Just a few things to bear in mind when reading this story so you're not confused. 1.) Shelby has returned to McKinley to reach out and establish a relationship with Rachel. 2.) Beth was not adopted by Shelby, Quinn decided to keep her. 3.) Rachel is aware that Shelby is back and this story picks up a couple of weeks after her arrival. Other than that everything else should be pretty clear/ I hope you enjoy and please leave a review. I'd love to hear your thoughts as this is my first Glee fanfic.
Standing in the ailse of the auditorium, Rachel gazed up at her mother who was standing on the centre of the stage, belting out a song from the Broadway musical Rent. Her angelic voice soaring over high notes as if it were effortless. Like she could do it in her sleep. Truth be told, she probably could. While it was normal to be awestruck by such talent, to Rachel, it wasn't just a case of admiration, it was a sense of justification. That she was in fact the daughter of someone with as much talent as she herself possesed. Her heart ached. The only thing Rachel wanted more than anything else in this world, was to be wanted by her own mother. And when Shelby Corcoran returned to Lima, to teach English and to reach out to her daughter, Rachel began to believe that for the first time in her life, she may actually get the one thing that meant the most to her.
Once Shelby had finished singing, she gazed out into the empty auditorium, and her eyes fell upon a diminutive young girl standing way back in one of the side ailses. As she glared through the blinding spotlight, she realised it was Rachel. For a split second, Shelby Corcoran stopped breathing. Something that had become a regular occurance anytime she was able to spend a moment alone in the same room as her daughter. Her baby. As Rachel slowly made her way down the aisle towards the stage, Shelby lowered her hand to her stomach, as if remembering the time, seventeen years ago, when she had carried Rachel inside her for nine months. For a long time after she had given birth, all Shelby felt inside was an emptiness. But now, it was like that emptiness had been replaced by this overwhelming feeling. A feeling she couldn't explain. It was love. But it wasn't just love, it was so much more.
As Rachel climbed the steps to the stage, Shelby turned to face her and remainded standing in the same postion. Afraid that if she approached her daughter, that she would scare her off. So she stood there patiently and allowed Rachel to come to her. "That, that was amazing", Rachel said of her birth mothers performance. Most of the time, Shelby allowed compliments go over her head, as if they were meaningless. Like they didn't matter because, in truth, it's not like she really cared what people thought. She was Shelby Corcoran. She didn't need other peoples opinions to feel justified in her talents. But coming from Rachel, it meant more to her than she thought it ever could. In fact, it was Rachel's opinion alone that matter. Because she wanted more than anything to feel accepted by her own daughter.
"Thank you", Shelby replied with an unusual warmth in her voice. Ms. Corcoran as she was known to her students and most people, what was not known for being a kind, caring, compassionate person. Most people viewed her as hard, cold, competitive and she was known to be extremely tough. But it wasn't because she didnn't care about people. The truth was, after giving Rachel up, she felt as if she couldn't allow people get close to her. Because once you let people in, it's harder to let them go. So Shelby closed herself off. It was just easier that way, because then she wouldn't form any attachment to people. And that meant saying goodbye didn't have to hurt. She had said goodby once before in her life. It was the most difficult goodbye she had ever made. So hard, it left a great big gaping hole in her heart that was never filled. Until now.
Being close to Rachel, being able to watch her go about her school day, and perform in the glee club, it was someone slowly healing old wounds. She only hoped that one day, they would have the chance to establish a proper relationship, and that she could heal the aching in her chest that she felt whenever she saw a mother with her daughter. Only time would tell what the future had in store for them. Noticing that Rachel was slightly more at ease in her presence, Shelby took a few steps towards her so that they were closer together and began to speak. "You know Rachel, when took this job and came back to Lima, I did it with the intention of reaching out to you", she said she gazed down at her daughter.
