.. Hi! I know, I know, me = terrible FanFictioner! But I. Am. BACK! This one is about Zora. She doesn't get the credit she deserves, to be honest. This is a sad little look into Zora's life, so it doesn't actually have a storyline.
~I do not own Sonny With a Chance. But one day I will own Sterling Knight…~
Until then, enjoy! =P
Just a Zora In The Background
Why doesn't anyone ever listen to me? I try to give my ideas, I do, but I'm just the 'silly little 14 year old' in the distance. My cast-mates never stop to think that I'm only 'weird' to get their attention. That I only appear happy because I'm sad inside. That I'm only on So Random! because my parents died, and my sister and I need money to live. They never ask me about my home life, so I never tell them. They don't care about the real Zora Lancaster, so why shouldn't I just be the shadow on the wall? For instance: Sonny – you'd think she'd be her perky, happy self to me…but none of them are. Sonny, Chad, Tawni, Nico, Grady? No one, not even Marshall, cares. They all take advantage of me, they think because I'm the youngest that I'll do anything – like make a fool of myself on TV.
I've had fans come up to me, saying they love my quirky, loving and cheerful personality. I smile, thank them, nod and take pictures – the usual 'celebrity' stuff. But no one will know how I feel inside. No one will know what I do in my spare time, what I do, think and feel outside of my job. No one knows that I cry myself to sleep every night; no one knows my 9 year old sister is dying. She needs an intense operation every month. No one knows my aunt lives with me, but she beats me and Carmen (my sister.) And I don't plan on telling anyone, especially the paparazzi, these things. I don't want fake sympathy. You know Chad and Sonny love each other, right? But they're not going to admit it? That's like me. Apart from I don't love; I hate. I hate my life and my job…and I won't admit it. Ever. Because doing so makes people pretend to like you, pretend to care, pretend to comfort you when you know deep down they don't give a monkeys.
Remember how I said I hate my job on So Random! Yeah, well you'd think everyone would love that job. The fame, fortune, friends … but all I can say is a different f-word. It's miserable for me, to see all the 17 year olds live the life of luxury. There are friendships and relationships between them, there are fights, which is to be expected. None of them blank each other out – except for me. They don't know I exist, and they don't want to know. They don't realise that I have feelings, that all I want is for my sister to live. All they care about is the money and the fame. Their success has wrecked the human beings inside them. Me? I'm wrecked because of my past, not my 'success.' I don't even think of myself as successful. Or talented. I got this job because I went to school with Tawni's sister. Bet you didn't know that.
I don't go out much. I hate my photograph being taken at random points, because they may have taken a picture of me looking miserable. I only smile when I have to. Like filmed Hollywood parties, movie premieres, events, places where I am told to be e.t.c. That's because I know that someone, somewhere will photograph me. And if I'm looking like how I feel inside, the mags will be filled with stories about me. I know what you're thinking, paranoid. But I'm not. Whether Mackenzie Falls likes it or not, So Random! is the most watched kids' show in America and Europe. And I happen to be on that show. Hollywood is strange that way. Most of the time the focus is on the main cast. But if they snag something worth writing about, like me looking like death, they'll print it onto every magazine ever made.
At the start, you were probably thinking how selfish I am for not being grateful. Now do you understand? Now do you know why I don't go out much in public? Now do you know why my smile looks fake? Why I'm never on the show much; Why I don't contribute? Why I'm hardly ever photographed? If you don't, just think a little. I do NOT want this life. I want to be sitting at home, with my sister, praying for her to live. I want my parents alive again, I want my aunt to go back to Scotland. But none of these wishes will ever come true. Because, for the sake of my sister, I need this life. Everyday I want to commit suicide, but I stop myself. And I promise you, I'll be glad when all this is over.
But for now, I'm just miserable, untalented, unrecognised, suicidal little Zora Lancaster.
I know right. Depressing. But I felt the need to express the real Zora. And I could do it in any way, 'cause there isn't much to know about her. Bye :)