Mihail Keehl stood in front of the door of the apartment that supposedly belonged to Matt Jeevas. He couldn't believe he had actually been able to track him down but here he was. He hoped it was the right Matt. Mello really missed him. Taking a breath the leather clad blonde knocked on the door.

No answer

"H-hello...?"

He herd foot steps and the door opened. At first Mello wasn't sure that it was the right Mail because he hair was dyed red but he didn't know anyone else who would wear large orange googles over his eyes like Matt had always done.

"Uhh...hi...Matt?" said Mello, looking Down at the dirty green hallway carpeting below him.

Matt had looked surprised but now he only seemed a little bit confused as he tilted Mello's chin up forcing they're eyes to meet.

"Mello...it's you...your wearing leather now and you've got that scar...but I'd know those ice blue eyes anywhere...and not many males I meet have that kind of hair! Why don't you come inside?

Matt's words were friendly but they had a sharp cold edge to them.

Mello walked inside slowly as Matt sat down on a brownish leather couch and motioned for Mello to sit beside him.

"I'm glad I found you...!" sat The blonde. He felt kinda happy...kinda squeamish...

"Really blondie?" Matt raised an eyebrow. His hands were up behind his head in a reclining way, and he had both his feet on the seat of the couch.

Blondie? WTF?

"Well...of corse! The last time I saw you-"

Matt cut him off. "Ha. Yeah right. The last time you saw me we were at whammy's and I was asleep...peacefully unaware of what you were doing and where you were going. Matt smirked and Mello's stomach twisted into a knot.

"I know...I ran away..." He couldn't finish.

"And now your back?"

"..."

"For what Mello? Why did you come back?"

"Because..." Mello fiddled with his rosary. Matt noticed this.

The redhead got to his knees and crawled across the couch to Mello, and pried the crucifix from his gloved fingers. Mello noticed Matt was wearing leather gloves too.

"I remember this..." a cruel smile played at the gamers lips. "You would finger it whenever you were nervous...like the time at Whammy's...it was night and was playing with my DS on my bed and you came over. I paused my game, and saw you had your cross in your hands, twisting the cord around..." Matt began twisting it. "And then you said 'Matt...I need to tell you something' and I asked what and you said "I love you and if you don't like me back please don't hate me" I think those were your exact words. I had looked at you and you blushed ever so cutely, and then I ran up and hugged you an I told you I loved you too... I fell for your lies for SEVEN WEEKS AFTER THAT AND THEN YOU LEFT ME!"

Matt jerked his goggles up onto his head so Mello could see his emerald eyes burning with green fires of fury. He dropped Mello's rosary and let it fall back onto his chest, grabbing his shoulders with vice-like grip and getting so close in his face that they're foreheads were almost touching. Mello bit his lip to keep himself from kissing Matt.

"Matt I never lied...I promise I do love you!" He looked up with a pleading expression Matt refused to fall for.

"I HATE YOU!" He gripped Mello's shoulders. "You are a heartless daemon inside of the sexy body of a blonde boy with beautiful eyes that is smart enough to be the second successor of the greatest detective in the world, that WAS MY BEST FRIEND SCINCE I WAS LIKE FIVE!" Matt slid the orange ovals of plastic back over his eyes and leaned back on the arm of the sofa, signifying that his outburst was over.

Who knew that you could hurt somebody more by saying nice things as opposed to cursing and calling them a Baka?

"I am never going to fall for someone like you again." The redhead said mellowly,but firmly reaching onto the side-table next to the couch and picking up a lighter an a pack of cigarettes that Mello had failed to notice earlier, and lit one. He closed his eyes and inhaled. Then he opened them and holding the cigarette with two fingers, as smoke wafted up towards the ceiling, and said: " Yes I smoke now, blondie and it's your fault. I picked up this stupid habit shortly after I got out of Whammy's, because at the time, I still missed my Mello.

The blonde boy was looking down at his lap, his long bangs covering his eyes like a curtain. His his hands grabbed onto each of his opposite arms like he was cold.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, feeling heavy, unshed tears in his eyes.

"You're not." Said Matt folding his arms across his chest and rolling his eyes behind his goggles. "I might have accepted that apology several years ago when I still cried about you at night, but now? Forget it. He took a drag of the cigarette and breathed out smoke. I don't love you. And I never will."

Mello inhaled sharply and felt burning teardrops trickle down his face, his heart so heavy with regret it felt like someone had taken the bullets from his gun and sewn them into his chest.

'I hate myself' he thought.

Matt looked at him and said "I think you've worn out your welcome here, you why don't fuck of and find someone else's heart to brea...wait...are you... crying?

"I-I know you have good reasons to hate me..."

"Hell yah I do!"

"...but your the only person I have left...I've got nobody else in the fucking pointless world!"

"No I'm not, because you don't have me anymore."

"No please...I can't bear to lose you..."

"Mihail" said Matt shaking his head. "You have ALREADY lost me."

Mello jerked up to his full height and for a second and a half the two boys just stared at each other. The blonde one wanted to get the hell away from the redhead, and never see him again but also never leave him again. 'Oh shit...Matt hates me...what the hell?' Mello mentally whimpered, then spun around and bolted out the door.

Flying down the hallway Mello's thoughts raced 'I am such a stupid Baka fuck'n asshole idiotic bastard Matt hates I can't beat Near that frick'n albino sheep boy this is all his fault if he didn't exist I wouldn't have fucking ran off and I wouldn't have left Matt oh shuddup Mello you know it's your fault it's all your fault your obsessive need to be the best you forgetting about love and thinking about winning you may have lost to that Near bastard but you wouldn't have lost Matt now you've lost everything your life is so-' Mello stopped suddenly and noticed that he had reached a bridge with a road and a sidewalk in the side overlooking a lake. Mello walked over to the railing and felt the chilly wind blow his long hair. He looked out a the blue sky, and felt calm but sorrowful. Tears were constantly rolling down his cheeks and being lost into the the deep lake, as if all the bits if happieness he had ever felt were dripping away.

"My life is pointless" Mihail whispered to himself. 'maybe I should just die right now. Hey, I could do that... I have a gun and I could just jump off this bridge...I think I'll do both.' The former mafia dude took out his gun and pointed it at his chest.

"It can't hurt to break my heart one last time...because there's almost none of it left anyways..."

It was three o' clock in the morning and Matt was asleep. Well he had been at least. He had woken up and felt like somthing was missing...'could Mello really have been sorry?...probably not..." he thought and then fell asleep again.

The next afternoon Matt was staring out the window of his apartment the uslesless end of his cigarette held loosely in his fingers. He felt as though somone was watching him and was wondering how the hell Mello's rosary had randomly appeared on the floor of his kitchen...