Title: Making Dreams into Nightmares

Series: IDW

Pairing: Sunstreaker/Hot Rod

Rating: R to sorta NC-17

Spoilers: Spotlight Hot Rod

Warnings: There is lots of smutty content, angst and bitter sweetness. But this is the nicer part. Part two is the real killer.

Notes: This was originally to be a one-shot. It turned into three. Also, brackets [[ ]] stand for flashbacks. I didn't get a beta this time.. So ah… bear with me?

Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers. And this story line belongs to IDW. For all their angst, I borrowed it to feed my own silly desires.

Summary: Sunstreaker can't have what he wants most and Hot Rod is honest to a fault with terrible luck on his side. And sometimes, that's all it takes to bring two people together. In an attempt to overlook what is hurting them on the inside, they find they are getting more than they bargained for.

Part I: Dreams

"All my dreams turn into nightmares."

"You're so melodramatic." The handsome features twisted in mock disgust as tropic blue optics narrow to hide the flare of energy to them. Yellow fingers moved delicately down the curve of his neck sending a shiver down his spinal unit. "You're such a doomsayer. What happened to being thrilled about being made a unit leader?"

"C'mon, Sunny… you know how my luck goes…" Darkened sapphire bled through, mere slivers of light as he tipped his helm back. Silver fingertips grazed up the strong forearms before gripping the bolsters on Sunstreaker's shoulders.

"Mm… Keep talking like that, you'll get fragged you idiot." Lips curled into a smirk against the soft metal of his cheek before the soft rubbery tip of a glossa trailed along a cheek seam. "Shouldn't you be worrying about more important things right now, Roddy?"

The smaller figure laughed through a gasp, as his fingers tightened hard against the struts of his shoulders. "What? Ah…" Shuddering as dental plating found the edge of his jaw; the laughter didn't leave his voice. "Like you?"

"What else is there?" Sunstreaker grinned evilly into the contour of his neck. He could tell by the way his jaw moved and the sweep of those lips as they ran along the wires in his neck.

"Nn… Fraggin… narcissist." A soft chuckle left Roddy as he pushed his fingers into the seams of the warrior's back weaving through wires softly and gripping. Letting out a soft mewl as the other's dental plates rolled a fuel line between them, Hot Rod managed to tip his head further back against the berth offlining his optics completely.

"Naturally." Sunny's voice was a deep purr into his audio as strong hands worked their way down Hot Rod's sides. Dancing along the edges of his torso, Roddy felt his chassis tighten as he gasped and arched into those hands. "Limber aren't you?"

"Ha ha… Ahhh…" Lifting his hips into Sunny's hands, he panted as fans began to kick in. "You never… take… me seriously!"

All that answered him was a long purr. Bringing his optics online dimly, he tips his head down to look at his lover as Sunny sat back on his heels and slowly dragged his optics over his body. Turning his head away, lines in Roddy's face tightened as optic ridges knit together. Sunstreaker seemed to have other things in his processor though, as he pinched at his hip. "Look at me."

Shifting a fisted hand to his lips, Roddy bit into his index finger trying to ignore the way the elder was circling his fingertips so erotically against the armor of his thighs. He could feel the way they rolled under them then tightened their hold. With a sudden yank, his lower body was pulled onto Sunstreaker's lap forcing out a surprised cry from his lips.

Turning sharp optics, to glare at the warrior, he could only see a devious smirk painted over beautiful features. "I knew that would get your attention."

"You just can't stand it if I'm not focused on you." Roddy's lips drew up at the corners as he smiled softly. Though biting in content, it lacked all sting on delivery.

Sunstreaker cocked an optic ridge slowly then neatly drew a fingertip down a seam in Roddy's thigh. "Hot Rod. If I let you go off, you'd go into one of your not so secret bouts of self doubt. Which… I honestly don't know why…" A Cheshire cat grin swept over his face as he delved into the underside of the younger's knee to tweak the wiring. "I mean… look who is worshipping your body."

"This…" he arched slightly as the sensors sent a shock of electricity up his legs, "from the bot that only seduced me in the beginning…. Because he couldn't have what he wanted."

