Back To December Songfic
My first songfic, about Cabbie. Don't worry, Cabbie lovers, there's always a happy ending in my stories =) P.S. There's a hint about one of my favorite authors in there. I used an idea from their story, and I'll reveal them later.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own this song, its lyrics, or Victorious. I hate having to do that every stinkin' time.
. . . . .
Time is set February 8, after a tragic break-up in December of the past year.
I'm so glad you made time to see me. How's life, tell me, how's your family? I haven't seen them in a while...
Cat heard a faint knock at the door. She stood from the couch and opened the door. "Robbie?" She couldn't believe her eyes. "Hi, Cat. Wow, I haven't seen you in a long time! I almost forgot how red your hair is..." He smiled awkwardly. She smiled, motioning him to the couch.
"How did you like New York?" Cat asked Robbie, walking into the kitchen and getting punch for two. The words were sour on her tongue, as they brought back the memory of that depressing night in December... She shook the thought away, as another question entered her mind. "How's your family? Your sister, and your mom?" She asked sadly.
You've been good, busier than ever. We small talk; work and the weather. Your guard is up, and I know why...
"We've been good. My mom's been really busy with her conferences, and Raquel's getting married in December..." Oh, the irony, Robbie thought. The happiest day of her life will reside in the saddest month of my life.
"I got a new job! I'm feeding dolphins at a water park! They're so nice, and they talk to me a lot! I think I may be part dolphin!" Cat giggled, throwing some of her usual enthusiasm into her speech, even though she felt empty inside.
"Yeah... It's nice to be back in L.A., with the warm sunshine. It's always cloudy in New York." Robbie forced a laugh. He's acting so strange, Cat stifled a sigh, but why wouldn't he?
Because the last time you saw me is still burned in the back of your mind. You gave me roses, and I left them there to die...
Robbie looked into Cat's big, brown eyes. The same eyes that looked so cold and confused that December night...
"Cat, what are you saying?" Robbie held the bouquet of roses out to the love of his life. His red-haired angel. His Valentine. But her dark eyes held tears in them, as she took the roses.
"I'm saying, I don't know what I think about us anymore..." The tears spilled over, and she dropped the roses on the ground, running away in the rain. The New York sky closed over them like a cloak, as he watched her run away, rain soaking her little black dress...
"Well, I do. I know that even though you're confused, I'll never have to think twice about us." Robbie turned and walked away himself. But not before he knelt down and grabbed the one synthetic rose. I'll love her until it dies...
. . . . .
So this is me, swallowing my pride. Standing in front of you, saying I'm sorry for that night. I go back to December all the time.
Cat looked down, her heart in her throat. Should I tell him I miss him? What if he doesn't want me back? Cat could barely hold in her emotions. She had told herself once she had started dating again that she had to be emotionally strong if something like this happened. I don't know if I can, though. I just wish I could tell him...
It turns out, freedom ain't nothing but missing you. Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine. I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right...
Cat wanted to scream out: "I miss you! It was all my fault! And every day, I always go back to that night in December, and wish I could have known what I do now! I love you, Robbie!" But she couldn't. She didn't think her lips would form the words for her.
I go Back To December all the time...
. . . . .
These days, I haven't been sleeping. Staying up, playing back myself leaving.
Cat soaked her bed with tears as she recalled the fateful night. How she had thrown down the roses, those roses, that he had said: "I'll love you until the last one dies!" The last was fake, of course, so he could say he'd love her forever. But I'd never returned the favor...
When your birthday passed and I didn't call...
Cat thought back to his birthday, one short month ago. January 17, to be exact. Everyone was throwing him a party at Tori's house, but she hadn't shown up. She should have, but she didn't.
She was too scared. She knew what she did was wrong, leaving him like that, but she tried to convince herself she had reason. And she knew that if she went to his party, she'd know she was wrong. And she wouldn't know what to do then...
Then I think about summer, all the beautiful times. I watched you laughing from the passenger side, and realized I loved you in the fall...
They were driving through their neighborhood, Cat laughing at Robbie's terrible jokes. She had just earned her driver's license, and was still getting the hang of it. They weren't paying attention, when a dog jumped into the street. Cat swerved out of the way, off the road, and into a ditch, filled with leaves. Of course, it was a convertible, so Cat and Robbie were covered in leaves, neither of them injured. And they laughed, even though they had had to pull the car out of the ditch before they could drive home.
But then, the cold came: The dark days when fear crept into my mind. You gave me all your love, and all I gave you was...
That cold night at Cat's house played through Robbie's mind. A few days before their class left for New York, Robbie stood outside in the cold, waiting for Cat to answer the door. But she had grown aggravated by him, lately, for no apparent reason besides the fact that she wasn't used to a relationship. Her parents abused her and sent her into foster care when she was young, and until a few years ago, she hadn't had a sturdy home. She was new to the concept of love. So she left it out in the cold.
... Goodbye.
. . . . .
So this is me, swallowing my pride. Standing in front of you, saying I'm sorry for that night. I go Back To December all the time...
Robbie instantly felt guilty. Cat never knew love, and when I gave it to her, I expected her to accept it. (At this point, Robbie doesn't know about Cat's family. If you'd like to read about how he finds out, check out my story, Just Keep Running.) I mean, her Dad and Mom never hang out with her, and her brother Matt's a lunatic. She hasn't had a real boyfriend that wasn't squirted with hot cheese; then kissed by her best friend. She doesn't know love. Maybe I should have gone easier on her... Maybe I should give her a chance. But does she want one?
It turns out, freedom ain't nothing but missing you. Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine. I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own life...
I really miss her, Robbie thought. She's not used to this. Maybe I should ask her about getting back together again. She wouldn't bring it up herself... Unless she likes freedom. But for me, it was nothing but wishing I had her back... Yeah, I'd go back to December and change it all. I'd run after her, stop her and kiss her. Kiss her and never let her leave me again.
I go Back To December all the time.
. . . . .
I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile. So good to me, so right. And how you held me in your arms that September night; the first time you ever saw me cry.
Robbie wrapped his arms around the trembling Cat, who had just lost her grandfather. He kissed her head and she clung to him. He knew he couldn't make things any better for her: sitting there in the cold, white room, just receiving the earth-shaking news from a less-than-enthusiastic doctor. Sadly, no one in her family was with her. Just Robbie and Jade. Her closest friends.
She looked up at him, tear-streaked face pale, and felt comfort: In his warmth, in his love, in his smile. She had secretly admired his smile more than most of his features. It was warm and inviting, even in that dreadful hospital room. She never thought for a minute that she would turn that smile into a frown that December...
Maybe this is wishful thinking.
Cat sat there, her hands folded in her lap, looking into the expectant eyes of Robbie Shapiro. And she thought, just for one second...
Probably mindless dreaming...
That maybe, somehow...
But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right.
He could forgive her.
She sat up straight and looked him in the eyes.
"I'd go back in time and change it," Her voice grasped his attention. "But I can't." She took a breath, and looked into his, it seemed, distrustful eyes.
So if the chain is on your door, I understand...
"So this is me, swallowing my pride. Standing in front of you, saying I'm sorry for that night!" She stood up and grabbed his hand with both of hers. "And I go back to December -" She stopped for a second, but swallowed the lump and started again. "It turns out, freedom ain't nothing but missing you! Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine!" He stood up in front of her and stroked her hair.
"I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right..." She breathed heavily after her outburst.
"I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own life..." Robbie brought her close.
"Let's go Back To December, and do it right, this time..." She whispered. He nodded, and they kissed.
Could you guess who it is?
Ans: Converse Yazzie
Thanks for reading my first songfic! Any song requests? Please review!