The loft is growing darker, weighting the romantic atmosphere created by the candles as Kurt neatly scoops a large portion of cheesecake onto his spoon, takes a bite of about half of it, before offering the spoon to Blaine.
There is something just so sexy about watching Blaine eat, or watching him study, or shave, or gel his hair or do anything really. Kurt is just so fascinated by the little things about Blaine, because it is the little things that combine together to create the beautiful young man lying next to him, propped up in Kurt's bed, with one of Kurt's hands stroking his inner thigh. Kurt watches in wonder at how Blaine's belly rises and falls gently as he breathes, and how he doesn't breathe from his chest, not really, even though he isn't singing at the moment. It's just a habit by now.
"Open up for me, sweetie" Kurt chirps, belly swooping happily at the sight of Blaine parting his lips obediently. Kurt holds out the spoon and Blaine happily leans forward, taking the smooth, creamy cheesecake into his mouth. They don't break eye contact as Blaine chews slowly before swallowing it down.
"You missed a bit" Kurt giggles, sweeping down to kiss the tiny smudge of cheesecake from beside Blaine's lips. Blaine sighs happily, one hand rubbing at Kurt's hip, the other on top of Kurt's hand at his thigh, lazily guiding him as he caresses his sensitive skin.
He knows that Blaine needs this, needs to be taken care of, gently caressed and kissed, because he doesn't get this kind of physical affection and nurturing at home. Kurt always make the effort to make his tiny corner of his and Rachel's loft as secure and private as possible so that Blaine can feel safe within it whenever he comes over. If it seemed too public, Blaine would never let his guard down, and Kurt doesn't want that to ever happen. Blaine has spent his whole life being told that he can't just be himself – it isn't enough for his family, for the bullies, even for people at school – but Kurt wants him to know that when it is just them, Blaine can relax and not worry about putting on a facade. Kurt knows all about facades – hell, he has an icy one of his own – and he loves how when it is him and Blaine alone, it is just the two of them. No appearances, no pretending, just pure, unadulterated them.
"Do you think of the future…our future?" Blaine murmurs dreamily. His wide, liquid-gold eyes stare curiously at Kurt and one of his curls has escaped his gel and cascades down his forehead. Kurt just wants to bury his face in Blaine's neck and inhale deeply, taking in the scent that is uniquely Blaine, the scent that he knows will be all over his sheets and pillow cases in the morning and that he can wrap around himself later when Blaine has gone back to Lima and Kurt is alone again.
"Of course" Kurt replies, "why do you ask?"
"I don't want to have closed doors at our house" Blaine murmurs, almost pleadingly. Kurt's eyes widen at this abrupt statement but he lets Blaine continue without comment. "I want our children to know that they can always come to us, always talk to us. I don't want to have a 'parents' retreat', or a 'grown-ups only living room'. I want to be there for our children, always."
Kurt's face softens. "Come here" he says, pulling Blaine to him, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. Blaine is pliant and limp against his chest and Kurt can just feel the implicit trust that Blaine has, the knowledge that Kurt will take care of him and that he doesn't have to try and protect himself.
"Has it been a bad week for you?" Kurt hums into Blaine's hair. He instinctively knows that it has been. Blaine has been clingy since he arrived in New York, constantly wanting to cuddle, and not speaking much. Blaine hated talking about sad things, and unfortunately the way he was treated at home classified as one of those sad things. Kurt had gently tried to get him to talk about it all afternoon, but Blaine had simply shook his head at all attempts and snuggled closer to Kurt, curling up against his body while Kurt stroked his back.
Luckily Kurt was prepared for this situation. Heavy, filling food, Kurt's undivided attention, and cuddling by candlelight in bed usually made Blaine feel secure (and sleepy) enough to reveal what was really bothering him. And today was no exception.
"Yes" Blaine breathes, trembling slightly in Kurt's arms. "My mother went away on a work conference, she…she didn't even tell me, Kurt" Blaine almost-wails. Kurt gripped him a little tighter, as if reassuring Blaine that Kurt is still there. "I woke up on Tuesday morning and the house was empty, and then that night she wasn't home for dinner and I had to eat alone again, because my father didn't get home until late and even then he barely spoke to me. He just grunted "did you go to school today?" And I said "yes" and then that's all we said to each other all evening."
