Don't let go of the things you believe in…
By: Kana
"Don't let go of the things you believe in…"
He has always lived by that sentence. Never once has he abandoned the idea. Not even when it seemed to be an impossible thing to come true. He has always fought for his dreams, for what he believed in. Always…
His eyes are closed. The sun is shining on his face. It's like a gentle caress.
A soft sigh escapes his lips. He's tired. So tired. Tired of waiting, tired of trying, tired of fighting…
He had never imagined that it would hurt so much. Letting go of a dream, an impossible one for that matter. His mind tells him that it is the best. It was hopeless to begin with anyway. However his heart is ripped apart by the decision.
-
"Fujiko… Are you alright?"
He smiles when he hears the worried voice of his best friend. He doesn't mean it though. The upward curving of his lips is only to reassure the acrobat.
"Of course Eiji."
He knows the red head has seen through his smile. After all, Eiji knows him…
"Iie… You're not."
The tensai simply looks at his friend. His eyebrows raised in amusement and a questioningly look in his blue eyes.
"You're avoiding Buchou…"
The enjoyment dies on his face and even the fake smile vanishes.
Eiji's voice holds a warning. However he doesn't need it. He wasn't planning on denying it. After all, everybody can seethat. But only the acrobat can know what it means. Theyare best friends. They don't have secrets for each other…
"Are you giving up…?"
It's a gentle whisper and the hand that squeezes his shoulder is warm and comforting.
"I can't keep on fighting for something that is so plainly impossible…"
Their eyes lock and Fuji knows he needs to say nothing more. Eiji knows. He knows how much the decision hurts. How much he loves their captain. How much his unresponsiveness hurts.
The red head sadly shakes his head and opens his mouth to argue. But the tensai's fingers on his lips make him swallow the words he wants to say.
"I love him enough to let him go…"
They set themselves down on the grass. The red head's presence next to him is comfortable. There are no awkward silences between them.
"Tell him…"
Shocked Fuji looks up. His friend's eyes are glittering with mischief.
"You love risks, a challenge. Well… This is both…"
Eiji's face turns serious again.
"No, honest Fujiko… You should tell him. For both your sakes…"
The tensai turns his head away, his eyes closed again.
"Iie. Me confessing might ruin our friendship. I won't allow that to happen. It means too much too me. I won't let my selfishness take that away. I'll get over the fact that I can't have his love like that. Give me a couple of days and I'll be able to act like usual around him again…"
Sighing the acrobat lets his head rest against the tree behind them.
"He asked me yesterday… He does notice you know. That you avoid him. He's worried for you Fujiko. And I think your actions right now are hurting him. He might not say it, or even show it, but I think he likes your attention, your presence by his side…"
Had he been looking at his friend, he would have seen the amusing smile.
He doesn't speak, knowing he isn't expected to.
"I mean it Fujiko…"
He looks up when he hears the acrobat next to him rise.
"… Tell Buchou how you feel."
Flashing the tensai an encouraging smile, he walks away. Leaving his friend to wonder what the twinkle in his eyes meant.
He finds out some seconds later. His eyes widen and he knows fear is clearly written on his face.
"Tezuka…"
His voice is but a mere murmur. The tennis captain's eyes are also wide open. Surprise shining on his face.
Fuji jumps up and whispers a quick "Gomen" while bowing slightly, before he straightens up and runs away.
How can he ever face him again? What was Eiji thinking? Why did he have to fall in love? Why was everything so difficult?
A strong hand catches his wrist and makes him stop in his run. His breathing is heavy. Not because he ran, because his condition is perfect, but because of the emotions and the tears that have escaped his eyes.
Tezuka has always been faster than him. So, in fact it doesn't surprise him when his captain catches up with him. What does surprise him is the fact that Tezuka has run after him. And what even shocks him is when he feels arms slip around him and his Buchou's head that rests against his shoulder blade.
"Te…zuka…"
His voice shivers and he notices he's trembling a little.
"Don't… Don't run away from me. Kikumaru is right. I was worried. And you were wrong. Our friendship is strong enough. It won't break because of how you feel."
The embrace loosens and hesitantly the tensai turns to face Tezuka.
"I can't say the same… For the simple reason I've never thought about it. But I can tell you this: You mean more to me than anyone ever will. So… Give me some time… Perhaps soon I'll be able to return your feelings…"
Fuji's face is back to normal: eyes closed and a smile gracing his lips. He nods once before tip toeing and lightly brush his lips over Tezuka's.
"I'll wait…"
And in his mind he adds: 'Forever, if I have too.'
He believes in his dreams again…
The End.