I don't own Teen Titans. I would love to buy it if you have it for sale, though.

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"Why am I doing this? I don't do laundry, I can't even reach the dials on the stupid machine."

Beast Boy was standing in the middle of the hall staring at a large basket of clothing, all of which belonged to Starfire. The basket was probably big enough so that he could climb inside and create an awesome fort, he decided. Maybe that would get him moving. Empty the basket, and he would have the most amazing fort ever. He straightened himself up and glanced around before wrapping his arms around the basket. With a deep breath and a heave, he picked it up and headed for the elevator. He couldn't figure out why the laundry room had to be on the tower's ground floor, considering everyone's rooms were on the fifth floor. He slowly trudged onward, and didn't even falter when Silkie emerged from the clothing and leapt dramatically to the floor. The elevator doors suddenly loomed before him, and he didn't want to put the basket down to press the button for fear of never being able to pick it back up. He looked around and wondered where everyone was. How was he supposed to do this by himself?

"Stupid laundry. Stupid elevator," he mumbled quietly.

He rolled his eyes enthusiastically before straining to raise one purple boot. With an almost painful grunt, he kicked the button on the wall and silently cheered when it turned a bright yellow. Now he just had to wait. And wait. And wait…

"Gee, it's not like I'm holding fifty pounds of skirts or anything, oh no. It's not like they're all sweaty and gross and smell like a giant silk worm. That would make this a whole lot harder, good thing it isn't what I'm doing."

He furrowed his brow in frustration. This was stupid. Laundry day was stupid. The elevator was there. The elevator was there. It was there?

Beast Boy struggled a little before finally making his way through the elevator doors. Before he could make it all the way in, the doors closed tightly around the basket, and crushed his fingers.

"Dammit!"

He began to fight the elevator doors, and he was absolutely sure they were fighting him back.

---

Cyborg whistled happily as he headed toward the elevator. He had just returned from his afternoon patrol, and it was right about time to rustle up some kind of awesome meat-filled meal. The day had been going pretty well for him so far, he had woken up and won another argument with Beast Boy over meat vs. tofu (apparently shoving his fake eggs down the sink counted as winning), then he had played the Gamestation for four solid hours while Robin tried to teach Starfire that cooking brownies does not, in fact, involve copious amounts of poppy seeds, and then he had two quiet hours to work by himself in his garage, he had a revitalizing lunch break, and then headed out for a quick and smooth patrol where nothing had been out of place and there was no mischief to be made. Today was a fine dandy day, if he did say so himself.

Behind him was Robin, who was carrying four bags of groceries. "Somebody has to do it," he'd said.

Cyborg pressed the button beside the elevator door and kept on whistling. Robin stood quietly beside him.

"So, Cyborg…how's it going?"

"Pretty good, man, pretty good…" he trailed off.

They both continued waiting patiently. Robin struggled to pull back his glove and peek at his watch from behind the bags of food.

"Man, what's up with this? It's never taken this long before, has it?"

Robin looked a bit confused. "I don't know, maybe something's wrong with it? You pressed the button all the way, right? Sometimes it does that thing where…"

"Nah, I pressed it pretty good. What do think is taking so long?"

Suddenly there was a loud crash followed by chalk board scraping, which was followed by total silence. Robin raised his mask at Cyborg, who shrugged back. There was a quiet "ding", and the doors opened. Inside was a very disgruntled Beast Boy straining to hold a humongous laundry basket. Behind him, the walls were dented and claw marks had shredded the soft blue carpeting. Neither Cyborg or Robin said anything as he struggled to remove himself from the elevator, preferably before the doors tried to eat him again. He did not prevail, and the doors shut on him once more. He let out a growl and morphed himself into a gorilla, using his giant palms to force the doors apart. Finally, he made it out, laundry basket in tow.

"Why didn't I just do that in the first place…" he said to himself.

Cyborg just stared at the wrecked elevator, fearing a lengthy repair time. Robin, eyes wide beneath his mask, basically pinned Beast Boy to the wall with a blank stare.

"It's my turn to do laundry."

"Ooooh."

All was made clear to them. Everyone (the guys) hated and rued the day when the time would come for their turn to do the laundry. From struggling to get all four laundry baskets down the stairs, to actually having to do the laundry of the female members of the team, all was pure terror.

"Maybe we should help you," Robin said. He put his bags of groceries down.

"I might as well pitch in too. Seeing as how I never do it anyway." Cyborg didn't have to take a turn doing the laundry, on the grounds that he had no laundry himself. They figured it wouldn't be fair to him.

"Thanks you guys, this really sucks."

Cyborg grasped the rim of the basket and lifted it with one hand, nearly pulling Beast Boy up with it. He let go and dropped to the ground with a sigh of relief.

"Dude, I think I pulled my funny bone."

The three of them waited quietly.

"Oh, okay, well if Raven were here, she'd say 'Dude, you never even had a funny bone', except without the 'dude' part. Is it weird that we all expect that kind of thing now…?"

"Nah."

Robin and Beast Boy followed Cyborg quietly down the hallway.