Blaine sounded slightly hysterical now. Kurt ran his hand up and down his back. He knew Blaine's relationship with his family upset him. Kurt had met Blaine's parents and he couldn't believe how such two cold, distant people could have produced someone as loving, giving and gentle as Blaine. A sick feeling always built up inside him, compressing his chest painfully, when he imagined what life must have been like for Blaine growing up. Blaine needed to be nurtured and cared for, and his parents were either incapable or unwilling to give him the love that he so desperately craved. They never came to Glee Club performances at Regionals, Sectionals, even Nationals: allegedly they were working. Kurt's heart always broke when after the performance everyone was being embraced and congratulated by their family and Blaine just sat alone somewhere, hugging his arms to his chest, a dead look in his eyes.
"Father ignored me all week, except to yell at me for leaving my plate on the bench – I swear Kurt I only left it there for a minute. My phone rang I was so excited that maybe my mother was calling me, but it was just Finn making sure I had the sheet music for our new Glee song…" He breaks off, gasping.
"Blaine, did your dad hit you this week?" Kurt asks, needing to know the extent of what his boyfriend has been through. To his horror – and sickeningly not to his surprise – Blaine nods.
"Not much though" he mutters. "Only about the plate and later for leaving my school bag in the hall. He mostly just ignored me. Acted like I wasn't there, didn't answer me when I asked questions…"
"Shhh" Kurt hums, rocking Blaine gently. Kurt knew that Blaine's father's hits were more like singular sharp slaps than beatings, in that Blaine's physical safety wasn't immediately at risk. The hits were designed to humiliate more than to wound. This didn't make them okay, but at least Kurt didn't have to worry about coming back to Lima to see Blaine beaten and bruised in a hospital bed. Violence was still wrong though, and Kurt knew that it terrified Blaine and made him feel like he was worthless.
"Mother didn't get home until Thursday night" Blaine continues. When I asked her where she had been she told me not to be so dramatic. Then I asked if she could at least tell me when she was going away and she told me that I-I'm seventeen and I need to stop being so needy. I'm such a fucking nuisance to everyone." Blaine finally breaks down, his tears hot and wet as they drip onto Kurt's shoulder.
"You're not, Blaine. Not to me" he soothes. "And not to your parents, either. What you were asking for was not unreasonable. Your mother was rude not to tell you where she was going and your father…your father is just a dick." Kurt knows the words sound harsh, but really, when it comes to Blaine's father, describing him as a 'dick' is kind. He gently coaxes Blaine to let go of him and lie back on the pillows so Kurt can look into his eyes as he says his next words.
"I love you so much" Kurt murmurs. "You are such a good boy". He scoops up another spoonful of cheesecake. "Thank you for telling me."
He offers Blaine the spoon, but he shakes his head, rubbing his hand across his tummy. "I'm full, Kurt" he sighs.
"One more" Kurt bargains, "do it for me?" Blaine looks like he's lost weight – he usually does when he's feeling abandoned, he once told Kurt it's like the loneliness penetrates him and fills him up so he can't eat – and Kurt just wants to see him happy and healthy again. He feels like he patches Blaine up every weekend, only to send him back to Lima where he is mistreated and broken by his parents and the members of New Directions who act like Blaine is their personal jukebox, devoid of feelings.
Blaine nods, eyes wide and soft, opening his mouth, taking the cheesecake off the spoon. "Thank you" Kurt says, setting the plate on his bedside table. He rubs his hand gently down Blaine's arm, frowning slightly.
"You're cold, sweetheart" Kurt observes, quickly pulling his blanket up from the bottom of the bed and settling it over Blaine. Blaine shrugs drowsily, snuggling into Kurt's bed, eyes blinking closed for increasingly longer periods of time.
"Sleep now" Kurt instructs gently, stroking Blaine's cheek with his thumb. "You're safe here, Blaine. I love you so much. You're my beautiful, sweet boy, okay? I'd do anything for you. My beautiful, sweet boyfriend."
