She had wanted so badly to go with him to Seheron. She imagined the lush jungles, the smells of tea and incense in the air. It had only been a suggestion, a passing comment on the way to fight the Archdemon.
But she had understood. As Sten looked at her quickly, his eyes cast down. She had left him to defend the armies. She told him it was because he was the fiercest of them.
But truly it was because she did not want him there when she fought the dragon. In case Morrigan's promise didn't work.
She knew Sten would survive; he could survive anything. And while she would have wanted him there in her final moments, she couldn't do that too him. And part of her was afraid…afraid that in those moments he wouldn't feel the same way she did. She could not stand to think she might die in his arms, knowing he didn't love her.
But that night…they had lived.
Alistair went off to make his speeches and smile prettily for the crowds.
And she found herself alone.
He had left her, but she knew it would happen. Why would a king ever marry an elf from the alienage? He had gone through the ritual, perhaps a token of his feelings for her, but she half suspected he was too afraid to die.
So as the festivities continued, her party had celebrated through the streets of Denerim, drinking and dancing, singing all the way through the battlefield. She made her way back to her party, a makeshift campsite in the heart of the market district.
Through all the drinking people, through all those in the streets, there in the dark, she could see him, standing tall amongst them.
He looked at her and he made his way through the crowd. They reached each other, a makeshift fire lighting each other's faces against the smoke filled night.
"Kadan…you are alive."
He showed no restraint after that and he could feel her submission underneath his fierce kiss. That had been for her benefit, the affection before the act, as he took her in the squalor, murmuring words she could not understand as he carried her into a tent, pushing her onto the ground.
The slit of the tent remained open, letting the firelight reveal their features in the darkness. She looked up at the one she loved, wanting so much to touch his face.
Her tunic was ripped and torn from the battle and he easily removed it from her, tearing the remaining seams. He flipped her on her stomach and she could hear the buckles of his pants, as they were undone.
He did not waste time arousing her, which did not bother her, feeling herself growing wetter just from pure excitement. He removed the last pieces of her clothing, his own still nearly covering all but his cock. She could hear his belt jingling as he entered her, concentrating the sound to ignore the pain.
He grabbed her breast with one hand as he pounded into her, the other gripping into the dirt by her hand. She cried out, overwhelmed by the relief of being alive and the consummation of her feelings.
The words she wanted to say did not come easily to her and she knew they would fall upon deaf ears. So she said nothing. She gave herself to the act as he thrust into her, her back arching into him, wanting to be completely filled by him. In response, he lent his body forth, biting down hard on her already bruised shoulder, grasping harder on her breast.
She could feel herself coming closer to the edge as she heard his breathing grow shallower and quicker, his movements faster, desperate, his hand fumbling as it tried to hold on to her completely.
She came as he kissed her bruised shoulder, moaning louder than she wished. She wanted him to come too, to feel him shudder beneath her. His breathing nearly stopped as he thrust deep into her, and she could feel his seed, hotter than any other she had been with.
Sten collapsed beside her, pulling her onto his chest, his eyes closing as he held her in his arms. She caught her breath and pulled a saddle blanket around them. She too was tired. But she was alive.
She woke, the Qunari having left her side. Her body ached slightly, but she did not know how much was from the sex and how much was from the battle.
There would be festivities that day, the coronation, and the pronouncement of the Hero of Ferelden. She only asked for the alienage to be given representation. Alistair would give her that, even if it were only out of guilt.
She spoke to each of her companions in turn, thanking them all, thankful each had made through the night safely. She missed Morrigan's presence, but she had lived up to her promise. She could not begrudge her that.
As she turned to leave, she saw Sten, dressed in the Qunari style, waiting for her by the door.
"Kadan," he bowed his head, "I leave soon for Seheron. The winds are good, they tell me, I should leave for the seas soon."
"I wish you a good journey," she said, smiling, longing to touch his face, "Be safe."
"You…you could come with me, if you wished," he said hesitantly.
"Will you ever return to Ferelden?" She asked, "Would I make the journey alone?"
"My duty is to the Qun," Sten replied, with almost softness to his voice, "I cannot abandon my duty…even for you."
"I am Warden-Commander now," she said looking at him intently, "I am the only Grey Warden in Ferelden…and the Alienage, we may be able to help my people…I can't leave, Sten."
"You too understand duty," he replied and he took her hand, a gesture of affection she was not used to from him.
She didn't say goodbye as she left. She regretted it, but she knew she couldn't.