"Friends and Foes Come; They Also Go"
By: Angel of Times Past
Captain Jean-Juc Picard of the USS Enterprise stood looking at the small aquarium in his Ready Room when he heard a voice behind him. "So sorry to hear about Mr. Data's accident," it said. "How kind of you to send your regrets, Q," Picard replied without turning around. "Oh, you do remember me! I was afraid you wouldn't after all these years." It was indeed Q. "How could I forget? You have tried to take over my ship for years now." Captain Picard was a man of about fifty without any hair. Q, on the other hand, looked to be about thirty-five. "How do you know about Data?" Picard wondered aloud. "I have my ways, old man," Q smirked. "It was the same way that I know how much you miss him." "Oh course I miss him! He was the best officer this ship's ever seen!" "Is that the only reason? I think not." "What is a cheep trickster like you going to do about it?" "Well, I'm willing to make a deal with you, Picard." "And that would be.?" He had always hated Q. Q had the ability to come and go as he pleased and was very persuasive. Picard thought he resembled a weasel. "Your precious android, Data, in return for me being the First Officer." "Now, Q, you know that soon as we reach Star Base 156 the new officer will be coming on board." It will be a very long time before we reach the star base, though," an evil grin crept onto his lips. "Why.?" "Because, you see, I've halted time." Picard looked out the window to see if they were still moving. "No, you're not going anywhere. I know it looks like it, but mortals are so easily fooled." Picard then glanced at the clock on the wall. It was still working. "So, is it a deal?" Jean-Luc thought about it for what seemed like ages to Q. Finally he answered, "Yes." 'I know I'll be regretting this soon enough,' he thought. Q blinked and was then wearing a Star Fleet uniform. "Thank you, Captain. I will be going by the name Zand," Q said and left the room; this time he used the door.
* * *
Picard was furious with himself for agreeing to Q's wants and with Q for barging in on him. "Data," Picard whispered, realizing what he had agreed to. He turned, left his Ready Room, and entered the bridge. "Captain, I finished running the scans for-" "Data. So wonderful to have you back!" "But sir, I have not been anywhere but at my post." "Oh, yes I'm sorry," Picard was happy for once in his life that Q had shown up. He tapped the communicator on his shirt and said, "Enterprise crew. This is your captain speaking. We have a new First Officer that I would like to introduce to you named Cmdr. Zand. There will be a welcoming party tonight in 10-Forward. That is all." Secretly, Picard hoped that someone would notice something odd about Mr. Zand at the 'party'. Q walked around the bridge and shook hands with everyone. Lt. Cmdr. Geordi La Forge eyed Q for a long time when he came to him. Maybe Picard's plan what beginning to work.
* * * 10-Forwar was packed with people that night, all there to meet Mr. Zand. Geordi and Mr. Worf, chief security officer, were standing in an area without too many people. "I tell you, Worf, there's something odd about Zand." "And what makes you think that?" Worf said in his deep voice. "Something doesn't look right. Like he's not. not quite human." Worf was about to disagree when a young woman came to with carrying a tray of drinks. "Romulan ale, gentlemen?" "No!" Worf almost shouted. "I mean, no thank you." "How 'bout you?" she asked Geordi. "No thanks," he said; his mind was still on his conversation with Worf. As soon as the waitress was out of earshot, Geordi began to glow, as if he had just figured out what was wrong with Zand. "That's it!" "What's it," Worf asked, puzzled. "I think he's a Romulan." "That's insane. How could a Romulan pass for a human?" Without waiting for an answer, he stalked off into the crowd.
* * *
Later that night, Jean-Luc lay awake in his quarters, staring at the ceiling. He felt a cold breeze blow over him. "Wonderful party, old man," the breeze seemed to say. "Glad you approve, Q," he didn't take his eyes off the ceiling. "Would've been so much better if I could have gotten my hands on that councilor of yours." "Deanna? She's married." "What a shame. I suppose to that Riker fellow?" "Q, what are you in my quarters at-" he glanced at the clock, "-1:30 in the morning for?" Q blinked, disappeared and reappeared lying on the bed beside Picard. "I demand you leave me alone at once or I will call security!" "Oh, you're no fun," Q blinked again and disappeared. "Wonder what that was all about?" he asked to no one in particular. Q's disembodied head reappeared and said, "If you hadn't been so rude, you might've found out!"
