Something I made because I was bored!
in case you can't tell
Draco is bold writing
In the Potions classroom….
Snape was at it again. He wanted complete hell, as usual. So, why not mix things up a bit and throw Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy together as potions partners? We can already see trouble stirring…
Hey Granger.
Malfoy, why are you talking to me?
I'm bored
Then pay attention
And you think that would make me unbored?
That's not a word
What isn't a word?
What you just said
Say it
No
Why not?
Why should I?
Why should you not?
Ughhhh go away Malfoy. I'm mentally frowning at you right now.
The more she glares the more she cares
Shut up, you are sooooo cocky. Just go away
Okay
Where are you going? You can't walk out in the middle of a class!
You just told me to
I did not
Uhhh yes you did
No I….why are you so literal?
I'm not. You're just no fun
I'm plenty fun
Noooo
Yes I am!
Prove it
Okay um…
Ha I told you
How do I prove it?
I dunno you're the one proving it, not me.
But I can't think of a way to prove it
Not my problem
Ughh go back to paying attention to Snape. I'm sure what he is saying is important
Ha that's a joke
What is?
What Snape says is never important
Well whether or not he has mercy on us if we get caught passing notes in class is
Now that's important
5 mintues later...
What are we learning, anyways?
Sod off Malfoy and listen
This crap doesn't make any sense. What are we listening to?
Shut up
You're avoiding the question
No I'm not
You sooo are
I'm not
Then what are we learning?
Er…..I don't know
HA! See? I win!
This isn't a game, Malfoy
Life's a beach and I'm just playing in the sand
What the heck?
Ugh, nevermind
Fine
Fine
Another five mintues later...
Grannnngeerrrr I'm still bored
Sod off Malfoy
Why
Because
Because why
Just because
Ughh you really are no fun. Do you know that?
Yes you said that… 3 times already. 4 now
Did you really just go up to the top of the page to count how many time I said that?
Yes
Wow….you know we could do something to make this class fun.
Ha now that's a joke. When is Snape's class ever fun?
I didn't say it was fun, I said we could make it fun
How so
I could kiss you
What? Ewww
That's not what you said last night
Why on earth would I kiss you
You would enjoy it
I wouldn't
You would
No I wouldn't.
But that's not what happened last night
I don't want to kiss your soft lips Malfoy
….Who ever said my lips were soft?
….
Oh my merlin, you take advantage of me in my sleep!
What? No!
That's bloody illegal and disgusting Granger!
Ughh I'll just stop talking now
Good, less talking more snogging
Nooo
Why not
Because
Because why
Because….in front of everyone?
Yes
Why?
Because
Ughh don't imitate me
Whoever said I was imitating you?
Me
Oh yeah…well, I'm going to kiss you
No you're not
You don't control me
Oh but I can
Now that is what you said last night
Ughhhhhh
It was more of a moan
Oh Merlin!
Did you know your eyes look amazing?
Uhh….
I know I'm charming
Seeing your back would be pretty charming
I like them feisty
You like them no matter what
Ewww, not true
So true and you know it
Jealous are we?
NO!
Always quick are the guilty. And besides, it wasn't really a question. More of a statement
If it wasn't a question then why'd you put a question mark on the end of it?
I dunno.
Well then…I'm not jealous. You would do anything to get a girl in bed.
Ahhh, not just any girl, preferably you
Ew
Hey! I know how to please a woman!
Good! Then please get away from me
I would go to the end of the world for you
But would you stay there?
Always
Awww that's adorable. Does everyone know you're going soft?
I'm not going soft!
Then stop with the cheesy pick-up lines
Well, what do you say? Meet me in the broom closet after dinner?
It depends. I don't want to see you kissing a broom.
I take that as a no then :(
No shit Sherlock!
Well, it's elementary my dear Watson
You make it look difficult, Malfoy. Now stop talking, Snape's turning his greasy head towards us
I'm not talking, I'm writing
Again, stop being so literal!
Okay. I'm gonna do it
Do what?
Kiss you.
No you're not.
I will.
No.
I'm going to do it in 5…..
No you're not
4….
Wait
3….
Oh merlin you're serious aren't you?
2…..
Snape, he's stalking over!
1…
…Snape!
"Passing notes in class, Miss Granger and Mister Malfoy?" Snapes cold voice cut through the air. Everyone turned to look at the duo. "I must say, I expected more from you," Hermione bowed her head in shame, while Draco nearly raised an eyebrow. Snape reached out a spidery hand.
"Give them here," he snapped, clicking his fingers, once, twice. Hermione was about to reach up to hand over their conversation, but Draco shoved his actual Potions notes in Snape's face instead. Snape gave them one glance and threw them back on the desk.
