a/n: this was written for my lovely friend sara (strikingsparks) because she's been having a rough time lately. expect lots of typos since there was no beta and i just wanted to publish this already.
the accompanying mix can be found on 8tracks under grace ( period ) elephante
nodus tollens: n. the realization that the plot of your life doesn't make sense to you anymore—that although you thought you were following the arc of the story, you keep finding yourself immersed in passages you don't understand, that don't even seem to belong in the same genre—which requires you to go back and reread the chapters you had originally skimmed to get to the good parts, only to learn that all along you were supposed to choose your own adventure
i. bad wolf bay | get lonely - the mountain goats
The Doctor - the proper one, with his big box and even bigger hair - leaves her standing on a beach twice. The first time he gives her nothing but a broken heart and sore throat; the second time he leaves her with everything, but neither of those outcomes feels right.
This imitation of the man she so fiercely loves feels like him and tastes like him, but she knows he still isn't him. Instead he's a cheap card trick, an illusion meant to entertain children at the fair. His nose is cold pressed into her pink cheeks, and as she hears the TARDIS disappearing for what she knows will be the last time, she almost can't bring herself to look. Not this time. Not ever again.
"Well, 'spose we should be getting home. Mum won't want to leave Tony with Mrs. Turner for very long." Rose finally says, avoiding those eyes, not betraying the ringing in her ears or the despair in her heart.
Instead of nodding, the imitation Doctor reaches out to take her hand once more, "I am him, Rose."
"No, you aren't." She sighs, not wanting to start a fight this early into their - relationship? Friendship? What do you even call a man who looks like the love of your life and whom you've only known for the space of five minutes?
"Why wouldn't I be?" He challenges, only half of a frown lining his handsome face.
She looks out to the tide crashing into the cliffs and thinks back to watching the Earth burn, and feeling the time vortex in her brain, and seeing that face for the first time - so different but so familiar and so, so unbelievably her Doctor's.
"You just aren't, yeah? I can tell." Then she motions towards her mum and dad. "Let's go then, we've got loads of rooms for you to choose from."
He doesn't fight her, electing to walk behind her, and Rose doesn't know if she'd rather him be here on this bleak beach or never have existed at all.
The Tyler's house is nice, which is just a bonus of a parent in a parallel world being rich. Yet even with loads of money, Jackie still chose to wear her pink tracksuits, most of which clashed spectacularly with Pete's three piece suits.
"Cheer up, sweetheart. The Doctor did all right in the end. We all got a happy ending, didn't we?" Jackie says later that night over a cup of tea, staring down to Tony's toys strewn all about their sitting room.
Rose laughs bitterly, "You can't just throw two people together and expect it to be okay, mum."
"Well it's better than what you got left with last time, Rose." Jackie says sharply. "He gave you what you deserved: a chance at a normal life. What more could you ask for?"
With that, the older woman stood to go and check on her youngest child. Rose watches her walk away, blinking back the tears.
She curls up in her bed, trying not to think of the lanky man in the room next to her, focusing on the stars outside of her window. So many possibilities... so many things she could never see.
"That one's rubbish anyway... The last time I was there they ran me out with pitchforks." A voice startles her from near the doorway.
"Don't do that!" She snaps before she can control her temper. But he doesn't waver, instead he comes to sit on the end of her bed.
After a moment of studying his profile, she says, "Do you remember that time we went to Jupiter's smallest moon?"
"Ah yes, it was bigger on the outside. Great food, though." He smiles, so familiar and so different again.
She laughs out loud at that, "I don't think a burger and chips should be considered 'great food.'"
"Oh, I dunno... I've been to the Dark Ages, I know what bad cooking is. Don't ever let Justinian the First offer you his famous quiche, you will regret it." He says animatedly, still smiling.
She rolls her eyes and then sighs, "You must know what all of them are like."
Swivelling to look back out her window he frowns, "Oh, I wouldn't dream of claiming to know all of them. There were so many I meant to..." He clears his throat, dropping his face from the direction of her window. "To go see."
Rose, for one fleeting moment, sees all the years etched onto his face and is flooded with shame at her own selfishness.
"Maybe you will." She says warmly.
He shakes his head sadly, "No, Rose Tyler, I will only ever have the universe in my memory from now on."
He vacates the room quickly, closing the door behind him with a sharp 'click,' leaving Rose to feel more alone than ever.
ii. london | alone together - fall out boy
Tony's second birthday is ridiculous in its opulence, but Rose bites her tongue instead of lecturing her mother on all those years they lived on coupons and hand-me-downs. It's hard to understand how different this world is, a mirror image... She feels it in her bones, deep down in the very core of her, that she doesn't belong here.
