Yondaime

Prologue: Like you've never seen him before...

AN: NO VOTES. OR ELSE.

I I I

The roaring in the distance pierced eardrums for miles, sending the civilians into a panic. The red glare on the horizon was not the sunset but a far more horrible sight. The ground trembled, the earth heaved, the people screamed. The Kyuubi had come to the Leaf.

A blond-haired man with a headband of the Leaf stood over a hospital bed. His companion, of a paler complexion, put an arm over his shoulder. "I only wish it could be different, Arashi. There was nothing anyone could do. At least... at least your child is safe."

Arashi shook his head, the tears threatening to fall from his eyes. "He won't be safe. He... he and I have one thing we have to do together, and then he'll probably never be safe again."

The pale man's eyes widened. "You mean... you're going to use him for the jutsu?"

"Do I have any other choice? Can I ask anyone else to give up their child? Even if... there will be no family to take care of him, I can't force someone else to go through this suffering instead of me."

"You were always the idealist. You know, you could let me perform the technique... And leave you to care for your child."

Arashi smiled. "No. I could never... I could never leave the Leaf without their Hokage. Just promise me... nothing in the Leaf will harm him. Don't tell them what he is... and don't use him..." With that, he was gone, his infant child in his arms, to fight one last fight for his beloved nation.

"Kukukukuku..." Orochimaru, the fourth hokage laughed. "I was worried he would accept my offer... But I guess I can honor this one deal in exchange for his life... Kukukukuku..."

I I I

Naruto sat at a desk, his head down. For a bleary-eyed second, he lifted his head to look around the room, but, seeing only Sakura and Sasuke just as bored as he was, he put his head down again. It had been one half-hour since Iruka had left the building, one hour since the teams had been chosen, and forty-five minutes since the last of the other students had left with their jounin-sensei.

Naruto grinned when he remembered setting up a chalkboard eraser to fall on the head of the next person to enter the room. At least his lazy sensei would be punished for his crime.

Thinking about crime led him to thinking about the previous night, where he had fought a chuunin of the leaf... who had tricked him, who had used him... Naruto's faith in any authority other than his idol's was shaken, but nothing could take away his near-worship level of trust in the Yondaime Hokage, the man who had treated Naruto like his own son, who had arranged for him to learn his own style when Naruto didn't have a family style of his own to learn.

Naruto wasn't that good at it, but it was the thought that counted!

He didn't regret killing Mizuki one iota.

Naruto was shaken from his reverie when the door slid open, and a soft 'paff' of chalkboard eraser hitting hair was heard, followed immediately by an all-to-familiar growl.

"Brat..." Anko snarled from the doorway, "Do you wanna die?"

Naruto screamed. "You! Sadistic bitch!"

Anko ran up to him. "Yeah, well if I'm a sadistic bitch, then you're a good-for-nothing idiot! How'd you even graduate?"

Naruto responded without thinking. "I killed Mizuki! The traitor! Err... oops?" This last part was said when he realized the way in which his teammates were looking at him.

Anko smacked him over the head. "Well, no more of your stupid shit, boy! I'm not your tutor anymore, so I won't take even a little bit of your crap. I'm your jounin-sensei and if you don't do what I say you're gonna die! Haha!"

Sakura and Sasuke looked on, dumbfounded. "Naruto speaks like that... to Anko-sama?" Sakura squeaked out. Sasuke nodded absently, a horrified look on his face.

"If he angers Konoha's Number One Most Homicidal Ninja so much... we don't have a chance to survive." Sasuke agreed, for once talking to Sakura. Later, he would blame it on the shock of the situation.

I I I

"Alright losers! We're gonna be a team, so listen up! You've gotta tell me your name and something about you to get to know each other!" Anko shouted gleefully.

Sakura gulped. "Now that I think about it... she's just like Naruto..." she thought to herself.

Naruto scowled. "You first, Anko-sensei!"

Anko smiled deviously. "Sure, why not? I'm Mitarashi Anko, first student of the Hokage and Konoha's Number One Homicidal Ninja! I specialize in assassination, but I requested this teaching job so I could kil... err, teach some more to my own favorite student Naruto! My dreams for the future involve lots of death and probably some sex too! I have no fears! Pink hair, you next!"

Sakura almost didn't catch the last phrase, but shook her head to clear it and spoke. "I'm Haruno Sakura, and I... um..." she glanced at Sasuke. "I want to become a strong Kunoichi like Anko-sama! And I want to..." she glanced at Sasuke and giggled. "And I hate..." she glanced at Naruto and scowled. "My dreams for the future..." she glanced at Sasuke and sighed.

Anko growled. "You know, you stupid little girl, that you didn't ACTUALLY SAY ANYTHING?" Naruto, expecting her next move, managed to hold her arm back with both hands to prevent her from plunging a Kunai into Sakura's skull.

"Sensei, she shouldn't die for something so small... besides, I need my full team..." Naruto gasped out, the effort taking most of what he had.

"Fine..." Anko sighed, and sat back down. "Since I already know Naruto, Sasuke can go next."

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I like very little and I hate a lot of things. My dream is to restore my clan and to kill a certain man." He said, very seriously.

"Ooh, killing. I like that idea." Anko licked her lips. "Naruto, you go next."

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto, and I like ramen and learning new techniques! I hate people who aren't serious about their goals and I will one day be Hokage!" Naruto yelled.

Anko whacked him over the head once more. "Too loud, you idiot!"

Naruto grinned anyway.

I I I

Well, anyways, that's what I thought.

ETC.