Title: Pain

Author: JKM

Summary: During a battle with Kougaiji, Sanzo is killed, leaving behind Goku to fend for himself. As the Seiten Taisei crumbles from the pain the heavens stir and the Merciful Goddess offers the soul of Sanzo a deal, return to earth as Konzen or watch Goku suffer for eternity.

Pairings: Sanzo x Goku, Konzen x Goku, Gojyo x Hakkai, Kougaiji x OC

Warnings: Character death, yaoi, shonen-ai, OC

Disclaimer: Saiyuki does not belong to me and I am making no money off this story.

Note: This is my first time writing a Saiyuki story, however am no stranger to fanfiction. It has been some time however. I can leave this as a ficlet or continue with the whole story, I'd love to hear some assessments. And if the warning is not enough, there is Yaoi, boy x boy love. Don't like, don't read. I'm working on the first chapter right now so if you review, I'll post.

The blood was everywhere; it stained the white ground as blank stares landed. He had been Kougaiji's newest comrade, loyal to a fault and now blood spread around him in a dark spray, crimson against the white ground, one of his weapons, a pair of daggers, lay beside him, the other was buried in the chest of the other blond figure.

Blood stained the pristine robes of the sanzo priest, unmoving as Goku let his pain be known in his screams, holding Sanzo close. Tears fell from his golden eyes, his hand covered in blood as he shook his head, not wanting to believe it. Genjo Sanzo was gone from this world, and Goku was alone. Unknown to him five hundred years ago he had felt the same pain when Konzen had been crushed beneath the gate, nothing left of his form.

The screams were unintelligible, the cries of Sanzo diminishing into sounds of absolute pain. Neither Gojyo nor Hakkai dared stop Goku, dared to try to remove the priest from his arms because there was just no telling what the brunet would do.

It had happened so quickly, the blond demon had responded to the fight by throwing the dagger. It had struck the priest in the chest, imbedding deep into his heart and blood had spurted out, staining his robes and scripture. No one had ever thought that he would die so easily but with the way the blood flowed out he had no more than a few minutes.

Goku had gone into a rampage, attacking the demon until he was covered in his own blood. He tried to fend for himself but it was too late. A final blow to his chest crushed his lungs, sending his ribs caving in. He had coughed a spurt of blood as he looked up at Goku, pleading before the Nyoi Bo crushed his skull. Goku never knew his name was Katsuro, never knew that he was Kougaji's lover. And what's more… he didn't care. He didn't want to fight anymore as soon as the blood had been spilled, instead retreated to Sanzo's side and snarling at any that dare come near them.

He was already dead, bleeding too heavily for Hakkai to heal him. Goku was unconcerned about his own injuries, only clinging to Sanzo, the cries continuing. They were inhuman screams of pain, sending a shudder through Gojyo's spine as his red eyes were cast downwards.

Kougaji had lifted Katsuro up and carried him away, Yaone, Lirin and Dokugakuji following him in silence. They wouldn't push the fight, not today. They wouldn't be able to get their hands on the scripture anyways.

Finally Goku turned his head up towards Hakkai, eyes brimming with tears. "Heal him! Heal him!"

"Goku… I…"

Instantly the youkai was on his feet, hitting Hakkai as hard as he could, fists leaving bruises against his chest as Hakkai stopped Gojyo from interfering. Instead his green eyes stared down at Goku who finally collapsed to his hands and knees, sobs escaping him.

"Hakkai…"

Goku had stumbled blindly into the room, staring blankly as if off into another world. He was a long way from home. The temple… when had he started thinking of that as home? He wasn't sure. With hand gripping the sheets he buried his face into the pillow. He didn't bother moving, even when Hakkai knocked on the door to tell him they were going to go downstairs to eat.

All he could think about was Sanzo. How could they continue west without him? He was the reason they were all there. Hands clenched in the pillow, the sounds of desperation continuing to emerge from Goku and even when he lifted his head his eyes burned and blurred from the tears that continued to stream down.

Goku had never known anything could hurt this much. The tightening of his chest was overbearing and all he could do was stare. There was a sound, announcing someone entering as Gojyo placed some food on the ground.

"If you get hungry…" there was no insult, and that in and of itself was so unlike Gojyo. But he wouldn't tease the monkey, not now. Not when he could barely tell up from down.

Looking up with bleary eyes Goku rubbed the tears away with his sleeve. Instantly he was on his feet and ran towards Gojyo, crushing the kappa in an unusual hug. It wasn't unusual for Goku to hug, but it was always Sanzo. But now he was gone and the half demon could only lightly pat Goku's head as he buried his face in Gojyo's chest, the sobs wracking his body.

Though over five hundred years Goku was still a child at heart, and he had just lost something very important to him. As he was held Goku continued to sob, not even noticing when Hakkai came around from behind to hold him and stroke his hair. Held by his two friends Goku eventually fell into a dreamless sleep, his body worn from exhaustion, his mind numb.

Lifting up Goku's limp body Hakkai placed it on the bed, covering him before ushering the other into their shared room. With two rooms Gojyo usually shared with Goku, while Hakkai was with Sanzo, keeping the two couples separated in fear that Sanzo would be pushed too far.

But not anymore. While Gojyo and Hakkai had their own advice as what to do with the monk's body Goku had insisted on a proper burial, however that was proving to be troublesome. They couldn't exactly bring the body with them, and if it was shipped back Goku would certainly want to be there. Gojyo had to wonder if Goku was a far more devout follower of buddha than the monk himself. Hakkai meanwhile was certain Sanzo would have prefered to be cremated in private rather than a huge ceremony. In the end between cremation, a proper burial, and leaving the body there to rot, Hakkai had won out in the traditional way of solving their arguments, by gambling.

And so a jar with Sanzo's ashes, his banishing gun, his cigarette and lighter, and the Maten Sutra was all that was left of Genjo Sanzo. Upon their return they would scatter the ashes in the river Sanzo had once been pulled from. They were all in Goku's possession, who would not give them up willing, nor would Gojyo or Hakkai try to take them from him.

As Hakkai sat on the bed in silence, Hakuryuu perched his shoulder he felt a hand resting on his arm. Glancing up his real eye focused on Gojyo. Despite the many complaints about Sanzo, and the willingness to leave his side they all felt the loss deeply.