She surveys the party goers with a weary smile and watches her mum wipe cake from her brother's cheeks. They all look so happy, and she's happy for them, she really is, but it makes her chest ache at the same time.
"Don't tell your mum, but I'm quite glad she hired caterers for this party." The Doctor says, two plates full of cake clutched in his hands.
Rose manages a small smile, "Yeah, at least living in a parallel world was good for one thing - keeping her out of the kitchen."
Taking her plate from him, she motions to the empty spot next to her.
"This must all seem so boring to you. Birthday parties, and cake, and balloons." She says softly, but he shakes his head.
"These are the things that make humans so interesting: you all fear getting older, but you celebrate it each year. The human race is just one big walking oxymoron." He grins before sticking a forkful of cake in his mouth.
Admittedly, Rose has to agree with him, but then another thought strikes her.
"When's your birthday, Doctor?"
Her question is met with silence and she turns to look at him incredulously.
"You've got to be joking!" She says, shaking her head.
"It's been a long time! I'm over 900 now," He says with an only mildly defensive tone. "I'm usually too busy to remember to stop and eat cake."
Rose laughs out loud at this, bumping her shoulder into his playfully.
"I've been thinking of going off on my own for a while," He voices after a few moments of silence pass between them.
She tries not to let his off-the-cuff words burn her, but they still do. Even this Doctor is going to leave her behind.
"Why?" She asks, trying not to sound upset.
"Oh, well it's Earth isn't it? Loads to see! I could go to New Mexico... never been, but I've got all the time in the world... well, I say all the time, I mostly mean decades... well, I say decades..." He rambles off so quickly that her heart clenches with the nostalgia of it all.
Suddenly, she finds her resolve.
"Well if you're leaving, I'm coming with you." She doesn't mind the crack in her voice with the last word, but instead of trying to argue with her, The Doctor's face lights up.
"Now there's the Rose I know!" He grins, swinging his legs out like an eager child.
Under the moonlight, she can make out all his pores and see the veins circulating throughout his skin. He needs a haircut badly, but Rose is kind of fond of the way it sticks up in the back so she keeps putting it off. Even though he's not the actual Doctor, he's still here and he wants her to stay with him, and she decides right there that it counts for something.
Jackie isn't happy at all when Rose announces to her parents and a babbley Tony that she's leaving for a while.
"Travelling? Do you think I'm stupid enough to fall for that a second time, Rose?" She shouts over the kettle. "I thought the whole point of all this was that you would be staying put for once. Settling down."
"Mum, I'm 21! Besides, The Doctor and I..." She trails off trying to understand how to put their relationship in words. Taking in a deep breath she tries again, "It's like... It's like I can feel the world turning under my feet, and I can feel all the stars that were and never will be burning in my head. I've seen emperors fall and planets burn, so how am I supposed to just stay in London after all that?"
Pete looks over to his wife in reassurance, "Jackie, it's not like she's going to the moon or anything, it's just America."
"I think America's scarier than the moon, and besides, what money are you going to live on? I'm not giving you a penny to go off to God knows where with that man!" She says, slamming the tea on the counter, redder in the face than Rose has seen her in years.
Fortunately, The Doctor pokes his head around the corner then and smiles to Jackie.
"No worries about money," He grins, pulling a familiar object out of his coat pocket and twirling it between his fingers.
"Where did you get that?" Rose asks with incredulity.
The Doctor smirks, "Oh this? I nicked it off the other me. I doubt he even noticed." He tucked the sonic screwdriver back into his jacket. "Either way, it works on the ATM."
Jackie's jaw drops at this, "So you're just going to start stealing now, is that it?"
"Oh, I don't really consider it stealing when I just saved the entire human race a few months ago." The Doctor quips back and Rose can't help but laugh.
Sometimes she forgets that Donna Noble helped create him, but this fact becomes blatant during most conversations between him and her mother.
Instead of getting in the middle of her mother and the Oncoming Storm, Rose turns to her father, who quietly slips her a few crisp bills and smiles at her.
"I know I wasn't there for most of your childhood, but I want you to be happy, and if he makes you happy... then I'm satisfied." Pete says, rubbing her shoulder gently.
Rose smiles, leaning in to kiss her Dad's cheek, "I'll see you soon, yeah?"
"Yeah. Your mother will calm down eventually." Pete grins, letting his daughter go.
