A/N. Kay, so I was listening to this song and this just sorta came to me. R&R please. Go easy on me.. its my first one.
Summary: James has finally given up on Lily… just as she realizes that she doesn't want him to. Or has he? Songfic.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
She felt her heart skip a beat. 'Could it be him?' she thought. Lily Evans knew someone was looking at her. Not that she saw them staring, it was more of a feeling. She turned around, hoping against hope that he would be standing there, looking at her, the way he used to. She turned around, the hope shining on her face, only to be replaced by a look of utter disappointment. Lily felt her heart sink. No one was there. 'When did I start to miss him?' she asked herself. Lily heard herself answer 'The moment he went away.'
It's that feeling that some one is standing behind me. And, I turn around and there's no one there.
Just before Lily turned around, a boy with raven black hair, circular glasses, and hazel eyes, disappeared around the corner and whispered, "I love you, Evans." Lily whipped back around, hope glinting in her emerald green eyes. She swore she heard his voice. But, again, no one was there, and Lily's face fell. She mentally shook herself. 'Lily Evans, you're the one who would never give him the time of day. You cannot blame him for moving on. You've got to stop imagining that James Potter is behind you at all times. He's not, and he will never be again.' With that she walked off, ignoring the feeling that someone was watching her.
James Potter watched her go, wishing that the hope in her beautiful, green eyes had been meant for him.
And, it's the sensation that someone just whispered. Yeah, I still hear your voice but your not really there. Your memory's like a ghost and my heart is its host.
AsLily walked away, she thought back to a month before, when James Potter had asked her out, yet again. As per usual, she said no, more out of habit then anything else. As the words came out of her mouth, she saw the glimmer of laughter leave his eyes, even as he continued to smile. She wondered if that had always happened. Then, without warning he had swooped down and kissed her. Before she knew what she was doing, Lily had pulled away and slapped James. This time, there was no smile on his face, just hurt. "Point taken. I won't bother you ever again. And, that is a promise." As he started to walk away, he turned around and said "I've done everything for you. What more do you want?" As he ran up the stairs, Lily tried to feel relieved, but she couldn't. She felt terrible. Thinking back, she felt the hurt that was constantly tugging at her heart these days. She could still feel the way his lips had felt against hers. She wanted to feel that again.
James walked towards his dormitory, remembering when he had decided to give up on her, right after she had slapped him for kissing her. He could still feel the way her lips felt against his. He thought back to when her so-called "best friend" had called her a mudblood back in fifth year. She had reacted coolly, showing no emotion. But he knew she was hurting. He saw it in her eyes. Her eyes held all of her emotion. He found her afterwards, crying by the lake. James had comforted her, giving her a hug. Lily had not pulled away, but hugged him back, crying into his shoulder. He could still feel her hug.
I can still feel you, just as close as skin, every now and then. All by myself, in a crowded room, or on my empty bed. There's a place you've touched, with your love, no one gets close to. I can still feel you.
Lily walked and walked, not really paying attention to where her feet were taking her. She thought back to when he had comforted her after her old best friend, Severus Snape, had called her a mudblood. He had found her crying down by the lake and had told her what a git Snape was, while giving her a hug, allowing her to soak his robes with her tears. She had said to him "Thank you James. But this does not mean I'll go out with you." He had smiled at her saying "That's okay, I'll never give up. I'll always love you." Then he had gotten up and walked away. 'What happened to that?' she thought. 'He said he'd always love me.'
James walked out towards the lake. He thought back to when he had told Lily he would always love her. He was keeping that promise so far, no matter how much it was hurting him. He wanted nothing more than to get over her, to be able to sleep at night without seeing her face, to pass her in the hallways without a second thought
You said you'd love me forever, then you said it's over. And, left me without the missing link.
Lily realized where she was walking; she was walking to her favorite spot by the lake. She had convinced herself weeks ago that she would not let James's absence bother her. She told herself that she wouldn't think about him anymore. She felt that she was doing fairly well. She only thought of him in class, in the hallways, when she ate, when she did homework, and when she dreamed. 'Okay,' she thought, 'Maybe I could do with thinking about him a little bit less. At least I don't think about him when I sit by the lake.' Lily's friends had noticed her decreased concentration, but did not mention it. They figured it was due to her recent breakup with her boyfriend. They had only been going out two weeks when Lily broke it off. He just wasn't James.
James drew closer to the lake, trying to keep his thoughts away from Lily. He was doing better these days. He didn't think about her when he sat by the lake. Class, however, was a different story. He couldn't concentrate, seeing as she was in all of his classes. He couldn't help awing at her skills, watching the way her red hair sat perfectly, the way her eyes sparkled. But, her eyes didn't sparkle much anymore, he'd noticed that. James didn't even stop to realize that he saw her eyes because she was looking back at him. He had tried going out with a few girls, but nothing had worked. She still consumed his thoughts.
I thought I'd forget you, but I guess I forgot to and lately I've been too confused to think. When I reach for someone new, it's like I'm touching you.
She wanted to feel his arms around her, his lips on hers.
He wanted to feel her body pressed up against his, her heart beating against his chest, her silky hair.
I can still feel you, just as close as skin every now and then. All by myself, in a crowded room or on my empty bed. There's a place you've touched, with your love, no one gets close to. I can still feel you.
Lily was still heading towards the lake. She stopped to look at the Whomping Willow, thinking back to the night when she had found out that James was an animagus. She had almost turned him in, until she found out his reasons. James was helping a friend. Remus Lupin was a werewolf and James's turning into a stag helped him through his difficult night every full moon. 'His touch…'
James looked over at the quidditch pitch. He had spent countless games, desperately trying to impress Lily Evans with his skills. He wanted nothing more than for her to be proud of him for excelling in something that he was good at. 'Her touch…'
In everything that moves. In everything I do. I can still feel you just as close as skin every now and then. All by myself, in crowded room or on my empty bed. There's a place you've touched, with your love, no one gets close to. I can still feel you.
Lily thought she saw the figure of James Potter sitting at her favorite spot by the lake. 'I'm imagining it' she thought. 'I'm wishing it.'
James looked around. He could swear, even at this distance, that he could see Lily vibrant red hair and emerald green eyes. 'Stop it James,' he mentally shook himself.
I can still feel you
As Lily drew closer, she realized that someone was indeed sitting in her favorite spot. "James?" she asked hesitantly.
James whipped around "Lily." He breathed.
I can still feel you
"What are you doing here?" she asked, hesitantly.
"Sitting in my favorite spot by the lake." He replied.
I can still feel you
Without thinking she ran to him and threw her arms around him. She began crying into his shoulder, apologizing. "This scene looks slightly familiar." James whispered. She looked up and her breath caught. This was the exact place James had comforted her at, two years previously, after Snape had hurt her.
I can still feel you
Their favorite spot on the lake…
I can still feel you
Lily looked up into his beautiful hazel eyes. "I love you James Potter." She whispered.
"No Lily Evans, I love you."
I can still feel you
[A/N click that review button dearies! Tell me exactly what you think.. please just don't be rude. This is my first songfic. ☺
