I Will Follow You Into The Dark.
It was getting dark outside.
She didn't want to be there, yet she was.
Her father used to tell her that she could play outside with her friends only if she came home before dark. She never had questioned why, she'd just listened.
Now she knew why her father wanted her to be home on time, the darkness was scaring her more than it should.
Now it was clearly becoming dark outside.
And here she was, walking down the street with only a thin jacket on that didn't protect her from the cold.
It didn't protect her from the dark either.
Every once in awhile, she turned around to see if someone was walking behind her. If someone was following her.
There never was someone behind her though.
There wasn't anybody who was following her either.
She wanted to be followed. She wanted to turn around and get startled because of a person who would just be inches away from her face.
Not just anybody though. God no, she didn't want to be followed by some psycho maniac. She didn't plan on getting murdered anytime soon. Or ever, for that matter.
There was someone in particular that she wished that would follow her.
His eyes could read hers like an open book. It scared her, more than the dark now to think of it.
She threw her arms around her waist to protect herself from the cold. It felt like it could get trough her even to her own bones, just like he could.
Why did she walk away from him? Why did she have to say those things to him when he had opened up his heart to her? Why did she had to put those damn walls up every time she felt like someone came too close to her?
He had been good to her. They had been good together.
One single tear streamed slowly down her face. She didn't even bother to wipe it away, no one could see it anyways.
Because she was all alone now.
Walking down the street. Breathing in the cold, dark air. It almost hurt.
She had no idea how long she had walked these empty streets. The quietness was bothering her at first, now the calm felt rather soothing.
It couldn't be that late. It just had started to get dark. Or was that a long time ago?
She felt her pockets, trying to find her cellphone so she could check the time. They were empty. She must have left it at his home while she was rushing out of his house.
Great.
Now she had to go back.
As if for the first time since she stepped foot outside, she opened her eyes to see where she was. She didn't recognize the place immediately, but as she saw the benches and the trees and the big court with the two hoops on each side, she knew where she was.
She scoffed at how much of a walking cliché she had become.
This was the place that had first brought them together. Her head and her heart didn't want to be here, yet her feet thought different about that.
She slowed down her pass, taking in a deep breath that hurt so much she had to clutch her chest.
Her eyes darted around the court, taking in the beautiful scene in front of her. With the lights shining from across the river it almost made her want to take a picture of it.
"You shouldn't be alone here, especially not when it's dark outside."
He had followed her. This time she hadn't turned around though, but she did get startled because of a person who was now just inches away from her face. More than startled actually.
She didn't think that she could scream that loud. Apparently, she could.
"You forgot this." He said as he handed her the cellphone.
Slowly she grabbed it from his hands. They felt warm compared to hers, and it sends a chill upon her spine.
"Thanks." Her voice came out as nothing more than a whisper, yet she knew that he'd heard her.
A silence felt between them and the quietness that had felt comfortable minutes ago was now just plain awkward.
"I didn't mean to scare you." He began. "You know, with what I said earlier."
"I know."
"It's just that, I've never said it before to someone in my entire life except to my mother. And maybe Haley, but she doesn't count. Well, she does, of course. But, you know what I mean."
A sad smile was framing her face. He was rambling.
"And, it took me quite awhile to bottle up the confidence to say something huge like that and really mean it. And you know, I never expected that when I would first say those three words, that person would say 'I'm sorry, I can't do this' and just run away out of my house."
She looked down, not daring to look him in the eye. She knew how hurt he was.
He had no idea that his pain didn't even compare to hers.
"Listen, Lucas-" She tried, but he interrupted her.
"No, you need to listen to me first. You have no idea how much courage it takes for a guy to say those words and really mean it with all his heart. And when he finally dares to say it, the least he expected is a hug or a kiss or even a fucking thank you. Everything is better than the words you've said to me."
"I know Lucas, but I just can't-"
"-do this." His words came out so bitter it made her cringe. "I know, you've already said that."
"Then why did you follow me? Why would you even want to look me in the eye after the you've heard the things I told you?"
"Because I want to know why you can't. Why you can't do this."
"I can't explain it into words, I just… Somehow I feel like it's the right choice to not be together."
"Do you even hear yourself? That's ridiculous! Why can't you be with me? You have to explain it to me. You need to. You owe me that much."
For the first time she looked up into those gorgeous eyes. The ones that were normally filled with happiness, or with lust or with pleasure, but now filled with pain and confusion.
"I don't trust you."
There. She'd said it.
He didn't even flinch when he heard it.
"And, I don't trust myself around you." For the second time she took a deep breath, but now she was prepared for the pain from the cold. "And I think that's because, whenever I'm around you, I'm just so happy."
"I don't understand why-"
"I'm worried that I'm not good enough for you. That, when we're married and have kids that one day you just become bored with the life you have and leave me. Or that we'll be unhappily married and you'll cheat on me and I'll tolerate it just because I don't want you to leave."
"Brooke…"
"I don't want to be like my parents. They can't stand each other. In fact, I even think they hate each other. But they were in love once Lucas, just like we are. And when you said those words I just felt so overwhelmed. But the first thing that came into my mind was that I don't want to be like her, like them. I'm so afraid to get hurt."
To her surprise he only smiled. He took a step towards her and brushed one piece of hair behind her ear. "You're nothing like her. We're nothing like them. We will never be anything like them. You won't get hurt."
"How do you know that?"
"I just do. Just like I know I'll never get tired of you. And I will never cheat on you, I promise."
She took a step backwards, and stared at him. "I-I can't say it back. Yet."
"You don't have to."
And then, slowly, she walked towards him and hugged him and kissed him hard on his lips like there was no tomorrow. They stayed like that for what seemed hours, till she let him go. She grabbed his now ice cold hand and together they walked to his home.
She did get hurt though.
He never kept his promise, because months later, he cheated on her. With her best friend.
She now felt the pain she feared more than the cold and the dark combined. And it hurt even a hundred times more than she expected it to.
She hadn't seen it coming. And that's why she'd never expected that after he'd cheated, she would never trust any guy with her whole heart ever again.
She would never find true love like that again.
Now she wondered, if it ever was true love.
Because a person who had claimed to love her with all his heart, would never break his promise and cheat on her and hurt her this much.
She wished he would have accepted her answer when she'd said that somehow she just knew they shouldn't be together. She should have listened to that voice in her head, that had warned her for all the pain that he could cause.
She wished he had never followed her that night.
Thank you for reading this story. I just want to say that all spelling mistakes are mine, and that I don't own One Tree Hill, the characters or the song I used for the title. Reviews are love. :