Later that night, after Tony's put down and Rose has time to actually pack for once, she and The Doctor climb aboard a bus heading to Heathrow. He's traded his usual suit for a pair of jeans and a t-shirt her mum bought him during their first few days of living together.
"Scared?" He asks once they're seated and staring out at the London skyline.
"Nah, I mean, this is what we do, innit?" She says back nonchalantly, but her heart swells with pride at the grin she receives in return.
iii. tennessee | i can't make you love me - bon iver
"Doctor, I think we're lost." Rose states bluntly, noticing that they've passed the same flea market sign at least three times.
Sighing from behind the steering wheel, The Doctor glances over at her map, "Cars, who even comes up with these things? The TARDIS was loads easier to steer."
"Not that you ever landed us in the right time or place," Rose quips back, but her companion chooses to ignore it.
Mountains extend as far as she can see, and though they are beautiful peaks that seem almost blue under the sunlight, even inside their rental vehicle the humidity is sinking into her skin.
They stop at a slightly run down looking petrol station, and Rose hops out of the small blue Prius without any word.
"Good evenin', ma'am. What can I do ya for?" An elderly gentleman with a protruding belly asks from behind the counter.
Rose smiles, "Well, I think we're lost. I was wonderin', could you give us directions to New Mexico?"
The gentleman lets out a booming laugh and looks between Rose and The Doctor's face in amusement.
"Why is he laughing, Doctor?" Rose says, turning to face him with a stern expression.
"It's just, y'all are about 2,000 miles from New Mexico." The man says, laughter still etched into his face. "You're in the great state of Tennessee right now. I can recommend several mighty fine hotels with nice honeymoon suites 'round here if ya would like?"
"A honeymoon suite?" The Doctor asks, eyebrows furrowed in that familiar 'I-don't-understand-humanity's-sense-of-humor' way.
Unfortunately, Rose realizes only a moment too late what the man thinks is going on between her and The Doctor.
"Y'all are newlyweds ain't ya? Ya sure look like a set, all foreign and lost." He says, taking his own chance to look confused.
"Oh no, we're just friends-"
"She's just my travelling companion-"
They both speak at the same time, and Rose looks over at him and mild incredulity. She gets that it's what they used to be, but then they had become so much more. The Doctor doesn't meet her gaze, and she's forcibly reminded that this is not her Doctor.
After getting directions to the nearest hotel, Rose icily slides into the rental car. She ignores any attempt of conversation, pulling her bag out of the trunk upon arrival at the Best Western.
"Rose, you can't ignore me forever," He huffs when they get their room key.
"I thought I was okay with all this. With you, but I dunno if I am anymore, all right?" She finally answers, looking up into his face and counting each freckle on his cheekbones.
The Doctor sighs and pulls on the face he generally makes during any discussion about feelings.
"You know how I feel about you, Rose." He says simply, but she feels smothered under his gaze instead of loved.
She shakes her head, "No. I know how he felt about me. Don't you get it? You're a different person, yeah? You don't have to be him. You could be anyone."
Her words appear to take him by surprise and he doesn't open his mouth to argue. He sits down on his bed, staring down at his hands for several moments.
Rose can feel her heart beating in her ears and she thinks that maybe there's still a piece of the TARDIS in her brain. Just one tiny fragment that held onto her, still directing her somewhere, somehow. She thinks she can hear the stars burning in her mind and she takes a deep breath.
"I'm gonna take a shower, all right?" She says, but he doesn't appear to hear her words.
She shuts the bathroom door sharply behind her, trying not to think of Bad Wolf Bay and those words whispered in her ear, but they still echo around her brain and bleed into her dreams.
"I need you, Rose Tyler."
iv. florida | dead sea - the lumineers
For the most part, The Doctor goes by John Smith when they're out in public. It's weird for her, not having to answer Doctor who? Instead people just smile and tell him what a common name he has.
Things don't really change between them; they still drive through mountains and marshlands and instead of the stars burning next to them, there are fields of wheat and corn dancing in the wind.
Rose remembers when she was a little girl and her mother promising a trip to America someday, how they would go all the way to Florida. A place surrounded by ocean and smelled like orange blossoms. In actuality, Florida is really just very hot, with sand everywhere and lots of middle aged parents in shirts covered in palm trees.
The Doctor buys himself a beach shirt covered in pineapples from a Cuban vendor. Rose laughs at the straw hat he plucks off the shelf, but he still buys it, too. She picks out a TARDIS blue bathing suit and ignores the pang in her heart.
