A/N: I don't own Castle or any of the characters. Just a fangirl :) This is my 1st fanfic, so be nice!

Hope you enjoy! Reviews are appreciated

She was soaked as the pouring rain pounded insistently on her skin, giving her the chills. Her silken white dress dragged behind her, torn and ragged. Wet mascara tears ran down her flushed cheeks, runny black streaks mingling with the salty streams and the pitter patter of the raindrops. And as she ran across the stormy streets of New York City, Kate Beckett wondered if she was doing the right thing.

3 months ago

Richard Castle knew it. Kate Beckett was the one. His one and only love, his soulmate. It had taken him a while, almost three years to be sure, but now it he knew it. All those moments they had over the years, the flirtatious jokes, the finishing of each other's sentences, the times he had saved her life and vice versa, the kiss they shared undercover, they all added up to an undeniable equation. She was the one. Now all he had to do was tell her how he felt.

That was the problem. He had never really been able to summon up the courage to do so. Maybe it was the fear of her rejection, or the fact that things might change between them, regardless of her answer. Their 'relationship' was fragile to say the least, and he didn't want to do anything to ruin that.

But deep down, Castle knew that one day he would have to be brave and tell her. Don't wait till it's too late, or you may just lose her to someone else. He took a deep breath, and walked up the stairwell to Beckett's apartment.

He heard voices inside, a gentle murmuring, quiet whispers. Must be Josh. That boyfriend of her's was always in the way, the core of every interruption. He sighed, and stood in a corner, biding his time. Curious, he stood against the glass panel of the door, pressing his ear against it. Through the corner of his eye, he saw them, cuddled up on the couch, watching a romantic movie. He didn't mean to eavesdrop, but it just kind of happened. Then he saw it. The little velvet box, the flash of the diamond ring. In torturous slow motion he heard the fatal words of "will you marry me", and the excited squeal of a "Yes!". And with that, Richard Castle's heart plummeted to the floor, shattering into tiny little pieces.

"Lanie! Lanie!" Kate Beckett was all excitement as she phoned her best friend.

"Girl, what is with you today? So hyper..."

"He proposed Lanie! He proposed!"

Kate was deafened by an excited, high pitched squeal from the other end.

"Ok, you are coming out for coffee, and that is that."

As she sat in the cafe, Lanie felt her excitement bubbling up inside of her. Wow, Beckett getting married, and to Motorcycle Boy. She never thought she would see the day. As Kate walked into the cafe, she shook her head like a proud parent, and ran over to give her best friend a bear hug.
"Everyone, my friend here just got engaged!" Lanie paraded round the now extremely red Beckett.
She gently chatised her friend as they sat down. Then out came the ring. A simple gold band, a sparkling diamond set in the center. There was a hush.

"Awwwww honey, it's gorgeous"

"Lanie?"

"Yeah?"

"I was wondering if, if you wanted to be my maid of honor...?"

Lanie gasped, and happy tears pooled in her eyes.

"Girl, I would be honored"

They sat in companionable silence, until Lanie decided to broach the subject that had been bothering her for a while.

"Hey, what exactly are you gonna do about Writer Boy?"

Kate looked defeated. "Why is it that everyone asks me that question. Me and Castle, we're just friends"

Lanie gave her a meaningful stare "It sure doesn't look that way."

Kate sighed "I guess maybe we are a little more than friends, but how does it matter now? I mean, I'm getting engaged and everything"

"Well, if you don't want your 'friendship' to end, you have to at least talk to him about this. You owe him that much"

As Kate Beckett came into the precinct, she was greeted by a scream of "Congratulations!" from all her colleagues. Awww Lanie she thought, half-smiling, I thought I told you not to tell. As the detectives 'Oooh'ed and 'Ahh'ed over her shiny new engagement ring, the Captain grabbed her by the arm, a tear in his eye.

"Detective Beckett, I never thought I would see the day. As a wedding present, I am forcing you to take all of your sick days and use them up."

"But sir-"

"No arguments Detective, you deserve it" he said, a smile on his face.

Kate was so caught up in the celebration that she almost didn't notice Castle coming in.

The precinct was in full celebration mode as Castle came in, coffee in hand. He spotted Beckett in a corner, all the ladies gushing over her diamond engagement ring. A single glance at the sparkling jewel was enough to make him glum. He avoided the ever-increasing hoard of giggling girls, instead choosing to settle in his usual chair, mulling over angsty thoughts. A large banner titled 'The future Mrs Josh Davidson' hung over his head, enveloping him in his misery.

As she approached, he plastered on a cheery smile.

"Hey, congratulations!"

"Thanks"

Her tone was quiet, somewhat subdued.

"Listen Castle, I just wanna make sure everything is okay with us, you know, no awkwardness over my engagement or anything"

"...Uh yeah it's fine, why wouldn't it be?"

For a moment,their eyes met, and her sharp green eyes pierced through his fragile, faux-cheerful facade, shattering all illusions of happiness, the raw vulnerability and sadness in his soft blue eyes left exposed.
He reached out took her hand, mesmerized by her touch.
"Look Kate, all I've ever wanted is for you to be happy. If Josh makes you happy, then you should marry him." As he walked away, Kate Beckett felt more confused than ever.