Yellow hands stilled a moment drawing Hot Rod's optics to gaze with concern at Sunny's façade. The cocky forthright smile was gone, and tension lines formed as he clenched his jaw. Caribbean blue optics dimmed and faded as they seemed to stare through Roddy's torso letting him know he'd said the wrong thing. "Hey… Sunstreaker…"

When no answer came, he rolled his body up, the pistons and struts hissing as he sat up into the larger mech's lap. Softly slipping his fingers over Sunny's shoulders, he leaned closer lightly kissing at the elder's helm. "Just count it off as bitter musings… I know I'm second string."

"Primus, you're annoying." Lifting his helm, Roddy watched as the sly smile returned to those lips. "You seriously have no slaggin' clue how gorgeous you are."

His optics flared as he lowered his head. "I…"

"Can it." Pressing strong hands against the plane of his chest, Roddy felt Sunny shove him onto his back again. Delicately the tips traced over the embossed flames before Sunstreaker leaned down to draw the smooth rubbery tip of his glossa along their wake.

"Yes master." Hot Rod bit back with a chuckle mixed with the sound of a purr.

"Oooh… I like that." Butterfly kisses followed, spilling over his chestplate and followed up by nips along the collar. Sunstreaker sighed in content as his hands worked their way under the warm artistic plane and through the wires to tweak sensor nodes that his fingers could get to. Hot Rod felt like his body lit on fire as sensors roared to life in a chain reaction to his touch.

"Sunstreaker…" Sighing the name out, his body writhed into the touches. Sunstreaker's hands felt like they were everywhere at once as they assaulted seams and slid under plating to tangle through wires. The loud hum of fans drowned out his thoughts and drove the doubts away as the heat rose in his internals.

Rolling his head to the side, Roddy once more bit into the corner of his knuckles as he felt one leg lifted gently in strong hands. The sweep of rubber into his knee joint caused him to gasp and lift his hips off of the strong thighs his aft had been pressing into. Fingertips trailed down the underside of his calf before pressing into the joint of his ankle. "Roddy… just stop thinking."

Shuddering hard, his leg twitched as the surprisingly nimble digits moved about to press into the crevice of the sole of his foot. The sensitive metal sent a shock of pleasure down his thigh that ran straight to his spark. "Ah!"

Sunstreaker hummed above him and Roddy's processor whirled fast as the intoxicating heat invaded it. Curling his other leg slowly about the other's waist, he heard the snort followed by the soft whisper against his inner thigh. "Better not scratch my paint."

"Mm… you know I'll fix it."

"Getting slaggin' good at it too." The press of lips against the softer metal of his thigh caused him to quiver as Sunny kissed up the limb slowly. Hot Rod jerked as the nasal ridge slid over the seam where thigh met codpiece. Turning his head, his optics flared to see Sunny's lips parted and his glossa slip out to trail along the piece of armor dipping down into the seam.

"SUNNY!" Joints stiffened and he threw his head back as the over sensitized sensors fired a wealth of feeling and data into his network. "Please! Stop teasing!"

Chuckling lowly, Sunstreaker shifted against his body and wrapped his hands about Hot Rod's waist. Dragging the younger mech up, the warrior allowed their noses to slide together. Roddy couldn't help the way he panted. The heat in his systems forced him to use his mouth as well as his vents while he stared into Sunny's face. The hot air slid over metal features leaving a sheen of condensation that caused the yellow mech to shudder. For a moment, Hot Rod wasn't sure if he was mad at that pleased look, or further turned on. Carefully he lifted his hands and drew his fingertips over Sunstreaker's face in a sense of awe. Leaning closer, soft pliable lips melded into one another as he kissed the elder slowly and deeply.

Sunstreaker's engine purred against his chest while he pushed his hands up Hot Rod's back. For a moment, they lingered at the gap just under Roddy's upper armor before pushing inside. Hot Rod couldn't stop the moan that the other hungrily swallowed through the kiss. Sunny saw the opportunity and took it to push his glossa into the younger's mouth and invaded the slick cavern, plotting out and memorizing every strut and curvature of the inside.