* * *
The next hour slowly floated by slowly. Jean-Luc couldn't sleep; too much running through his head. At 2:45, he arose and pulled on the robe. He thought for a moment, and as if he had come to a quick decision, left his quarters. The hallway was deserted except for Data's cat, Spot, who was slinking about in the shadows. Jean-Luc entered the turbolift at the end of the hall and indicated that he wanted to go to Deck 5. When the turbolift stopped, he exited and turned to the right, entering a door marked 'Main Engineering'. With any luck, Mr. Data would be inside. He was. "Yes, Captain? Can I be of service?" Data asked. "I hope so," replied the captain. "Do you remember anything.um.odd or anything at all happening within the last five days or so?" Data opened his mouth to say something and closed it, as if he had forgotten what he was going to say. "No, sir, I do not." "Right, right," replied Picard. "I will run a self-diagnostic immediately, sir." "No, Mr. Data. Don't do that. I wasn't expecting you to remember anything." "Sir, is there something that you would like to tell me?" Data was puzzled. Picard thought for a moment and he decided to do so. After Picard finished his tale, Data looked speech-less. "You don't believe me, do you?" "Yes, sir, I do believe you. What is still puzzling me is why you agreed to Q's request?" "He is very persuasive," the captain laughed. "Don't tell anyone. Your life could depend on it."
* * *
Later that day, Geordi sat in 10-Forward eating his lunch when Zand strolled in. He ordered a drink and sat down with some ensigns to chat. "Something isn't right about him," Geordi thought. "He's not human. My VISOR can tell me that much." Though his mean had hardly been touched, he quickly go up and left. Zand let his gaze follow him out the doors.
* * * "Computer, give me all available information on Cmdr.. um." Geordi paused, realizing he had no clue what Zand's first name was. ".Zand." "There is no Cmdr. Zand registered with Star Fleet." "Romulan bit is getting more convincing every minute." "Please restate request," the computer said. "That wasn't a request.."
* * *
Cmdr. Zand was lying on his bed thinking. 'Oh, what was his name.of course! La Forge.' 'What is he up to? I'm almost certain he's on to me.' An evil grin crept onto Zand's lips. 'Maybe I'll.nah. Too evil for Cmdr. Zand.but not for Q.' "Computer, where is Mr. La Forge?" "Geordi La Forge is in 10-Forward." 'Why in the worlds would someone be in 10-Forward at this hour,' Zand mused, 'oh well. My plan must begin sometime. Why not now?' Zand dressed and headed towards 10-Forward.
* * *
The Chief Engineer was pouring over various sources of information and several data pads in 10-Forward. He was drinking something green. "Why else would they serve Romulan ale?" he whispered to himself. The wooden doors silently slid open; Zand stalked in. "Can I get you anything?" the bartender asked. "Romulan ale." Once he had gotten his drink, he went to see Geordi. "Good evening," Zand said. "Rather morning, Cmdr," Geordi said without looking up. "Ah, yes. May in inquire as to what you are doing in 10-Forward so very early in the morning?" "I was about to ask you the same thing, but in answer to your question: yes. I'm doing some research on Romulans." "Really?" Zand sipped his drink. "Have you ever been there? Awful place.even to Romulans." "No, can't say I have." 'Come on; keep talking. You're telling me just what I need to here." 'Ha! He thinks I'm telling him just what he needs to confirm his suspicions. Oh yes, I am a Romulan in disguise.' Zand thought sarcastically. "So, Zand, where ya from?" "Nowhere really. I did spend a good part of my childhood on Romulas and Remus, though." "Oh you must have just loved that?" "Hum.yes." His mind was clearly on something else as he finished his drink. "I must leave. Important business to attend to," he turned and left. 'Probably needs to contact his Mother Ship,' Geordi thought with disgust. 'Maybe I'll follow him.'
* * *
"But, sir! I've got this ship under my control. If I suggested for them to fly into a black hole, they'd do-" "SILENCE!" a booming voice cried. Zand was silent. "Your time has run out 'Zand'," the voice continued. Geordi had activated the sound system so that he could listen in, but Zand couldn't hear him. "The Q will not let you back in. No matter what you do!"
