The Dance of Memories Circle My Mind and Remind Your Not Here
"Don't expect me to smile when you walk out the door and promise to call me. We
both know you won't and I'm not waiting for my heart to realize your NOT COMING
BACK!" she screamed at the quickly disappearing tail fins of his black car, that carried a
man she wished to love. No a man she wished would love her. The car never slowed to
her expectation. She was soaked by the thick fog and crowded around her so thick that
earth herself wanted her to forget this one night stand. She wrapped her plush robe tighter
around her body, as if to protect her fragile heart.
She should never have fallen for the clique lines, that reminded her of the many
romance novels that filled her lonely nights. she was supposed to be smarter than that.
She wished o be part of the books she read but she knew men like that never really
existed, they played the part till they got in your pants then they run. Those hours she
spent with him though she could of swore this was her fairytale ending, her happily ever
after, her euphoria was a high she never knew before. The lines he used will he slowly
stripped her down, cased her heart in satin, she wanted to touch his butterscotch tan, run
her hands down him, do whatever he asked of her. Because of those lines and her foolish
heart to forget she was left in the moment alone and without 'her love' to comfort her.
After she gave in to him, after they had the passionate kissing, after the sex which to
her was ecstacy. After the rosy colour of her cheeks disappear, and they drift of to sleep
in each others arms. She wakes to find the front door closing with the usual squeak, and
Dean not in bed with her. She rushed down the dark oak hallway only stopping to snatch
up a plush robe ( no need to have the neighbors call the cops for indecent exposer). She
rushed out into the fog watching at the front step as her heart broke as he disappeared
into fog, leaving her memories of intense bliss and a fading black car." Take your
promises with you when you leave, I don't need them to remind me that you left, that
your not coming back" she whisper to the fog as she retreated into the house with tears
blurring her vision more than the fog, and locked the door.
She couldn't wait, couldn't cry. Her life was beginning as well as her career as a
traveling yoga instructor. It didn't seem like a career, but to Lisa it was what she wanted.
To see the world, and help people along the way. She still hadn't left her house. She
couldn't even though her brain knew Dean wasn't coming back, her heart promised her
he would, so every night she'd watch tv on mute waiting for a phone call that would
never happen, to hear a voice that will never be heard again that has already began fading
with the distortion of time. It was crazy and she knew it, but she wanted to tell him, had
to tell him. She was having his child( maybe that would make him stay), so she waited.
She could she herself now waddling down in her mothers pearl white dress, down a
velvet blue carpet to a waiting man in a black tux silhouetted by the fading sun. Dean
saying that he'd love her forever, for her to become a Winchester. She like the way that
sounded Lisa Winchester.