Being Second

by SoulsFire (PulsingSoul)

Part 1

Hi, my new 2-3 chapter one-shot.And for SN1987A, sorry for not giving you the answer you´re waiting for, but my net did not work, you´ll get it soon though, and also, my last chapters in ,Rules are rules, but "

were meant to be a little confusing... Enjoy!

This was it, and it was a lot harder than he had ever imagined it to be. He had chosen this exact restaurant, the same restaurant his parents were in, when they confessed their love to each other, hoping it would bring him luck. You don´t tell the girl you love, how you feel everyday, now do you?

To say he was nervous was an understatement. Shinichi was sure he could solve hundreds of the most dangerous cases, and still never be this nervous. And the fact that Ran just had to wear that beautiful green dress, which kept distracting him, showing off her heavenly figure, was not helping.

,Shinichi, you ok? You seem a little distracted." Ran was looking at him with big eyes, her heart missing several beats once his blue eyes fixated on her. Oh Kami, this was it! So long had she waited to tell him how much she loved him, and she had a pretty good feeling about him returning her affection ...

,OH MY GOD! The boss was just found dead in the elevator! "

... of course, there would be something going wrong. She sighed. Yes, she knew what was going to happen next. Shinichi would jump up, tell her a very good excuse about how he was the only person smart enough to deal with anything related to death, and then he would disappear.

,Ran." She looked up at him, his eyes nervous in front of hers, the fear of her not accepting what he was about to do now, and that was going there and helping, evident in his eyes. She smiled, thinking he would change, thinking that once this was over she would never be second placed after his cases.

How wrong she was to think so...

Why was he here anyway, was he not supposed to be in there, he looked back at the restaurant, confessing his love to her? Shaking his head he figured, he should concentrate more on matters at hand, and getting back to her faster.

He walked confidently into the hall where he presumed the body to be, and then he stopped dead in his tracks. Standing there, only her profile visible, was one of the most gorgeous women he had ever seen. She was dressed in a satin red dress, falling down a few inches above her knees, a cut going up to mid thigh, showing him her creamy skin, the soft fabric hugging her shapely hips, following the flat of her stomach, as well as the swell of her breasts. Two thick straps went over her shoulders, the fabric now revealing the skin of her back, and he suddenly found himself wanting to touch it, to feel the softness of it.

She turned around to him, her honey-blond hair swinging with the movement, her sapphire eyes locking onto his.

,Kudo! What luck to find you here! "

So this was the famous Kudo, she thought... yes, the rumors were very true indeed, he was exceptionally attractive, his tall frame, as well as lean and yet muscular body, she could see the muscles under his midnight blue shirt, his slightly tanned skin, and those piercing blue eyes, eyes which could see any truth . . . yes, the rumors were true indeed, he was surprising.

,What happened inspector? " He asked them, coming closer, looking into the elevator seeing a doctor already examining the body.

,He was shot. Straight through the heart. Died instantly. " Her voice was neutral, calm, no emotion what so ever tainting it, and yet the sound was more beautiful to him than Ran´s laugh.

What did he just think? How could he just think?

,Who was here? " he asked, his other thoughts forgotten.

And so there went 4 hours to the solving of this very case, the woman, who was later introduced to him as Shiho Myano, helping him the whole time, even when he unmasked the killer. She seemed so calm, so confident, and the moment the case was over, he was suddenly afraid, not afraid of now facing Ran, mind you, no, he was afraid of never seeing this woman again.

And yet, she left before he could even say goodbye.

,Ran, I´m sorry, the case just ... " he did not get to finish, she cut him short.

,Never mind Shinichi, after all I will always be second after your cases. "

The nerve of this man! 4 hours he had left her alone, and she had waited, did not wish to order anything else but a coffee so they could very well order everything together, but 4 hours was just too much, too much time to realize there were to many ,could have"´s.

He could have come back telling her it would be late.

He could have called her.

He could have asked her to come.

She could have gone with him.

And that´s when she saw it.

When you love someone, you love the good and the bad, and you try, you truly try to share things with him, to at least have an idea of what it was that made him tick. And she realized that thing which made him tick, it was never her. He could be scared for her, care for her, trust her, and perhaps love her, but never would she be first.

She did not deserve a second place did she? No one did.

,I´m sorry Shinichi, but this will never work. I´ll always be second, a nr. 2 and I don´t deserve that, and you sure don´t deserve a person who would be mad and disappointed in you, because of this. "

She left. Just with those words she left.

Sitting down, he ordered himself a scotch.

He had been so nervous for nothing. Absolutely nothing.

,You know, you can´t drown your sorrows in a glass of scotch. " He looked up at her, his eyes questioning, but she just stood there, unnerved by his scrutiny. She had wanted to leave, after all, her blind date had been the killer, but she could not bring herself to leave. She had seen them, had seen the way his face lit up while walking towards the girl, had seen the rueful smile while he excused himself, and then, had seen his shoulders slump, his eyes suddenly go numb.

She knew that, she had felt that way so many times, and she knew those were times she would have given anything to have a friend. Even though she considered friends useless.

,How do you know, did you try? " he leaned back in his seat, motioning for her to have a seat, a cynical smile playing on his lips.

,You could say that. " She smirked back at him, sitting down in front of him, her eyes never leaving his.

,She left me. " He said after a while, looking at his glass, watching how the scotch glided over the ice.

,She said she was my second choice. Can you believe that? I never loved another, and yet she was a second choice. " His tone was bitter, the bitterness of a left lover.

, How? How was she my second choice? Did I ever lay eyes on someone else? Did I ever care about someone else as I care for her? Does she not know that I could live with everything being taken away from me, as long as I have her? We were best friends, we always were. And as we grew up, I knew she was going to be the only one I would ever love, how could she leave me? "

She had listened patiently, knowing he actually did not want an answer, but now, she needed to tell him.

,How can you be sure you love her? She was, as far as I understand, the only one to show you more than just friendship, but, if you never knew love, how can you be so sure, it was her, you will ultimately love? " He looked up at her soft whisper, her eyes showing him the wisdom of . . . he could not tell, but he knew, knew, that just as he had been born with the intelligence to solve cases, she had been born with the wisdom to now advise him.

,If you never knew love, till her, how can you be sure, it is love, which binds you to her? I´m not saying this to somehow make you doubt, I am saying this, so that, somehow you realize that what was meant to be, will be, no matter who you are, how strong you are, or how smart you are, and perhaps, with her, it was not meant to be. "

With that she stood. His eyes still fixated on hers. It was extraordinary, how her eyes could stay that cold and her words still be that warm. Could her eyes ever smile? Did she ever smile? Did she speak out of personal experience? And even more so, was she right?

,To what was she second then ? " He asked her smiling, his smile so sincere and yet sad, it made even her eyes sparkle a bit.

,That, you should know better, Kudo. " With that even she left, while he was still looking into his drink.

,It´s Shinichi, Shiho. " He called after her, her name rolling off his tongue like liquid silk.

Turning around, she smiled at him, this time a smile which reached her eyes.

, I know. "