They find a beach easily enough, the white sand almost blinds her in the early afternoon sunlight. There are children running around, building sand castles next to their parents umbrellas. She listens to high giggles as they're caught upon the air and smiles at the sounds of happiness.
"Salty air, how brilliant!" The Doctor grins, sticking his tongue into the breeze.
She watches him in mild amusement, wondering if maybe he was like her and never had the chance to swim in a warm Earth ocean. She doesn't ask, it doesn't really matter anyway.
Before she can register what's happening, there's a hand in hers and a voice in her ear saying "Run!" and they're both crashing their way into the ocean, laughing so hard it hurts.
The salt water is warm and washes over her forcefully, but she loves it. The Doctor is floating next to her, smiling over the waves cresting under his chin.
"Float with me, Rose." He says gently, his hand still wrapped around hers. She puts her head back and feels the quiet seep into her ears.
For just a little while it's exactly like it used to be - just them, floating, free falling, hand-in-hand in an undiscovered universe.
She breathes in and out deeply, thinking quietly to herself: home.
v. arizona | rosé - the feeling
Her twenty-second birthday sneaks up on her quickly. She didn't even realize how long they've been gone until she looks at a calendar in a roadside diner they stop in at.
"Oh my god, it's my birthday." She says quietly over her slice of pie, looking up at The Doctor, who doesn't seem remotely surprised by this discovery.
Instead, he keeps eating his omelet without letting on that he really even heard her. His eyes are concentrated on a packet of sugar, and she doesn't feel like pushing it. She finishes her own plate of pancakes in silence.
Most of the day is spent in the little car, driving through miles and miles of flatland and then eventually into the desert. The sun starts to fade behind the horizon, but it's almost impossible to tell where the Earth ends and the sky begins.
The Doctor finally pulls off onto some back road that she was sure he couldn't possibly have known existed. They park just as the orange of the sunset has bled into the entire sky around them.
"We're camping out here tonight!" The Doctor says excitedly, pulling a tent out of the trunk and motioning for her to help him set it up.
The expanse of red rock stretches on and on into the distance and after they get their makeshift camp assembled, Rose wanders through the rocks and takes in the naturally built arches with wonder in her eyes.
It reminds her of beautiful planets with no skyscrapers and she thinks that they can't possibly get any farther removed from England than they are here.
By the time she gets back to where she started, the stars are all out above her, shining brightly. There's a telescope standing in the middle of camp and The Doctor is leaning over it, adjusting odd knobs and squinting.
"What's all this, then?" Rose asks, walking over to stand next to him.
Looking up, she traces the constellations she'd once learned as a teenager; stars she now could name as homes instead of just bodies of light.
"One of Scorpius' stars has gone into supernova." He explains briefly, straightening up and motioning for her to look into the telescope to see for herself.
She leans down, brushing a stray piece of hair out of her face and squints to look into the lens. At first she doesn't see anything, but then her eye focuses and there is a violent burst of pink in the otherwise ever-expanding darkness.
"Oh my god," She breathes, thinking she can smell the stardust from where she stands.
"In the future this supernova will be called RT 2009." The Doctor says quietly, staring up at the sky himself.
Rose stands up to look him in the face, "How do you know that?"
"Time isn't a straight line, Rose," He smiles softly, "This supernova was always going to happen... I just made sure the name was appropriate."
"You... named a supernova after me?" She says slowly, trying to let that thought steep in her mind.
But then she blinks and when she opens her eyes she sees something different - a man clothed in the light of stars, great and terrifying and extraordinary and beautiful. His hair sticks up at odd angles and his wrists are too small, but Rose feels warm just looking at him.
She throws her arms around his neck, pulling him into her, and he's laughing in her ear.
"Happy birthday, Rose Tyler."
vi. interlude | happiness - jonsi & alex
Sometimes they just decide to drive instead of stopping in different states to see all the tourist attractions. Rose spends most of her time with her bare feet dangling out the window, watching the different tags speed by.
Thanks to the sonic screwdriver, they're never short on cash, and Rose enjoys a lifestyle she would never have even dreamed of four years ago. They eat everything from fried foods to expertly crafted cuisines, and she wears jean cut-offs, taking in the diverse American culture.
The Doctor prattles on about different alien planets and what customs the Earth has taken from them, but he looks happy in the sunlight filtering in through the windshield. Rose wishes things could stay like this forever, that there could always be a new sunset for them to head towards with no worries and no fear. There's always a hollow ache in her chest for the TARDIS, but she tries not to live in the past.
