Oh, My Easter Bonnet!

This small fic was written for wandamarie

1

Eileen's Easter Bonnet

Takes place a year before the events in The Fourth of July Deer and six months before Severus' Christmas Wish. This story is part of the Never Again series, see my profile for the complete list of stories in the series. Harry and Lexy are 11, Ron just turned 12, and Eileen is almost 3.

Harry's POV:

It was the Saturday before Easter and Ron and Ginny were sleeping over, because they were supposed to join us for the Easter egg hunt at Hogwarts tomorrow. Molly, their mum, was going to Floo them over tomorrow morning, until I begged Dad and Mum to let me have a sleepover. Since it was our holiday break, Dad agreed. Especially since he had to be a judge for the Best Easter Bonnet contest, and Mum was participating in the Easter Bake Sale, so we all had to go to school early tomorrow morning.

The Easter egg hunt and the bonnet contest had started three years ago, Uncle Al, who's Headmaster, had decided it was a good way to introduce little wizard kids and their families to Hogwarts before they got their letters, so they'd be more familiar with the school and not as homesick. I'd been going back and forth to Hogwarts since I was little, so I knew the school very well, since my dad, Healer Snape, often made house calls there, and Uncle Al and Aunt Min used to babysit me when I was around three, my sister Eileen's age. We would be meeting my other friends, Blaise and Hermione, and Hermione's little sister Robyn, there.

I'd just come out of my room, after fixing up the spare bed for Ron, Ginny would sleep in Lexy's room, when I heard my dad and grandpa talking in the kitchen. I slipped quietly down the hall, practicing moving like a panther, without a sound, I wanted to see if I could surprise Dad and Grandpa.

"So, are you all set for Easter, Sev?" asked Tobias, that's my grandpa's real name.

"I would say so," Dad replied. "After the children open their Easter baskets, we're going to Floo over to the school. Would you like to come with us?"

"Sev, I'm a Muggle, and I'm too old for school," Grandpa joked.

Dad rolled his eyes at him. They were sitting across from each other at the table, each drinking a cup of tea. "You mean you don't want to live your childhood over again?" he teased.

"God forbid! What's old Al got planned for this year?"

"The usual. The Easter egg hunt and the bonnet contest. He was going to do a parade, but Min and I put paid to that scheme."

I crept up behind Dad, he had his back to me, and poked him. "Gotcha!"

He jumped, then cranked his head around and scowled at me. "Harry, for the love of Merlin! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

"No. You didn't hear me, did you?"

Dad shook his head. "No. Did you set up your room like I told you?"

"Yes. Don't worry, Ron's not going to sleep on the floor." Then I turned to my grandpa, who was still very good-looking despite him being the very old age of fifty-one, and announced, "Hey, Grandpa, did Dad tell you that he's gonna be the judge for the Easter bonnet contest this year?"

Grandpa nearly choked on his tea. "Sev, why didn't you tell me?"

My father shot me a dirty look. "It must have slipped my mind."

Grandpa started smirking. "So, Sev, how'd old Dumbles con you into that job?"

Dad frowned. "Don't ask."

"Dad lost a bet with Uncle Al," I chimed in, unable to resist. "He bet that Uncle Al couldn't beat him in Muggle poker and Uncle Al won, and said Dad had to judge the Easter Bonnet Contest as a forfeit, since he wanted to run the egg hunt this year."

Grandpa burst out laughing. "I don't believe it! You got your arse whipped by a first time player, Severus? Have you learned nothing from me?"

"It was beginner's luck. I never would have played if I'd know what sort of marker the old coot was going to call in."

"You mean you didn't ask for the stakes beforehand?"

"I did. He said I could owe him a favor. I figured it would probably be something like free potions or a checkup, not being a bloody judge for a hat contest!" Dad said grumpily. "I mean, I'm a Healer, not a fashion designer!"

"You were had royally, Sev," Grandpa told him, then started laughing again.

Dad just glared at him.

Finally Tobias wiped his eyes and said, "Maybe I will come after all."

"Real nice, Dad. You'll come just so you can see me make a fool out of myself."

"Now, Severus, I'm sure you'll do fine. How hard can it be, after all? Is Alaina entering it?"

"Unfortunately, no. She said hats aren't her thing. If she was, I could have pleaded bias and gotten out of it."

"But she baked her spice cake with cream cheese frosting for the bake sale," I added.

"Oh, now I'm definitely coming! I wouldn't dare pass up Alaina's spice cake," Grandpa said, his blue eyes lighting up. "What time should I get here?"