Groaning, Hot Rod felt all of his higher level thinking fading away as his systems drew closer and closer to overload. Sunstreaker had plenty of time to learn all of his weaknesses and pulled no punches in his fighting or in his interfacing. Gasping out as one hand found the seam of his interface panel; Sunny quickly recovered the kiss and drew Roddy's glossa into his own mouth.

"Mm…" As his lover suckled and nipped at his glossa, he barely even noticed the soft slide of the panel as it opened for Sunny's questing fingers. Only when one digit slid into his port did he rip his head back and arch against the yellow form. "SUNNY!"

The false connection had sent a shock through him, and now his internals were shaking. Sunstreaker purred, pleased at the reaction he'd gotten before removing his finger. Not long after, he felt his lover's cable snapping into his port and flooding his datastreams with all of Sunstreaker's coding. Writhing against the elder's form, his fingers once more gripped the yellow bolsters and cried out sharply.

When Sunstreaker finally plugged Roddy's cable into his own port, he couldn't even tell. Pressing hard into the broader form, he whimpered and pushed his face into Sunny's neck. Roddy could feel the sweep of hands up his back and when they drew over his spoiler, he lost all sense. The rush was hard and fast as fingertips grazed and pinched the edges of gold mixed in with the outpouring of desire and data through the interface connection.

Sunny's hands gripped his spoiler hard dragging Roddy roughly against him. "Overload, Roddy." His tone, strained and harsh, still held every ounce of command that he carried himself with day by day.

Too much. Throwing his head back as his systems obeyed, Hot Rod's body seemed to scream out as his overcharged spark felt like it was bursting from his chassis. "Sunstreaker!"

In one exploding moment he forgot everything. All of his worries, the self doubt, and fell into the intense warmth and strong hands as he heard the groan so close to his audio. It sent shivers down his spinal unit as he sank against Sunstreaker's body.

"Hot Rod…"

Giving a low purr, he could feel the ghosting sensation of gentle hands on his back as they lowered to the berth. But the heavy weight of needing recharge took over as it saturated his processor. At times he wondered why he kept going back to Sunny. But then when he felt this way, on the edge of consciousness and recharge, he remembered. And where Sunstreaker remained notorious for using and leaving before morning, Roddy only woke once without the heated form beside him.

-+-

[["So… heard you did a bang up job on that last run, Hot Rod." Springer smirked and shoved an energon cube over when he sat next to him. Grimly staring at the contents, he rolled his shoulders to get the soreness out of them.

"Yeah, laugh it up Mr. Perfect." Sighing, he finally wrapped his fingers around the cube. The small energon bar on the base held quite a few bots that were off duty. The low murmur of conversation was the only sound in the dimly lit room. This was a rare luxury, and none missed out on it.

"Don't be that way." The green triple changer chuckled beside him. "Sucks for you… since you can't even drink your sorrows away like everyone else."

"You just won't quit." The corners of his lips pulled up in a faint smile as he picked up the cube. His mood hadn't improved, but he never passed up banter with his best friend. Being as they rarely had the chance to talk.

"And you love it." Lifting his head, Hot Rod caught that slight grin of confidence. For all of his show, it amazed him that Springer lacked the conceit many accused him of having.

"If you say so." Leaning forward, he rested his elbows on the counter and gazed about the room. The botched up missions kept piling on him, and his commanders didn't hesitate to blame it on his compulsive nature. Too much action they said, without enough thought processing. Yeah… too bad he was immune to high grade.

His survey of the room suddenly stopped as his optics landed on the sleek shine of yellow highlighted in white light. Searching his processor, the name was on the edge of his vocalizer, but he couldn't put a finger on it. The yellow mech's form was hunched over the bar, one elbow on the surface with his palm cradling his cheek. Cheek seams and lips drew tightly over handsome features as his jaw visibly tensed.

Marveling at the perfect shine and gloss of yellow paint, he found the most over powering feature were his optics. Hot Rod stared at the dimmed hues of tropic blue and slowly felt himself pulled into the sea of frustration and something close to sadness. What was his name?