---

The laundry room was dark, dank, and smelled pretty terrible. The boys had opened the door (which always jammed) and treaded lightly down the wooden steps for fear of breaking them. Every creek was yet another terrifying second where you didn't know whether or not you would make it to the washing machine without breaking something in the process. They finally touched down on the cold cement floor, all letting out breaths they knew they had been holding. Already sitting in front of the washer were three much smaller baskets of laundry in varying colors. Beast Boy had always wondered why the Tamaranian girl needed so many outfits, while he, Robin, and Raven only needed enough for the week. It just didn't make any sense how she could go through more than three pairs of clothes in a single day, but nobody had gotten around to questioning her.

"Hey Cy? Why is the laundry room so awful looking anyway? You did the plans, why is the rest of the tower so awesome? This place is pretty dull."

"It was an afterthought. What? I don't ever worry about clothes, a laundry room was not on my list of things to do."

Cyborg and Robin began sorting the laundry into two other baskets, one for lights and one for darks. Beast Boy just wanted to sit down and rest his tired legs, but he instead decided to finish his job. Laundry day was no laughing matter, and he had no intention of turning it into one. Sorting the clothes was not that difficult; they all wore dark outfits with the exception of Starfire, but they sorted her clothes anyway. Not a word passed between them when they sorted the unmentionables. Obviously if both Raven and Starfire trusted them enough to do their laundry, then they were going to have to be mature about it and suck it up. Besides, they owed that much to the girls for suffering through clothes that Beast Boy just seems to find around his room, most of which have been sitting where they were for a undetermined amount of time.

They finished, and Beast Boy shoved all of the darker clothes into the washing machine. He then stopped and looked at Cyborg, obviously expecting something. He made an 'I'm waiting' gesture with his hands. Cyborg looked clueless for a moment before realizing.

"Oh, man, you can't even reach the dials! How do you do this when we aren't here?" He reached over and set the machine before turning it on, the drone of the washer starting it's cycle filling the air.

"It takes me a really long time."

"Oh."

The watched the washer spin the clothes for what seemed like minutes before Robin spoke up.

"Um, hey guys? I think we missed something." He pointed to the floor slowly.

There on the ground were the brightest, pinkest, most obnoxious pair of tiny underwear any of them had ever seen. Splashed across the front of them was a light pink unicorn, obviously in a majestic rearing position. This was unlike anything any of them had ever seen before, and they weren't really sure what to do.

"Should we…pick them up?" Beast Boy held his hands to his chest in a frightened manner.

"I don't know, man, they look pretty messed up. Maybe we can just shove them under the washer."

Robin was wide-masked and thinking fast. "I don't think the question is 'what do we do with them'. I think what we really should be asking is, who do they belong to?"

"Well they can't be Star's, all she wears is purple. We all know that," Cyborg stated.

"Agreed," Robin said calmly. "But then that would mean…"

"No way dude, Raven only has blue underwear. I mean, what? I mean, I know that because I do her laundry, not because-,"

"I highly doubt Raven would have anything like this, ever. But who else could it be?" Cyborg ignored Beast Boy, who was turning a shade of brown in the face.

"Who else could what be?"

"Ahh!" All three of them jumped at the voice, who turned out to be Raven. She floated down from the doorway, not risking the wooden stairs. The boys collected themselves and Raven came to stand before them. She had on a totally deadpan face, which she used to intimidate each of them in turn.

"What brings you here Rae?"

"Raven, Beast Boy, my name is Raven. There was no yelling or fighting or anything while I was reading. I began to worry. And then I found out the elevator was broken."

Beast Boy jumped the gun. "It wasn't me, I swear! I was just, you know, doing the laundry because it's my turn, and, you know, I just wanted to get it over and done with. But then the elevator was being a jerk and it took me half an hour just to get in and then I finally got downstairs, but the elevator still hated me and Robin and Cyborg were there and I was a gorilla. Anyway, we got the laundry and took it down here and we had to walk down the stairs and then we made it and we sorted the laundry and put it in and turned it on and then we thought we were done. But then there were those," He pointed to the unicorn underwear, "and we can't figure out who they belong to because Starfire only wears purple and your underwear are all blue and then there was a voice and we looked and it was you and now you're here and I am talking to you, am I being too loud?"

Raven looked at him incredulously.

"Beast Boy, today was my turn to do the laundry. Remember the day when you slept all day and missed three missions? That was yesterday. That was when you were supposed to do the laundry. But you were sleeping, and we made the mistake of not waking you up. I volunteered to do it today. I guess you missed that memo, huh?"

"I..what? I mean, you took my laundry day for me? I mean, yeah, sure. Thanks Rae. Raven. Yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. But there was still a matter at hand.

Robin looked thoughtful for a moment before turning his gaze back to the pink underwear. "And those-,"

"Belong to Jinx. I don't think she would appreciate you staring at her undergarments. Especially since she thought it was me who was going to wash them. And in case you didn't catch that, that was me implying that if you ever tell anyone about them, you will all die."

Cyborg shuffled nervously. "Of course."

"Good. Now Cyborg, you can go fix the elevator, Robin can go put the groceries away before Silkie finds them, and Beast Boy- You can finish doing the laundry. All of it."

Robin and Cyborg were quick to escape. Raven, hands on her hips, watched them sprint up the stairs they would otherwise have tiptoed upon. She turned her gaze back to Beast Boy, who had his eyebrows raised.

"You know, you'd make a great mom."

"That's nice, Garfield. Now do your laundry."

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Silly Beast Boy, Raven's underwear aren't for- wait…