"Eight-thirty in the morning," Dad told him. "By then the kids will have eaten breakfast and opened their baskets."

"What about Ron and Ginny, Dad? Where's their baskets?" I asked, not thinking it fair that all of us would be opening presents except the Weasleys.

"I'm sure Molly will drop them off." Dad replied, knowing that I had stopped believing in the Easter bunny when I was nine.

"Oh, okay. Where's Mum and Lexy?"

"Out getting the ingredients for the spice cake."

"Can I have a snack? I'm starving."

"A small one. You don't want to spoil your dinner."

I turned to get a glass of milk and some chocolate biscuits from the tin when I heard the pitter patter of two little feet coming down the hallway.

Next thing I heard was Eileen's voice, calling, "C'mon, Inky! Let's show Daddy!"

In marched Eileen, dragging poor Inky along by the strings of a very large Easter bonnet covered with paper flowers and fake jewels and a big stuffed blue bird. Obviously my baby sister had made it herself, out of one of her old doll blankets and some paste and string and I don't know what all else. The bird was slowly listing to one side, and the front of the bonnet covered one of Inky's emerald eyes. Eileen had tied a big sloppy bow under the poor panther's chin and was tugging him into the kitchen by the rest of the strings. It was the most colorful, crazy, and ugly Easter bonnet I'd ever seen.

"Merlin, Eileen!" I groaned upon seeing them. "Get that off him! He's a boy panther, not a girl!"

"Daddy, lookit how pretty Inky looks in the Easter bunnit I made!" announced my sister proudly. She was grinning like she'd just won the contest. Eileen has Alaina's curly hair, but it's dark like Dad's and so are her eyes. She's adorable, but also nothing but trouble.

She tugged again on Inky's strings, and the panther reluctantly followed her and then sat down in the middle of the kitchen floor and refused to budge. Plainly, he'd had enough of playing dress up.

Not that I blamed him. He probably felt humiliated, like I did when Mum told me to play house with Eileen if Lexy wasn't home.

Dad turned around and saw Inky sitting there, his eye covered with the pink fabric and the blue bird hanging off the side and covered his mouth with his hand, trying not to laugh. "Uh . . . that's very . . . interesting, Eileen."

"It's bootiful, right? I made it my own self!" declared my baby sister proudly.

"I think it's the ugliest bonnet I've ever seen," I remarked before I could think better of it.

"Is not! Take it back, Hawwy!" Eileen cried, giving me a look reminiscent of Dad's.

"Harry!" Dad said.

"What? It's the truth. Don't you think it's ugly?"

"Meanie!" Eileen cried. Then she dropped the strings of her hideous creation and kicked me in the shin.

"Oww!" I yelled. "You little brat!"

"You is bad, Hawwy!"

Before I could do something I would regret later, Dad picked her up and sat her on his knee. "Eileen Lily, you don't kick your brother. Understand?"

Eileen looked up at him with her huge eyes and her bottom lip quivered. "But . . . Daddy . . .Hawwy was mean! My Easter bunnit is not ugly!" She started to snivel and two huge tears fell down her cheeks.

Now I felt sort of bad. I hadn't meant to hurt her feelings. But then I rubbed my shin and frowned at her.

"It's an Easter bonnet, snippet," Dad corrected. "Harry was wrong to say that, but you shouldn't have kicked him either, young lady. You don't kick or hit anyone, Eileen! Especially not your big brother. Now say you're sorry."

"No! I won't!" she cried defiantly.

Now both Lexy and I knew better than to say that to Dad's face. Eileen, being two, hadn't learned that lesson yet. But she was gonna learn it now.

"Eileen Lily Snape! Don't you tell me no. Do you want to spend some time in the corner?"

Eileen started bawling. "No –o-o! No time out!"

"Tell Harry you're sorry then."

But Eileen could give a mule lessons in stubborn. "Don' wanna!"

Dad's eyes narrowed in a look I knew well. It was his do-it-or-else look. "One."

Eileen started blubbering again. "No! No count!"

"Are you going to say you're sorry?"

Her lip stuck out and she shook her head. Merlin, but she thought she could outstubborn Dad! Fat chance!

"Two."

Their eyes locked.

"Well?" Dad demanded sternly, never once looking away.

"Okay . . ." she sniffled, glancing away from him.

Dad set her on her feet. "Go on then."

Eileen slowly dragged her head up and said softly, "Sowwy, Hawwy."

"Very good!" Dad said.