"Roddy? Hello?" Springer gave a grunt before he felt a sharp pang to his side as a large elbow joint jabbed into him.

"Sorry! Ow! For Primus' sake you big lug! I'm recovering!" Covering with a smirk, he met the amused optics of his friend.

"You'll live." Shifting his optics to the mech Roddy had been staring at, he shrugged his shoulder. "Give it up. Sunstreaker is the love em and leave em type. So, want a one night stand? Go for it. Otherwise forget it."

"Oh lay off. I was just curious. Like I'd fall for looks." Snorting, he shoved the leader of the Wrecker crew hard in the shoulder barely even moving him. No, he wasn't the type to be taken in by looks. But the looks weren't the reason he was staring.

"Yeah. S'why I warned you." Shaking his head, Springer rose to his feet. "I've got to turn in. We're heading out early." Pausing he looked at his friend carefully before patting his shoulder. "Take care of yourself, Hot Rod. And try to keep your processor cool, all right?"

"You know me."

"That's why I'm worried." Grinning lightly, Springer turned and started for the door. Frowning slightly, he knew the other wouldn't wait for him to say goodbye. Springer wasn't one for tearful partings. In a way, Hot Rod preferred it that way. It didn't feel permanent.

Harsh whispers caught his audios and he quickly snapped his head about to find the source. Finding his optics back on the yellow warrior, he found him quietly arguing with another warrior. Furrowing his optic ridges, he studied the red and black mech glaring at Sunstreaker sharply as he retorted. The sharp narrowing of optics and the tensed jaw gave away the amount of anger being conveyed in his words.

He shouldn't. He knew he shouldn't. But when his optics moved back to the aqua hues, he raised the gain on his audios trying to hear what they were saying. If he had been smart, he would have looked somewhere other than the perfect profile of the yellow mech.

"Sideswipe, aren't you tired of being such a fraggin' liar?!" Hissing through his dental plating, Sunstreaker narrowed his optics to slits of pale light. "You're too busy trying to show the world up and beat me!"

"I don't need this! Not from you!" The one called Sideswipe angrily shoved Sunstreaker's hand aside. "You're one sick slagger, you know that?"

"Why is it sick?" The yellow warrior set his jaw tightly as he stared waiting for an answer. Sideswipe moved to answer but stopped. Back going stiff, the red mech angeled his head a little in Roddy's direction before ripping away.

"Forget it. You're impossible to talk to." Snarling in reply, he marched for the exit, gait stiff and heavy. Roddy looked amazed. Gaping a little, he watched Sideswipe leave before daring to look back at Sunstreaker.

The energon in his lines went cold when their optics met. Icy glare bearing into him, he considered getting up and making a run for it. This feeling became especially prominent as Sunstreaker pushed to his feet. Only, as he told his body to move, he remained frozen to the chair gasping as Sunstreaker slid into the seat next to him.

"Hasn't anyone ever told you that listening in to conversations isn't polite? I would hate to have to teach you manners." The voice rolled through his processor and he automatically leaned back and away from the threat to his person.

"I… I don't know what you mean!" Roddy's voice hit a shrill note as he quickly tried to rise. Normally, he'd be ready for a fight. His compulsive nature always sprung him into action. But this time he was knowingly in the wrong. And it didn't help matters being newly repaired.

"You're a lousy liar." Shock ran through his red frame when the other spoke, a smirk pulling at Sunny's lips. "So… what are your brilliant deductions about what you heard?"

Hot Rod continued to lean back almost falling from the chair as Sunstreaker leaned closer. "I… I think I need to stay out of this."

"You do. But I'm asking anyway." Coldly purring out that tone, yellow fingers suddenly brushes a freshly repaired seam causing Hot Rod to jump.

"He's obviously… important to you."

Sharp optics flared in response and slowly the yellow warrior leaned away. Sunstreaker grimaced and turned to face forward away from the shaken up cavalier. "Oh really? So tell me genius, what gave you that idea?"

