Stay, a harry potter fanfic

Stay.

I've been sitting here staring, at the clock on the wall.
And I've been laying here praying, praying she won't call.
It's just another call from home,
You'll get and be gone,
And I'll be crying…

It's nine a.m. The only sound in the room is the methodical ticking of the clock I'm staring intently at and the deep breathing coming from his chest. Five minutes pass. I turn my face away from the clock on the mantelpiece to stare at my lover.

His pale skin is tight across the muscles on his torso and arms. He moves with such grace, even though he's only sleeping, it takes my breath away. His face has a slight pink glow as the morning sunlight falls on it, making his platinum eyelashes shine, illuminating his perfectly sculpted cheekbones. His hair is a tangled mess of white-gold locks, strewn across his pillow.

It's been two years. Two years of sneaking around, hiding in one place then another and another. Never letting anyone know who you're seeing and where you disappear to almost every other weekend. The first time we met up, he gave me a bouquet of pure white roses and a single red one in the middle. All because you're the mistress of a married man.

"You can stop staring at me now, I'm sure you've realised I'm beautiful," Draco's mouth curled into his signature smirk as he twisted round to face me.

I stared deep into his silver eyes, like molten mercury.

"You have to go soon…" I trailed off knowing how sad and pathetic I must have looked and sounded.

As if on cue, an owl fluttered through the open window and dropped a note on Draco's toned stomach. The letter was from Astoria, his devoted wife, asking him to come home soon as his 'business meeting' was finished.

"Don't worry love, we'll see each other in… three days o.k.? I'll come to you this time," He gave me a long kiss and a quick smile he through back the covers, briefly letting me revel in his naked glory, and began to get dressed. Whereas, I just sat in the bed, watching him leave me once again. Within twenty minutes he was dressed and packed, ready to Apparate home.

"I love you 'Mione. You make me happier the Astoria ever could or can," He gave me another smile and kiss before he disappeared with a loud crack that echoed around the now slight bedroom.

"I love you too Draco…" I whispered to the vacant room staring at the he had so recently occupied. Treacherous tears started to fall, and as I lay my head down on his still warm pillow, I wept for my lover, his wife and my painfully splintered heart.

And I'll be begging you baby,
Beg you not to leave.
But I'll be left here waiting, with my heart on my sleeve.
For the next time we'll be here,
Seems like a million years,
And I think I'm dying…

What do I have to do to make you see?
She can't love you like me…

Three days later, and someone is knocking insistently on the door to my flat.

I've lived here for ten years but for the first two years, I lived with Harry and Ron. Then when Harry up and married Ginny, I lived with Ron for another year till he married Lavender Brown. She's a bit of a twit but you can tell how much she and Ron love each other just by looking at them. Harry and Ginny have had their first child, James Sirius Potter, and are expecting their next one in four months who will be called Albus Severus. Lavender is also pregnant and only a month away from the birth. They are going to have a baby boy as well called Jonathon Fred Weasley. Lavenders family had been killed in the War so when Ron's family found out, Molly burst into hysterics clutching Arthur, George cried for his lost brother and the rest of us stood their silent and shell-shocked before the celebrations started. Andromeda and Teddy thanked Ron and Lavender for naming their child Jonathon and said the Remus and Tonks would be so proud and grateful to them. I was well and truly touched and a little bit surprised when they asked me to be Godmother.

As I opened the door, a dishevelled looking Draco Malfoy ran straight past me to land on the sofa, head in his hands muttering like a madman.

"You're early Draco, What's wrong?" I asked quietly. I sat next to him, pulled his soft, pale hands away from his head and clasped them in my petite, tanned ones.

"I don't want to tell you but I think I should."

"Tell me then, it can't be that bad."

"I think Astoria knows about us."

The silence was deafening.

"Are you sure, why do you think that?" I asked in a whisper as though there was a spy hidden in my living room.

"I don't know but I intend to find out. I'm sorry love but this means we can't see each other for a while," He looked at me with his grey eyes, storm-like with something between anger, pain and confusion.

"Don't worry; I'm sure we'll be together again soon. I know it," My fake smile must have looked convincing as a small one of his own appeared on his aristocratic face. He kissed me long and hard, before he got off the sofa and walked slowly towards the door.

"Draco…" I started to say but he cut across me.

"I know love. I know," Another sad smile played across his pale features before he walked out of the door.

