A/N: Happy birthday, Catrogue! This story, staring the a-mah-zing Penny Hartz, is for you. Of course, I couldn't leave the CAT Squad behind, so they're going to be hanging out with the Happy Endings gang a bit. :)

mxpw is also joining me in wishing you a happy birthday. ("Happy birthday, Cat!" said Max.) Max beta'd this chapter in record time so I could post it for you today, and he helped me out—a lot—with it in the process. He's magical. Thanks, Maximus.

I made some modifications that haven't been checked out, so I'm sorry if there's some typos/mistakes left. They're all mine and I'll try to correct them if they come to my attention.

Have a fabulous birthday, you crazy [redacted inappropriate comment]!

Chapter 1: In for a Penny

"Penny," Max said. "Todd was gay, okay. I'm telling you."

"Did he call you?" Penny asked.

"No," Max said. "But—"

"But nothing! And why are you following me?"

Penny was heading to her neighbors'—Devon and Ellie Woodcomb—house. Ellie's brother, Chuck Bartowski, was in town with his girlfriend, and they were visiting his sister. More importantly, Chuck's girlfriend was Sarah Walker.

Sarah Walker! From the CAT Squad!

Penny had known buying her condo had been one of her greatest ideas. The Year of Penny might be over, but its fruits were still paying off months afterwards.

Not that that was the only reason why Penny had befriended her neighbors. Devon and Ellie were awesome people. Devon's nickname was literally "Captain Awesome"—and he wore it so well (especially when he jogged around the block half naked).

"I'm just trying to be a good…" Max searched for something to say. "Neighbor-friend."

"You're still crushing on Devon," Penny said, as they made it to the door. She knocked.

Max puffed. "No. What?! No! Absolutely not."

"He's handsome," Penny said.

"I know!" Max said.

"And he works out a lot."

"Yeeaahhh."

Max's dreamy face sobered when Ellie opened the door. "Hey, Pen," the brunette said. "And…Max."

Max waved.

"Hi," Penny said. "I just wanted—"

Max coughed, loudly.

"—we just wanted to check how you and Sarah were doing, you know, after what happened yesterday at The Stud Shop?"

Ellie smiled. "Oh, thanks. Come on in," she said, moving to the side. "We were just having coffee."

"Is Devon here?" Max asked, looking right and left as they wandered inside.

"No, he's working the afternoon," Ellie said.

Devon and Ellie were both doctors. He was the head of some fancy medical center's cardiac division, which meant he had hectic hours at times. She was doing neurology research there. They were quite the power couple.

"Oh," Max said, clearly disappointed.

"He'll be at the concert tonight, though," Ellie said.

"Great!"

"Where's the little devil?" Penny asked.

Devon and Ellie's daughter, Clara, loved Penny—which wasn't surprising because Penny had a knack with kids.

"Clara's at the park," Ellie said. "She's on a play date with a friend from school."

Penny tried not to be bothered by the fact that a two-year-old was on a date when she wasn't. Then she remembered how her last date had gone horribly, horribly wrong. Maybe she'd met her soulmate tonight. What could be better than a CAT Squad concert for that?

"Hey, guys," Sarah said when they made it to the kitchen. Max and Penny had already met the blonde singer, almost accidentally outside of Casa Woodcomb. In truth, Penny had waited for the opportune moment to run into Chuck and Sarah. Max had been there. He'd been hanging out at Penny's house a lot since the gang had learned the news about Chuck and Sarah coming to town.

She wanted to greet Sarah back, but words were suddenly failing Penny. She'd practically gotten used to speaking with the pop star after seeing her multiple times during the week. However, sitting next to Sarah at the kitchen isle, was someone Penny hadn't met yet: one of Sarah's CAT Squad co-singer, Carina Miller.

Penny inwardly squeed. She did like her neighbors—she appreciated them a lot—but Penny had also used the excuse of checking on them in the hope of meeting the rest of the CAT Squad.

