Fractured

Just short piece in a lovely little universe where a certain Mary Sue doesn't exist.

You Want More?

Casey was gathering his scattered items of clothing from around Severide's bed. The morning sun was casting rays through the bedroom windows. Severide was still on the bed, not a thread of clothing on and his manhood on display as Casey questioned somewhat urgently, "What is this? What are we doing?"

"Having mind-blowing sex every few days." Severide grinned from ear to ear, still reeling from their early morning activities.

"So what is this?" he questioned again, he needed to know, was this just sex? He didn't want that. He wanted to define what they were doing, he wanted Severide to tell him that it was more than just sex but he'd never reveal that, he wouldn't admit his need to be wanted.

"Friends with benefits…" Severide replied casually.

"Are you seeing other people?" he questioned as he pulled on his jeans.

"Not specifically…" Severide shrugged as Casey slipped his t-shirt on over his bed hair. He loved Casey's bed hair. He loved how he looked in the morning, especially that sort of dishevelled just had three rounds of sex look. That look he had right now. His eyes were glistening in the light. His lips were a little swollen, his arms a little marked from the roughness of Severide's hold because if he had the choice he'd never let go of him. But he wasn't about to admit that to Casey.

Casey's eyes fell, his lips parted slightly, trying to show Severide nothing but showing him all too much. The man knew him too well.

"You want more?" Severide questioned. Of course he was right because he knew when Casey was in something he put his all into it.

"If you don't care then I don't." And with that Casey left through the front door.

"Casey hold up…" He burst out the door after him, still wearing only his boxers.

"I gotta go," Casey stated. "Thought you never wanted us to turn up at shift at the same time… I'll see you later… Lieutenant Severide."

Severide sighed heavily as he watched Casey go. Damnit. This wasn't happening. He was falling in love. Scrap that. He'd already fallen in love. He cared way too much. And he kept letting him walk away.

As the clock hit 8am Severide strode into the station, that morning's conversation played heavily on his mind, he didn't want to give it a second thought but he couldn't ignore the look on Casey's face and he couldn't ignore the feelings he held towards him. The feelings he'd held towards him for a lot longer than he wanted to admit to himself. But he didn't want things to go any further. He didn't want to jeopardise what they had going, he didn't want to jeopardise their friendship but perhaps he'd already done that. He knew the question that Casey had really wanted to ask him was – are we exclusive? Are we a 'we'?

And the truth was Severide hadn't slept with anyone since that incredible night two months ago because he really didn't want to be with anyone else but Casey. So why didn't he tell him that? Why didn't he put the man out his misery and tell him the truth?

Because he was scared. Lieutenant Kelly Severide was scared. And now he was sitting at the squad table because he didn't want to see Casey, because if he saw him he'd want to apologise, he'd want to explain, but he was being stubborn, Casey would call him pig-headed. But he wasn't going to apologise because what if he'd just read him wrong.

Casey had retreated to his quarters once he poured himself a steaming hot cup of coffee. He sat at his desk staring blankly ahead, his head repeating that morning's conversation. Was he being an idiot for not just coming out with it? Why couldn't he just tell Severide that he wanted more, that he needed it? Perhaps he'd realised the truth already, he'd known Severide for such a long time, knew he didn't do commitment, he'd been scared off it with past experiences, he was all about the sex but Casey needed more than that. Not that the sex wasn't great. It was more than great. But he needed something more, he wanted commitment. He wanted it because he didn't want to end up spending his life alone. And he wanted to be with Severide, they fit, they were at ease with each other, knew what the other was thinking, and it just felt so good and so right to be in Severide's arms.

Damnit. What were they doing? Did he really want more? He was more than certain he did but what if it jeopardised what they had going? He didn't want that.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door and a beaming smile belonging to Herrmann. He waved the man in. "All right?"

"Think you can come by the bar tomorrow?"

"And give you some quotes? Sure," he smiled, "Not doin' it for free."

"I get discount though, right?"

"Do I get free drinks every time I come in to the bar?"

"Now that would just be bad for your health Lieutenant," Herrmann grinned back, "Only thinking of you."

"What are you being roped into now?" It was Severide, he was stood behind Herrmann, almost staring at Casey.

"I'll be with you about 11am, that ok?" he questioned Herrmann.

Herrmann nodded and left.

"We need to talk." Severide walked in and closed the door.

"We do, but not now." He gave a nod of agreement.

"You wanted to talk this morning?"

"That was this morning," he replied, "Now we're at work. Keeping the two very separate, right? That's what you want…"

"I don't really know what I want. All I know is that I…"

"Squad 3, Truck 81, Ambulance 61, Battalion 25. Structure fire…"

Truck 81 was first on scene. That meant Casey was in charge of this one until Boden turned up. Immediately he detected the sweet sickly smell of gas. He took note of the large sign on the side of the building. Harwood and Sons Glass. Smoke was already billowing up behind it. A middle aged man ran over the forecourt towards him.

"I'm the manager... there's more people inside..." the man coughed out.

"Know where?" Casey voiced loudly. He could hear Squad 3 roll up next to his truck.

"Back office area and shop floor I think... there was an explosion…" the man explained.

Boden and Severide strode up and flanked Casey as he was asking, "Got any explosive chemicals in there?"

"No," the man answered him, "But someone smelled gas..."

"Right," Boden ordered, "Casey, Severide, two teams each. Search and rescue. Get this gas turned off. Anyone called the gas company yet?"

