DISCLAIMER:
All owned by Joss Weadon.
Song is by Beth Hart, "Mama"
She sat at the bar, and ordered another shot of whiskey. Once the bar keep poured it, she drank it down quickly; hoping the buzz would take the pain away. She listened to the woman singing on stage.
Mother may I, I would say
Yes sweet baby take it away
It won't be long
Just remember that
Powerful is the woman in you
stay true
& she'd come to me
when fire & water was gone
to caress the empty with a song
Tears welling up in her eyes, streaming down her face. She felt someone sit next to her. She glanced over and noticed the peroxide blond headed man glancing back at her.
"Spike," she mumbled.
"What's it to ya," he said back.
"What are you doing here?"
"Checkin up on ya. Doin me vampire duties."
"Go somewhere else. I am in no mood to deal with you."
"Too bad. You got a nice girl out there, all miserable because you decided to take off."
"Not my problem."
"It is too your problem. She loves you, and you love her, so shut the hell up, and go back to her, give her a chance."
She closes her eyes again. The words sinking into her very soul.
Saying why cry for anger
that bullets the sky
just remember
I'll remember & mama
I'll get by
I know my face
seems crazed & wild
but I got her eyes
a mama's child am I
She's blessed with grace
& is smooth as a line
& when I shade
"I know it hurts, ducks, but she still loves you. What happened in the past is past. She forgave you a long time ago."
she helps me shine
& she comes to me
when there's nothing
I believe & holds me so high
yes I am free
saying why hold the anger
it won't let you fly
"How the hell can you be so sure, Spike. I mean she was pretty pissed at me. I let her down. I let everyone down."
just remember
I'll remember
& mama mama I'll get by
Confused by my own illusions
she said that it's only my pride
& even the simplest solutions
still won't heal my mind
So I'll remember
I'll remember
& I'll get by
(Beth Hart, Mama)
"She is alive ain't she? Don't give up. She needs you. She'll get sloppy if you don't come back. She'll eventually get killed, because you are too selfish to realize that she needs you in her life, and you need her. Red, I know it's hard. I know you both came close to losing a good friend, but that don't mean you should give up all that you've had."
"What do you mean?"
"Tara is still alive and kicking. After you ran off, Buffy began CPR, and brought her back. Just enough till the EMT's arrived. Buffy hasn't left her side at the hospital. You should visit her Red. She'll be feelin better if she saw ya."
"Tara is alive? And Buffy hasn't left her side?"
"Yup."
"How bad is Buffy?"
"Her arm was broken, and some nasty cuts and bruises, but besides that, she is doin just fine. A bit heart broken too."
She looked back down at her shot glass. She then laid money down by it and got up.
"Take me there?"
"Sure thing, Red."
They walked out and headed to his car. He drove them both to the hospital. At the entrance, she looked down at her clothes. They were still torn and dirty. She hadn't changed them yet. She walked in and Spike led her to their room. Outside the room were her friends. She just looked at them, and held her head down. Joyce Summers walked over to her and pulled her into a fierce hug.
"Oh gods Willow, she has been lost without you," Joyce whispered.
Willow began to cry in the older woman's arms.
"I'm sorry," Willow whispered.
"Don't be. She needs you. Go to her."
She let go of Joyce and slowly walked towards the door. She looked inside and noticed Buffy sitting by Tara's bed. From what it looked like, Buffy hadn't left that spot she was sitting in. Her head was bowed towards her chest. She opened the door slowly, so she wouldn't wake them. Tara opened her eyes and smiled.
"Hey Wills," Tara whispered.
"Hey yourself."
"Where have you been?"
"Around."
Willow walked to the other side of the bed, taking Tara's hand.
"I'm sorry."
"For what, Willow?"
"For letting this happen to you."
"I believe you said it best, when you said it was your choice to get involved. It was my choice. Just like it was your choice to run away and nearly kill Buffy."
"How did I do that?"
"You broke her heart, Wills. She is head over heels in love with you, and I know you feel the same way, that's why we never hooked up. I care about you both, Wills. She saved my life, but you nearly took hers away. You just ran away after I got hurt. She risked everything to save me, because she thought you were in love with me."
"Why did she think that?"