"Well… anger like that… is fueled generally by love. Or… something of the like." Hot Rod worried about the wording. He worried about his own skidplate to be honest. In the end, he would die from being honest to a fault.

Sunstreaker drew his optic ridges together sharply at this then began to laugh. "Slagger…" Smirking, he turned and met Hot Rod's confused look. "Why don't you come back to my room with me?"

"What?" His vocalizer cracked in his response and he jerked a bit when yellow digits crept up his arm. "You're… going to beat the frag out of me aren't you?"

"Do you want me to?" The way his lips curled up into a sly smile was enough to get his fuel pump rushing. Yet, for all the innuendo and light suggestive touches, Hot Rod kept his optics on Sunstreaker's optics. Through the planned and perfect expression, he felt drawn in and lost in that pain buried deep beneath the bravado.

"You don't even know my name." Offering this lamely, he tried to shift away.

"Does it matter?" Sunstreaker smirked even more as he leaned in after Roddy's escaping form.

"It does to me!" Pure shock filled his expression with the widening flare of optics. "Then tell me."

"I…" Dropping off, he watched the other's face. For all the beauty in the world, he wouldn't have bent to such an absurd request. But the fine line tension in that face that could be so smooth and perfect were the last enticement to make him fall. "Hot Rod…"

"Well, Hot Rod… what do you say?"

Fans kicked in as he knew this wouldn't end well. Nothing compulsive he did ever turned out right. But it didn't stop the condemning nod of his head. "All right." With those words, the strong hand gripped his hand and pulled him from his seat. ]]

-+-

The echo of agony and self regret rang through his processor as he walked down the halls of the newest base. A silver hand pressed to his forehead trying to push the dull ache away physically. His processor wouldn't stop whizzing the memories through his waking conscious of the screams and the begging of his comrade to be saved. He'd left him to die.

It wasn't like they were close. They were a pretty new team, but they had relied on him. This had been his team, his responsibility. He let them die. Completing the mission earned him pats on the back and words of commending his efforts. The command staff had even wanted to give him a new team. A new team… A new group of bots to be led to their deaths.

Gasping at the twist of his spark, he stumbled and fell against the wall shifting only to push his hands over his ringing audios. Names and faces flashed through his processes driving him further to the brink. He'd told them this wouldn't happen again. Hot Rod had decided as he'd ran through the tunnels that he'd work alone from then on. His own cowardice refused to risk anymore lives. Orders be damned.

Fans kicked in and tried to cool his heated systems as he hammered down the emotion bubbling up in his spark. Their low hum drowned out the sound of the world around him, droning and mixing with the pain in his head. He didn't even notice the footsteps that approached until a gentle touch slid over his forearm.

Jerking sharply he slapped the hand away and shoved his back into the wall. Wild optics flared as he stared into the familiar face coming into focus. His brows knit together as he glared at the handsome features that trained themselves into a hard mask. "Get away from me Sunstreaker."

The yellow warrior's optics flashed and his jaw tensed at that command. Without a word he snatched Roddy's hand and yanked him from the wall only to drag him down the hall. Hot Rod struggled at first, trying desperately to pull his hand from the vice like grip. Sunstreaker wouldn't let go. He shouldn't have been surprised. When Sunny set his processor on something, it couldn't be derailed.

"Sunstreaker! Stop!" His protest was cut short as he went careening through a door into a bunk. Stumbling a few steps, he whirled around and set a glare on the other. "Is that all I am to you, you fragger?! Take me to the berth and play with me? I'm not in the mood!"

"You're such an idiot." Without further explanation, sure strides, only two, breached the distance between them. A yellow hand pressed into his chest and made him walk backward until his knees hit the berth. The surge to fight back hit him, but Sunny pushed harder causing him to sit on the edge. "Stay."

Shooting his head up to stare at that serious expression on the warrior's face, he almost cried out when that hand moved away. For all his screaming, he didn't want Sunny to walk away. The elder took a few steps back and yanked a chair from the small desk in the room to place it in front of Hot Rod. Watching in perplexity, Roddy marveled at how the other sat in the chair and crossed his arms over his chest reclining in a disgruntled but relaxed manner.