The pop band had been one of the gang's favorite since day one, and Chuck and Sarah hadn't been visiting Ellie and Devon this week haphazardly. The CAT Squad was having a concert this weekend in Chicago. After years of separation, the band had reunited recently for a charity event in New York. They had announced a month later that they were coming back with a new album, albeit as a trio. One member of the original quartet, Amy, wasn't in the group anymore for reasons that hadn't been revealed to the press. Regardless, Carina Miller, Sarah Walker, and Zondra Rizzo reworking together was undeniably the musical buzz of the moment.

Because they were awesome people as well, after meeting Max and Penny, Chuck and Sarah had invited the entire gang to the concert, which was a-mah-zing in itself. But knowing that the CATs would almost certainly be dropping by Chuck's sister's during the weekend—from what she'd gathered taking walks near their house, not at all like a stalker—Penny couldn't let the opportunity to meet the entire Squad in person pass.

"Hi!" Penny said finally. Max waved again, this time shyly. "I'm so sorry to barge in on you like this."

She wasn't.

"No, come on," Ellie said, inviting them to sit. "You guys haven't met yet. Carina, this is our neighbor Penny, and her best friend, Max. And you guys must know who Carina is, so…"

"Obviously," Max said.

"Nice to meet you," Carina said. "You guys are coming to the concert tonight?"

"Definitely," Max said. "We and our best friends are all fans from way back."

Well, almost all fans. Dave never really understood the CAT Squad fever for whatever reason. What was wrong with him?

Ellie placed a mug of coffee in front of both Max and Penny, before serving them. She was so sweet, and her house always looked so good and inviting.

"Penny wanted to check on us after yesterday," Ellie told Sarah.

Penny had invited Ellie and Sarah to check out the Saracen expo in town yesterday, knowing Sarah was a fan of the artist (she'd read it in a magazine at her hairdresser). They were supposed to meet at The Stud Shop—Best. Muffins. Ever.—before heading to the art gallery, but the entire place had been overrun with police officers when Penny had arrived. A perimeter had been set up around the coffee shop, and there had visibly been some kind of incident inside. Furniture had been all over the place.

"Aww, thanks," Sarah said.

Sarah Walker had just awed at her. Breathe, Penny.

"We're fine, though," Sarah added, and she glanced at Ellie with a meaning that escaped Penny. "It was nothing."

"It's just," Penny said, "when I saw you this morning as I was, uh, around… doing…stuff. Anyway, you mentioned going to the police?"

"I was delivering tickets to the cops who took care of us," Sarah said.

"That's very generous," Max said. "Can you sign my boob? I love you guys!"

"Get it together," Penny muttered to Max. "He's kidding!"

"I'm kidding," Max said, nodding. "Don't listen to anything I say."

Carina and Sarah only smiled. They were so pretty!

"As I was saying," Penny said, "it was all kind of crazy, so I just felt like, you know, making sure."

"That's very sweet of you," Ellie said. "It was really just an altercation gone bad." She waved a hand. "Cops said it happens all the time."

"Okay, boring," Carina said, twirling her red hair. "Everybody's feeling great! Let's talk about something interesting." She turned to Max and Penny specifically. "We were just talking about what we're doing tonight, after the concert. Please tell your neighbor she needs to take advantage of the babysitter she's hired for the concert, and come party with us afterwards."

"Carina," Ellie said, desperately.

"Are you kidding?" Penny said to Ellie. "Why wouldn't you?"

"Exactly!" Carina said, making Sarah chuckle. "Oh, I know!"

"Oh, boy," Ellie said.

"You guys should totally come with us too!" Carina said.

Max and Penny shared a look, trying to keep the freak out inside.

"Come on, Ellie, you and Devon won't be the only people not used to show biz soirées. Though, seriously, have you met your brother? Chuck still looks like a dear caught in the headlights most of the time we go out." Sarah grimaced next to Carina, but didn't deny it. "I love it!" Carina carried on. "But I'm sure he could use the company."

A smile tugged at Ellie's lips. She seemed to be tempted. But again, why wouldn't she be? "What do you think?" Ellie asked Max and Penny.

Neither of them said anything, though Penny thought she might have let out a squeak.

"It's settled then," Carina said. "The party is on. How many are the best friends you mentioned."

"Uh, four?" Max said, somehow finding his voice.