They stop off somewhere near Las Vegas and Rose decides that after six months on the road she probably should phone home to her parents.
"Hello?" Her father answers the phone and Rose can't help but smile.
"Dad!" She says loudly into the reciever, and she hears what sounds like Tony crying in the background.
"Is that you Rose?" A muffled noise comes in through the line, and she can hear her father yelling, "Jackie! Rose is on the phone!"
"About time! It's been six months since we've heard from her, I thought she might've been sold into one of those black market prostitution rings!" Jackie's loud voice comes in, but Rose just rolls her eyes.
"I'm fine, by the way," She says, giggling a little. "How's Tony?"
She listens as her father tells her all about Tony's potty training and driving the new nanny mad. His tone is full of pride, and Rose finds herself happy that Tony gets to have this Pete and Jackie.
"Okay, give Tony a kiss for me, and tell mum not to worry so much." Rose says after ten minutes.
"I will. We miss you sweetheart," Pete says softly.
"I miss you too, Dad. I'll see you soon, yeah?" She answers.
"Yeah. And Rose?" Pete pauses for a moment, "You sound happy."
"I am happy." She says, realizing that she's never been happier than she's felt for the last month. "Love you. Bye."
She hangs up the phone and walks back towards where The Doctor is trying on a new pair of sunglasses. He grins up at her, his hair dancing in the breeze.
"Onwards?" He asks, and she nods, wrapping her arm in his.
"Onwards."
vii. san francisco | turning page - sleeping at last
She loves San Francisco almost as much as she loves London. They turn in the rental car they've lived out of for nearly seven months, electing to walk around the city and feel the warmth on their faces.
"Ah, San Francisco, one of the greatest things humanity ever thought up!" The Doctor cheers, walking along, his faded Converse slapping against the pavement.
Rose reaches out and wraps a hand in his and they get lost in the crowd of Californians and tourists, contentedly pointing out different things and laughing so hard they can't breathe.
"Mum would love it here, look at all these shops!" Rose says, looking up to her companion.
"I can't say I'm disappointed that she didn't come along," The Doctor smirks back, pausing near one of the street vendors to look at little wood carvings. He plucks up a blank piece of wood and bends over to speak with the vendor.
"You go on, I'll catch up." He tells Rose and she nods, already walking off to look at the tent full of scarves.
It's funny the way life with The Doctor changes her. She feels like she's known him forever, like she's waited her entire life just to meet him. Of course, after Sarah Jane she knows she isn't the only one, and even if the man she's been with for the past seven months isn't the real Doctor, she still got so much more than Sarah Jane or Martha or any of his other companions who loved him had.
Maybe in the end, it wasn't The Doctor who was different, it was her. The first face this Doctor had ever seen.
"Let me see your wrist," His voice startles her out of her thoughts, and she extends her arm before she can even ask why.
There's a small bracelet on her wrist when she pulls it back, a round piece of wood with a wolf carved into one side, and when she flips it over she recognizes the Gallifreyan script.
"What does it say?" She asks, glancing up at The Doctor, but she already knows.
"Bad wolf." He answers simply. "I also got one with Tony's name." Pulling the other small bracelet out of his pocket.
Rose looks down at it, feeling tears swell in her eyes at the thought that for once in a very, very long time, The Doctor has a family. A proper one with birthdays and Christmases and little kids to buy presents for, and she realizes that she misses them.
"Do you think we can go back to London for a bit?" She asks, staring down at her bracelet. "You could give Tony his gift, and it's Mum and Dad's twentieth anniversary soon."
The Doctor takes her hand in his with ease, "I kind of miss London myself."
She knows he doesn't really, but he would miss her and so he's agreeing to going back to her loud mum and brother who is in his terrible threes. Her mouth splits into a wide smile and she squeezes his fingers.
They board a plane the next morning, watching as elderly couples and business men climb into their seats. Rose is half asleep when the hostess brings around the breakfast plates.
"Newlyweds?" The woman asks in a hushed tone, clearly not trying to wake her.
She hears The Doctor give a little laugh in return.
"Oh no," Rose braces herself for his words. "We're much more than that." She thinks he turns to look at her, but she doesn't want to open her eyes and ruin the moment.
When she snuggles in closer to him, he just holds tightly to her, and she wants nothing more than to stay by his side forever.
viii. london (part a.) | l.o.v.e. - nat king cole
Jackie breaks one of the finer China cups when Rose and The Doctor walk through the door, tan and smiling. She scoops them both into a hug and starts bustling about for another set of cups to make tea.
