A/N: A ficlet exchange with LuteLyre. This was hard to write and I'm not sure it's any good, but I hope you like it!
Gold and Dark
He dreamed of gold eyes and darkness. The nightmares woke him and no one was there for comfort. Figures with masks hovered outside the room, their silhouettes lingering. Masks and anonymity were his family; he knew the ANBU only by their facades.
He knew he was important, but he discovered why when he was six. The wood that shot out of his hands when he was emotional was special. He wasn't stupid; he heard the whispers of it being unnatural and the name Orochimaru, but he didn't know what it meant.
He discovered the importance of the name later and his hand shook while holding the scroll, his throat clenched. This man had given him his ability, so in a way, Orochimaru was almost his father. Almost.
The only role models he had were the faceless figures who appeared in his room and told him what to do. He obeyed and hoped that they'd give him some kindness and love so he knew he wasn't alone.
He graduated from the Academy when he was six. Everyone praised his wood ability. Since they praised it, he focused on developing it more and more.
That was the problem. He tried and tried, but was never as good as the Hokage who had the ability before him. There was a moment when he realized he would never have the same level of power as his predecessor. He did his best although he knew he was not enough.
A staggeringly huge fox appeared in Konoha and it was the most frightening thing he had ever seen. What could he do to something against something as powerful as that?
Devastation – splintering house beams, window glass shattering to pieces and crunching beneath his feet. A shard of it stuck in his foot through his shoe and he bent down to yank it out beofe he continued to run. A trail of blood followed in his wake.
Somehow, he survived. The Nine-Tails attack spurred him to train in repressing chakra just in case it happened again - worse case scenario.
He tried even harder when he discovered the Nine-Tails had been sealed into a boy.
He joined ANBU and started to learn about the people behind the masks. Half of them were new, different than from what he remembered when he was younger, but he was not sure. In ANBU, his wood jutsu was unique and he used it with caution. Everything he did was done after thought, consideration, and planning.
Failing was not an option. His village would not love him if he failed and he had nothing else that mattered.
He only met the gold eyes amidst darkness. Someone watched over him, always (he could never escape) and a feeling at the back of his mind kept him cautious just in case. He knew the gold eyes would bring about his death.
But his death had to be meaningful. Fight for the village until his very last breath and the village would honor and love him. So that was what he'd do.
Yet, he knew it would not take very long before he became invisible again after his death. He was merely a cog in the machine, a spoke in the wheel that was Konoha, and he had to be content with that.
He continued to fight for the brief moment of his usefulness and recognition. Maybe there would be more for him one day. Maybe not.