"Good, bring them too," Carina said. "The more the merrier."

Sarah said the last part with a laugh, simultaneously with her redheaded friend.

"Really?" Penny squeaked again.

"Don't tease us, woman," Max said.

—H—

"Hey, bitches!"

"Hey, guys!"

"Wait a minute," Penny said, squinting over Alex and Dave's new living room. "Were you guys having a couples date?"

Max and Penny were just joining the rest of the gang. Alex, Brad, Dave, and Jane all looked at each other.

"No," Brad attempted. His voice was too high.

"Reeaally?"

"We were just hanging out," Jane said.

"Just the four of you, though."

"Pen, you were with Max," Dave pointed out.

"Oh, right," Penny said. "I guess that makes sense. But don't think just because you're back to being two couples, you can just couples date without us."

"That sounds difficult," Brad said.

"Alex and I are sisters," Jane agreed. "It's bound to happen."

"Whatev."

Penny walked to join Jane and Alex behind the kitchen bar, and grabbed two beers from the fridge. She pondered for a second whether alcohol was a good idea after the excitement from earlier, and eventually thought it might help calmed her nerves.

The CAT Squad singers were about the same age as the gang, and their songs had accompanied Penny's whole college experience and more. She still listened regularly to Feline Fine after a break up, or tried and cheered herself up with Plenty of Fish in the Sea. Like pretty much the rest of the world, she'd been heartbroken when the band had announced their separation, though she'd kept following each of their solo careers. Seeing them back together on stage was incredible, but meeting them was simply beyond words.

"Max," Dave said, turning around on the couch, "what are you doing?"

Max had peeled out of his cardigan, and was now taking off his t-shirt. "Carina Miller touched this t-shirt," he said. "It needs to be framed."

"Whaaat!" Brad said.

"We dropped by the Woodcomb's," Penny explained, moving around to hand Max his beer, "and Sarah and Carina were there."

"Why didn't you tell us?!" Jane said. "You give us crap for couples dating, and you two go incognito to meet with the CAT Squad?!"

Penny fought down the fear of a pissed off Jane. "First," she said, "I thought you weren't couples dating."

"We weren't," Jane said in earnest.

"And second," Penny went on, making a mental note to keep an eye on their couples dating. Even Max had had a more serious relationship than she in the past year. Why couldn't she found a boyfriend and be the one couples dating? "My excuse to stop by was only a one person excuse."

"Why was Max there too, then?" Brad whined.

Max flopped down next to Brad on the couch, and gave him a look.

"Right," Brad said. "It's Max."

"That's right!"

Dave reentered the room, though Penny hadn't noticed he'd left. He threw a V-neck t-shirt Max's way, before Jane asked in a clearly disappointed tone, "What was your excuse anyway?"

"Checking up on Ellie after yesterday's incident," Penny said.

"Nicely done," Jane admitted.

"Thank you."

"What was yesterday's incident?" Alex asked.

"Oh, there was some kind of altercation at The Stud Shop yesterday," Penny said. Alex and Dave hadn't joined the rest of the gang the previous night when Penny had told them about what had occurred at the shop—they'd been on a date, trying to do something special to keep things fresh between them…whatever. Penny didn't even care that much. "Ellie and Sarah were there when it happened."

"Oh, I heard about it," Dave said. "Are they okay?"

"Yeah, they're fine."

"About that," Brad said, "have you seen the news?" He grabbed the TV remote.

"No, why?" Penny asked. "Oh, did you guys see that tiger from the zoo?"

"Crazy," Dave said.

A bunch of animals had escaped from a zoo during the night, keeping the authorities busy, and every Chicagoans on their toes.

"So kewt, though."

"I saw it," Brad said. "And agreed. I mean, these little paws, right? But that wasn't what I meant. They're talking about The Stud Shop all over the news too."

"How come?"

Brad jerked his head towards the TV, upping the volume, which urged Penny to step behind the couch. At the bottom of the screen was tagged "The Stud Shop mystery."

"She saved us," a guy in his twenties was saying in an interview. "Sarah Walker saved us."