"The one's you were passing, Mister Malfoy,"
Draco scowled and Hermione reluctantly handed over the note sheet. Snape quickly swept his black cape like a bat to the front of the room and stood before the class.
"Good news for the two of you. You won't be getting a detention," Snape smirked. Draco and Hermione exchanged looks of surprise, which turned to horror and the Potions professor continued his sentence. "How about we read these aloud, shall we?" his smirk was now as wide as London Bridge.
"No!" Hermione and Draco cried just and the class cheered in encouragement.
"Oh help me," Draco shrunk in his seat.
"Prepare for public humiliation in 3, 2, 1, blast off!" Hermione said sarcastically. Sneering at the two horrified students, Snape began to read.
"Hey Granger. Malfoy, why are you talking to me?"
"Why is he talking to her?" someone asked.
"I'm bored,"
"I don't blame him," Harry muttered, earning a death glare from Snape. Harry gulped nervously.
"Then pay attention"
"Oh for Pete's sake Granger, don't you ever stop obeying the rules?" a Ravenclaw girl sighed.
"Who's Pete?" someone asked.
"Oh never mind," the girl face palmed.
"And you think that would make me unbored? That's not a word,"
"She's right, it isn't!" Dean Thomas said smartly.
"Yes it is," Blaise Zabini from Slytherin argued back.
"What isn't a word? What you just said Say it No Why not? Why should I? Why should you not?"
"You can practically see the sexual tension!" someone shouted. The class cheered in agreement, and Hermione shrunk in her chair.
"Hermione and Malfoy don't have any sexual tension!" Ron screamed, his face red.
"Someone's jealous,"
"I am not!"
The class decided to leave Ron alone.
"Ughhhh go away Malfoy. I'm mentally frowning at you right now. The more she glares the more she cares Shut up, you are sooooo cocky,"
"Fiesty, Granger," Zabini winked.
"Shhh! Get back to reading!" someone said, and Snape cleared his throat and carried on.
"Ew. Just go away Okay Where are you going? You can't walk out in the middle of a class! You just told me to,"
"They are sooo cute together!" a Hufflepuff cooed.
"NO THEY ARE NOT!" an angry Ron shouted.
"I did not Uhhh yes you did No I….why are you so literal? I'm not. You're just no fun I'm plenty fun Noooo,"
"Hermione isn't any fun, he's right," Lavender Brown stated. Hermione growled.
"Yes I am! Prove it Okay um…Ha I told you How do I prove it? I dunno you're the one proving it, not me. But I can't think of a way to prove it Not my problem Ughh go back to paying attention to Snape. I'm sure what he is saying is important Ha that's a joke"
Snape looked up at this, frowning at Draco who gave him a nervous wave.
"What is? What Snape says is never important,"
"HE'S RIGHT! SNAPE, YOU OLD BAT!" many voices chorused.
"Well whether or not he has mercy on us if we get caught passing notes in class is Now that's important,"
Many people paled at the thought of an angry Snape.
"What are we learning, anyways?"
"That's actually a valid point, Malfoy," Harry said thoughtfully.
"Sod off Malfoy and listen This crap doesn't make any sense. What are we listening to? Shut up You're avoiding the question No I'm not You sooo are I'm not Then what are we learning? Er…..I don't know HA! See? I win! This isn't a game, Malfoy Life's a beach and I'm just playing in the sand What the heck? Ugh, nevermind Fine Fine."
"I can't get over how romantic this is," a hufflepuff crooned, and Snape nodded in agreement.
"Grannnngeerrrr I'm still bored Sod off Malfoy Why Because Because why Just because Ughh you really are no fun. Do you know that? Yes you said that… 3 times already. 4 now Did you really just go up to the top of the page to count how many time I said that?"
"Wow Granger," a slytherin laughed and Hermione glared.
"Yes Wow….you know we could do something to make this class fun. Ha now that's a joke. When is Snape's class ever fun? I didn't say it was fun, I said we could make it fun How so I could kiss you,"
"BLOODY HELL!"
"DON'T DO IT HERMIONE!"
"SHHHH!"
"What? Ewww O_o That's not what you said last night Why on earth would I kiss you You would enjoy it I wouldn't You would No I wouldn't."
"Why is Malfoy so determined that she will like it?"
"But that's not what happened last night,"
"Okay, what the hell happened last night?"
"Hey Harry, now that I think of it I don't recall seeing Hermione in the common room for a while…"
"I don't want to kiss your soft lips Malfoy ….Who ever said my lips were soft?…."