"We were always together, alone. And you stayed a lot of times. But I told her that some of the spells made you tired and weak. Sure, you and I did fool around together, but you are a sister to me, not a lover. She is your true soul mate. This is the first time she has slept since we got here."
"She hates hospitals. Always has since she was a little kid."
"I know. She told me. You look like hell, Wills."
"Been drinking for the past couple of days. Spike found me at the bar down town."
"I asked him to find you. I know it's been just two days, but you guys gotta talk about this, Willow. I mean she is lost without you. Sure she was pissed that you got me into danger, but that is beside the point. Look at her, her face is stained from tears."
Willow looked over at Buffy, who was now waking up. Willow walked over and knelt by Buffy as she woke up. Buffy smiled when she saw Willow.
"Hey Wills."
"Hey Buffy. I'm sorry."
"I understand. I shouldn't have been so mean to you. But look, I saved her. Took all I had, but I did it."
"Yeah you did."
"Wills? What's wrong?"
"I'm not in love with Tara, Buffy, I'm in love with you."
Buffy just sat there dumbfounded. Deep down she knew that it was true.
"You and Tara?"
"Are just friends," Tara answered, and smiled at the both of them, "I've known since I first met Willow that her heart belonged to you. I have been waiting for you two to get together now for awhile."
"Well, I still would have done everything to save you Tara, you mean a lot to me and to Wills, plus our group."
"I know, Buffy, I know.
"Wills, I love you too. I have for awhile now. Why haven't I said anything? Well, Oz, and Angel, Riley, Parker and any other mistake in the male population I have made. Though Angel wasn't a mistake, except for sleeping with him. And I really thought you and Tara were together."
"We are good friends, Buffy. Yes, Tara and I did fool around, but she's right, we are better as sisters than lovers. I love you Buffy, I always have. And you answered my question."
"Yeah."
Buffy opened out her one arm, her other in a sling, and Willow hugged her gently. Then Willow gently kissed Buffy on the lips. They were together like this for a few moments, till Tara started to feign coughing.
"Excuse me, virgin eyes in the room," Tara joked.
"You wish," Willow grinned.
"Oh you are so dead for that comment."
"I'll be waiting."
"Girls, girls, can we fight later? I mean, oh the hell with it. Tara, I know there may be only one thing on your body that isn't de-virginized, but I will not speak of such things," Buffy grinned.
"Grr, both of you are so dead when I am better."
"Promises, promises," Willow chuckled.
"Ok guys, let me get some rest. And I think you two need to have a lot to talk about."
"Yeah, and Tara?"
"Yes Wills?"
"Thanks."
"Any time."
Willow leaned over Tara and kissed her forehead. Then Buffy did the same thing. Willow and Buffy then headed out of the room. Joyce looked at Buffy and gave her a fierce hug.
"Take good care of each other, ok," Joyce said, softly.
"We will mom."
Joyce looked over to Willow.
"I promise to always take care of her, Mrs. Summers. I was just really scared. I thought I screwed up."
"Hey, we all get that way sometimes Willow, and its ok to runaway, just as long as you come back and face the consequences."
"I will never leave her again, Mrs. Summers, she means to much to me."
"Good. You girls have a lot to talk about, now go. Talk, and be happy."
Buffy and Willow nodded at Joyce and headed out. They walked hand in hand to the park, and say down on a bench.
"Do you want this," Buffy asked.
"To be with you? Yes, Buffy, more than anything else in the world, there is nothing I want more."
"Good, because this is what I want too. Ever since I met you Willow, I always knew you'd have my heart one-day. Not Angel, or Parker, or even Riley, but you, Willow, had the claim on my heart from day one. You wanted to get up that day and leave, but I didn't want you too, I saw how special you truly were. You are special, Willow, and I want to be with you, always."
"And even though I was really attracted to Tara, and loved Oz, you were the one who saved me. You took the flashlight and beat the monsters over the head with it if they came after me. Ever since we were sophomores, Buffy, you have always seen me differently and always cared a little bit more than everyone else did. Yes, you did see how special I was, and I see how special you really are. I love you Buffy, and I am sorry that I ran away."
Buffy leaned in and kissed Willow gently on the lips.
"You're forgiven."
Buffy smiled at Willow.
"I will always forgive you."
The two girls held onto each other, knowing that the best was yet to come.