The ladies seized their beers and moved to the couch with the rest of them.

"What's that about?" Penny asked.

"This guy was inside," Brad explains, pointing at the interviewee. "And he says Sarah Walker did some martial arts thing—"

"Jazz kwon?" Penny asked.

"Probably more like krav maga," Jane said.

"Perhaps," Brad said, skeptically. "Anyway, it's making quite the buzz because it doesn't add up with the official police report."

"That's weird," Penny said. "Ellie and Sarah didn't mention anything about that." She glanced at Max for confirmation.

"Actually," he said, "they didn't really talk about it at all. Even when we mentioned it."

"Uh."

"I've heard about it at my truck too," Dave said. "There're tons of rumors on the streets."

"Like what?" Alex asked.

"Fan stalking, mostly," Dave said. "One rumor's about music espionage and Amy leaving the band."

"Sarah Walker is a spy?!" Alex said.

"No," Dave said. "That's not—"

"Maybe, she is," Max said. "Maybe she's undercover in the music industry."

"Why would she be undercover in the music industry?" Penny said.

"Why else?" he replied. "Drugs."

"Duh," Brad agreed. "She could be a DEA agent."

"I bet Carina's one too. She's sneaky," Max said. "I'm telling you."

"You guys, come on," Penny said. "That's ridic."

"Well," Jane said, drawing out the world. That couldn't be good. "What did you see exactly when you got there?"

Penny swore Jane was two questions away from taking out a notepad, and interrogating her.

"Nothing," Penny said, and reconsidered immediately knowing Jane wouldn't let it go. "I mean, the shop was completely restricted. I couldn't approach. The police told me there'd been a fight between two customers. Sarah saw me outside. She said Ellie was helping a customer who got a minor injury from debris or something. She went to fetch Ellie. They came back escorted by a cop. That's about it."

"That sounds like a lot of security for a simple altercation between two customers," Dave said.

"I guess," Penny replied, "but the place really looked bad. The two guys must really have gone at it."

"If," Max said, "they were even customers."

Penny rolled her eyes.

"Could be the mafia," Brad said. "What?" he added when he got side-eyes, "we're in Chicago."

"Maybe Sarah's in witness protection!" Alex said.

"What, now?"

"She's a world renowned pop star, Alex," Jane said.

"So?"

"Come on, stop it," Penny said. "Sarah didn't do anything, and you're not mentioning your strange theories tonight. Awesome and Ellie are the perfect neighbors, let's not weird them out."

"They are quite awesome," Dave said.

"Yeah," everybody agreed.

"They're almost too perfect," Max said.

"Could be aliens," Alex said.

"Right, my neighbors are aliens," Penny said, before taking a sip of her beer. She needed to check that there wasn't LSD in their drinks or something. What was up with the crazy theorizing? The CAT Squad and Penny's neighbors were pretty much perfect human beings, but still.

"Wait!" Jane said, her eyes big with excitement. "We're not mentioning our theories to whom? Are we seeing Sarah Walker tonight?"

"Oh, I didn't tell you?" Penny said.

"No," everybody but Max replied.

Penny waited to increase the suspense, but she couldn't control herself for very long. "We're partying with the CAT Squad after the concert!"

Various cries, high fives, jumping around, and all around excitement ensued—which Max and Penny, although they had already done this as soon as they'd left the Woodcomb home earlier, were glad to repeat. Dave was the only one still sitting when the gang settled down. Penny had to wonder once again what was wrong with him? How he could not be ecstatic at the idea of spending a night of with the CAT Squad was beyond her.

After a few minutes, Penny took a breath, and said, "Sarah's awesome—"

"Duh," Alex, Brad, Jane, and Max cut off.

"—but Carina is insane, and I think we really hit it off. We're gonna have a hella time tonight, bitches."

"Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking?" Max said, looking at everybody, one after the other.

"Hell yes!" Jane said.

Uh-oh. They both had their crazy eyes on.

"Tonight, we have the opportunity to shed light on…" Max paused, and Jane slightly bounced on her seat, making a high-pitched noise. Adopting a movie trailer announcer voice, Max resumed talking, "the Stud Shop mystery."