"So. Before I beat the slag out of you for being stupid, tell me what the frag your problem is. I heard your mission was a success." Brilliant sea blue optics set carefully on his own. Something in his spark turned and sent a sick feeling into his tank at those words. Instead, a bitter laugh bubbled up into his chest.

"Success? Success?! Yeah. I did what they wanted!" Bittersweet venom was laced in his words as his voice grew louder. "I killed them all! They're all dead!"

Optic ridges rose slightly on handsome features before knitting together with the narrowing of his optics. Sunstreaker tensed slightly before leaning forward resting his elbows on his knees. Roddy slowly slid into the same posture, their heads coming close together as the fight left him. "This is war, Hot Rod."

His optics surged bright as he looked into that drawn expression. It was calm and irritating. How could he be so calm! "They were my responsibility! And when he begged for my help… I had to run away! I had to get away for the mission! I left Dealer to die!"

Hands shot up and cupped his face with surprisingly firm but gentle motions. When he tried to look away, Sunny forced him to look into his face. "You're so self-centered in your pity."

"What?!" With a violent jerk, he pulled away from Sunstreaker and shoved himself into the wall trying to get away. "You son of a—"

"Please, Roddy…" Sunny grumbled, rising to his feet slowly. "You are so certain that everything is your fault. You think you're a walking cataclysm waiting to destroy everything you touch. Don't think I don't pay attention to what you say. It's your own sort of narcissism."

"The only narcissist in this room is you." Snorting sharply, he drew his legs up and pressed his knees to his chest plate.

"Oh, I know I am. You should know by now I wouldn't deny it." Roddy, listened to those words as he carefully watched Sunny slip up onto the berth. "I'm just saying you can't seem to do anything without thinking the failures are your own personal discretion. When we go out onto the field of battle… we all know we could die. It's our choice. You didn't make it for them."

"What do you care?" The petty retort burned in his vocalizer as he dipped his head behind his knees slowly. "Thought this was just an arrangement of…"

"Shut up. Do you really think I'd keep coming back to your pitiful aft just because you're pretty?" Snorting in complete disdain, he shifted on the berth, the hiss of hydraulics betraying his motion. But Hot Rod didn't look up till he felt the warm plating slide against his side. Turning his head, he watched in awe as Sunny sat beside him. The elder didn't try to hug him or touch him beyond the press of their sides together. Gazing at the perfect profile, Hot Rod felt his spark ache more for different reasons.

"It's not like you talk to me all that often. Not about anything important." His voice sounded pathetic even to his own audios. Tearing his gaze away from the yellow warrior, he stared at his knees feeling equally as pathetic.

"I guess I don't. Why would you want to know about my pathetic antics anyway?" The slide of metal against the metal wall told him that Sunny had turned to look at him..

"I don't know. Because I always make you listen to mine?" Shrugging weakly, his forehead finally pressed into his knees. The younger didn't want to know how pitiful he looked. Didn't want to admit that he wanted to hide in the dark and just wallow in his own self hate. "Can't you just distract me?"

"I thought you were pissed about me using you for a quick interface." The tone sounded flat and irritated making Roddy smile just a little.

"Is that the only way you know how to distract someone?"

"Keep pushing it, slagger. I'll knock you on your aft." For all the threat in his words, Roddy knew that teasing edge laced into Sunny voice.

"If I had an energon goodie for every time I heard you say that to me…" Cutting off, he let out a soft gasp as an arm slid about his waist. His body was then pulled carefully into the warm torso. The touch where gentle, held no feeling of questing intimacy. At least, not the kind he was used to receiving from the larger mech.

"He's my spark twin."

"What?" In the midst of the warmth, he shot his head up sharply to stare in surprise at the other. Spark twin? Who…? "Sideswipe?"

