A/N – Contains spoilers for Naruto Shippuden (episode. 138 and beyond) Rated T. One-shot, one-sided Narusasu. Please read the rest of the author's note after you read the whole thing! It explains what I was looking to accomplish by writing it, all that fun stuff. I like feedback!
Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto.
Moonlight
A soft kiss, like a petal delicately floating down and settling on the earth, dropped on his forehead.
Another silently landed near his temple...
then on his eyelid.
Lips, feather-soft and barely touching his skin, trailed to the crest of his cheekbone. Warm breath from the other's mouth ghosted over his cheek. The lips slowly trailed down and rested on his jaw.
A warm, wet, teasing tongue flicked out against his skin. He felt teeth lightly graze his flesh. The mouth lingered there, releasing hot puffs of air.
He wanted so badly to turn his head, to bring his own lips closer to the other's. He wanted that heat. But he lay still and waited. He always waited, feeling each sensation, each soft touch.
The mouth brushed against his jaw again and made a path upwards, until it rested just shy of his own. That teasing tongue found the edge of his mouth and dipped into the corner. If he moved his head just a fraction of an inch he could finally feel that heat.
His nerves tingled, and his heart beat fast in his chest. Please, he urged, begged in his mind.
As if hearing his desperate thought, the mouth covered his like a warm, spreading liquid. A tongue swept over his parted lips and delved between them to the inside.
Absolution.
He came alive.
He wrapped his arms and legs around the body above him and clung to the radiating warmth. It was so impossibly warm. Lips mashed together, and tongues slid over and under and over again. Everything was movement and friction and heat.
He couldn't get enough.
He nipped at the lips moving against his own and arched up so that their bodies ground together even more. It was like a driving, raging thirst that could only be satisfied by more contact.
He needed more. More touch, more skin rubbing against skin.
He physically ached for it.
And then it was gone.
/No.../
The hungry cold descended on him.
/No!/
It viciously closed him in, stabbing at him, attacking him.
/No, no, no! Please! Not again!/
And then he remembered that this is what always happened.
The cold always came.
It hurt and stung him.
He couldn't move.
It had crippled him.
The warmth was gone, was never coming back.
/NO!/ he screamed in his mind.
He couldn't speak. He wailed and cried and willed himself to move, to chase after the disappearing warmth. But he was paralyzed. Helpless.
He yelled something. It came out as a pleading, choked sob that was only devoured by the encroaching darkness.
/SASUKE!/
"Sasuke!"
Naruto flung forward, heaving upright in his bed.
/Sasuke! No! Don't leave! Where…/
His thoughts hurtled forward, moved too fast for him to process. He was breathing hard and felt something cool and wet on his face. Blinking rapidly, he stared at the wall in front of him.
/A dream…/ He tried to slow his breathing.
/It was just a dream./
Naruto sat still for a minute to calm his body down. Adrenaline surged through him, and he trembled.
/It was just a dream/ he repeated to himself, trying to force himself to relax.
He looked out his window.
/More like a nightmare./
The moon shone bright and cast a pale light in his room. He wiped his face with the edge of his pajama sleeve and drew in a shaky breath. A tired sigh left his lips.
It had been that dream. He'd been having it at least once a week. Naruto leaned against the wall behind him and stared up at the ceiling.
The person in the dream used to be a mystery. The ending had always stayed the same, though. He would wake up with a strangled gasp or an outright sob. He thought back to the first night…the night he discovered who he was dreaming of. He had woken up, mortified, after realizing whose name he'd cried out into the darkness. The second half of the dream made sense in that respect.
But the first part…
He thought it had been a fluke, a sign of stress after a particularly exhausting string of missions. Dreams were like that after all. Sometimes there was no explanation.
But then it kept happening.
Some nights he yelled the other boy's name when he woke. Other times he would recall flashes of dark hair or remember the unmistakable whisper of Sasuke's voice saying his name. There was nothing random about it. He was having recurrent passionate dream-nightmares about the other boy, and it didn't look like they'd be stopping anytime soon. It seemed they had been triggered by the reappearance of his and Sakura's old team member, standing high on the edge of the newly formed crater.
/That day…/
That's why I severed the bonds.
That's what he had said. The image of Sasuke, their once team-mate, their friend, looking down at them with icy, detached recognition burned behind Naruto's eyes.
Friend. The word was only painful when applied to Sasuke.
That word, combined with his fresh wakening from the dream, brought on a myriad of emotions that all knocked, swirled, and bled into each other into an incomprehensible chaos. It was a war zone of feeling that pushed and pulled him from the inside. That's what he hated most about the dreams. He hated what they left behind. The loss, anger, rage, loneliness, depression, confusion...
The emotions tore at him and left him ragged. All that would be left was a bleeding pain he could not shake off in the stifling quiet of his room.
He just didn't understand.
He didn't understand why Sasuke wouldn't come home, back to Konoha. He had achieved his goal and then some. Both Orochimaru and Itachi were dead. His revenge was complete.
Why didn't he come home then? What else could he be searching for?
These questions were dangerous because these questions inevitably brought on more hurtful ones. Those were the questions that scared him and filled him with doubt.
What if Sasuke never came back?
Naruto clenched the bed sheets tight between his fingers.
/No./
He would bring him back. He had a promise to keep. Sasuke just needed some sense beat into him. The next time he came face-to-face with the other boy, he would not fail. He couldn't afford to fail. /Not just for Sakura-chan, but also for…/
Naruto sighed heavily.
/For me./
He stared down at the blankets, but his eyes didn't see anything.
That question, always the last one on these nights, drug itself from the back of his mind. It was like a slow-acting poison. It waited until all of his defenses had crumbled, until he was left raw and vulnerable...a bleeding gash left open to the elements.
Who knew why Sasuke didn't come back to Konoha, why he didn't come back to his own village.
Who knew why he didn't come back to Sakura-chan's open, forgiving arms, to Kakashi-sensei, to Team 7.
I don't need a future with you guys anymore. The Valley of the End's image flashed in his memory.
I don't need a future with you...
I severed the bonds.
Naruto would never forget those words. They echoed perfectly in his head from the inflection to the emotionless expression Sasuke wore when they had left the other boy's mouth.
/Sasuke…/
Naruto closed his eyes and tried to clear the familiar lump from his throat.
/Sasuke…our future...our bond.../
With that thought, the venomous question rose to the surface. It scratched at a wound that even the kyuubi could not heal...could never heal.
It poised...
and struck.
/Why am I not enough?/
A stifled, wet gasp and two damp spots on the blanket where the tears had fallen from Naruto's face were the only answer.
This is kind of a…study, I guess you could say. I wanted to try and get inside Naruto's head and explore certain feelings I think he would have regarding Sasuke's leaving. I was also aiming to really draw out emotion and imagery with this piece.
Anywho, I am very open to constructive criticism. I mean constructive criticism on everything from grammar to format to style to wording to flow to characterization. You name it! Just try to be polite when you give it, please! You don't have to sugar-coat it. Just don't say something like, "Oh, my GAWD, this is absolute trash, and I hate it, and you should go to hell for your atrocious writing!" At least explain why.
Thanks! :)