The end….for now.
All owned by Joss Weadon.
Song is by Beth Hart, "Mama"
She sat at the bar, and ordered another shot of whiskey. Once the bar keep poured it, she drank it down quickly; hoping the buzz would take the pain away. She listened to the woman singing on stage.
Mother may I, I would say
Yes sweet baby take it away
It won't be long
Just remember that
Powerful is the woman in you
stay true
& she'd come to me
when fire & water was gone
to caress the empty with a song
Tears welling up in her eyes, streaming down her face. She felt someone sit next to her. She glanced over and noticed the peroxide blond headed man glancing back at her.
"Spike," she mumbled.
"What's it to ya," he said back.
"What are you doing here?"
"Checkin up on ya. Doin me vampire duties."
"Go somewhere else. I am in no mood to deal with you."
"Too bad. You got a nice girl out there, all miserable because you decided to take off."
"Not my problem."
"It is too your problem. She loves you, and you love her, so shut the hell up, and go back to her, give her a chance."
She closes her eyes again. The words sinking into her very soul.
Saying why cry for anger
that bullets the sky
just remember
I'll remember & mama
I'll get by
I know my face
seems crazed & wild
but I got her eyes
a mama's child am I
She's blessed with grace
& is smooth as a line
& when I shade
"I know it hurts, ducks, but she still loves you. What happened in the past is past. She forgave you a long time ago."
she helps me shine
& she comes to me
when there's nothing
I believe & holds me so high
yes I am free
saying why hold the anger
it won't let you fly
"How the hell can you be so sure, Spike. I mean she was pretty pissed at me. I let her down. I let everyone down."
just remember
I'll remember
& mama mama I'll get by
Confused by my own illusions
she said that it's only my pride
& even the simplest solutions
still won't heal my mind
So I'll remember
I'll remember
& I'll get by
(Beth Hart, Mama)
"She is alive ain't she? Don't give up. She needs you. She'll get sloppy if you don't come back. She'll eventually get killed, because you are too selfish to realize that she needs you in her life, and you need her. Red, I know it's hard. I know you both came close to losing a good friend, but that don't mean you should give up all that you've had."
"What do you mean?"
"Tara is still alive and kicking. After you ran off, Buffy began CPR, and brought her back. Just enough till the EMT's arrived. Buffy hasn't left her side at the hospital. You should visit her Red. She'll be feelin better if she saw ya."
"Tara is alive? And Buffy hasn't left her side?"
"Yup."
"How bad is Buffy?"
"Her arm was broken, and some nasty cuts and bruises, but besides that, she is doin just fine. A bit heart broken too."
She looked back down at her shot glass. She then laid money down by it and got up.
"Take me there?"
"Sure thing, Red."
They walked out and headed to his car. He drove them both to the hospital. At the entrance, she looked down at her clothes. They were still torn and dirty. She hadn't changed them yet. She walked in and Spike led her to their room. Outside the room were her friends. She just looked at them, and held her head down. Joyce Summers walked over to her and pulled her into a fierce hug.
"Oh gods Willow, she has been lost without you," Joyce whispered.
Willow began to cry in the older woman's arms.
"I'm sorry," Willow whispered.
"Don't be. She needs you. Go to her."
She let go of Joyce and slowly walked towards the door. She looked inside and noticed Buffy sitting by Tara's bed. From what it looked like, Buffy hadn't left that spot she was sitting in. Her head was bowed towards her chest. She opened the door slowly, so she wouldn't wake them. Tara opened her eyes and smiled.
"Hey Wills," Tara whispered.
"Hey yourself."
"Where have you been?"
"Around."
Willow walked to the other side of the bed, taking Tara's hand.
"I'm sorry."
"For what, Willow?"
"For letting this happen to you."
"I believe you said it best, when you said it was your choice to get involved. It was my choice. Just like it was your choice to run away and nearly kill Buffy."
"How did I do that?"
"You broke her heart, Wills. She is head over heels in love with you, and I know you feel the same way, that's why we never hooked up. I care about you both, Wills. She saved my life, but you nearly took hers away. You just ran away after I got hurt. She risked everything to save me, because she thought you were in love with me."
"Why did she think that?"