"Mills with me," Casey called out as he readied his SCBA, "Herrmann with Cruz. Otis, ladder. Mouch, gas shut off valve."

Severide lugged his own tank onto his back and gave his own crew orders. "Capp with me, Tony and Clarke."

Now their adrenaline rush kicked in. Determination. Excitement. Fear even. The rush of the rescue. Casey and Severide thrived on it. By the time they entered through the front doors the place was already an inferno and fire was rolling. They knew they wouldn't have long.

"Severide, we'll take the left!" Casey shouted above the roar.

"Copy that," Severide's voice came back.

Everyone was moving quickly.

Casey and Mills were in the back of the factory by the kilns. They had got one victim out and returned to search for others. Herrmann and Cruz were each carrying a victim to the exit, stepping over debris and dodging fire pockets as they went. The gas had been turned off at the mains but more was lingering unseen in the building, waiting for its chance to ignite. Severide and Capp had cleared the right side of the building and were heading out past stacks of large glass sheets behind Clarke and Tony when Boden's voice crackled over the radio. "Give me an update..."

"We're pulling out Chief. Casey and Mills are just finishing clearing the back," Severide replied as Squad made their way out of the front of the building

"Casey, you don't have long," Boden warned.

"Copy Chief. Just one guy left. But we got him," Casey replied.

"Make it quick then," Boden responded.

Mills was helping the final victim out with Casey right behind him when he heard a creaking and groaning. Something was about to go up. Mills wasn't going to be able to move fast enough while he was supporting most of the victim's weight so Casey shot forward and shoved him out of the way as the blast hit.

The force of the explosion flung Casey back more than half way across the factory floor, dumping him in debris several yards away from where Mills lay on top of the victim he had been carrying. Exactly in the spot that Casey had shoved him to a few seconds earlier.

Everyone heard the explosion that came from within the factory. Severide looked back at the door he had just come out of, watching and hoping to see Casey and Mills walking out carrying that last victim between them. One minute. Nothing. Damnit. Casey was still inside. Fuck. Severide was already putting his mask back on when Boden's voice boomed into the radio. "Casey? You copy?"

Silence.

"Mills? Copy?"

Again no response.

"We'll get 'em Chief," Severide said firmly. "Capp, Tony, with me." He donned his helmet and headed back inside.

Casey groaned as he slowly regained consciousness. Why the hell did everything hurt so much? Everything was muffled, as if he was underwater. He couldn't see anything, couldn't hear anything. He squeezed his eyes closed. Still nothing. He could feel the heat of the roaring flames. He was in the middle of a damn fire and he couldn't see a thing. Couldn't hear anything. Save for a strange encompassing buzzing noise. Of course. His mask. The inside was splattered with blood. He must have hit his head. That explained why it felt as if it would burst open at any second. He reached up one hand to pull off his mask. Just that tiny movement sent agony round his body. But he could see.

The air was smoke filled and hot. He struggled to breathe but he could see, although his eyes stung. He was coughing and spluttering as he tried to move from the awkward position he was lying in on his back. He had landed on his oxygen tank. It was pushing him over onto his left side. Damn. That was gonna leave a mark. He couldn't even get onto his elbows. Too much pain. Then he tried to roll to his left but agony stopped him. He didn't know what his injuries were yet. He just knew he needed to see if anyone else was down, to get everyone out of this inferno and then he could think about himself.

Suddenly he realised there was someone with him. Hands were grabbing his arms. Someone was saying something in the distance but all Casey could hear was his own heartbeat and blood rushing through his head. His own increasingly ragged breaths. He tried to move again, tried to sit up.

"Casey! Stop moving!" Severide yelled, attempting to stop Casey struggling. Piles of razor blade sharp glass had shattered all around Casey and concrete debris covered his legs. "Stop moving Case!" Severide shouted again.

But Casey wasn't listening to him. Severide could have cursed him. But he had to keep his cool. Damnit this was Casey though.

"And put your damn mask back on!" he yelled down at him.

What the hell was going on with Casey? He seemed to be in a world of his own, but at least he had stopped trying to move. Severide guessed he must have hit his head or the blast had caused an injury to his face. That would explain Casey's seeming confusion and the amount of blood.

"Casey, you gotta stay still now until we can get this stuff off you, ok?"

He and Capp were still removing handfuls of glass shards off Casey's torso and pulling concrete debris off his legs. For the most part his turnout gear had done its job as regards the glass, but Severide was less sure about the debris that had smashed into his legs.

"Severide how you doing?" Boden's voice came through his radio.

"We're with Casey, need an ambo waiting."

"You've not got long," Boden called back.

Severide quickly but carefully pulled away more debris, noticing some shards of glass embedded in his gear. Fuck. They better not be embedded in his skin. In his flesh and organs. Severide could imagine what damage they may have done. Fuck. In the light of the flames he couldn't tell what was blood, or even if there was blood. Fuck.

"Ok, Lieutenant we're clear," Capp announced.

"Can you walk?" Severide questioned Casey. "We need to get out of…"

Just to prove his point, another explosive wave of flames burst out just a few yards from where Casey still lay. Instinctively Severide dived right on top to protect him. Capp was right by his side. Casey remained quite still and didn't so much as flinch. Severide pushed himself up and stared down at him. The idiot still hadn't put his mask back on.

"Casey! Put your mask on!" Severide must have said it three times now.

No response. This time he picked up the mask himself and slipped it over Casey's bloody face.

Something wasn't right. Severide couldn't pinpoint it exactly but he knew something wasn't right at all.

TBC