Blaine's eyes suddenly take on a wild look and he clasps Kurt's shirt, pulling him down into a bruising kiss. Kurt gasps as Blaine leaves a trail of hot kisses down his jaw, moving down to suck desperately at the pale skin of his neck. The humming sounds coming from the younger boy are delicious and Kurt feels a simmering heat starting to kindle low in his belly.
"Keep talking" Blaine begs between hot, wet kisses. "Please Kurt, keep talking."
"Blaine, you don't have to do this" Kurt reassures Blaine. One of his boyfriend's more disconcerting habits is the need to please, well everyone, but especially Kurt. Over time Kurt has learnt that Blaine always needs to 'repay' Kurt for any nice thing that Kurt does. Kurt's chest fills with concern as he watches Blaine writhe against him, kissing and sucking on his neck as though it provides some kind of elixir, and he worries that Blaine somehow feels obligated to do this in exchange for the kind words Kurt is saying. He also worries about what would have happened if Blaine had ended up with an opportunistic guy who took advantage of Blaine gentle, people-pleasing nature. Trying to ignore that particular frightening thought, Kurt runs his fingers through Blaine's curls and then down his back, trying to communicate to his boyfriend that he isn't going anywhere, and that it is his absolute pleasure to look after him and give him what he needs. "Really" he says firmly, "it's okay."
"Want to" Blaine almost growls and that primal noise sends a delightful shiver down Kurt's spine and he feels his cock twitch in his jeans. "Wanna do this, Kurt. Feels so good." Kurt let out a shaky gasp at how undone Blaine sounded already. It wasn't often that his boyfriend didn't use complete sentences or proper grammar. It usually took a lot more coaxing from Kurt to get Blaine rubbing up against him, yet that was exactly what the young boy was doing. Desperately rolling his hips into Kurt's as he nipped wantonly at his neck, emitting pleasurable mmm and oh noises as their erections collide.
"Such pretty noises, Blaine" Kurt cries, tilting his head back, exposing more flesh to the younger boy. "I love it when you get like this."
"I love that you get me like this" Blaine mumbles against Kurt's heated skin. He clumsily opens the buttons on Kurt's shirt and licks a stripe down between his nipples before blowing on it, causing Kurt to shiver in pleasure. Kurt buries his fingers in Blaine's hair as the younger boy starts to suck at his nipple.
"Uh, ooh, God Blaine, you're so good at this" he moans, letting his head fall back as he enjoys the sensation. He slides his hands down Blaine's sides, feeling his smooth skin ripple under his touch. Oh, how he loves Blaine's body. He loves that he keeps learning more about it, that they keep discovering new things together, new ways to make each other feel good. Blaine groans, deep in his chest, and his lips vibrate around Kurt's nipple. And then they are groaning in unison and everything is hot and sweet and Blaine's scent is everywhere and Kurt just needs more. He presses his hands into the small of Blaine's back, twirling his fingers around the dimples above his ass. He pushes Blaine closer to him so that their groins are grinding together and he can feel everything Blaine has.
Blaine kisses his way back up Kurt's body until their lips are desperately connecting again.
"Mmmm" Blaine moans. "Need to be close to you" he mumbles desperately, "need to feel you inside me, please."
"Okay" Kurt agrees. "Roll over, sweetheart."
Blaine shakes his head, sweaty curls bouncing against his forehead. "Wanna see you." He shuffles backwards on Kurt's thighs and lies down on the bed, spreading his legs. Kurt gazes appreciatively at Blaine's body, the tanned skin, toned-but-not-too-toned muscles, the gentle curve of his abdomen, the three freckles above his hip that Kurt loves to kiss. Blaine reaches down to pull off his underwear, but Kurt clasps his wrist softly, preventing him.
"Let me" he murmurs, and Blaine smiles, eyes wide, pupils huge in the darkness. Blaine raises his knees so that his feet are flat on the bed and Kurt caresses down his torso, applying just the right amount of pressure so that Blaine makes those sweet, mewly noises that Kurt loves so much. Kurt lips twitch when he focuses on Blaine's erection, already straining against his underwear, leaving a dark smear on the material.
