Throwing Away All My Shoes

With the weight of the world on my shoulders, what else could I do but run?

I had everything: power, looks, and charm. I was heir to the Hikari Group - a massive conglomerate and the economic backbone of the island nation known as Destiny Islands. Nothing was out of our reach. We had a hand in every industry, sway in politics, and influence in the media. There was nothing our immense wealth couldn't do. We were the last step before world domination. To be with me meant having everything.

Yet, in spite of it all, she rejected me.

Her name was Kairi Uchida, a student at the Academy. The Academy was an educational institution for the upper echelons of society. She was accepted by the grace of academic merit. I was Sora Hikari, the undisputed master of the school. Life was easy. I had no rivals and no equal. Every girl wanted me for herself, but she was different.

The first time we met, she glared at me with such disdain that I knew she was something special. Her fiery eyes drew me into an abyss and I was absorbed into her cruel reality. She resisted our oppression and persevered. She was here with a mission, with conviction and purpose.

I was her greatest foe and her biggest admirer. I was the architect behind her humiliation but for what reason did I deign to recognize such a pitiful existence? She was supposed to be beneath me. But whenever she looked at me with contempt, she did something no one else dared to do: challenge me.

She denied my status and everything the Academy stood for. I could not stand idle as she mocked the foundations of her world. She had to be taught a lesson, and since I was a Hikari, nothing would stop me. She became an obsession, an insurmountable obstacle to be overcome. She was beautiful, no doubt about it, but her body was not enough. I desired her mind and soul and more importantly, her heart. I knew I was playing with fire, but she was far too alluring to leave alone.

I got burnt. It didn't matter how much I tortured her. She took it in stride and threw it back twice as hot. Every move I made backfired. She forced me to look hard in the mirror and see myself for the egotistical monster I really was. It dawned on me that I was revolting. A new world was opened to me and from my seat of privilege I felt the sting of shame. I woke up from my opulent stupor a changed man.

Despite my efforts to demonstrate my evolution, she refused to take responsibility for the changes she wrought. It didn't matter what I did, what I said, or what I thought. She despised me to my core. She made that abundantly clear on the one day I bore my soul to her. It was my final desperate bid to convince her otherwise. Instead of accepting my feelings, she crushed them beneath her heel and spat on me.

"Didn't I tell you to leave me alone?" she told me, tone laced in scorn.

"I'm different. I'm not like I was before."

She laughed viciously. "So instead of trying to buy me out, you're going to pretend that you're like the rest of us? Don't you get it? It doesn't matter how much you change because in the end, you'll always be the son of the Hikari Group."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"It means everything. You and I can never be together because I will never, ever, in a million years, accept you. So quit trying. It's not about what you do anymore, it's who you are. Don't you get it? It's impossible. Drop the act, go back to your rich life, and leave me alone."

She had rejected me for everything that I was. I thought I had changed. I thought I understood the value of hard work and acquired empathy for those less fortunate. I guess it was impossible for someone like me to understand. I would only be lying if I said I did.

"What if I gave it all up?" I asked desperately.

She scoffed. "Then it means you're stupid, which is even worse than being spoiled."

"Will you consider me then?"

"Didn't you hear what I just told you?"

"But you didn't say no."

"You'll never give it up anyways."

Who gives up their entire fortune for a single girl? Alas, my bluff became my hand. Maybe it was more out of wounded pride than of a broken heart, but I did the unthinkable: I gave it all up. I detached myself from the estate and set out in the so-called "real world." I found a new home in a shack that was smaller than my previous bedroom closet. I only had enough munny for a couple months of rent and the rest I would have to scrounge up on my own. I took an indefinite leave of absence from the Academy to attend a public school.

To put the final nail in the coffin, I altered my appearance and changed my name. I was no longer Sora Hikari. I was now Vanitas Novo. Maybe I'll be running back to the estate soon enough. Maybe I'm not really cut out for the life of normalcy. Or maybe, just maybe…

Kairi was absolutely wrong about me.