the butt lots of moola I'm the proud owner of.
My sisters and mom were crazy supportive over the whole changing species thing. My mom threw fits on my behalf, my twin sister Skylar went to the drugstore for iron pills and sunblock, my youngest sister Emma drew pictures of what I look like as a vampire since I can't see my reflection in the mirror, my younger sister Claire lent me her Harry Potter books, and my oldest sister Drew gave me shit for not sparkling.
Women.
I thought my junior year would mostly consist of studying for the SATs, trying not to fail at life, being an awkward mess, and staying away from my twin sister's grabby friends.
What I got was a mess of a summer with no human school in the New Salem area enrolling me, because I'm a potentially a hazard for their students with my dietary needs.
Which is fine, because school sucks and I'll use any excuse to not go.
But my mom was like, "No, you're going to school, so get your pale ass in here and help me look for the key to your future."
So I was home free, 'cuz no one wanted a blood sucking night demon integrated with their nice non night demon human students.
Speciesist bastards.
That is until me and my mom were invited to visit an all monster school called Monster High. Again not a very creative name, but my mom dragged me to a meeting with the Headmistress Bloodgood.
At first glance Headmistress Bloodgood looked normal enough, with the exception of the Victorian looking clothes and her horse Nightmare. That mindset way quickly shattered when halfway through her speech on monster equality and what the school stood for, she lifted her head from her shoulder and tucked it under her arm still talking.
My eyes widened. So that's what wrong with her.
And judging by the choked breath beside me, my mom was a little freaked out by the headless horsewomen in front of them.
She handed me and my mom a map of the campus (which had a train station, which ran 24/7), a list of classes, and a rulebook.
"Well, Mr. MacCallaghan what do think?" The Headmistress inquired behind her desk with her head still tucked under her arm.
Crap, my mind still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that her head was detachable and not the words coming from said detachable head's mouth.
"Um, it all sounds very… interesting. Yes, interest. It sounds interest," I rambled, scratching the back of my neck.
My mom sent me a reproaching look for not paying attention before clearing her throat and asked when the new school year started.
And my fate was sealed...
…
"Did take your iron pill?"
"Yep."
"Did you put on your sunscreen?"
"If hadn't I'd be on fire."
Wack.
"What the hell. Why'd ya do that."
"That's for bein' a smart ass to your mother."
"Pff, whatever."
The first day of school was always the worst. From the new teachers. to waking up unnecessarily early (which kind of sucks being nocturnal), and the social norm of dressing up nicely on the first day (me and my sweatpants were like best friends).
So I was awoken at an ungodly hour (7:00) by my sister Skylar, who's a morning person, which I'm not… obviously.
Then the witch had the nerve to be let out a constant stream of cheerful chatter while searching, bypassing the comfy clothes, for the nice clothes in my closet (I'm more than capable dressing myself thank you very much).
After sleepily going through my morning routine (with the addition of applying sunblock), and attempting to dressing in sweats (bitch yelled at me), I dressed in the jeans and long red flannel shirt Skylar left out and waited for the she-witch, leaning back against front door with my arms crossed enduring abused by the hand of my mother.
"How do I look, perfect or perfect," inquired Skylar walking past the arched stairway .
Cocking a brow, I looked her up and down. She was wearing a lavender sundress with her long black hair tied back in a complex looking braid, and had a dangerous looking pair of high heels on. She'd also put on a healthy dollop of makeup on her face to accentuate her navy eyes and pouty lips.
"Ya look like a hussy."
Wack.
"Oww. What the hell. Is it hit Liam today or something."
"That's for lying brat. I look hot and you know it."
"Why haven't I eaten you yet?"
Skylar pinched my cheek while making cooing sounds. "Your sooo cute when you pout. Now let's go before we're late for our first day of school." She walked toward the door, grabbed the car keys on the key holders and her backpack, before strolling out toward the driveway.
Mom kissed my cheeks and hugged before say, "Have a good first day, and remember not to be such a little bastard sweetie, you need to make friend."
"Make friends? With monsters? At the monster school?"
She began pushing me out the door. "Good job Liam, you can hear."
"Hey, I don't appreciate the sarcasm."
With a "That's nice sweetie" she very rudely handed me my massager bag, pushed me toward the glaring sun, then with a wave, shut the door behind my back. I hissed at the bright light.
Women.
BEEP! BEEP!
"Get in bitch, we're going to late."
I glared at my sister's Ford Taurus.
So it begins.
…
I should've known this was going to be weird.
Not like getting turned into a new species weird, but cheesy sitcom family time weird.
First, it started before I even got out of the car. Skylar was in the process of dropping me off, 'cuz she goes to the nice normal human school, while I go to Monster High.
She was excited about something lady related, and I was pretending to listen, like all brothers and males do when women rant. Playing with my phone I didn't notice that we'd arrived to my new monster school.
Click.
I looked up, brows furrowed confused. Skylar was holding a small pink camera, squealing at the picture she just took.
"That better not be a picture of me, 'cuz I'll bust that camera if it is."
"But you looked so cute, I need just needed to show the club," she whined.
My sister isn't normal. That maybe a common thing siblings say about each other, but she seriously maybe a bit insane.
It started when, in seventh grade, a friend of my sister showed her a manga, and not just any manga, a yaoi manga.
For all those blessed people who have never heard of or had anything to do with yaoi, never ever get involved. It's like a crazy drug or something, because after reading that one manga Skylar went bat shit crazy.
She join forums, bought enough yaoi manga and BL novels to fill a small library, and even made a yaoi club with all her cheerleading friends. It didn't help that she's one of the "popular" kids, so every girl and their grandmas wanted in. Then to complete the madness she thought I'd make the perfect uke.
Whatever the hell that was.
But as a consequence Skylar and her little club members constantly taking picture of me, it's even worse now that I'm a vampire. What they do with said pictures I have not idea, and I don't think I want to know.
Which begins us back to the point.
Baring my fangs, I snatched the camera from the crazy woman's grasp and looked at the black and white photo (which is the only medium of photo that works on vampires), before with a click of a button deleted said photo, to the protest of my sister.
Satisfied, I tossed the camera at my grumbling sibling and looked out the window toward the massive school building, watching the different shapes and size of my new peers.
Anxiety pool in my stomach.
I my of looked nervous 'cuz Skylar squeezed my shoulder, "You'll be fine, if anyone bothers you, just call me and I'll kick their ass."
I snorted.
"Sure, I'll call the puny human to fight bully monsters," I fluttered my eyelashes mockingly, "my hero."
Wack.
"Will you stop doing that."
My sister pulled a rare serious face. "Serious call me if you need anything, no matter how stupid or unnecessary you think it is."
Grabbing my messenger bag, I opened the door. Looking at my sister I clicked my tongue. "Fine."
Skylar flashed a dazzling smile, before pointing toward at the school. "Hurry up or I'm going to be late."
Getting out, I shut the door, and gave her a wave before walking toward the monster school.
I eyeballed the various shapes, colors, and movements of my fellow classmates walking toward the massive building. My eyes taking in rotting flesh, fur, fangs, miscellaneous gelatinous forms, and scales.
...
While at least they're divers, I thought some what hysterically.
Sighing, I walked toward the school, excepting my fate.
I looked up at the bright blue sky, and prayed to the monster Gods for a no stupid bull shit. Hopefully Monster High is just like a regular school.
I mean how different could it be from a human school? Monster were like people. Right?