'The Q? I've got warn Picard about-'
"Oh, and Q, before we continue, you should know that there is a mortal listening in. Zand, or rather Q, ran to the door and it slid open. "Hold it right there, La Forge!" "Q! Why did you lead me on about the Romulan situation?" Geordi was now pointing at the man who looked like Q. "Because it was fun." Q snapped his fingers, "Now go to bed and forget this ever happened. "Memory charms are so much fun!"
* * *
"Q," Picard said. They were once again in his ready room. "You said no one would ever notice." Picard sat down. "Someone noticed." "Well, I did a simple memory charm and he'll never remember." "That is beside the point." Q also sat down. "Cmdr. Data. Report to my ready room." "Yes, sir," Data said after entering the room. "Q?" Data said; there was an air of puzzlement in his voice. "Hello, Mr. Data. Nice to see you again," Q sounded.nice. It was out of character for him. "Q. I'd be very pleased if you would leave," Picard glanced at him. "At once," he added. "Oh, well. It was worth a try. Ta-ta." Q blinked and vanished. "Now, Mr. Data-," Picard stopped because he was horrified at the sight that awaited his eyes. Slowly, a glittering, golden beam of light twisted itself about Data, starting at his feet and moving upward. "Q!" Picard shouted. Q reappeared. "What happening? What about Data?" "I didn't promise he'd stay, did I?" Q looked satisfied. "And in answer to your latter question: What about him?" Q vanished again. The beam of light had enveloped Data and he began to dematerialize. Then, he was gone. * * *
"Captain's Log; Personal: Q and Cmdr Data have left the Enterprise. In face, no one remembers them being here. I gather that Q was attempting to take over the Enterprise to prove that he was worthy of being let back into the Q. Fortunately, his attempt failed at taking over my ship and reentering the Q. Everything is as it was after Data's-passing. Now I must prepare for the memorial service that will be held at 1300 hours, in Mr. Data's honor. Picard out." Jean-Luc sipped on his tea and thought of all the memories Data had left behind. "It is.it is green." "Saddle up. Lock and load." "Data, stop babbling." "I am not aware that I ever.babble, sir."
"I will miss you, my friend," Picard whispered into the silence.
Captain Jean-Juc Picard of the USS Enterprise stood looking at the small aquarium in his Ready Room when he heard a voice behind him. "So sorry to hear about Mr. Data's accident," it said. "How kind of you to send your regrets, Q," Picard replied without turning around. "Oh, you do remember me! I was afraid you wouldn't after all these years." It was indeed Q. "How could I forget? You have tried to take over my ship for years now." Captain Picard was a man of about fifty without any hair. Q, on the other hand, looked to be about thirty-five. "How do you know about Data?" Picard wondered aloud. "I have my ways, old man," Q smirked. "It was the same way that I know how much you miss him." "Oh course I miss him! He was the best officer this ship's ever seen!" "Is that the only reason? I think not." "What is a cheep trickster like you going to do about it?" "Well, I'm willing to make a deal with you, Picard." "And that would be.?" He had always hated Q. Q had the ability to come and go as he pleased and was very persuasive. Picard thought he resembled a weasel. "Your precious android, Data, in return for me being the First Officer." "Now, Q, you know that soon as we reach Star Base 156 the new officer will be coming on board." It will be a very long time before we reach the star base, though," an evil grin crept onto his lips. "Why.?" "Because, you see, I've halted time." Picard looked out the window to see if they were still moving. "No, you're not going anywhere. I know it looks like it, but mortals are so easily fooled." Picard then glanced at the clock on the wall. It was still working. "So, is it a deal?" Jean-Luc thought about it for what seemed like ages to Q. Finally he answered, "Yes." 'I know I'll be regretting this soon enough,' he thought. Q blinked and was then wearing a Star Fleet uniform. "Thank you, Captain. I will be going by the name Zand," Q said and left the room; this time he used the door.