Rachel gazed up into her mothers hazel green eyes and she saw the sincerity they held as Shelby spoke. Although Rachel couldn't deny her hesitence in allowing herself to get close to the woman who gave birth to her, at the same time she couldn't help giving in. She just wanted a mother so desperately and she wan't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. But she needed reassurance. "I want you in my life. I do. But you've walked out on me twice in the past and I don't know if I can take you walking out on me a third time", Rachel said as a tear fell down her cheek. Seeing the fear in her daughter's, Shelby leaped foreward and cupped Rachel's tear stained face i her hands. "Rachel, listen to me. I am committed to this. I'm committed to you. I walked away before and everyday that I was away from you I lived with empitness that couldn't be filled by anyone. Anyone except you", she said as she wiped away a tear that had fallen down Rachel's cheek.
"I considered adoption. I thought, if I adopted a child, a child that really needed me, then I would get that chance to be a mother. But I realised that, while I would raise them as my own, treat them as my own, I would never be their mother. And that's when I thought of you. I realised that the only way I was ever going to feel whole was to come back for my child. My flesh and blood. You Rachel. You're what I need. You always have been. I didn't see that before but I do now. And I'm not going to make that mistake again. I can't allow myself too", Shelby finished as she gazed longingly into her daughter's eyes. Hoping that Rachel understood her. That she believed her. And with the slight nod of her head, Rachel had assured Shelby that she had taken every word to heart. "Okay. I'm willing to try", Rachel said as she regathered her composure. Straightening up and trying her best to stand with poise and dignity. Although it was somewhat difficult having just stood in front of Shelby Corcoran in tears.
"I just have one question", Rachel spoke up as Shelby stood by the piano gathering up her music sheets. "Yes?", Shelby asked turning to face Rachel once more. "What do I call you? I mean I know your name is Shelby and I know at school it's only respectable to call you Ms. Corcoran. But outside of school, what do I call you? Do I call you Shelby or m-mom", Rachel stuttered out the last word. Unsure if Shelby would be comfortable with it. While staring at her daughter, she thought carefully. Although it would be a dream come true to have her own daughter refer to her as mom, to end the years of anguish and misery she felt while she was absent from Rachel's life, she knew it was up to her daughter to make that decision. "Whatever you feel comfortable with", she replied simply. And both smiled at each other.
Checking the clocking an realising that it was now 9:30, Shelby burst the bubble that they had been in looked back up at Rachel. "Oh God, it's getting late. Do you need a ride home?", she asked her daughter, remebering that her daughter had shown up alone. "Are you sure? Cause I was just going to call Finn and have him pick me up", Rachel stated. Shelby waved off the idea. "Of course. Just give me a couple of minutes to close up here and then we'll go", she said. Rachel looked towards the exit and then back at Shelby. "Okay, well I have to go and grab my things from the choir room. Will I meet you in the parking lot?", she asked. Shelby nodded her head and replied with a simple okay and with that Rachel made her way down the steps, out of the auditorium and towards the choir room.
As Rachel collected her things and placed the sheet music back in the lock up with the rest of Mr. Shuesters files in his office, she was startled by the sound of a shuffling coming from the corridor. Closing the locker, she silently made her way out of the office and into the choir room. Glancing around the dark, the only light coming from the slight glare of the moonlight shinging through the window. Just then a shadown jumped out from the darkness and grabbed Rachel from behind. He quickly covered her mouth with his hand to stiffle her cries for help. Dropping her bag and her coat, Rachel struggled against him, trying desperately to break free from his restraints but failing miserably. Just then she was stopped by the sharp slicing pain just below her chest. Gazing down her eyes fell upon the knife that had been used to stab her.
Pulling the knife out, the man released is grasp on Rachel, when he noticed that the stabbing had knocked the wind out of her, slowing down her movements and stopping her screams. Rachel brought a hand up to where the knife had been just moments before and placed her hand over the gaping wound, trying to stem the flow of but but failing miserably. It wasn't slowing down and every slight movement she made caused her agonizing pain and everything she touched left a bloody stain. The man, realised now was the perfect opportunity to escape and he bolted out of the door. Rachel could do nothing but watch on as he ran down the corridor. Catching a glimpse at the clock on the wall, she could just about make out he time and realised the Shelby was probably waiting outside for her wondering what was taking so long.
