The Danish Diaries (It's not Girly!): Chapter 1

Well, there I was, sober. It was October 27th, 2013, the first time in months that I stopped drinking. I remember the day's events rather clearly. It all started at the Nordic family meeting, which was going nowhere, as usual. The entire time I sat in my chair, just staring and staring at Norway from across the table. Iceland shot me a hateful comment, something about always being drunk, to which I immediately retaliated. This sparked an argument between the two of us, Sweden and Finland slowly inching away. Just when it started to get physical, throwing objects and challenging the other to a fist-fight, Norway jumped in.

"Cut it out, you two!" He gave me his signature Norwegian Death Glare. Iceland crossed his arms and grumbled, making me think that he actually enjoyed fighting with me. "Iceland, I know you're right, but we're in the middle of a meeting here."

"Ah, sure, he's right," I said sarcastically. No reply. "I swear to god, I'm blind stinking' sober! Seriously, try me." Norway rolled his eyes.

"No, no, I believe you. After all, you're not hitting on me all the time. I guess that's an improvement, at least you're not so desperate you would date a cat."

"What? I wouldn't date a cat..." I could see his disbelieving eyes.

"Funny, that's not what you told me yesterday." Suddenly I remembered and face-palmed.

"Norway, you don't get it. I didn't say that I would date just any cat, I said that if you turned into a cat I just might gain a feline fetish."

"Yeah... That's still pretty weird. Now, c'mon, let's wrap up this immensely unproductive meeting."

"No, you're not even listening!" He turned to me. "The only reason I said that is because you're amazing! And I love you no matter what!" I quickly covered my mouth the moment it slipped out, before clearing my throat and continuing. "And it's not weird. Greece does it."

"Denmark?" It was a little later now. I sat next to Norway on the couch and saw the faraway look in his violet eyes. I knew that he was about to say something wistful and deep. Something important, maybe about our little 'relationship'. I turned towards him and motioned for him to go on. "Are you sure you're not drunk?" I almost choked on my own spit.

"No. Wait, yes. Wait... I'm not drunk. I'm sure. Why?" I was definitely sober, but the way I spit that out didn't really agree.

"Well, you know, you still are hitting on me."

"Am not."

"Denmark." Norway swivelled his whole body so his eyes were parallel with mine. "You just said that you 'love me no matter what'. I think you're hitting on me. Just a little."

"W-well, that's not saying that I'm drunk. Ya know, telling you I love you... What if I really do?" Norway scoffed, obviously not believing me. "I-I do! And I'm sober!"

"Yeah, sure, and England can cook. Give me some kind of proof that you really haven't had any beer today." I sighed, rapping my knuckles on the coffee table three times in rapid succession. As intended, Finland was standing in front of us in seconds.

"Hey, Finnie, I'm sober, right?"

"Huh? Oh, yes, Mr. Denmark. I haven't seen you drink a drop of alcohol today. Congratulations on the prohibition, by the way! Is this going to be long-term?"

"No, now go away." The kid nodded and did as he was told. "Ah?" Norway and I both knew that Finland would never lie, especially not to our faces.

"Fine, I guess you're right... Just one thing, though. Why is Finland at your beck and call?" I shrugged.

"Kid lost a bet. Now he has to do whatever I tell him for two whole months." I leaned back into the couch. "So, you wanna go out with me?"

"Hell no!"

"Not even if I prove that I really love you?"

"Fine, of you can do that, then I suppose I can go with you on one date. One. Da-" Before Norway could finish his emphasis, I smashed my lips against his, pulling away rather quickly and staring at him.

"Well, did that prove anything?" He nodded, a bit stunned. Yeah. I was just that good of a kisser.

"Ok... And as much as I hate to admit it, you really smell kinda nice... I mean, when you haven't been drinking..." I laughed.

"Yeah. I know."

Author's Note:

Yay! This was actually an idea I had a long time ago, I've just never written down until now. There's definitely more on the way, here. :3