FACING FEAR by Aardwulf February 2000
The sun had set a few hours ago, relinquishing its reign over the world in a burst of orangey-pink splendour. It was unusual, to Joe's eyes, and normally he thought it very pretty, but that evening he'd had no heart to enjoy it.
He had drawn the last watch of the night, and now, with the moon high overhead, he crouched quite miserably outside a small crevice in the side of a steep rock wall, the crevice where his friends slumbered peacefully. Gomamon napped beside him, his head resting atop one of his black-clawed flippers, his long ribbony ears twitching every now and then as he dreamed. *What do Digimon dream about?* Joe found himself wondering.
Joe drew his knees up to his chest, crossed his arms on top of them and rested his head on his wrist. Heaving a sigh, he thought back to the events of the day that had started out mediocre and wound up utterly disastrous.
They'd been hiking along, as per usual, in the muggy mid-morning heat of what felt like a late summer's day. There had been the typical banter amongst the kids and their Digimon, a couple of arguments between Matt and Tai, Mimi's constant complaining - all in all, nothing too unusual.
Gabumon had been the first to notice that something was amiss. Halting in his tracks and lifting his nose to the breeze, he had no sooner alerted Matt and the others that he'd detected something unusual than an enormous insect-like monster had appeared in front of them, seeming to materialise from the scrub and trees surrounding the travellers.
Tai had ordered them to run. Everybody had been all for that suggestion, but as they turned to flee, another monster lumbered out of the brush behind them. Before they knew it, they were surrounded by huge armoured Digimon - what had Tentomon called them? Oh yeah, Kuwagamon. The same creatures that had attacked the kids upon their arrival in the digital world a few days ago, only much bigger.
Finding themselves and their humans trapped, the six smaller Digimon had transformed to their Champion levels and begun battling the Kuwagamon. Joe had learned that in situations like this, the best thing to do was take cover and wait for the dust to settle; unfortunately, there had really been nowhere to hide and so he and the other kids had had their hands full trying not to get stepped on.
But even that had been alarmingly humdrum, Joe had to admit, for the Digiworld. He had quickly learned, as had the other children, to adjust to the strange goings-on in this new dimension, and getting attacked by giant monsters every day was pretty normal. So much so that Joe would probably have started worrying if they went a day *without* having such an encounter. No, what had really made the day a disaster had come a little later.
The fight had been winding down; the six evolved Digimon were rapidly making a dent in the numbers of Kuwagamon menacing their companions. Those bugs that had not already been felled apparently had found it most prudent to flee, and it finally looked as though things were under control. Still, one particularly tenacious monster tried to get in its last licks; bellowing a challenge, it charged at Togemon. The giant cactus had barely batted an eye (well, not that she tended to blink under normal circumstances, anyway) as she'd hauled back and punched the Kuwag' right in the nose - or the spot where its nose would have been. The bug had stopped cold, teetered back and forth for a moment or two, and then slowly, gracelessly, toppled over backwards.
Right towards where TK had been standing.
All Joe really remembered clearly was that there had been a lot of screaming - at TK to get out of the way, and then at Joe to do something, as he had been standing closest to the boy. Joe had been unable to do anything but stare dumbly at the tragedy about to transpire before his eyes, until something shoved roughly past him, racing towards the petrified TK. Matt barrelled into his brother, and the pair had rolled head over heels out of the shadow of the swiftly falling Kuwagamon, only moments before the monster struck the ground. Its massive bulk threw up a cloud of dirt and leaves and caused the earth to tremble; the force of its impact, as well as its proximity, had caused Joe to utter a yelp of surprise and jump backwards, losing his balance and landing on his rear.
Utter silence had reigned for all of five seconds. The Digimon reverted to their regular forms, and everyone who was still standing rushed over to the spot where Matt huddled with TK.
"Are you okay?" the older boy had asked his trembling younger brother. The lad had nodded, looking terrified - as he'd had every right to be - until Patamon had fluttered over, squeaking his concern for his human partner. TK had turned to accept the comforting nuzzles from the little bat-winged Digimon, leaving Matt free to give in to his own feelings of fear.
And anger.
Anger that was etched clearly across his face as he rose in a single fluid motion and rounded the fallen, motionless hulk of the Kuwag', advancing on Joe at an alarming clip.
