Hello everyone, I'm still a newbie here please be nice (:
Author's rant: I love HitsuMatsu pairing and they have a strong chemistry, and the way their unrequited love betrayed them, really it's just painful but this doesn't mean that I support HitsuHina which I hate, really, I prefer GinRan than that.
And the way Gin died was . . . tragic . . . it hurts you know D: I CRIED while listening to the songs, I hope you don't mind to listen while reading this fic.
Sad Rain by Aki Misato
Let This Reach You by Kokia
Always With Me (English version) by Hayley Westenra
On with the story :D Hope you like it everyone.
Sorry if it's rushed/whatnot, the grammatical errors and the OOC of the characters.
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.
The ever-flowing song searches for memories
The pain engraved by the times
As she searched for those memories deep in her mind, she would always feel happy and warm inside but now all she could feel is nothing but sadness and hurt. They say time could heal heart aches but little did they know pain is also engraved in it.
She can't help but embrace the sadness and hope that it would take her back to that time when he was there, at her side but she knows, she knows that days have gone by, he changed and died because he was, also, betrayed.
Her childhood friend, Ichimaru Gin, is now gone.
Will it be forever?
She cried unknown to everyone and she always hated crying. If only looking up could stop the tears flowing.
X – x – X
He was betrayed by his, childhood crush, best friend but he didn't mind, she was after all brainwashed by Aizen and he swore to kill him but as time goes by when his lieutenant halfheartedly shows any sign of her perkiness, he became worried and a part of him felt strangely sad.
Why?
He didn't even know because he was that oblivious.
Those feelings he felt, he dismissed them and focus on Hinamori because he knows Matsumoto is that strong. But what he just think of her was wrong when he found her crying in the office, he frowned and as if he's heart was ripped apart, again. She was about to leave when he stops her by taking her wrist.
"Why are you crying?" his voice came out low, his grip on her wrist tightens in a soft gentle way.
She bit her lip to stop its quivering, she was gonna cry any time now and she definitely won't allow to let her captain see it; her vulnerable side.
"Matsumoto" he said and motioned her to face him which she did, she was pouting, her eyes were quite red from crying.
"The captain I know wasn't so nosy like this" the grip on her wrist became loose; Hitsugaya stared at her in shocked while he froze on the spot.
"I-I-I-I w-wasn't, I was only worried!" he stumble upon his words, he flushed at the latter part, took a step back and let go of her wrist which was turning into red, he looked at it and felt guilty.
"I-I'm sorry about that" she knows what he meant with his sorry.
She rubbed her wrist and bring it to her chest ignoring his apology, she smirked, "My, my, my, the captain's worried? It's very rare to hear that word from you, captain" she said teasingly. As if on cue, he snapped and went back to his usual self back then.
"GAH! Forget what I said" he said and stormed to his desk, working again, she smiled halfheartedly.
"Thanks, captain but I'm alright" he couldn't help but look up only to find her smiling, that smile was different from what he always saw. The smile was mixed of happiness and sadness.
Why?
Then as he stared at her more, he realized. He realized that she was suffering more than him because that person she truly cares most since then is now dead; unlike him, Hinamori is still alive but she might never be the same.
Without thinking, he said, "I'm sorry" his eyes widened at the realization before he could support it, she frowned and her face changed to a sad one and immediately left the room.
He rested his forehead on his desk with a loud thud, "Okay, really, why did you say that?" he screamed to himself.
If you would look at him carefully, there's a light tinge of pink across the bridge of his nose. He didn't only realize the suffering that she went through but also his feelings.
Yes, he realized that those feelings he had been ignoring most of the time was actually developing unknown to him. He was in love with his lieutenant but is always shadowed by the feelings he had for Hinamori which he admitted, now, was one sided.
"I'm sure she hates me now" he laughs humorlessly.
"Ugh, I'm acting like a crappy teenager"
I don't understand the reason
We are drawn to each other
If it's cold and serene I want to feel and be near it.
It has been two days since that event and Matsumoto didn't drop by and Hitsugaya is now sure that she hates him now. Of course, she has the right to hate him after all but what did he do? He just said sorry and she left, maybe she didn't-.
When did I become so hopeful in this kind of situation?