* * *
Picard was furious with himself for agreeing to Q's wants and with Q for barging in on him. "Data," Picard whispered, realizing what he had agreed to. He turned, left his Ready Room, and entered the bridge. "Captain, I finished running the scans for-" "Data. So wonderful to have you back!" "But sir, I have not been anywhere but at my post." "Oh, yes I'm sorry," Picard was happy for once in his life that Q had shown up. He tapped the communicator on his shirt and said, "Enterprise crew. This is your captain speaking. We have a new First Officer that I would like to introduce to you named Cmdr. Zand. There will be a welcoming party tonight in 10-Forward. That is all." Secretly, Picard hoped that someone would notice something odd about Mr. Zand at the 'party'. Q walked around the bridge and shook hands with everyone. Lt. Cmdr. Geordi La Forge eyed Q for a long time when he came to him. Maybe Picard's plan what beginning to work.
* * * 10-Forwar was packed with people that night, all there to meet Mr. Zand. Geordi and Mr. Worf, chief security officer, were standing in an area without too many people. "I tell you, Worf, there's something odd about Zand." "And what makes you think that?" Worf said in his deep voice. "Something doesn't look right. Like he's not. not quite human." Worf was about to disagree when a young woman came to with carrying a tray of drinks. "Romulan ale, gentlemen?" "No!" Worf almost shouted. "I mean, no thank you." "How 'bout you?" she asked Geordi. "No thanks," he said; his mind was still on his conversation with Worf. As soon as the waitress was out of earshot, Geordi began to glow, as if he had just figured out what was wrong with Zand. "That's it!" "What's it," Worf asked, puzzled. "I think he's a Romulan." "That's insane. How could a Romulan pass for a human?" Without waiting for an answer, he stalked off into the crowd.
* * *
Later that night, Jean-Luc lay awake in his quarters, staring at the ceiling. He felt a cold breeze blow over him. "Wonderful party, old man," the breeze seemed to say. "Glad you approve, Q," he didn't take his eyes off the ceiling. "Would've been so much better if I could have gotten my hands on that councilor of yours." "Deanna? She's married." "What a shame. I suppose to that Riker fellow?" "Q, what are you in my quarters at-" he glanced at the clock, "-1:30 in the morning for?" Q blinked, disappeared and reappeared lying on the bed beside Picard. "I demand you leave me alone at once or I will call security!" "Oh, you're no fun," Q blinked again and disappeared. "Wonder what that was all about?" he asked to no one in particular. Q's disembodied head reappeared and said, "If you hadn't been so rude, you might've found out!"
* * *
The next hour slowly floated by slowly. Jean-Luc couldn't sleep; too much running through his head. At 2:45, he arose and pulled on the robe. He thought for a moment, and as if he had come to a quick decision, left his quarters. The hallway was deserted except for Data's cat, Spot, who was slinking about in the shadows. Jean-Luc entered the turbolift at the end of the hall and indicated that he wanted to go to Deck 5. When the turbolift stopped, he exited and turned to the right, entering a door marked 'Main Engineering'. With any luck, Mr. Data would be inside. He was. "Yes, Captain? Can I be of service?" Data asked. "I hope so," replied the captain. "Do you remember anything.um.odd or anything at all happening within the last five days or so?" Data opened his mouth to say something and closed it, as if he had forgotten what he was going to say. "No, sir, I do not." "Right, right," replied Picard. "I will run a self-diagnostic immediately, sir." "No, Mr. Data. Don't do that. I wasn't expecting you to remember anything." "Sir, is there something that you would like to tell me?" Data was puzzled. Picard thought for a moment and he decided to do so. After Picard finished his tale, Data looked speech-less. "You don't believe me, do you?" "Yes, sir, I do believe you. What is still puzzling me is why you agreed to Q's request?" "He is very persuasive," the captain laughed. "Don't tell anyone. Your life could depend on it."
* * *
Later that day, Geordi sat in 10-Forward eating his lunch when Zand strolled in. He ordered a drink and sat down with some ensigns to chat. "Something isn't right about him," Geordi thought. "He's not human. My VISOR can tell me that much." Though his mean had hardly been touched, he quickly go up and left. Zand let his gaze follow him out the doors.
* * * "Computer, give me all available information on Cmdr.. um." Geordi paused, realizing he had no clue what Zand's first name was. ".Zand." "There is no Cmdr. Zand registered with Star Fleet." "Romulan bit is getting more convincing every minute." "Please restate request," the computer said. "That wasn't a request.."