"So hard already" Kurt purrs, arching an eyebrow as he eases his hands under the waistband and drags them down Blaine's thighs. Blaine's erection bobs as it is released and Kurt feels his heart stutter in his chest at the sight.
"Uhhh" Blaine breathes out, writhing on the bed as Kurt massages his inner thighs. "Oh" he squeaks as Kurt's are replaced by his mouth, hot and wet and all he can think is oh-yes-more. Kurt fumbles with his zipper, finally get it open and pushing his jeans down his legs along with his underwear. He holds his fingers out and Blaine obediently sucks them, moistening them with his tongue, covering them with saliva. Then he lifts his ass so that it is resting in Kurt's lap and Kurt circles his entrance with one sodden finger causing the young boy to squirm happily. Blaine lets out a gasp when Kurt inserts a finger inside him, gently starting to stretch him.
"More" Blaine begs. Kurt laughs gently. "Need lube" he says. "I don't want to hurt you."
"Do you remember when you stilled lived in Lima and we'd do this so often that you barely had to stretch me?" Blaine whimpers, as Kurt withdraws the lube from his cabinet and smears it haphazardly over Blaine's entrance and then his fingers.
Kurt nearly comes on the spot. "Yes" he pants. He scissors his fingers inside Blaine, and it's so warm and tight and smooth inside him that his cock pulses and wanton heat unfurls in his, seeming to flow down, molten hot, into his belly. "Touch yourself, Blaine."
Blaine's uncertain at first. He tentatively rubs his hand over his erection, gathering the pre-come at the head and rubbing it down his length. He moans deeply, eyes falling closed as he cups his balls, sighing at the combined pleasure of his own hand and Kurt's nimble fingers in his hole.
"So good, Blaine." Kurt lifted Blaine's hips slightly, positioning himself at his entrance. "You are so good for me. So beautiful." He pushes himself inside Blaine, murmuring words of comfort as Blaine tenses and gasps at the intrusion. "So tight… just relax" Kurt urges, fighting the temptation to thrust into Blaine, because Blaine just feels so tight and hot and god, he misses being able to do this all the time. Blaine bites his lip, but eventually Kurt feels the tension leaving his body and Blaine starts to push down on Kurt's cock.
"God, you look so pretty like this" Kurt moans as he thrusts in and out of Blaine's beautiful body. "I love that you're mine."
"I love that – oh-unh - that I'm yours" Blaine gasps. He locks his legs around Kurt's torso and helps push him in deeper, emitting sharp, high-pitched gasps that feed the hot fire inside Kurt. Kurt tilts his hips, pressing deeper so he hits that spot that causes Blaine to make that pretty noise Kurt likes. Just watching Blaine in this much pleasure is almost enough for Kurt.
"Blaine" he warns, "I'm close."
"Me too" Blaine gasps. Kurt feels something hot rush through him as Blaine clenches his internal muscles around Kurt's cock. Kurt reaches down and massages Blaine's balls with his hands, before stroking down his length. Blaine lets out a strangled cry, his hips jerking upwards, back straining off the bed. The aftershocks cause Blaine's channel to spasm and Kurt finds his release too, filling Blaine up as he comes. He doesn't pull out immediately even though Blaine is shifting underneath him as he comes down from his orgasm. Instead he gently lies down on top of Blaine and just holds him, feeling his heart pound and his chest heave as he gasps for air.
"Is this okay?" Kurt asks, not wanting to put Blaine through more than he can handle, especially given that he is over-sensitive from his orgasm.
"Yeah" Blaine whispers. "Feels nice that you're still so close to me."
"So beautiful" Kurt hums, pressing a kiss to Blaine's flushed cheek. "So special to me."
"Mmmm" Blaine mumbles, stilling under Kurt's weight, his body going limp and heavy against the mattress.
"Sweet dreams" Kurt whispers, brushing Blaine's sweaty hair out of his eyes before settling into sleep himself.