"And then Beth down at the market said your father could do much better than me, and I let her have it," Jackie prattles, but The Doctor and Rose are too busy staring at each other to really pay much attention to her words.
"Oy, you two. You spend seven months together and you come home and treat me like a neighbor?" She snaps, pushing between them to carry the tray of tea into the sitting room.
Pete's sprawled on the floor with Tony, helping him put together some kind of robot to play with and The Doctor immediately offers his own expertise to modifying the toy.
"Sorry, mum. I did miss you loads. Happy anniversary, all right?" Rose smiles, taking a cup from her mother and sipping it carefully.
"Oh, all right. And we're having a small get together in the back garden tonight." Jackie says from behind her own cuppa. "I expect you both to be there!"
The Doctor looks up and grins, "Wouldn't miss it for the world, Jackie."
The 'small get together' in the back garden turns out to be over 100 people all in suits and fancy cocktail dresses. All in all, it makes Rose feel a little itchy as she waits on The Doctor to make his appearance.
She sees all these people who she knew back home, trying to remind herself that this is her home now. Tony is dancing with Mrs. Turner, all small dimples and a spitting image of Pete.
Her blue dress is long and she can't even remember the last time she wore one, but she still puts on a smile and says hello to everyone she meets.
Hiking up her dress to climb the stairs to one of the more private balconies on their property, she catches sight of a pinstriped suit. He's there, like he could read her mind, smiling down at her.
"Oy, where've you been then?" She asks, walking up to meet him.
"Oh, you know, here and there." He says, sticking out a hand to help her up the last stair. "You look fantastic."
She blushes and bows her head.
"May I have this dance, Rose Tyler?" He asks and she laughs and nods.
She knows he's a good dancer, though her footwork is clumsy at best, but he does most of the work as the brass band floats up to where they're spinning in private. He hums along to the music, his converse keeping their careful distance from her own feet. He dips her ridiculously just to make her laugh. The music shifts into a slower beat, but he doesn't let go of her.
Leaning into his chest, Rose closes her eyes and listens to the reminder that he is here and alive.
It takes her a moment to notice that she's hearing the sound of two hearts pumping in sync. She pushes herself back in bewilderment.
"What's wrong?" The Doctor asks, eyebrows furrowed.
Rose points to his chest, "You said you only had one heart. You said you were part human!"
Rather than getting defensive, The Doctor lets his shoulders slump in defeat. He takes a step closer towards her, palms turned up.
"I've been trying to tell you for months, Rose." He doesn't drop her gaze, but he does take a deep breath.
"What does that even mean?" Rose asks back, staring at him as if he's sprouted a new head.
Placing his hands squarely on her shoulders, The Doctor says as gently as possible:
"I am The Doctor, Rose."
vii. london (part b.) | lego house - ed sheeran
"No.. No you aren't." Rose stutters, tears swelling up in her eyes. "That isn't funny, all right?! That's just... just a sick joke!"
He frowns a little at her words and drops his grip on her.
"I traded places with the metacrisis version of me." He says rationally, but she shakes her head in disbelief.
"But what about him committing genocide and needing me?" She asks, staring up at him. "And what about growing old together?"
The Doctor gives her a half-smile, "Oh, Rose Tyler. It was me. I pressed that lever. I knew I needed you to keep me from ever doing that again." He glances down at his hands, "I gave all my remaining regenerations to the other me. This is the last face I will ever wear."
Rose takes a step back, thinking about what he's saying, what he's trying to say. She thinks of him leaving her on a beach, each time with a different outcome. She thinks of the first time he ever took her hand and told her to run. She thinks of the first time she saw this face, all angles and hair and smiles.
"But... why? Why would you do all this?" She asks, now crying, and she can feel her mascara running but she can't bring herself to care.
"The one adventure I could never have. That was you, Rose." The Doctor says evenly. "I still need you, just as much as I did on that night I first met you and every day since then."
He steps towards her, "Rose Tyler, I-"
Without warning, she pulls him to her, kissing him like he's going to disappear again. Maybe she'll wake up alone in her bed and this will have all been some bizarre dream, but for now she doesn't plan on letting go.
"Love you," Is muffled against her lips, but she still hears it.
When she lets him go, she can't help but grin, "It's really you."
"It's really me." He echos, running a hand through her hair. "And I'm not going anywhere without you ever again."
Rose nods, "Forever, yeah?"
"Yeah." He smiles, and then, "So how do you feel about Argentina?"
They board a plane before midnight, hands clasped tightly.