The other nodded his head slowly, but his optics were staring holes through the wall on the other side of the room. "We split up when we were younger… I went into the Autobot ranks…"

Hot Rod couldn't erase the shock on his face as he looked at the mech holding onto him so desperately. Even though Sunstreaker's face stayed tight and his jaw stayed set, the way that arm clung to his waist let him know how much he didn't want to talk about this. "Spark twins… that's… I didn't know…"

"That they actually existed? Probably because people think they're freaks of nature." Snarling a little, he turned a glare to his lover. "After going through pit… I let him play it off that we weren't. That we were complete strangers."

"So you left to make it easier for him…" It hurt to admit it for his lover. Watching those piercing optics, he felt his tank turn in a sudden desire to purge. "And he let you?"

Sunstreaker gave a slow shrug of his shoulders. "He didn't stop me."

"You wanted him to." Softly completing the thought, his spark felt like it ripped as Sunny's head bowed slightly to stare at his own thighs. "So… you are in love with him." Sunny stiffened at the observation causing him to hurriedly go on. "Well… why wouldn't you? He's your other half…"

Darkened aqua optics turned to look at Roddy in complete silence. After a long moment, Sunny moved pulling his slighter form with him. Languidly slipping onto his back on his berth, Roddy felt himself being pulled on top of him. "You should get some rest."

Tipping his head up, he placed his chin on the glossy paint of his lover's chest staring at him in shock. Maybe Sunstreaker did know how to distract. Only, now he felt more confused and achy than before. Added into the pain of killing his entire team, now he knew why is lover's optics always looked distant. He knew why the other wore that shell of anger and bravado. And he knew why he would never be more to Sunstreaker than an outlet to his pain.

Giving in to the command from the yellow mech, he turned his helm to rest his audio against his chest. The slow pulse of Sunstreaker's spark echoed in his helm as he whispered softly. "All right. Recharge well…"

"Sure. Good night." The flippant reply caused him to flinch. What could he say?

The desire to speak fled though as strong fingers found his back and slowly rolled over his armor and dermal plating. It felt so good that his internals couldn't do anything but purr as those hands drew him closer to the verge of recharge. As he slipped offline, he marveled at one thought. It didn't take an overload to remind him why he kept coming back to these arms.

-+-

[[Rebooting sluggishly, Hot Rod felt the electricity shoot through his network reviving his limbs and sensors from the deep recharge he'd slipped into. A low sigh left his vents in contented reverie for the sated feeling in his body. At least this time he didn't feel like he'd been battered to get that way.

Suddenly his back arched as a hand slid over his spoiler shocking him further into wakefulness. Oh, that was a new feeling. Bringing his optics online, he turned his head on the berth and stared into the dimly lit optics of the yellow warrior beside him. Sunstreaker smirked a little from his spot on his side. "Good morning."

What? Hot Rod felt his body shiver as those fingers pushed down his back then back up into the seam between his upper back and waist. Silver fingers clawed into the berth as he drew in air sharply. "Nn…"

"I really can't get over how sensitive you are." The elder mused softly as he curled his fingers into the wiring they found.

"You're… still here…" Shuddering hard, he couldn't stop from pressing into the hand in his back.

"So I am."

"Why...?" The last time, Sunstreaker had put him through a rough bout of interfacing only to be gone when he woke up. Hot Rod expected that. This… was not expected in the least. But then, he'd not expected the warrior to approach him again either when they ran into one another again.

"Because you looked cute while you were recharging?" Offering helpfully, the warrior slipped his fingers out of Roddy's back causing the younger to dim his optics with a purr. "And maybe I was fascinated by the idea of seeing you wake up? Does it matter?"

"I… I guess not." Turning his head the other way, Hot Rod dimmed his optics further as he sank back onto his chest against the berth. He couldn't recall why he'd let this happen again.

"You're not getting sappy on me are you?" The warrior groaned and flopped onto his back with a thud. "I knew it. I'd finally find the sappy idiot that expected romance out of me. Fraggit."

Hot Rod froze when Sunny lifted off the berth and suddenly pressed his hands down on either side of his body. His internal fans roared to life as he felt the warmth emanating off of Sunny's body so close to his before Sunstreaker spoke again. "Don't expect me to bring you sweet energon and woo you."