* * *
Cmdr. Zand was lying on his bed thinking. 'Oh, what was his name.of course! La Forge.' 'What is he up to? I'm almost certain he's on to me.' An evil grin crept onto Zand's lips. 'Maybe I'll.nah. Too evil for Cmdr. Zand.but not for Q.' "Computer, where is Mr. La Forge?" "Geordi La Forge is in 10-Forward." 'Why in the worlds would someone be in 10-Forward at this hour,' Zand mused, 'oh well. My plan must begin sometime. Why not now?' Zand dressed and headed towards 10-Forward.
* * *
The Chief Engineer was pouring over various sources of information and several data pads in 10-Forward. He was drinking something green. "Why else would they serve Romulan ale?" he whispered to himself. The wooden doors silently slid open; Zand stalked in. "Can I get you anything?" the bartender asked. "Romulan ale." Once he had gotten his drink, he went to see Geordi. "Good evening," Zand said. "Rather morning, Cmdr," Geordi said without looking up. "Ah, yes. May in inquire as to what you are doing in 10-Forward so very early in the morning?" "I was about to ask you the same thing, but in answer to your question: yes. I'm doing some research on Romulans." "Really?" Zand sipped his drink. "Have you ever been there? Awful place.even to Romulans." "No, can't say I have." 'Come on; keep talking. You're telling me just what I need to here." 'Ha! He thinks I'm telling him just what he needs to confirm his suspicions. Oh yes, I am a Romulan in disguise.' Zand thought sarcastically. "So, Zand, where ya from?" "Nowhere really. I did spend a good part of my childhood on Romulas and Remus, though." "Oh you must have just loved that?" "Hum.yes." His mind was clearly on something else as he finished his drink. "I must leave. Important business to attend to," he turned and left. 'Probably needs to contact his Mother Ship,' Geordi thought with disgust. 'Maybe I'll follow him.'
* * *
"But, sir! I've got this ship under my control. If I suggested for them to fly into a black hole, they'd do-" "SILENCE!" a booming voice cried. Zand was silent. "Your time has run out 'Zand'," the voice continued. Geordi had activated the sound system so that he could listen in, but Zand couldn't hear him. "The Q will not let you back in. No matter what you do!"
'The Q? I've got warn Picard about-'
"Oh, and Q, before we continue, you should know that there is a mortal listening in. Zand, or rather Q, ran to the door and it slid open. "Hold it right there, La Forge!" "Q! Why did you lead me on about the Romulan situation?" Geordi was now pointing at the man who looked like Q. "Because it was fun." Q snapped his fingers, "Now go to bed and forget this ever happened. "Memory charms are so much fun!"
* * *
"Q," Picard said. They were once again in his ready room. "You said no one would ever notice." Picard sat down. "Someone noticed." "Well, I did a simple memory charm and he'll never remember." "That is beside the point." Q also sat down. "Cmdr. Data. Report to my ready room." "Yes, sir," Data said after entering the room. "Q?" Data said; there was an air of puzzlement in his voice. "Hello, Mr. Data. Nice to see you again," Q sounded.nice. It was out of character for him. "Q. I'd be very pleased if you would leave," Picard glanced at him. "At once," he added. "Oh, well. It was worth a try. Ta-ta." Q blinked and vanished. "Now, Mr. Data-," Picard stopped because he was horrified at the sight that awaited his eyes. Slowly, a glittering, golden beam of light twisted itself about Data, starting at his feet and moving upward. "Q!" Picard shouted. Q reappeared. "What happening? What about Data?" "I didn't promise he'd stay, did I?" Q looked satisfied. "And in answer to your latter question: What about him?" Q vanished again. The beam of light had enveloped Data and he began to dematerialize. Then, he was gone. * * *
"Captain's Log; Personal: Q and Cmdr Data have left the Enterprise. In face, no one remembers them being here. I gather that Q was attempting to take over the Enterprise to prove that he was worthy of being let back into the Q. Fortunately, his attempt failed at taking over my ship and reentering the Q. Everything is as it was after Data's-passing. Now I must prepare for the memorial service that will be held at 1300 hours, in Mr. Data's honor. Picard out." Jean-Luc sipped on his tea and thought of all the memories Data had left behind. "It is.it is green." "Saddle up. Lock and load." "Data, stop babbling." "I am not aware that I ever.babble, sir."
"I will miss you, my friend," Picard whispered into the silence.