A Single Tear

It was I who loved her first; I who knew her better. Anthy Himemiya. Although Saionji was at Ohtori longer, he only loved her because of her beauty. Later, he became attracted to her quiet, sweet personality. The personality drew me first. After all, what is perfection, without the beautiful matching personality? Saionji was such a brutal person who didn't deserve the attentions of all those swarming girls. I, too, have known the feeling of this attention. However much I may despise Saionji, I'll have to say that we do have two things in common: our love for Anthy and the everyday torture of being trailed by squealing girls.

"Miki!!! Here you are!" Groaning slightly so as to not upset anyone, I turned around to see who it was. If I wasn't the soft-spoken, mild-mannered kind person people knew me as, what I would have done right then and there was to bolt off in the opposite direction. Damn it, it was Nanami and her bothersome little gang. Sometimes I wonder if it is a hobby of theirs to stalk people...

"Oh my goodness, Miki, you'll never believe it! Anthy IS GONE!!! Forever! She left yesterday! She must have had some fight or whatever with Akio-sama, and BOOM, she's gone!" Nanami gushed happily, clinging on to my arm. "Now, you don't have to worry about her anymore!"

"Anthy... gone?" I asked softly, speaking to nobody in particular. Nanami gave me a quizzical look, tossed her head back, and pouted. "What are you so sad about, Miki? I know you liked her, but now that's over with and done! You've got me now!" Without even speaking to her, I brushed her and her minions aside on my way to the door of my dorm. Gone...

No, she couldn't have had a fight with Akio. They were much too close. Most likely she knew something about the disappearance of Utena, and decided to do something about it. Yes, that was most likely what happened. But to leave so suddenly like that... something must have been wrong.

Now I remember what was wrong. It was that time when I watched her water roses after the disappearance of Utena. After she watered a white rose, she trembled horribly. Dropping her water can abruptly, she couldn't hold back a tear. A single tear. I've seen her cry once or a few times, but this was the first tear that was true. Such pure sadness nearly set me off, too. Controlling myself, I figured that it would have been pure embarrassment if anyone saw Miki Kaoru crying. Thus, that must have been the reason she left so suddenly. And damn Nanami for enjoying it, too.

She's looking for Utena...

Now, there will be no future love for me. She'll never come back. I know it. She and Utena have so much to do together in the future that I won't be a part of it. Not that I want to, anyway. All I want is for Anthy, my sweet, to be happy. Never again do I want to see her cry. Oh, Anthy.

My dorm room has a balcony. Perfect. Walking out on to it, I breathe in a fresh medley of flower scents. Ah, yes, the roses. Once my favorite and still my favorite. Gently I look out over the beautifully carved white balcony. Right underneath it is a flowerbed of blue roses without thorns, the ones that Anthy planted just for me. Without Anthy's precise care, they are no longer thriving and blooming like they should. Anthy, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for not taking care of them.

Climbing on to the balcony to get a better view of them, I smile to myself. Anthy, please live your days happily without me. With Utena. I'll be happy for you, Anthy, whatever it is that you will do. And forgive me...

With one last sniff at the roses, I drop down, in a flying pose.

Anthy, forgive me for ruining your flowerbed...

Before I die, I'll shed a tear of mirth just for you. For your future happiness. I would shed more, but I couldn't, for I envy Utena. I wonder if she knows how lucky she is to have Anthy... as a friend? Or as a lover?

This is for you, Anthy...

A single tear.

Author's Note: Well, this is my first try at writing a truly tragic and romantic piece, so sorry if it is a bit awkward. It is also my first attempt at writing a piece in the perspective of a male... please give me your feedback! Constructive criticism! (notice the CONSTRUCTIVE) Please!