"We were always together, alone. And you stayed a lot of times. But I told her that some of the spells made you tired and weak. Sure, you and I did fool around together, but you are a sister to me, not a lover. She is your true soul mate. This is the first time she has slept since we got here."
"She hates hospitals. Always has since she was a little kid."
"I know. She told me. You look like hell, Wills."
"Been drinking for the past couple of days. Spike found me at the bar down town."
"I asked him to find you. I know it's been just two days, but you guys gotta talk about this, Willow. I mean she is lost without you. Sure she was pissed that you got me into danger, but that is beside the point. Look at her, her face is stained from tears."
Willow looked over at Buffy, who was now waking up. Willow walked over and knelt by Buffy as she woke up. Buffy smiled when she saw Willow.
"Hey Wills."
"Hey Buffy. I'm sorry."
"I understand. I shouldn't have been so mean to you. But look, I saved her. Took all I had, but I did it."
"Yeah you did."
"Wills? What's wrong?"
"I'm not in love with Tara, Buffy, I'm in love with you."
Buffy just sat there dumbfounded. Deep down she knew that it was true.
"You and Tara?"
"Are just friends," Tara answered, and smiled at the both of them, "I've known since I first met Willow that her heart belonged to you. I have been waiting for you two to get together now for awhile."
"Well, I still would have done everything to save you Tara, you mean a lot to me and to Wills, plus our group."
"I know, Buffy, I know.
"Wills, I love you too. I have for awhile now. Why haven't I said anything? Well, Oz, and Angel, Riley, Parker and any other mistake in the male population I have made. Though Angel wasn't a mistake, except for sleeping with him. And I really thought you and Tara were together."
"We are good friends, Buffy. Yes, Tara and I did fool around, but she's right, we are better as sisters than lovers. I love you Buffy, I always have. And you answered my question."
"Yeah."
Buffy opened out her one arm, her other in a sling, and Willow hugged her gently. Then Willow gently kissed Buffy on the lips. They were together like this for a few moments, till Tara started to feign coughing.
"Excuse me, virgin eyes in the room," Tara joked.
"You wish," Willow grinned.
"Oh you are so dead for that comment."
"I'll be waiting."
"Girls, girls, can we fight later? I mean, oh the hell with it. Tara, I know there may be only one thing on your body that isn't de-virginized, but I will not speak of such things," Buffy grinned.
"Grr, both of you are so dead when I am better."
"Promises, promises," Willow chuckled.
"Ok guys, let me get some rest. And I think you two need to have a lot to talk about."
"Yeah, and Tara?"
"Yes Wills?"
"Thanks."
"Any time."
Willow leaned over Tara and kissed her forehead. Then Buffy did the same thing. Willow and Buffy then headed out of the room. Joyce looked at Buffy and gave her a fierce hug.
"Take good care of each other, ok," Joyce said, softly.
"We will mom."
Joyce looked over to Willow.
"I promise to always take care of her, Mrs. Summers. I was just really scared. I thought I screwed up."
"Hey, we all get that way sometimes Willow, and its ok to runaway, just as long as you come back and face the consequences."
"I will never leave her again, Mrs. Summers, she means to much to me."
"Good. You girls have a lot to talk about, now go. Talk, and be happy."
Buffy and Willow nodded at Joyce and headed out. They walked hand in hand to the park, and say down on a bench.
"Do you want this," Buffy asked.
"To be with you? Yes, Buffy, more than anything else in the world, there is nothing I want more."
"Good, because this is what I want too. Ever since I met you Willow, I always knew you'd have my heart one-day. Not Angel, or Parker, or even Riley, but you, Willow, had the claim on my heart from day one. You wanted to get up that day and leave, but I didn't want you too, I saw how special you truly were. You are special, Willow, and I want to be with you, always."
"And even though I was really attracted to Tara, and loved Oz, you were the one who saved me. You took the flashlight and beat the monsters over the head with it if they came after me. Ever since we were sophomores, Buffy, you have always seen me differently and always cared a little bit more than everyone else did. Yes, you did see how special I was, and I see how special you really are. I love you Buffy, and I am sorry that I ran away."
Buffy leaned in and kissed Willow gently on the lips.
"You're forgiven."
Buffy smiled at Willow.
"I will always forgive you."
The two girls held onto each other, knowing that the best was yet to come.
The end….for now.