With as much might as she could muster up, Rachel stumbled out of the choir room, falling against the wall in the corridor as made her along it. She was stopped by an overwhelming urge to cough and as she did, she saw blood coming out of her mouth. The pain was unbearable and the tears were now flowing freely from her eyes. All she could think about was Shelby. She wanted her mom. She needed her mom. As she continued down the corridor, Rachel's head began to spin. Her legs turned to jelly and it became increasingly difficult to move. How was she going to make it to the parking lot? And that's when it hit her. Shelby was a member of staff who was probably parked in the teachers parking spot, which were closer to the school than the student parking spot. Gazing up, she saw the fire exit was a couple of feet away. If she could make it to outside through that door she would only be a couple of yards away from the teachers parking lot.
With as much energy and drive as she had left, Rachel, usung the wall to steady her on her feet, made her way passed the lockers and to the fire exit. Once she had finally reached it, her head began to spin faster and she fell against the door forcing it open and falling trough it, out against the hard metal fire escape stairs outside. Clinging to the railing for dear life, she put a step forward to try and make her way down the stairs, but her head was spinning too fast and she misjudged the her footing and went crashing down to the very bottom. Her body being battered by the force of the metal against her frail figure. Suddenly she hit the ground with a bang, smashing the side of her head of the ground and knocking her out stone cold. Alone in the darkness.
Standing by her Range Rover by the front of the school, Shelby Corcoran was growing tried. Where is she? she thought to herself as she looked at the clock. They were supposed to meet twenty minutes ago but her daughter was still a no show. Shelby was suddenly pulled from her thoughts by the sound of a door crashing against a wall. Peering through the darkness, she spotted a black masked figure bursting out of the school and running off in the opposite direction. Clearly unaware that Shelby had just seen him. Then panic set in as she realised Rachel was still inside. Dropping her things, Shelby dashed inside the building, showing little regard for her own safety as the thought of her daughter alone in that building.
Sprinting down the halls, Shelby called out her daughter's name over and over again, but no response was forthcoming. Shelby could feel her heart racing with fear, and hot tears grace her cheeks as she rounded the corner towards the choir room. Suddenly she stopped dead in her tracks as she she saw the bloody handprint that trailed along the wall and the lockers. There were puddles of blood on the floor every couple of paces. Shelby let out a sob and placed her hand over her mouth, trying to prevent herself from throwing up. She felt nauseous and her knees trembled, her hands shaking as she feared for the life of her daughter. Steadying herself on her feet she burst down the corridor, following the bloody trail until she reached the fire exit.
Pushing it open, she ran through the door and stopped at the top of the flight of steel stairs. When she turned and gazed down them, her heart stopped and she could hold in her own screams as she saw her baby, lying in a bloodied heap at the very bottom. "RACHEL!", she screamed. Running down the stairs, Shelby crashed to her knees by Rachel's side, brushing the hair from her daughter's face. "Baby, wake up. Come on wake up. Oh God", Shelby said as she gently tapped Rachel's face. In that moment Shelby broke down in heart wrenching sobs as leaned over her motionless daughters body noticing the full extent of her injuries for the first time. "RACHEL!", she shouted at the top of her voice. Shelby leaned down kissing Rachel's cheek. Pulling her iPhone out of her pocket she dialled 911 and waited impatiently for an answer.
"Hello 911, what's your emergency", the woman at the other end said. "Please I need and ambulance my daughters been stabbed", she just about made out between sobs. "Ma'am what's your location?", the operator asked. Shelby wiped the tears from eyes as she placed a hand on Rachel's cheek. "M-m-McKinley High School. Please hurry", she wailed down the phone. Hanging up she tossed the phone aside and gently stroked her daughters hair. Praying to God that she would be okay. She has only found the courage to come back into Rachel's life. She couldn't bear the thought of losing her. Not like this. Not now. She needed to be her mother. But above all else, Shelby needed her daughter...