The dark-haired boy had barely regained his footing when he was practically bowled over again by Matt, who roughly grabbed the front of Joe's shirt and began shouting at him.
"What were you *thinking*?!" he'd roared, his normally placid blue eyes burning with rage. "TK could've been killed and all you did was *stand there*!"
"I-I'm sorry," was all Joe had managed to stammer out. Clearly, this did nothing to appease the other lad's fury, as Matt tightened his grip and gave Joe a hard shake.
"You're *sorry*? TK almost died and you're *sorry*?! 'Sorry' doesn't cut it, Joe! What if we hadn't gotten out of the way in time? Apologising wouldn't have brought TK back from - " He'd cut himself off right then, and the anger faded for a moment, replaced by stark terror and immeasurable grief at the very notion of losing his brother. Only for a moment, though. Then the rage had returned, and Matt had tightened his grip further and drawn back his fist.
"I should just - " he started, and Joe cringed away as best he could while still in the other boy's grasp.
"Stop it, Matt! NOW!" Sora had darted forward and placed a restraining hand on the blond-haired boy's arm. Her voice was firm, and judging from the expression on her face, she meant business.
"Hitting Joe won't solve anything. The important thing is that TK's all right. Okay? Now why don't we get out of here while everybody's still in one piece."
Matt had stared at her a few moments longer, the anger visibly draining from his face. Finally he'd released Joe with a shove, nearly toppling him again. Turning to leave, he muttered at Sora.
"Don't make excuses for him. He's nothing but a big coward. He's gonna get somebody killed someday."
Matt had stridden off to rejoin the group, assuring his brother that he was all right if TK was. Taking the younger boy's hand firmly in his, he'd led the way from the battleground, never glancing behind him. After a few moments' hesitation, Patamon and Gabumon had started after them; the other humans and Digimon soon followed suit.
Watching them go, Sora had put a reassuring hand on Joe's shoulder, giving him a sympathetic, if somewhat forced smile before heading after the departing group. Gomamon passed her as he headed back to his human.
"Don't you listen to him, Joe. He's just worried about his brother. You know how he says things he doesn't mean when he's upset."
"Yeah," Joe agreed, staring dejectedly at the ground. He shuffled after his companions, Gomamon lolloping easily along beside him.
"I think you're brave. Remember when we climbed Infinity Mountain together? That took guts!"
Joe had said nothing. After a while Gomamon had lapsed into silence as well, deciding for once to give his partner the solitude he desired.
By now the moon had risen high in the sky, casting its light over the little raised spot of smooth rock where Joe sat, working its way into the dense branches of the forest off to the southwest. Joe shivered a little. It was chillier tonight than it had been the past few evenings, and he thought it felt like rain. Of course, this being the Digiworld, maybe the life-forms here didn't need rain. It wouldn't be the first time he'd made an incorrect assumption. Joe sighed again and glanced over at Gomamon. The little water Digimon was supposed to be helping him keep watch, but Joe supposed he needed his rest; all the Digimon had pretty much worn themselves out, fighting off those Kuwagamon.
The wind picked up, causing Joe to shudder once more. He decided a walk was in order, to clear the cobwebs in his head and get his circulation going. He pushed himself off the ground, trying to be as silent as possible; but despite the scraping of his shoes against the gravel, Gomamon slumbered on. *He must be really exhausted,* Joe thought. He hoped that nothing big and deadly decided to make an appearance while he was gone, or that if it did, it would make enough of a ruckus to alert Gomamon and the others. The thought gave him a moment's pause, but he brushed off his fretting as so much paranoia and started walking.
Joe headed for the forest. He'd never been much of an outdoors person, but he'd always found the woods to be relaxing. At least, until he reminded himself of what lived in the woods - bears and wolves and crazy toothless old hermits. He reminded himself firmly that this was the Digiworld and there were no toothless hermits here. No, just huge, bloodthirsty monsters that attacked in groups for no apparent reason. Not for the first time, Joe wished he were back home in Tokyo. Sure, it was crowded and noisy, but at least there all one had to worry about was getting run down by traffic or lost in the subway tunnels. At that moment he would gladly have accepted all the urban dangers of his hometown in exchange for the unknown horrors of the Digiworld.
SNAP.
*Oh man,* thought Joe, as the hairs stood up on the back of his neck. *What was that?*
CRACK.