For an umpteenth time, he banged his forehead again to his desk. Good thing that there weren't any bruises present after he did that for I don't know how many times. This past month she wasn't herself and he was being a complete idiot with it for being so oblivious and now it's only two days since he seen her, he wanted to really badly see her and those bright, cheery sliver blue eyes that he always finds attractive, he just realized that two days ago.
What an idiot.
And again, he banged his forehead, "No matter what happens I will never regret it"
"Damnit, Matsumoto! Where the hell are you?" he roared throughout Soul Society when he went to her house he found no one. He didn't care anymore about the weird looks he get from his rare actions but his face said otherwise.
"I will never regret it; it's better than this while seeing her in pain" he murmured and he didn't actually sensed the clouding of the skies.
While continuing his search he was, not so very lucky, now drenched in rain but he didn't mind it, again, and so he strode around more.
"Where the hell is that woman when I needed her?"
Here, very lonely.
The sound of rain non stopping
I begin to walk in the frozen world.
Matsumoto Rangiku, the cheerful goddess of Seireitei is now walking miserably under the strong and cold rain. For these past few days, her life was somewhat became utterly out of control.
"Why did he say sorry? Did he know? I think captain hates me" out of the blue to the other people's point of view, she laughed awkwardly.
She stopped her tracks when she was in front of a familiar house, she smiled. She missed the times back then, those times when Gin was alive and times when she and her captain was still the bickering and acting normal at each other.
Why does it felt so lonely?
"Why did it have to be like this anyway?" she said and walked towards the main door, she sat down and leaned on it, she shivered from the cold and surely these days she will pay the price.
"I'm sorry for everything captain, I'm sorry and thank you for worrying back then. Actually captain I used to like you but I stopped when I know you have the hots for Hinamori" she said and laughed mildly, she's getting crazier than ever.
"Ugh, I should have bought some sake" she then stood up and went into the rain, the sad rain. She used to love rain because of how comforting it sometimes gives and now it's not comfort but sadness.
Once again her mind flooded with happy memories of Gin back then, those memories she treasured dearly. The dam was then again broke and rushed out the clear salty waters.
Memories though sad still hold something true.
She sobbed silently while furiously wiped the tears away but failed, "Why? Why? Why do you have to die? You said you would change things so that in the end I wouldn't end up crying! But you! You idiot, why did you have to die and do those things, why did you . . . have to do it and leave me crying, you idiot!" she said as the sky roared and lightning flashed, the rain was getting stronger and even sadder.
She then went to her knees and looked up at those gloomy, grey skies. If only looking up could stop the tears flowing but it didn't and never will be for the likes of Matsumoto Rangiku, I don't think so.
I want to connect with you.
My heart, frozen, waiting for you
Oh yeah, shivering, waiting for you
Suddenly Matsumoto felt an arm around her, a warm one. She panicked and was about to make a move when she was shushed by that voice, her captain's voice. She really hated crying but she can't help it but just do it again.
As if reading her mind, "It's okay to cry Rangiku. I'm here, just cry it out I won't leave you, I promise" and then he hugged her tightly and kissed her wet hair.
"Because I love you" and kissed her cheek when he pulled away Matsumoto turned around, hugged him and cried at his chest and he returned the hug and smiled.
This kind of content feeling, he only felt it when Matsumoto's around, yes when she is there at his side and only her no other else.
"I thought you like Hinamori" she said between sobs.
He chuckled, despite being under the rain the two actually didn't sense the cold, "I thought too but I was wrong because you were always the one" he swore his face burning right now so he nuzzled on her hair.
After a moment, she stopped sobbing and slightly she pulled away, he was quite disappointed but mask it off only to hear, "I-I love you too" she murmured but he could hear it clearly even with the sounds of the rain coming down.
He touched her chin and tilted it up, her eyes were teary again, and kissed her at the lips passionately.
There waiting was now over and under the sad rain, their love for each other that was once severed is now fixed and entwined with each other forming the word 'couple'. Tomorrow will never be that 'normal' again it's not different either but special, very special.
Who could have thought rains like these will fixed something that was severed?
No one.
I would love if you would review or comment about it because it encourages me and also I would know my errors, thank you for reading, readers (:
This story was inspired by these songs:
Sad Rain by Aki Misato
Let This Reach You by Kokia
Always With Me (English version) by Hayley Westenra