Learning to Breathe
The window was open, the summer breeze drifting into the dark room. The only occupant of the lonely setting was asleep on the luxurious bed. Tossing and turning, the person's tortured sleep showed signs of a bigger secret than the untimely death of her parents that led her to be a guest in the imposing citadel.
Suddenly, the air still in the room and the fireplace suddenly burnt with a dancing fire.
Minutes later the blankets slid off the person and she started quaking in her bed with a renewed fervor. Finally, her sleep broke and she raced from the clutches of the nightmare as she sat up, screaming.
After calming herself with unfortunate experience, the lady looked around the room.
No substantial harm to the room this time. No guards came running to her help. Her disturbed sleep was old news to the residents of the castle. Gossiped about, pitied and forgotten. Her previous help tired of her need of support to deal with her nightmares. Even they didn't express it openly, she knew and being a burden was the last thing she wanted. After all, she couldn't overstay her welcome in Camelot.
Shifting her pillows to lean her back against the head board completely, Morgana sighed as she settled back to wait out the night.
The next morning got her no respite. Her head and heart throbbing, she glided through the castle with glassy eyes. She knew she much have looked like frightening. With her hair loose, the bags under her eyes looking like bruises on her pale skin and her clothes hanging onto her thinning body, she knew she looked like a banshee from her childhood's story books. She drifted through the crowded corridors, absentmindedly noting the lack of Gwen and Merlin. The supposedly secret affair between Arthur and Gwen had not gone unnoticed by her.
After what seemed like an eternity, she reached her destination. The watching tower in the west wing was all but abandoned. The wing was deserted and the stairs leading to the tower head winding. All in all, it gave Morgana the privacy she needed and the fresh air her bedroom deprived her off. She looked down onto the ground far below her. A small accident and death would have her in a very strong grip in deed. She carefully stepped onto the parapet, ever the lady, holding her skirts gracefully.
One step, and no more visions.
One step and no more fear.
No more grief.
No more frightening possibilities.
No more…
there was so much that one step promised Morgana.
So much she craved .
So much she deserved .
So much she was denied.
And one step she did take.
As she did her back brushed against the hard wall of the tower. No matter how much Morgana wanted respite from her torturous imprisonment, she knew she couldn't die like a coward by taking her own life. No matter how much she just wanted it all to stop and just let her be.
She had to fight this. And if the gods willed that she did it alone, she would.
It was too easy otherwise.
Tired, with weight of the world on her shoulders, she walked back to her chambers to be welcomed by the memories of horrific events yet to come.
AN: So what do you think? Leave a review please :D
And this story has quite the twist coming up but it will take a long time before I can update again so put me in ur alert list J Thanks for the feedback