But he didn't know.

He didn't know that every time he left, my heart shattered. In fact, the amount of times he had left me now, my heart just stayed shattered. It couldn't piece itself back together anymore.

Why don't you stay?
I'm down on my knees.
I'm so tired of being lonely,
Don't I give you what you need?
When she calls you to go,
There is one thing you should know:
We don't have to live this way.
Baby why don't you stay?

"Draco, stay please, just stay a bit longer," I pleaded.

Once again I sat in bed watching him get dressed to leave again.

"'Mione, I can't. I've already stayed an hour longer than I should have. I have to go," Draco said whilst wrestling a shoe out from under my bed.

It had been a month since we had been together and Draco realised that Astoria did not know he was having an affair. We had spent the last four days in my bedroom only leaving when we literally started to starve. But now Draco's 'conference' was over and he was running late.

"'Mione, Astoria and I have a function to go to in three hours but she said she needs to talk to me about something first o.k.? I promise just another week and we'll be together again," Draco pleaded with me.

I could never resist when his face was all sad and his eyes were all hypnotic like they were right now. I nodded meekly, giving up. He planted a kiss on my forehead and Disapparated. 'There goes my heart' I thought, because as he left, it felt as though someone had ripped it out of my chest.

You keep telling me baby,
There will come our time.
When you will leave her arms,
And forever be in mine.
Well I don't think that's the truth,
And I don't like being used,
And I'm tired of waiting…
It's too much pain to have to bear,
To love a man you have to share…

Hermione,
Not long now and I promise to be with you soon and forever onwards. I am trying to find a way to divorce Astoria so we can be together truly. I promise to see you soon.

You have my heart,
Draco

Draco wrote this letter to me ten months into our relationship. I keep it in the top drawer in my writing desk so that I always have a part of him near me. But now…I don't believe what he wrote. None of it happened and the worst part:

I don't have his heart.

But he has mine. And I fell as if he is squeezing all the life out of it, out of me.

I don't know what to do anymore.

I just don't.

"You have to go," I whispered to him as he held me.

"I know love. And I'm sorry but I can't see you next week. Astoria has an appointment and she wants me to go with her," He truly looked sorry.

"It's fine Draco. She's your wife." My face twisted into a bitter smile at my words,"If she needs you, go with her. We'll see each other another time."

"If you're sure love? O.K. I'll see you soon 'Mione," Once again, he left. I swung my legs off the bed to go have a shower and I trod on something dark and shiny. Picking it up, I realised it probably fell out of Draco's trousers. I looked at it closely.

It was a sonogram.

I can't take it any longer
But my will is getting stronger,
And I think I know just what I have to do.
I can't waste another minute,
After all that I put in it.
I've given you my best,
Why does she get the best of you?

So next time you find,
You wanna leave her bed, for mine…

"Why didn't you tell me?" I was shouting at him as I had been for the past half hour.

"It didn't matter. I was leaving her for you!" Draco shouted back.

"Oh well, then that's alright!" I shrieked sarcastically, "You don't leave your pregnant wife Draco!"

"I don't love her Hermione! I love you!"

"It doesn't matter. You're having a child together! If you were leaving her, you would have left sooner!"

"I tried Hermione, I really tried. The day she told me, was the day I was going to file for divorce papers," He threw his hands in the air, exasperated.

We stared at each other, silent except for the sound of our shallow breathing from our shouting match.

"I can't do this anymore Draco," I whispered, thinking he wouldn't hear me.

He did.

"What are you saying 'Mione?" He looked pained, as if he already knew the answer.

"I'm saying that this is too hard. I have given you everything I have but you're the only one on the receiving end. And I have nothing left to give you now. It hurts too much for you to come and go like this. My heart is in splinters and I can't put it back together while you're in my life. You have to let me heal Draco."

By the time I had finished, silent tears streamed down both our faces.

"Just go Draco. I love you too much to make you stay. Go back to your pregnant wife and make sure your child grows up with a father who loves him. Go."

Not wanting to make this harder than it already was Draco left without a word.

Why don't you stay?
I'm up off my knees.
I'm so tired of being lonely,
You can't give me what I need.
When she begs you not to go,
There is one thing you should know:
I don't have to live this way.
Baby why don't you stay?

Three days later I woke up to find a single, pure white rose on my windowsill.