Flaring at this, Hot Rod roughly flipped himself onto his back to glare at him angrily. "I'm not a slaggin' femme you glitch! Don't treat me like one!"

"You could have fooled me." Roddy wanted to retort, but he stopped when fingers moved over the collar of his chestplate. "You almost have the curves and your waist is slender enough."

"You are a complete aft." Glaring at him sharply, he fought the urge to strangle Sunny when he started to laugh.

"I guess." Shifting to rest his elbow on the berth, Sunny cradled his head in his hand as he dropped his gaze to trail over Roddy's body. "So… plan on telling all your friends that you've dragged me into the berth twice now?"

"Are you joking?" Roddy snorted in irritation and turned his head to stare at the wall ignoring that amused gaze. "One, I'm not like that. Two, I want to go somewhere in the ranks and not be seen as some stupid playbot. And three, when you get tired of me, if no one knows, I won't be pitied."

"You've really thought that through. Good. I'll go with that." Turning his head, Hot Rod's optics flared at the sight of the feral grin on his lover's face. "But there is one thing you should know about me, so listen hard. I don't give a slag about anyone. And I won't stick my neck out for them either. All I care about is my own aft and that's it. So don't expect anything from me."

"Fragger." Covering the stab of hurt in his chest with a sharp retort, he doesn't look at Sunstreaker. Looking at him always lead him to giving in. But then, maybe this would work out better for both of them. If neither got attached, when everything fell apart as he knew it would, neither would get hurt.

"Is that my cue to get out?" Surprisingly softer in tone, Roddy made the mistake of looking at Sunstreaker when he spoke. The dim lighting of his optics caught the younger's attention and he felt like the air had been ripped out of his vents.

"No…"

Sunstreaker smiled lightly and slid his arms about Roddy's waist before rolling onto his back pulling him along. "Masochist."

"Shut up." Yeah, much better this way. ]]

-+-

"Wait…. What?" Hot Rod's optics seemed to haze over as he stared up at the warrior as he leaned in close. "What are you trying to tell me?"

Sunstreaker pressed his lips together in irritation as he glanced away at other bots sending them strange looks. They rarely talked in public, and Sunstreaker never 'simply' conversed with anyone. "You heard me."

"But… why? Why would you find that out for me?" Pressing further, all concern of what the others thought became a distant concern.

"Just shut up and take it!" Without another word, the yellow warrior grabbed his hand and shoved a data disc into it. When he pulled back, he glared at Roddy's silver hand a long moment.

Hot Rod finally pulled his gaze away in order to look at the disc he clutched desperately in his hand. A ticket to redemption for the horror he'd called down on himself. But for all the elation bubbling up in him, he didn't understand. "Sunstreaker…"

"Look. I couldn't take it anymore…" The harsh whisper brought Roddy's attention back up to the profile of his lover. "Just… do whatever you have to do. But I'll slag your aft if you do more than just save that fragger."

"I don't believe it. You're…"

"Shut it!" Sunny snapped, sending him an icy glare. "Just go, all right? Before I change my mind and tie you up so you can't."

The smallest hint of a smile pulled at his lips as he faced the look head on. For the first time since their relationship started, he found it practically impossible to keep from touching Sunstreaker in public. "You know… I still need to plan."

"Do it on your own time. I want no part of it." Hissing back, Sunstreaker took a step back when Roddy moved closer.

"I don't mean it that way, Sunshine."

"Don't you dare call me that."

Giving a soft laugh, he clutched the disk to his chassis before sweeping by Sunstreaker. "Block B… Room 36." His words were only loud enough for Sunny to hear as their shoulders grazed.

Catching the subtle, defeated nod, Hot Rod swept down the halls leaving his lover behind. He needed to plan. Rescuing someone from the depths of Decepticon hell wouldn't be easy. Doubt simply didn't exist in his mind that he could fail. What bothered his processor more… stood a ways behind him unmoving.

What ever happened to "others be damned"? Either way, he reveled in the fact that for once in his bleak existence, he felt driven to elation. Something in the back of his processor warned him away, but he didn't listen. For once, he didn't want to listen.

-+-