*Relax, Kido,* he told himself, willing his heartbeat to return to its normal rate. *No crazy old men hiding in these woods.* Probably nothing worse than a -
Kuwagamon.
It loomed in front of him, silent and foreboding, its mandibles gleaming in the moonlight. After a moment's tense silence, it screeched and darted at Joe, who dodged the razor-edged pincers and turned to run back to camp, a shriek of terror frozen in his throat.
Another bug blocked his path, lunging at him. Joe skidded to a stop and leaped out of the way, landing in an undignified heap on the ground not five feet from where the monster's jaws had embedded themselves in the packed earthen floor of the forest.
Joe scrambled to his feet and began weaving his way deeper into the woods, hoping that the trees would be too sturdy and too close together for the Kuwag's to follow. His ploy worked; the bugs rasped at him, but did not attempt to pursue him. He soon heard the low thrumming of their wings overhead as they angled northwards.
Towards the cave where Matt and the others were sleeping.
Sheer terror battled with his sense of duty, fighting to keep him hidden and alive. Ultimately, it lost. Joe broke his cover and darted through the forest, dodging trees and rocks, sounding the alarm as he did so, shouting for everyone to wake up. He hadn't really thought anyone could hear him from this distance.
And he'd hoped the Kuwagamon wouldn't hear him.
They froze in midair, turning swiftly to see their former prey temporarily exposed and vulnerable in a small clearing amidst the trees. Silent save for the hum of their insectoid wings, they advanced on him.
His first instinct was to run for camp, to let others bigger and stronger than himself handle the situation. Common sense cut in, reminding him that the Digimon were unprepared and still worn out from the day's previous efforts; leading the Kuwag's back to the cave would accomplish nothing and possibly wind up getting somebody hurt.
And then, beneath the insistent and very appealing voice screaming at him to run, he heard another voice, soft but filled with derision. Matt's voice.
"You're nothing but a coward, Joe. You'll get us all killed someday."
Joe was sick of being a coward. He'd faced much worse before - the Unimon on Infinity Mountain, the constant challenges of the Digiworld, schoolyard bullies, his father's disappointment. There was no reason he couldn't stand up to a couple of bugs if he wanted to, right?
Planting his feet, he doubled his fists and stared challengingly up at the swiftly approaching Kuwagamon. They neither slowed nor veered from their course. Soon Joe realised that his resolve was dissipating and that he was no longer poised in defiance against the two monsters - he was simply rooted to the ground in fear. That little voice reminded him to run, and this time he listened, pulling an about-face and racing off through the wood, away from the cave and the pursuing bugs.
Branches slapped at him and rocks tried to trip him up in his flight; miraculously, he only stumbled a couple of times, never quite losing his balance. Behind him, tree limbs groaned and snapped as the two bugs crashed after him through the forest, rasping their bloodlust. Joe sensed he was nearing the southern edge of the forest; the trees were beginning to thin out, which wasn't exactly helping his bug problem. He risked a glance behind him and when he turned forward again, he found himself facing a wall of solid rock. He was perhaps an eighth of a mile from the little cave where the others had set up camp, and now he was up against more of the rock wall into which that cave had been carved.
Panic began to set in. He glanced around frantically for an escape route and found none; he was a sitting duck here on this rock ledge.
Unless...
He turned to face his attackers. Tensing, he forced himself to remain calm and stay in place, waiting for just the right moment. The Kuwag's seemed ecstatic at this development and began pouring on the speed, accelerating towards their puny prey, their jaws gaping wide. They would be on him in scant seconds.
At exactly the right instant, Joe jumped out of their path.
Only one of the bugs managed to backwing enough to avoid a collision with the mountainside, veering up and back to prepare another aerial assault. The other slammed into the rock wall, knocking itself senseless and causing a small landslide to bury its upper half in rubble.
Joe stumbled to the side, trying to keep one eye on the fallen Kuwagamon and the other on the bug still aloft, meaning he wasn't paying attention to his footing. The little ledge he was on did not extend more than a few feet from the side of the mountain, and gave way to a steep drop, which Joe discovered the hard way.
He half-rolled, half-slid down the slope, trying with little success to shield his head with his arms. His glasses went missing somewhere along the way, and he realised with some irony that he'd be in big trouble without them. A moment after that thought registered, he found himself plunged into icy water.