"!"
"WHAT THE HELL HERMIONE?"
Oh my merlin, you take advantage of me in my sleep!
What? No!
That's bloody illegal and disgusting Granger!
Ughh I'll just stop talking now
Good, less talking more snogging,"
"The tension begins to build, as they lean in and-"
"Don't you dare start narrating this,"
"SHHH!"
"Nooo Why not Because Because why Because….in front of everyone? Yes Why?Because Ughh don't imitate me Whoever said I was imitating you? Me Oh yeah…well, I'm going to kiss you. No you're not You don't control me Oh but I can Now that is what you said last night,"
"Okay, what serious fucking went on last night?"
"Forbidden love!" Harry swooned.
"Ughhhhhh It was more of a moan Oh Merlin! Did you know your eyes look amazing? Uhh….I know I'm charming Seeing your back would be pretty charming I like them feisty You like them no matter what Ewww, not true So true and you know it,"
"Do I smell jealousy?"
"HOLY COW!"
"Holy cow? No one says that anymore!"
"Keep reading, I wanna know what happens!"
"It's heating up in here!"
Snape greedily gripped the page, his beady eyes scanning it hungrily.
"Jealous are we? NO! Always quick are the guilty. And besides, it wasn't really a question. More of a statement,"
"I can practically feel the sexual tension,"
"No shit Sherlock!"
"Shhh! This is getting good!"
"If it wasn't a question then why'd you put a question mark on the end of it?"
Snape looked up. "And Draco's the literal one?" He sighed before returning to reading.
"I dunno. Well then…I'm not jealous. You would do anything to get a girl in bed. Ahhh, not just any girl, preferably you,"
"WOAH!"
"OH MERLIN! WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?"
"Ew Hey! I know how to please a woman! Good! Then please get away from me,"
"You go girl!"
"This is better than the glee episode that aired last night!"
"Keep reading!"
"WAIT! I have to tweet this!"
"I would go to the end of the world for you But would you stay there? Always,"
"AWWWWWW!" everyone, save Ron yet including Snape cried.
"They need a couple name!"
"How about Dramione?"
"No, that sucks!"
"It's perfect! They're perfect!
"I sense an FB moment!
"Awww that's adorable. Does everyone know you're going soft? I'm not going soft! Then stop with the cheesy pick-up lines,"
"I think they are a nice touch…"
"Hermione! Don't be fooled by his charm! Come back here and stay safe! There's a free seat next to me baby!" a boy from Hufflepuff shouted, shoving his friend next to him out of his seat.
"OW! I HIT MY FUNNY BONE!"
"We should have popcorn!"
"Agreed,"
"Wait, I have some! I carry it around in my bag all the time!"
"…Dude, who does that?"
"ME obviously!"
"…."
"Popcorn for all!"
"On with the story!"
"Well, what do you say? Meet me in the broom closet after dinner? It depends. I don't want to see you kissing a broom,"
"YAY HERMIONE!"
"I take that as a no then :( No shit Sherlock!"
"HEY, YOU STOLE MY LINE!"
"Well, it's elementary my dear Watson You make it look difficult, Malfoy. Now stop talking, Snape's turning his greasy" Snape mumbled something about using shampoo "head towards us I'm not talking, I'm writing,"
"BURN SIZZLE!"
"Again, stop being so literal! Okay. I'm gonna do it Do what? Kiss you,"
"She's gonna kiss him back!
A total of five kids fainted.
"SHHHH LETS GET BACK TO THE STORY! I CAN'T STAND THE SUSPENSE ANY LONGER!" Snape stomped his foot like a child.
"No you're not. I will. No. I'm going to do it in 5…..No you're not 4….
"THE SUSPENSE! ITS AGONIZING!"
"Wait 3…."
"HE'S REALLY GOING TO KISS HER!"
"Oh merlin you're serious aren't you? 2….. Snape, he's stalking over!"
Snape looked up sharply from his reading. "I don't stalk,"
"Read!" many people were on the brink of pulling out their hair.
"1…"
"TELL ME WHEN IT'S OVER!" Pansy Parkinson shrieked.
"…Snape!"
There was a pause in the classroom before everyone exploded.
"SNAPE! YOU FAT OLD MAN!
"YOU BAT YOU RUINED IT!"
"HOW DARE YOU!"
"I'M GOING TO BITE OFF EACH INDIVIDUAL TOE!"
"There is always next class!" Snape raced out of the room before he could be murdered by any of his students. The rest of the class chased out after him, leaving Draco and Hermione alone at their desk. Draco turned to Hermione.
"So about that kiss…"