Until Eileen added, "I no like you no more, Hawwy! Youze not my brudder!" Then she ran over to Inky and threw her arms about the panther and cried into his fur.

I groaned. Great! Now she was pulling the pathetic little girl card. "Aww, come on, Eileen!" I said, knowing if I didn't apologize to her, I'd be in trouble. "Stop crying, okay? I'm sorry I called you bonnet ugly." Even if it is true, I added silently. I knelt down and put an arm around her. "Forgive me?"

Silence.

Inky began purring.

Slowly, my baby sister lifted her head from his plush ebony fur and looked at me. "I'm thinkin' 'bout it."

I rolled my eyes. "Brat!" I muttered. Sometimes she made me want to slap her one. I reached over and straightened the bonnet on Inky. He nuzzled my hand and I scratched behind his ears. "Poor fellow! Stuck being a hatrack," I crooned. My little sister had no mercy.

Eileen frowned at me. "He no hatrack, Hawwy! He a model!"

For some reason that made Grandpa crack up.

I looked up. Dad was even laughing a little. Go figure!

"Eileen, he's a panther." I tried to explain the facts of life to her. "And cats can't be models, only people can."

"Why?"

"That's just how it is." She cocked her head at me. Since she seemed to be listening to my brotherly advice, I said, "And Inky's not a doll, he's a living creature with feelings. Panthers—especially boy ones—don't wear clothes." I stressed. "It's humiliating. You want all the other panthers to make fun of him?"

She shook her head. "No-o-o . . . but Hawwy, Inky likes my Easter bunnit. Don't you, boy?" She gave Inky a squeeze. The panther huffed and looked at me pleadingly.

"Give up, Harry," Grandpa said, wiping tears from his eyes. "You won't win this round. She's as stubborn as her old man."

I gritted my teeth. Grandpa forgot, I was stubborn too—like both my dads. And I was also cunning like a Slytherin, whose House I'd been Sorted into. "You know, Eileen, your Easter bonnet is so nice that I'll bet Mum would like to wear it."

"You do?"

"Yeah. But she won't like it with cat hair on it. So why don't you take it off Inky and find something else to model it on?"

"Like what?"

"Err . . ." I was at a loss.

"I know! I know!" Eileen shrilled. All of a sudden she yanked the bonnet off Inky. "You can wear it, Hawwy!"

"What? No! No way!" I went to scramble to my feet. No way on earth was I wearing that thing!

Too late.

Eileen stuck the bloody thing on me before I could get away. Then she did the worst thing yet. She threw her arms about me and kissed me. "Aww! You looks bootyful, Hawwy!"

I wanted to Evanesco myself. "Aww, Merlin, Eileen!"

Before I could untangle myself from her embrace and pull the loathsome hat off, our Floo chimed and out of it came Ron and Ginny. They came right into the kitchen, of course, and my best friend stopped dead and cried, "Harry? Bloody hell!"

"Ronald, watch your mouth!" scolded my dad. "There's a baby listening!"

Ron blushed redder than his hair. "Sorry, Healer Sev. It's just . . ."

"Harry, why are you wearing . . .that hat on your head?" asked Ginny, giggling.

"It my Easter bunnit, Ginny!" Eileen announced. "Hawwy's modeling it!"

"Aww! That's so cute!" Ginny smiled.

Ron collapsed on the floor, howling.

I shoved the pink brim out of my eyes and shot my best mate a death glare. "Ron, I swear, if you tell anyone about this . . ."

"Of course I won't, Harry!" Ron gasped. "They'd have to see it to believe it!" He went off into gales of laughter again.

Little sisters! They were worse than getting the galloping trots. Little did I know, this was only the beginning of the Easter escapades that would occur.

Next: Easter morning, where two boys stir up mischief after finding a few eggs . . .

Just to clear up things-this is a story featuring a two year old girl, one who is advanced for her age, but still TWO. So she sometimes mispronounces words, like Harry's name and other ones. Thus, the w in place of r's and that kind of thing. I have deliberately misspelled words to illustrate this, and no, this is not meant to be funny and I'm not on crack. If you've ever spent time with small children, that's how they sound sometimes. At times Eileen will speak clearly, other times not so much. This is meant to be a snippet of life of Harry and his family in the Never Again series, if you don't like family fics with small children in them, then you probably won't like this story. However, it does feature Severus' POV in later chapters. If you haven't read the previous stories in this series, please go and do so, before saying anyone is OOC, it will all make sense if you start from the beginning.