Take a Chance On Me

by: Raye

He was staring at the phone as though it was going to bite him and it didn't help that his palms were damp.. and itching. So while his eyes were watching for the slightest movement, he dragged his hands over the sides of his pants legs.

"You gonna call her?"

Josh blinked for a moment in the darkness of his office, finally staring out into the well-lit bullpen. "'Scuse me?"

She leaned one shoulder against the doorjamb, a hand cocked on the plateau of her hip. "I assssume you were intendin' to give her a call."

"And..." his eyebrows lifted to half-mast and he struggled to call her into focus, "...and this is your business....since when?"

"Whoa there, boy." She held up her hands in mock surrender. "I didn't ask for this job."

"You are my temp, right?" He knew he was getting testy... but dammit... he didn't care. "You don't even know Donna."

She cocked her head to the side. "True... very true... but I ain't dumb. A blind man could see what was goin' on inside your head."

"So I'm blind?"

She smiled. "Shoe fits... buy a second pair."

He shoved a hand through his hair. "I ask a sarcastic question and what do I get? Sage wisdom from... from... what was your name again?"

"Hmpf... deaf too."

"Hey, Josh." CJ appeared in the doorway, her voice a good deal more upbeat than her strained expression. "I just got back..." she did a double take, "where's.... who's this?"

She opened her mouth to reply.

"Never mind, that... sorry.. where's," she craned her neck into the bullpen, "....Donna?"

Josh felt his chest cave in. "She's gone."

CJ's mouth gaped open a fraction of an inch as she swallowed hard at the news. "Gone... like gone on vacation, gone?"

He drew in a breath before answering. "She quit."

"She qu-" CJ looked off to the side for a moment. Her expression beginning at bewildered, processing to shocked and rounding the bend to pretty darn pleased before Josh decided he was going to throw something at her, "she quit."

"CJ?"

"Yeah, Josh?"

"Is there something I should know?"

"About?"

God, he hated it when she hedged a question like that. "About? CJ, is there something I should know about that cryptic little smile I just saw."

She paused for a moment and looked at the temp who was watching the whole season with open enjoyment. "So, you're the temp?"

"Oh.... oh.." Josh skimmed his fingers over the handset, "you're good, CJ... really."

She continued on. "Has someone shown you around?"

"Well, not really but-"

"I'm sorry.. did I miss the memo saying that this wasn't my office anymore?" Josh skimmed his fingertips over the handset.

The temp gave CJ a knowing smile and ducked back to Donna's desk.

Turning her full attention to Josh, CJ tried to mask her smile. "Looks like I missed a lot while we were in China," her eyes didn't waver, "can't say that I'm all that surprised."

Josh nodded. "Sad... but it's true."

She stepped into the office but left the door open. "When?"

He opened his mouth to respond and thought better of it and closed his lips.

"Josh?"

He shook his head to clear the cobwebs. "What?"

She gave him a moment to focus. "When did she quit?"

He knew he looked lost and he didn't care, because it was true and he'd given up trying to make excuses to himself. "I honestly have no idea, CJ. One moment I was ordering her around and avoiding her attempts to tell me something and the next I have this," he waved his hand at Donna's desk, "woman ordering me around," he indicated a crumpled paper on the desk, "handing me Donna's cell phone number... like I don't already have it!"

"Maybe she was thinking it was helpful?"

He shoulders sagged about an inch, his chin dipping down toward his chest. "How?"

She didn't answer and so Josh forged ahead.

"How did I miss it?" He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed the fingers of his right hand into his temples. "How?"

Her voice had that awful sober tone to it. "It's been a long time coming, Josh."

He nodded. "I know."

"She needed to move on."

"I know."

"She just got too big for the job, Josh."

"I... I know." He looked up at her from under his hand.

"Then why all the questions?"

"I just wanted to know, CJ..." he pursed his lips together as he made the decision to lay bare his soul, "I just wanted to know, when she got too big for me."

She didn't say anything and frankly, Josh didn't expect her to. He didn't think he wanted to know the answer, so when she backed out of the office and closed the door behind her he didn't blink.

Instead, he waited until the echo of the doorlock faded away before he reached for his coat.