He forced his head above the surface, gasping for breath. He'd remembered seeing a little stream near the woods as they'd approached the cliffs from the east; that creek apparently grew into this river, which was swiftly carrying him downstream. Joe had never been particularly athletic, but he considered himself to be a capable swimmer, and he fought with all his might against the current, struggling to reach the shore. A distant roaring filled his ears, and he ceased his struggles long enough to take in the distinctive manner in which the river seemed to disappear a hundred or so yards ahead.
A waterfall. Perfect.
Joe did not know how big the waterfall was, but he had a feeling he really didn't want to find out. He renewed his fight with increased vigour, finally managing to get within several feet of the right bank. Up ahead a tree limb jutted out over the water; it looked sturdy enough, and if he timed it just right, it would be within reach. He extended both arms in front of him, hoping against hope that the branch would find its way into his grasp.
It was more luck than anything else that led Joe's hands to the old limb, and he held on with all his waning might as the current dragged his lower half towards the waterfall. With the last of his strength, he hauled himself up onto the branch, draping himself over it like a wet sock. He was completely spent; it was all he could do to keep from sliding off his perch back into the frigid water.
An ominous hum filled him with instant dread. Risking a glance over his shoulder, he could make out the blurry form of the second Kuwag' winging towards him, shrieking in fury.
The good news was that the trees and brush growing on the riverbank served to knock the bug slightly off course, sending it shooting just over Joe's head. The bad news was that as it descended into the river with a massive splash, one of its hind legs struck the branch to which Joe was clinging, snapping it like a toothpick and flipping the boy into the rushing water once more.
The Kuwag's armoured bulk sank like a stone to the bottom of the river; a shimmering wing or flailing limb managed to break the surface now and again as it was swept rapidly towards the edge of the waterfall and pulled over. The sound of its outraged screech diminished as the monster plummeted to its doom, the roar of the river drowning out all other noise.
Joe was only mildly horrified at the fact that he shared the monster's fate. Shock and exhaustion were taking their toll, and he barely had the strength to hold his head above water, let alone fight for his life. His parents would never find out what had happened to him. Even if the others did manage to find a way home, nobody would believe that they'd been trapped in a digital fantasy world populated by monsters.
He snapped out of his morose train of thought as he was slammed roughly against a rock which jutted out of the riverbed barely two feet away from the waterfall's edge. The breath was knocked from his lungs and spots flickered before his eyes; he could do little but cling to the rock as though his life depended on it, which it did. He drew a shuddering breath through clenched teeth, trying desperately to focus on his surroundings. He noted that the sky was a great deal lighter all of a sudden and the sun was just peeking over the horizon, turning the clouds riotous shades of pink and gold. The sunrises in the Digiworld were almost as beautiful as the sunsets, he acknowledged, and decided to take the time to appreciate this one, as he did not know if he would have the chance to see another.
A noise behind him. A low-pitched thrumming of wings.
Joe sensed imminent mental collapse coming on.
Well, this was it, then. He was either going to be eaten by a giant bug, or he could release his death grip on the rock and be swept over the falls; at the moment neither option sounded especially appealing. Joe squeezed his eyes shut, pressed his chin against the jagged top of the rock, and braced himself for whatever was going to come next.
"Izzy! Over here, hurry! I've found him!"
Joe recognised that nasally voice. Tentomon! He dared to crack open one eye, and there, now hovering a few feet in front of him, was Izzy's multicoloured partner. The image was blurry and out of focus, as things always were when Joe wasn't wearing his glasses, but there was no mistaking the Digimon's distinctive colouring.
Tentomon turned towards the riverbank on Joe's right. The boy could hear voices coming from that direction, as well as the brittle snapping of twigs and other detritus as Tai and the others raced towards him.
Gomamon emerged from the undergrowth first, shouting at the river denizens to aid his friend. It was a strange sensation, the feeling of thousands of fish gathering around him and spiriting him to the riverbank, but right then it was the most welcome experience in the world. As soon as Joe was within reach Gomamon hauled him onto the bank, with some help from Izzy and Tai. Joe lay sprawled on his back in the litter on the forest floor, soaking wet, chilled to the bone, and utterly exhausted. His friends' blurry faces faded in and out of focus, and he could hear them talking to him, but it seemed to take entirely too much energy to focus on what they were saying. His inner voice told him that it would probably be okay to go to sleep now that he was safe; Joe agreed that that was a good idea, and he wearily closed his eyes and succumbed to the muzzy darkness.
He awoke feeling quite warm. Something crackled and popped a few feet in front of him - obviously, someone had started a fire - and as he became gradually more aware of his surroundings he could pick up voices engaged in hushed conversations. Izzy was using his favourite word, "Prodigious", to describe something, to which Tai enthusiastically agreed; Mimi was rather plaintively asking when they would be able to go find something to eat. Joe smiled faintly to himself, aware of a warm pressure at his back. Judging from the distinctly fishy smell, it was probably Gomamon. The little seal-like animal was breathing deeply and evenly; he appeared to be asleep. Joe figured that Gomamon had saved his life back there at the river, along with everyone else. What would he do without his Digi-partner?
"Saved me again," he murmured, more to himself than to anyone else, as he let his eyes slide shut again.
The warm lump that was Gomamon stirred, and Joe felt a soft muzzle nudge him in the back of the neck. "Joe? Did you say something?"
"Huhn-uh," he muttered, hunching up his shoulders. All he wanted was to sleep for, oh, about a week. But that was going to have to wait for later, as his friends crowded round him eagerly.
"Joe! Are you all right, man?" Tai reached out to shake the older boy's shoulder. Joe relented, sitting up and dragging a hand through his hair; it was nearly dry but in a wild state of disarray, almost as mussed as Tai's own scruffy mop.
"I guess so," he admitted. "What happened?"
Everybody started talking at once. Even though he was marginally more coherent now, he still had trouble figuring out what the others were trying to say. From what he could piece together, they had been awakened by a dull thud a bit before dawn - that had probably been the first Kuwag' slamming into the rock wall - and once they had discovered that Joe was missing, they'd embarked on a search expedition for him. Gabumon had followed his scent as far as the riverbank, and from there Tentomon had conducted an aerial search, finally spotting him clinging to the rock in the middle of the river.
Sora stepped up to him, holding something out. "We found these near the place where that first Kuwagamon was buried," she told him. "I don't think they're broken."
Joe accepted his glasses gratefully, examining them for damages. The lenses were a bit scratched and rather dusty, but it was nothing irreparable. He wiped off the grime on his shirt, noticing that his vest was missing, as were his shoes. Perhaps someone had hung them out to dry somewhere. Slipping the glasses on, he gazed back at his friends.
"Why'd you run away, Joe?" TK asked. His young face was earnest and puzzled, and maybe just a little hurt.
"I didn't run away," he replied, studying the ground. "I just decided to go for a walk when those two Kuwagamon showed up. I didn't want to be a coward anymore, but I wound up running from them anyway." He frowned a little, realising that he'd just contradicted himself. Sort of.
"You could've just returned to the cave," Izzy pointed out carefully.
Joe shrugged. "I know, but the Digimon were still weak from fighting the other bugs. I didn't know how well they'd be able to defend us if I led the monsters back to our campsite, so I thought I'd try to draw them off and lose them." He attempted a little half-smile. "I guess it worked."
Matt's voice cut in. "Joe," he said, and the dishevelled boy glanced up. Matt was fiddling with a stick, not meeting his companion's eyes. "That was really brave of you. Kinda stupid, but brave." He looked over at Joe and rewarded him with a rare smile. Joe grinned back, then yawned immensely.
Gomamon moved closer, patting Joe's knee with a flipper. "That's my boy!"
Joe pushed himself back against a rock, leaning against it as he watched the other kids plan the rest of the day's activities. He was not surprised to hear that most of those activities involved hiking. Mimi mentioned with a distinct lack of subtlety that she'd like something to eat before she started walking anywhere, and Tai began delegating responsibilities to the group as to finding some food.
Joe put his head back against the rock, feeling bruised and sore but strangely content. Gradually his eyes closed and his head lolled to the side; his folded hands hung limply in his lap. Gomamon turned to speak to him, but the words died in his throat as he heard a small snore issue forth from Joe. The Digimon smiled and snuggled up to Joe, resting his head on his friend's knee.
"That's my boy," he murmured, and soon joined his partner in slumber.
FIN